Before You Kill Yourself: a suicide prevention podcast.

Epizody

• 4 A.M. and the Miracle of Love 29.06.2026 29min

  In this episode, I reflect on James Baldwin’s powerful insight that “a human being can only be saved by another human being,” and why 4 a.m. can be one of the most dangerous times to be alone with our thoughts. I explore how love, connection, and even the quiet presence of others can help us recognize that our lives are deeply intertwined—and that simply staying alive may be the greatest gift we give to the people around us.Why emotional pain often feels most overwhelming in the middle of the nightWhat Baldwin meant by “the miracle of love”Why drugs, alcohol, work, and distraction can soothe us but cannot truly save usHow Martin Short’s grandchildren gave him a reason to keep goingThe ripple effect of our lives on partners, family, friends, and strangersHow we influence one another through our habits, consistency, and simple presencePractical questions to ask yourself when you’re struggling at 4 a.m.Thrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• Celebrating our flops, failures and f*ck-ups 22.06.2026 17min

  In this episode, I explore why failure is not something to hide, but something to study, share, and even celebrate. Drawing inspiration from the “Flops” exhibition at the Musée des Arts et Métiers, I look at how psychology, religion, science, and art all reveal the same truth: my mistakes are often the very things that shape my character, deepen my relationships, and point me toward a more meaningful life.Why failed products like BIC for Her and New Coke can teach us about resilienceThe psychology of growth mindset, self-compassion, and learning from mistakesHow traditions like Kintsugi and teshuvah honor repair over perfectionStories of famous failures from Thomas Edison to J.K. RowlingBooks, movies, songs, and poems that remind us to “fail better”Reflection questions to help me turn every flop into wisdom and purposeThrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• The Story Is More Valuable Than the Footage 15.06.2026 24min

  When a hard drive crashes, people will spend thousands—or even hundreds of thousands—of dollars to recover what they thought was lost. In this episode, I explore what data recovery can teach us about resilience, meaning, and suicide prevention.In this episode, I discuss:Why we often don’t realize the value of something until it’s goneHow our bodies, relationships, and memories are more fragile than we thinkThe surprising parallels between data recovery specialists and suicide hotline counselorsHow a single grain of dust—or a single thought—can cause outsized damageWhy emotional crises are often about imbalance rather than total failureThe idea that the story we create from loss may be more valuable than what we lostArticle referenced: https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2026/04/27/when-your-digital-life-vanishesThrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• How to vent 08.06.2026 20min

  Typically, when we vent, it causes more harm than good. How do we vent our emotions in a healthy way?Thrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• How to have a gardener mindset for suicide prevention 01.06.2026 18min

  "Eat the apple. Plant the seeds." How does this quote pertain to suicide prevention?Thrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• The Drake Passage: Staying on the Ship When the Waves Hit 25.05.2026 14min

  What do you do when your mind feels like the Drake Passage—violent, unpredictable, and overwhelming? In this episode, we break down what it actually takes to survive extreme conditions, both at sea and in your mental health.This isn’t about powering through. It’s about learning how to stay on the ship.What We Cover:Why the Drake Passage is so brutal—and why no one is surprised by itThe myth of “toughing it out” vs. adjusting to real conditionsHow tools like meclizine and scopolamine parallel mental health supportThe “stay low and hold on” strategy for emotional survivalBreaking overwhelming time into manageable momentsWhy asking for help isn’t weakness—it’s survivalThe core mindset shift: you don’t have to control the waves, just don’t go overboardThrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• Burnout: How to stay connected to what you love 18.05.2026 24min

  What do you do when depression and burnout disconnect you from the very things that once made you feel alive? In this episode, I explore why progress alone isn’t enough—we need rest, play, and purpose to reconnect with ourselves and remember what makes life worth living.Key Takeaways:Depression often shows up as anhedonia—the inability to feel pleasure from things you still care about.Like my dog Mila, we can keep “walking” through life but still need play to avoid becoming restless and emotionally depleted.Action often comes before motivation; reconnecting starts with small acts of contact.A sustainable life requires a balance of rest, play, and purpose.Hope can sound as simple as: “I want to be here long enough to find out.”Thrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• How to pour into self 11.05.2026 18min

  We give, give, and give some more. How do we give back to ourselves?Thrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• SPOILERS: DEVIL WEARS PRADA 2 11.05.2026 21min

  In this episode, I use The Devil Wears Prada and its sequel to explore the mental health costs of ambition, the hidden support systems that help us succeed, and how to pursue excellence without sacrificing our relationships, identity, and sense of self.Visionary vs. vendorAmbition and burnoutWants vs. needsThe cost of successHidden mentors (“Nigels”)Mixed motives and self-honestyPrint vs. digital attentionSuccess without losing yourselfThrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• How to resist the urge to blow my life up 04.05.2026 20min

  There's something seductive about starting over. Blowing our lives up seems like a great way to do it. How do we resist that urge?Thrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• Madeline Vosch - Undead: A Memoir of My Suicide 28.04.2026 49min

  Today we talk to Madeline Vosch, author of "Undead: A Memoir of My Suicide." We discuss: complicated truths of surviving a suiciderethinking concept of suicide preventionhow access to basic needs keeps people aliveThrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• How to stay sane when the price of everything is going up 20.04.2026 22min

  A real-time look at what it feels like when everyday costs jump overnight—and how I keep my footing when the math stops working.Key Points:Prices rising faster than paychecks creates emotional, not just financial, strainThe difference between failing and being squeezed by the systemShifting from convenience to control (small, practical swaps)Stabilizing mindset: survive first, optimize laterSeparating self-worth from financial pressureFinding leverage: negotiate, share, and speak upThrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• Interrupting thoughts vs suppressing emotions 13.04.2026 12min

  This episode explores the difference between interrupting thoughts and suppressing emotions—and how trying to control what we feel can quietly keep us stuck. I share how I’ve learned to stop feeding the mental loop while still allowing emotions to move, instead of shutting them down.Why interrupting thoughts can accidentally suppress emotionsThe hidden ways we avoid feeling (and why they backfire)How to let emotions exist without making them biggerA simple, real-time process for breaking ruminationThe shift from controlling feelings → allowing them to moveThrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• Don't compare and despair - study! 06.04.2026 5min

  In this episode, I break down the difference between comparing and studying — and why one leads to despair while the other leads to growth. We’re going to talk about how comparison quietly attacks your identity, and how to shift into a mindset that builds strategy instead of shame.In this episode:Why “comparison leads to despair” is psychologically trueThe difference between ranking yourself and studying patternsHow comparison turns into identity damageWhy studying others builds skill without shrinking your self-worthA simple mindset shift you can use immediatelyStop asking, “Where do I rank?” Start asking, “What can I learn?”Thrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• Leading through anxiety and depression 30.03.2026 11min

  In this episode, I reflect on my time leading a cottage at a group home and how stepping into a leadership role challenged my identity, anxiety, and desire to just be the “fun guy.” I unpack the psychological shift from being liked to being responsible, and how consistent structure reduced chaos, stress, and mental overload — ultimately allowing me to lead with both authority and warmth.Why I initially hated being in charge despite caring deeply about the kids and staffThe internal conflict between being the fun, relational leader vs. enforcing rules and boundariesHow anxiety, rumination, and self-doubt intensify in leadership rolesThe realization that structure (being “the law”) creates the conditions for fun and connectionHow consistency and staff alignment helped the environment run itself over timeWhy silence, avoidance, and unclear expectations increase stress for everyoneA key reframe: you may not hate leadership — you may hate unstructured chaosPractical takeaway: clarity, consistency, and support reduce mental load and make leadership sustainableThrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• Are you "touch starved?" 16.03.2026 18min

  In this episode, I talk about what it really means to be touch starved — not in a dramatic way, but in a nervous-system way. I break down why safe, consensual touch matters for our mental health and how we can get more of it in simple, intentional ways.What “touch starved” actually meansWhy lack of touch increases stress and anxietyHow we used to experience touch vs. nowSmall, practical ways to get healthy touchThe surprising ways people try to replace itAre you stressed… or do you just need a hug?Thrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• BYKY is going on hiatus 22.02.2026 9min

  I’m taking a short hiatus from the podcast to rest and reset. In the meantime, I encourage you to stay connected to at least one person, keep a small daily routine, and revisit the few episodes that truly helped you instead of consuming everything at once.Build a simple support list, do one meaningful thing each week, and please reach out to professional or crisis support if you’re struggling — this podcast is support, not a substitute for care.I’ll be back soon. And more importantly, I want you to be here when I return.Thrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• Why “They’d Be Better Off Without Me” Is a Distortion, Not a Truth 16.02.2026 23min

  When someone says, “Everyone would be better off without me,” it sounds selfless — but what if it’s a distortion built on the wrong currency of worth? In this episode, we unpack the hidden assumptions behind that belief, from perceived burdensomeness to shame, control, and the quiet fear of being irredeemable.Why “better” is often measured by productivity, not meaningHow depression turns imagination into certaintyThe difference between removal and redemptionThrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• Scapegoat: Why Families Need a Fall Guy 09.02.2026 26min

  What does it mean to feel like the outsider in your own family — the one who gets blamed, ignored, or quietly cast as “the problem”? In this episode, we explore the psychology of scapegoating, why families assign roles, and how to stop seeking validation from a system that may never give it. It’s about moving from exile to self-acceptance — and building belonging on your own terms.In This Episode:What family scapegoating actually is (and why it happens)The emotional cost of being “the identified problem”How family systems protect themselves — not necessarily the truthThe difference between alienation and individuationGrieving the family you hoped forFinding acceptance without needing unanimous approvalThrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.
• The truth about loneliness, depression and despair 02.02.2026 32min

  Is the real crisis today economic — or architectural? In this episode, we challenge the idea that loneliness and despair come from a broken ladder of upward mobility. What if the problem isn’t that we can’t climb… but that we were taught to measure our worth by climbing in the first place? Drawing from Middlemarch, modern work culture, and personal experience, this conversation explores why craftsmanship, authorship, and daily building may be the antidote to vertical despair.In this episode:Why the “career ladder” mindset fuels anxiety and comparisonThe difference between climbing and buildingHow craftsmanship creates internal pride (and hunger)What Lydgate’s crisis in Middlemarch teaches us about collapsed ambitionWhy being seen — not promoted — can save a lifeThe power of asking: “Am I actually in danger right now?”Moving from passive consumption to generative actionHow to build meaning even when the system feels unstableThrive With Leo Coaching: If you want to reduce your psychological pain, regain your purpose and forge your own path, go to www.thrivewithleo.com to begin your journey.If you or anyone you know is considering suicide or self-harm, or is anxious, depressed, upset, or needs to talk, there are people who want to help:In the US: Crisis Text Line: Text CRISIS to 741741 for free, confidential crisis counseling. The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 or 988The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386Outside the US:International Association for Suicide Prevention lists a number of suicide hotlines by country. Click here to find them.