An Evolving Man Podcast

Epizode

• Why Do the Same People Keep Triggering Me? Leadership, Shadow Work and Boundaries 08.07.2026 13min

  Why do the same people keep triggering us? Why do certain relationships, colleagues, family members or situations seem to provoke the same reaction again and again? In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I explore emotional triggers from the perspective of leadership, Jungian psychology, boarding school trauma, nervous system regulation and personal sovereignty. This is an important subject for anyone in leadership, coaching, relationships, parenting or personal development because the p...
• Kindness in Schools: Creating Emotional Safety for Children | Masha Kastner & David Moss | AEM #165 03.07.2026 59min

  In this deeply moving episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I speak with Masha Castner and David Moss, founders and directors of Kind Waves. Kind Waves is a UK charity created to help schools build deeper cultures of kindness, emotional safety and positive relationships. The charity was born from the heartbreaking death of Masha and David’s 13-year-old daughter, Helena, known as Heli, who took her own life. Through their grief, Masha and David have become passionate advocates for changing the e...
• 5 Reasons We Need to Stop Sending Future Leaders to Boarding School 01.07.2026 11min

  Prince George is set to attend Eton College, continuing a long tradition of future leaders being educated in elite boarding schools. But is this really the best way to prepare someone for leadership in the 21st century? In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I explore five reasons why we need to stop sending our future leaders to boarding school. Drawing on modern leadership literature, boarding school syndrome research, attachment theory and the work of writers such as Nick Duffell, Joy...
• Porn Addiction, Shame & Mindfulness | Jeremy Lipkowitz on Breaking Free from Destructive Habits | AEM #164 26.06.2026 1h 1min

  In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I speak with Jeremy Lipkowitz, executive coach, meditation teacher, leadership facilitator and founder of Unhooked Academy. Jeremy works with high-achieving men who want to break free from destructive habits, porn addiction, compulsive sexual behaviour, shame and emotional avoidance. After overcoming addiction and depression in his early twenties through meditation, Jeremy left a doctoral programme at Duke University and spent time as a Buddhist mon...
• Keir Starmer Resigns: What Britain’s Leadership Crisis Reveals About Emotional Intelligence 24.06.2026 10min

  For Thursday's leadership workshop: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/1991361811785?aff=oddtdtcreator Keir Starmer’s resignation marks another major moment in British political leadership. If the UK is now heading towards its seventh Prime Minister in just over a decade, the deeper question is not simply who comes next. The deeper question is: What kind of leadership culture are we creating? In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I reflect on leadership in the UK, the limits of command-and-...
• Boarding School Syndrome, Power & Politics | Dominic Waterson on Boris Johnson, Tony Blair & Elite Leadership |AEM #163 19.06.2026 1h 30min

  Why do so many politicians, business leaders and influential public figures come from boarding schools? In this fascinating conversation, I sit down with researcher, author and podcaster Dominic Waterson to explore the hidden influence of childhood experiences, elite education and institutional culture on leadership and power. Drawing on years of research for his book Traitors: The Pandemic Politicians, Dominic examines the backgrounds of figures including Boris Johnson, Tony Blair, David Cam...
• The Conversations You're Not Having | Piers Cross 17.06.2026 9min

  For the workshop: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/the-conversations-youre-not-having-tickets-1991361811785?aff=oddtdtcreator&keep_tld=true Many leaders, entrepreneurs and former boarders avoid the conversations that matter most. Not because they don't know what needs to be said. But because somewhere deep in the nervous system, speaking up still feels dangerous. In this episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I explore why so many of us avoid difficult conversations, where this pat...
• Lessons from Training 90,000 People | Why High Achievers Still Feel Empty | AEM #162 Will Steel 12.06.2026 1h 4min

  What if the thing holding you back isn't your circumstances, your team, your strategy, or even your mindset? What if it's the story you've been unconsciously living for decades? In this powerful conversation, leadership coach and author Will Steel shares his journey from Royal Air Force pilot to transformational coach and leadership expert. Together we explore authenticity, emotional intelligence, presence, childhood conditioning, pressure, leadership, identity and the pursuit of fulfilment. ...
• Boarding School Syndrome: The Grief We Were Never Allowed to Feel | Piers Cross 10.06.2026 11min

  When my wife Michelle died in 2025, I expected grief. What I did not expect was that her death would reconnect me with another loss that had remained hidden for decades. The loss of my mother. The loss of my family. The loss of home. The loss of safety. The loss that began when I was sent away to boarding school. In this deeply personal episode of An Evolving Man Podcast, I explore the striking similarities between bereavement and the boarding school experience. Drawing on the work of Joy Sch...
• Police Chief: From Ego to Emotional Intelligence: Dr. Ron Camacho on Leadership & Trauma | AEM #161 05.06.2026 1h 3min

  What happens when a leader confronts their own trauma? In this fascinating conversation, Piers Cross sits down with Dr. Ron Kamacho, police chief, leadership consultant and author, to explore how emotional intelligence transformed his life and leadership. Ron shares his journey from highly driven, ego-based leadership to a more compassionate, accountable and emotionally intelligent approach. Together they discuss: Childhood trauma and leadership The father wound and identity&...
• Prep School vs Public School: Which Was Harder? 03.06.2026 15min

  One of the questions I hear most often from former boarders is: "Why did I hate prep school but love public school?" Or sometimes: "Why was public school much harder than prep school?" In this solo episode, I explore the different experiences people report and why those differences may exist. Drawing on stories from Roald Dahl, David Cameron, Ranulph Fiennes, Bear Grylls and John Peel, I examine how children adapt to boarding school environments and why the first boarding experience often has...
• Why Ex-Boarders Struggle With Boundaries | Boarding School Trauma, People Pleasing & Leadership 27.05.2026 19min

  Why do so many boarding school survivors struggle with boundaries? In this episode, Piers Cross explores how boarding school conditioning can shape people pleasing, emotional suppression and difficulty saying no later in life. Drawing on trauma theory, attachment work and years of coaching leaders and ex-boarders, Piers explores why boundaries can feel dangerous for many trauma survivors — and why nervous system regulation is essential when learning to hold healthy boundaries. Topics include:...
• Why Do We Self Sabotage As Ex-Boarders? 20.05.2026 13min

  To register for the webinar: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/why-smart-leaders-still-self-sabotage-identify-and-break-hidden-patterns-tickets-1988408152310 Why do we sabotage the very things we say we want? In this episode, Piers Cross explores self-sabotage through the lens of boarding school survival patterns, trauma, leadership and nervous system regulation. Drawing on Gay Hendricks’ concept of the “Upper Limit Problem,” Piers explains how many ex-boarders unconsciously return themse...
• Polyvagal Theory, Vagus Nerve & Boarding School Trauma 13.05.2026 16min

  Here is the link to this Friday's podcast with Sara Warner about the vagus nerve and wearables: https://youtu.be/HpxcTW0oKI8 In this episode, I explore polyvagal theory, the vagus nerve, childhood trauma and boarding school syndrome. Following my recent conversation with Sarah Warner about vagus nerve stimulation, wearables and nervous system regulation, I wanted to look more closely at what polyvagal theory actually means and why it is so relevant for ex-boarders and trauma survi...
• Why Criticism Feels So Painful for Ex-Boarders 06.05.2026 16min

  In this episode, I explore why criticism can feel so painful for those of us who went to boarding school. For many ex-boarders, criticism does not simply feel like feedback. It can feel like danger. It can activate old patterns of shame, fear, compliance, dissociation or defensiveness. I reflect on boarding school conditioning, the fear of getting things wrong, Nick Duffell’s work on wounded leaders, David Cameron’s response to criticism, Rick Hanson’s “Velcro for negativity and Teflon for po...
• Music Therapy, Boarding School Trauma & Healing Through Connection | Helen Odell-Miller | AEM #159 01.05.2026 1h 2min

  In Episode 159 of An Evolving Man Podcast, I’m joined by Professor Helen Odell-Miller OBE, one of the UK’s leading pioneers in music therapy. Helen has spent decades working with trauma, attachment, mental health and emotional healing through music. She also worked closely with the late Joy Schaverien, whose work on boarding school syndrome transformed the conversation around early separation and institutional trauma. In this episode we explore: What music therapy is and how it works&nb...
• Does Boarding School Create Resilience… or Dissociation? 29.04.2026 18min

  Many boarding schools claim they build resilience. But what if what they often create is something else entirely? In this episode, I explore the difference between true resilience and dissociation, and why so many ex-boarders struggle with relationships, emotional regulation, connection and rest later in life. Drawing on the work of Barbara Fredrickson, Emma Seppälä, Joy Schaverien, Nick Duffell and others, I share: Why becoming “bulletproof” is not resilience How trauma narr...
• Crowds & Power at Boarding School | Why We Joined In (And How to Forgive Ourselves) | Piers Cross 27.04.2026 12min

  In this episode, I explore the powerful influence of crowds and group behaviour, particularly within boarding school environments. Why do people join in when someone is being shamed or targeted? Why does it happen so quickly — and often without conscious thought? Drawing on Elias Canetti’s Crowds and Power and modern neuroscience around mirror neurons, this episode looks at how emotional contagion shapes behaviour — and why many of us still carry guilt or shame about those moments. This...
• Third Culture Kid, Boarding School Survivor, Humanitarian | Peter Sykes’ Powerful Story | AEM #158 17.04.2026 1h 10min

  In Episode 158 of An Evolving Man Podcast, I’m joined by Peter Sykes — humanitarian, strategist, writer and author of Somewhere Never Home. Peter has led major humanitarian responses across the world, but in this conversation we explore the deeply personal side of his story. We talk about growing up as a third culture kid, being sent to boarding school at age 10, identity loss, addiction, achievement, emotional suppression, and the long path of healing. This is an honest, moving and hopeful c...
• The Loss of Identity at Boarding School | Shame, Conformity & Healing 15.04.2026 14min

  In this short solo episode, I reflect on one of the deepest impacts of boarding school: The loss of identity. What happens when children learn that their name, hobbies, feelings and individuality are not safe? Drawing on my recent conversation with Peter Sykes, I explore how institutional environments shape children into survival personalities — the complier, the rebel or the crushed child. We also look at why many adults later struggle to know what they truly want, and how we can begin recon...