The Divorce Course Podcast

Episodios

• When & How Can You Make a Settlement Offer in Divorce for Parenting or Property - Step by Step 03.06.2026 55m

  🎧 Listen if you're wondering when you can make an offer, you've received one that floored you, you feel pressured to "be the reasonable one," your ex is high-conflict or controlling, or you've been told you have to go to mediation first. ⚠️ General information only, not legal advice Australian family law. Always consult a family lawyer. 🛟 Discusses coercive control & legal/financial abuse.  Support: 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732). ⏱️ Episode Timeline 00:00 – What Is an Offer in a Divorce?  01:50 – What an Offer Really Is (and What Counteroffers Are) 02:30 – Do You Need a Lawyer to Make an Offer? 03:30 – Why Emotional, People-Pleasing Offers Backfire 04:30 – What You Need Before You Make an Offer: Your Property Pool 05:00 – Future Needs, Super vs Cash  06:00 – Knowing What You're Giving Up With Eyes Wide Open 07:00 – Rushed & Blindsided Offers: 08:00 –  Buying Time Before You Agree 09:00 – Can You Get Out of Something You Signed Under Pressure? 10:30 – When Can You Make an Offer? Anytime You're Informed 12:30 – The Best Time to Make Your First Offer & Saving Legal Fees 13:50 – The Mediation Myth: You Don't Have to Go 15:40 – Why People Only Get Realistic at Mediation 17:00 – Time-Limited Offers: Pressure, Deadlines & the Downside 20:00 – Standing Offers:  22:00 – Do Offers Work in Parenting  24:30 – Calderbank Offers & Section 114UB Explained 25:50 – Offer Strategy for an Avoidant Ex 28:30 – Offer Strategy for a High-Conflict "Yeah, But" Ex 31:20 – Offer Strategy for an Amicable Ex & Collaborative Law 36:20 – Can You Offer Directly to Your Ex While Lawyers Are Engaged? 37:00 – Making Offers to a Narcissistic or Controlling Ex 39:00 – Don't Feed the Reaction: Grey Rock & Shuttle Negotiation 41:50 – What to Do When You Get a Bad Offer 42:50 – Ambit Claims & the Central Practice Direction 44:00 – Ask for the Authorities: Turning a Bad Offer to Your Advantage 46:30 – The Consequences of Refusing a Reasonable Offer 48:50 – Genuine Steps, Compulsory Offers & Costs Protection 50:00 – Why Offers Stay Hidden From the Judge Until the End     Calderbank Offers & Costs —    • Costs, Family Court and Calderbank Offers ...   Can You Really Mediate With a Narcissist? —    • Mediation and negotiation tips for divorci...     — www.thedivorcecourse.com.au Enrol (DIY Divorce Blueprint, AU) — www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/enrol 
• Do I really need a lawyer for my Divorce or DeFacto Separation? 25.05.2026 37m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if… You're wondering if you actually need a lawyer for your divorce at all You're worried that spending too much now means you can't afford court later You're scared that "lawyering up" will make your ex worse You think it's all-or-nothing and want to know the middle ground Your ex is high-conflict, avoidant, controlling, or amicable and you need a strategy that fits ⚠️ Legal Disclaimer This podcast is general information only it is not legal advice. It reflects Australian family law and may not apply to your situation. Always consult a qualified family lawyer about your circumstances. Laws may have changed since recording. Most people think there are only two options when it comes to lawyers in a divorce hand everything over, or go it completely alone. But that's not the truth, and believing it can cost you thousands. In this episode, Laura and Lyn break down the three ways you can actually use a lawyer. Then they get into what nobody talks about how your divorce personality type should completely change how you use a lawyer. A manipulative and controlling ex who runs up your fees needs a very different strategy to an avoidant ex who panics at a law firm's letterhead This isn't an episode telling you to avoid lawyers. It's about using them strategically for the parts where legal expertise genuinely matters, and not for the parts that just drain your property pool. 00:00 – Do You Need a Lawyer for Divorce? The Big Myth 01:40 – The All-or-Nothing Lawyer Myth & Talking About Costs 03:00 – Why Spending Too Much on Lawyers Early Can Backfire 04:00 – The 2 Critical Times You MUST See a Lawyer 05:00 – Why Seeing a Lawyer Early Bursts Unrealistic Expectations 06:20 – Before You Sign: Why a Lawyer's Eye Matters 08:20 – The 3 Ways to Use a Lawyer: The First-Class Ride 09:50 – The 3 Ways to Use a Lawyer: Step In, Step Out 11:20 – Divorce Personality Types: Manipulative & Controlling 12:50 – Using Your Lawyer Strategically Against Fee-Running Tactics 15:00 – Should You Take a Lawyer or Barrister to Mediation? 17:00 – Divorce Personality Types: High Conflict 19:00 – Divorce Personality Types: The Avoidant Ex 21:30 – Divorce Personality Types: The Amicable Ex 23:40 – Project-Managing Your Lawyer & the Addario & Addario Case 26:00 – Why Understanding the Process Stops Panic Spending 33:00 – The Middle Way + Legal Aid & Community Legal Services 34:00 – The DIY Divorce Blueprint & Sign-Off 🎧 Episodes  How Much Does Getting Divorced Actually Cost? — https://youtu.be/x-sgBNjlTHo?si=ubdIhcS1mjSrQqEk Bombarded With Legal Letters — https://youtu.be/z11Id8YdQn4?si=ucYfGThRuRcFYoH6 Mediation or Manipulation? — https://youtu.be/cmcFWXD2EBs?si=BMV5KY4CquSx1_dN Do You Need to Take a Lawyer to Mediation? — https://youtu.be/GB2lJftxdh4?si=vNwQueYHJhFrY3aP Community Legal Services: How to Use Them — https://youtu.be/4sEUhu6r07Q?si=1oYsGQ3vF1Eb2Y4M 📚 Links & Resources 📞 1800 RESPECT — 1800 737 732 (24/7 DV support) 📞 Lifeline — 13 11 14 🚓 Police — 000 (immediate danger) 🌐 The Divorce Course — www.thedivorcecourse.com.au 🎓 The DIY Divorce Blueprint — enrolments open until 10 June 2026 (click "Enroll Now") 💌 If this episode helped you understand how to use a lawyer wisely – and where you can save thousands – please follow, rate, review, and share The Divorce Course Podcast so others going through the same thing can find it too.
• How Much Does Divorce Actually Cost? Legal Fees, Mediation & Hidden Expenses 19.05.2026 51m

  🎧 Listen to This Episode If… You want a real, plain-English breakdown of divorce process fees You're terrified to leave because you've heard divorce costs hundreds of thousands of dollars Your ex is telling you "leave the lawyers out of it" and you're not sure if they're right You've already started racking up legal fees and you're wondering where it's all going You want to understand exactly what you can do yourself versus what you actually need a lawyer for You're heading into mediation and don't know if you need a barrister too ⚠️ Legal Disclaimer This podcast is general information only – it is not legal advice. The content reflects Australian family law. Always consult a qualified family lawyer. fees may have changed since this episode was recorded (figures quoted reflect May 2026 pricing). This isn't an episode designed to scare you. Laura and Lyn walk you through where you have control, where you can save thousands by doing the work yourself,  00:00 – The Real Cost of Divorce: Why Some Pay $4K and Others $300K 02:36 – The Big Three Fears 04:14 – How Much Does a Divorce Application Actually Cost?  06:35 – Why Lawyers Charge for "Accepting Service" 08:01 – Negotiation Costs:  11:00 – Hourly Rates in 2026: 12:30 – The Cost of Phone Calls, Reviewing Offers & Meetings 14:30 – How Much to Draft Consent Orders 16:00 – Disclosure: The Biggest Budget Blowout in Divorce 19:00 – Paralegal Rates vs Lawyer Rates: Don't Overpay 20:30 – Drip-Feeding vs Dumping Disclosure 23:30 – Mediation Costs 24:50 – Do You Need a Barrister at Mediation? 27:00 – Half-Day vs Full-Day Mediation 29:30 – Hidden Costs 32:30 – The Court's Scale of Fees vs What Lawyers Actually Charge 33:30 – How Sending Late-Night Emails Costs You 34:30 – How People Waste Money 35:30 – Fighting Over Furniture, Revenge Litigation & Lawyer-as-Therapist 36:30 – Stubbornness, Unrealistic Expectations & Knowing When to Let Go 37:30 – Family Law Doesn't Deliver Justice or Retribution 39:00 – How Much to File Consent Orders ($205 Court Fee) 41:00 – How to Be Smart: When to Use a Lawyer and When Not To 41:30 – Saving Thousands on Disclosure by Doing It Yourself 43:00 – The One Meeting Strategy: Walk In Prepared, Walk Out Saving $10K 46:00 – Who Pays for Legal Fees? Section 114UB Explained 47:30 – Fee Exemptions, Cost Agreements & What to Expect 49:30 – Laura's Confession: The Bag of Receipts Story 🎧 Episodes Mentioned in This Episode 1. How to Choose a Mediator (Free vs Private Mediation) https://youtu.be/HKda6QswjAE?si=R27SD6WSDiLiI3VA 2. Do You Need a Lawyer for Mediation? https://youtu.be/GB2lJftxdh4?si=ur8ZMCkzPQ9dYFZN 3. Furniture in Divorce: How to Deal With It Without Blowing Your Budgethttps://youtu.be/oZ5h-gxckXU 4. Consent Orders Explained https://youtu.be/-DC72tq8FRM 🎟️ Free Webinar — Register at www.thedivorcecourse.com.au (click "Reserve My Seat") Family Law Act 1975 – Section 114UB (each party bears their own costs) https://www.austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/legis/cth/consol_act/fla1975114/ https://www.fcfcoa.gov.au/fl/costs https://www.fcfcoa.gov.au/fl/pubs/legal-costs The Divorce Course Disclosure Checklist —https://www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/disclosure_checklist_o
• How to Choose the Right Mediator for Your Divorce (Without Getting Played) 13.05.2026 41m

  🎧 Listen to This Episode If… You've been told you have to go to mediation and you don't know where to start Your ex has already chosen a mediator and something feels off You can't afford the expensive mediator your ex is pushing for You're going through family violence and worried no mediator will take your matter You don't know the difference between free mediation and private mediation You want to know whether your mediator actually needs to be a lawyer ⚠️ Legal Disclaimer This podcast is general information only it is not legal advice. The content reflects Australian family law and may not apply to your specific situation or jurisdiction. Always consult a qualified family lawyer about your individual circumstances. Laws may have changed since this episode was recorded. 🛟 Family Violence Trigger Warning This episode discusses family violence and the challenges of mediating where there is a history of abuse, coercion, or control. If you or someone you know is in danger, call 000. For confidential support: 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732). Episode Summary You don't have to accept whichever mediator gets put in front of you. In this episode, Laura and Mum (family law accredited specialist Lynette Galvin) unpack one of the most under-discussed parts of separation how to actually choose a good mediator, and how to push back when the one your ex is suggesting doesn't feel right. They cover the difference between free mediation (Relationships Australia, Interrelate, CentreCare) and private mediation, when you need an FDRP (Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner) versus when you don't, and whether your mediator really needs to be a lawyer or a former judge. Mum shares the exact wording she uses in letters when the other side proposes a biased or unaffordable mediator  including the "panel of three" approach that keeps the process fair. There's also an honest conversation about the gap in the system for people experiencing family violence, where mediators often refuse to take the matter on leaving survivors stuck heading to court when mediation could have solved the issue. Laura and Mum talk about what to look for in a mediator brave enough to handle high-conflict matters, and the practical safety steps (separate rooms, video links, safe exits) you can ask about. And there's the reminder you might need most: you hold the cards. You don't have to agree to anything in mediation just because you've been pushed to. You can pause, walk away, and come back when you're ready. ⏱️ Episode Timeline 00:00 – How to Choose a Mediator: Why It Matters More Than You Think 01:00 – Legal Disclaimer & Why Mum Is a Qualified Mediator 01:40 – Can the Mediator Make or Break Your Mediation? 02:30 – How Lawyers Choose Mediators (And Their "Bottom of the Barrel" List) 03:40 – Can You Speak to a Mediator Before Choosing? Why Mum Says No 04:20 – How to Use Google Reviews to Vet a Mediator 05:30 – What Qualifications a Mediator Should Have (FDRP Explained) 07:00 – Does Your Mediator Need to Be a Lawyer? Property vs Children 08:30 – Why Social Workers Often Make the Best Children's Mediators 09:30 – Mediation and Family Violence: The Gap in the System 12:20 – Can You Change Mediators Halfway Through? The Honest Answer 13:50 – Red Flags: Biased, Agenda-Driven and "In Cahoots" Mediators 16:00 – When the Mediator's Office Is Next Door to Your Ex's Lawyer 17:00 – How to Push Back Without Slandering the Mediator 18:30 – What to Do If Your Ex Picks an Expensive Mediator You Can't Afford 19:30 – Free Mediation Options: Relationships Australia, Interrelate, CentreCare 20:20 – How Much Does a Private Mediator Cost? ($5K–$6K Reality Check) 21:30 – Why Free Services Have Long Wait Lists (And When to Go Private) 22:30 – The "Panel of Three" Letter Strategy You Can Use Today 24:00 – Should You Pay More If Your Case Is Serious? 24:50 – Free Mediation Pros and Cons (And Why Parenting Plans Aren't Enforceable) 27:40 – Private Mediators: Former Judges, Barristers and the "Iron Fist in Velvet Glove" 29:30 – Facilitative vs Evaluative vs Pure Mediation Styles Explained 31:30 – Can You Ask the Mediator If You're Getting a Good Deal? No. 32:30 – Pressure to Sign on the Day: How to Push Back 33:40 – Mediation Is Like a Boat in the Ocean — Pick Wisely 35:30 – How to Write the "Panel of Three" Letter to Your Ex 36:30 – Best Mediator Style by Ex Personality Type 38:30 – If You're Amicable, You Might Not Need Mediation At All 39:30 – You Hold the Cards: Don't Be Bullied Into an Agreement 🎧 Episodes Mentioned in This Episode  What Actually Happens Inside a Mediation - https://open.spotify.com/episode/2BvkcVNcHNrdWmXALC6bsA?si=31f56fce3c8d48a6 What a divorce mediator wish you knew  - https://open.spotify.com/episode/4zeUIkV3O5LTQAHi0dXOGL?si=644698cb744647a8 📚 Links & Resources 📞 1800 RESPECT — 1800 737 732 (24/7 DV support) 📞 Lifeline — 13 11 14 🚓 Police — 000 (immediate danger) 🌐 The Divorce Course — www.thedivorcecourse.com.au 🎓 The Divorce Course Podcast — www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/blog   Find an Accredited FDRP (Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner): Attorney-General's Department — https://www.ag.gov.au/families-and-marriage/family-dispute-resolution Free / Low-Cost Mediation Services: Relationships Australia — https://www.relationships.org.au Interrelate — https://www.interrelate.org.au CentreCare — https://centacare.com Find a Family Law Accredited Specialist or Mediator: Queensland Law Society — https://www.qls.com.au Bar Association of Queensland — https://www.qldbar.asn.au (Or your state's equivalent Law Society / Bar Association) The Divorce Course Free Webinar: www.thedivorcecourse.com.au — click "Reserve My Seat" Closing CTA If this episode helped you understand how to choose a mediator who'll actually work for you, please follow, rate, review, and share The Divorce Course Podcast so others heading into mediation can find this information too. All our best, Laura & Lyn Your Guides By Your Side Co-Hosts of THE DIVORCE COURSE PODCAST  
• Is Your Ex Wasting the Property Pool? Here's What the Family Court Does Now 05.05.2026 40m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if… You've been told "add-backs are dead" by your lawyer or your ex Your ex is wasting the property pool and you don't know how to stop it You've watched assets disappear since separation bank accounts, cars, super You're heading into mediation and need to know what to argue You want to understand what  the Shinohara & Shinohara Case and Shamon & Sharon Case actually mean for your case You're worried about delay tactics while your ex quietly drains the joint money ⚠️ Legal Disclaimer This podcast is general information only – it is not legal advice. The content reflects Australian family law and may not apply to your specific situation or jurisdiction. Always consult a qualified family lawyer about your individual circumstances. Laws may have changed since this episode was recorded. Episode Summary You may have heard the rumour – "add-backs are dead." Lawyers are quoting it, ex-partners are using it as an excuse, and people are panicking that there's nothing they can do when the property pool is being drained. In this episode, Laura and Mum unpack what add-backs actually are, why people think they've disappeared, and what the courts are really doing about wastage now. The short answer? Add-backs aren't on the balance sheet anymore  but wastage is absolutely still considered. Thanks to Shinohara & Shinohara [2025], the courts have stopped putting "imaginary money" into the property pool. But thanks to Section 79(5)(d) of the Family Law Act and the case of Shamon & Shamon [2025], wastage now adjusts the percentage split of what's left – and in Shamon, that meant the wife walked away with nearly 100% of the property pool plus costs. Mum walks through what counts as wastage (selling assets cheap, gambling, blowing money post-separation, gifting funds to a new partner), what doesn't (post-separation income spent on living, ordinary marital spending), and how to protect the property pool before your ex empties it. She also explains exactly what to consider saying if a lawyer or mediator quotes Shinohara at you including the section number, the case names, and the strategy that works. If you suspect your ex is wasting money or stalling property settlement, this is the episode to listen to before you do anything else. ⏱️ Episode Timeline 00:00 – Are Add-Backs Dead? The Property Pool Myth Going Around 01:00 – Legal Disclaimer & Australian Family Law Context 01:30 – What Is an Add-Back in Property Settlement? 03:15 – The Townsend Case: How Add-Backs Used to Work 04:25 – Property Pool vs Balance Sheet: What's the Difference? 05:25 – The 4 Steps of Property Settlement Explained 05:50 – Why People Think Add-Backs Are Dead: Shinohara Explained 07:15 – "Don't Put Pretend Money on the Balance Sheet" 07:55 – The Real Risk: Ex Spending Everything Before Settlement 08:45 – How Wastage Is Handled Now: Section 79(5)(d) 10:00 – Percentage Adjustments Instead of Balance Sheet Add-Backs 11:30 – The Shamon Case: Wife Got Nearly 100% Plus Costs 13:50 – What to Do If Your Ex Has Already Drained the Pool 14:30 – How to Protect the Property Pool: Caveats Explained 17:00 – Protecting Joint Bank Accounts and Cash 17:50 – Superannuation, Cars and Other Assets 19:50 – Arguing Wastage in Mediation (Not Court) 21:00 – How to Respectfully Tell Your Lawyer They're Wrong 24:30 – Free Webinar Reminder 24:40 – What to Write to Your Ex Before Settlement 26:25 – What Counts as Wastage: Kowaliw, Gambling & More 27:30 – Is Drinking and Drug Use Considered Wastage? 28:15 – Gifts to a New Partner: The Gollings & Scott Case 29:30 – Reckless Spending vs Ordinary Spending 30:15 – Bad Business Decisions Post-Separation 31:10 – So Are Add-Backs Dead? The Final Answer 32:30 – What Evidence You Need to Prove Wastage 33:50 – The Mechanism Has Changed, the Outcome Hasn't 34:25 – Your Toolkit: Section 79(5)(d) of the Family Law Act, Shamon, Townsend, Weir 35:30 – Why Acting Fast Matters in Financial Abuse 36:55 – Reviewer of the Month: Manal from Australia 38:30 – Final Thoughts: Wastage Rules   🎧 Episodes Mentioned in This Episode 1. Equalisation of Super: The Myth That Won't Die https://youtu.be/YFkOnEsNybw?si=LAQd2SUq_YRVl9Ts 3. The Gilded Cage: Delay Tactics in Property Settlement https://youtu.be/cs6-jHDt-Qk?si=ufuSLLwVmasbQKsL 4. Financial Abuse and Hidden Assets https://youtu.be/D3-fV8C4gkM?si=JQMk6eqMXWUktsUf 📚 Links & Resources 📞 1800 RESPECT — 1800 737 732 (24/7 support) 📞 Lifeline — 13 11 14 🚓 Police — 000 (immediate danger) 🌐 The Divorce Course — www.thedivorcecourse.com.au 🎓 The Divorce Course Podcast — www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/blog 🎟️ Free Webinar — www.thedivorcecourse.com.au (click "Reserve My Seat") Cases Mentioned Shinohara & Shinohara [2025] — the case people are misreading  https://www.austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/cases/cth/FedCFamC1A/2025/126.html Shamon & Shamon [2025] — https://www.austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/cases/cth/FedCFamC1A/2025/150.html Townsend & Townsend — the original add-back case (the taxi) Weir & Weir — the quarry / missing gravel case Kowaliw & Kowaliw [1981] — the trashed family home case Gollings & Scott — the engagement ring / post-separation income case Legislation Family Law Act 1975 — Section 79(4), Section 79(5)(d) — https://www.austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/legis/cth/consol_act/fla1975114/s79.html Family Law Act 1975 — Section 90SM (de facto equivalent) If this episode helped you understand wastage and feel ready to push back when someone says "add-backs are dead," please follow, rate, review, and share The Divorce Course Podcast so others going through the same thing can find this information too. All our best, Laura & Lyn Your Guides By Your Side Co-Hosts of THE DIVORCE COURSE PODCAST
• Coercive Control & Domestic Violence in Family Court: Should You Raise It or Stay Silent? 29.04.2026 50m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if: You want to understand if domestic violence can affect your property or parenting outcome You've been told by a lawyer to "leave the family violence out" of your case You're scared raising coercive control or domestic violence will backfire on you in mediation You're confused by social media saying the courts ignore family violence Your ex is still using coercive behaviour even after separation You're heading into mediation or court and don't know how to bring it up   ⚠️ Legal Disclaimer & Family Violence Trigger Warning This episode contains discussion of family violence, coercive control, post-separation abuse, and the impact of these behaviours on children, which may be distressing for some listeners. If you are unsafe or experiencing family violence, please reach out for support. Support is available in Australia: 📞 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732   📞 Lifeline – 13 11 14   🚨 In an emergency, call 000 This podcast provides general educational information about Australian family law only and is not legal advice. Laura is not a lawyer. Every situation is different, and you should seek independent professional guidance tailored to your circumstances.  Episode Summary Should you bring up coercive control and domestic violence in your family law case… or will it backfire? If you've been online lately, you've probably seen wildly different opinions. Some people insist the courts ignore family violence completely. Others say the system is finally taking it seriously. And then there are the lawyers quietly telling clients to "just leave it out so we can settle." So who's right? In this episode, Mum and I unpack how coercive control and domestic violence are actually treated in Australian family law right now and the recent appeal cases that show the courts are starting to listen. We walk through real 2023 and 2024 decisions including Burnell & Rockford, Lainhart & Elinson, Dejani & Dejani, and Sad & Raymond cases your lawyer may not have caught up with yet. We talk about Section 4AB, Section 75, and Section 79 of the Family Law Act, why mediators sometimes forget you're still being coercively controlled while sitting across from your ex, and the very real "peace at any price" trap that costs people thousands in their settlement. If you've been silenced, dismissed, or told it's not worth raising  this episode is for you. ⏱️ Episode Timeline 00:00  –  Coercive Control & Domestic Violence in Family Court: Should You Raise It? 01:00  –  Meet Laura & Lynette: Family Law Mum & Daughter Duo 02:00  –  Trigger Warning & Legal Disclaimer (Australia & Overseas) 03:00  –  Why Social Media Gets Coercive Control So Wrong 04:00  –  Why Lawyers Tell Clients to Leave It Out (And Why It's Wrong) 05:00  –  Judge Best's Powerful Speech: "Soften Your Gaze" 06:00  –  Why Both Parents Having Issues Doesn't Mean Equal Blame 07:00  –  Section 4AB: The Family Violence Definition That Changed Everything 09:00  –  Why Courts Now MUST Consider Family Violence Allegations 10:00  –  The Old Kennon Case vs The New Law: What Changed 11:00  –  Choosing the Right Lawyer When Domestic Violence Is Involved 12:00  –  "Don't Raise It Or You Won't Settle" — The Lawyer Myth 13:00  –  When NOT to Mention Family Violence in Property Mediation 14:00  –  The Smarter Way to Negotiate Coercive Control in Mediation 16:00  –  Parenting Cases: Why You MUST Raise Family Violence 17:00  –  Lainhart & Elinson 2023: The Appeal Case Every Mum Should Know 18:00  –  Section 60CC: Safety of Children Now Comes First 19:00  –  Why Parents Don't Tell Lawyers the Full Truth (And Why You Must) 20:00  –  Coercive Control in Parenting Cases Explained 21:00  –  Counselling Orders: When the Court Mistakes Lip Service for Change 23:00  –  False Alienation Claims: The New Coercive Control Tactic 24:00  –  50/50 Is No Longer the Default — Here's What Replaced It 26:00  –  Free Divorce Webinar With Lynette (Family Law Specialist) 27:00  –  Property Settlement: How Domestic Violence Affects Your Percentage 28:00  –  Kennon & Kennon: The Original Family Violence Property Case 30:00  –  Dejani & Dejani: When a Child's Health Issue Was Hidden 32:00  –  Burnell & Rockford 2024: Coercive Control in Property Settlement 34:00  –  Financial Abuse and PIN Numbers: What the Court Decided 35:00  –  Why You Need These Cases at Your Mediation 37:00  –  How Lawyers Use Cases as Negotiation Leverage 38:00  –  Section 79 & Notice of Risk: The Mediation Framework 40:00  –  Adding Percentage in Mediation Without Saying Why 41:00  –  Why You Must Disclose Family Violence in Parenting Negotiations 43:00  –  Settlement vs Court: The 10 Questions You Should Ask Yourself 44:00  –  Why Mediators Forget You're Still Being Controlled 45:00  –  How to Prove Coercive Control: Affidavits That Stand Up 47:00  –  The Biggest Mistake: Peace at Any Price Mentality 48:00  –  Why Post-Separation Abuse Often Gets Worse 49:00  –  Don't Compromise on Children — Stand Your Ground 50:00  –  Final Thoughts: It's Their Shame, Not Yours 🎧 Episodes Mentioned in This Episode 1. How to Put Coercive Control Into Writing for Court https://youtu.be/SIyXCGXH5nw?si=-7tLxmBpVQb2dNOv 2. Is It Family Violence? A Walk Through the Family Law Act https://youtu.be/YCddFx9cs_Y?si=DbJU6ePYSxDZFrEn 3. Settling vs Going to Court: 10 Questions to Ask Yourself https://youtu.be/gYpW3znoY28?si=pdg6wWbjMWttMH94   📚 Cases Mentioned (Take These to Your Lawyer) Burnell & Rockford (2024) — Coercive control and financial abuse in property settlement https://austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/cases/cth/FedCFamC2F/2024/468.html Lainhart & Elinson (2023) — Full Court appeal, Deputy Chief Justice McClelland — family violence in parenting https://www.austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/cases/cth/FedCFamC1A/2023/200.html Dajani & Dajani [2025] FedCFamC1A 28 (26 February 2025) — Hidden health issues in children and the impact on contributions https://www.austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/cases/cth/FedCFamC1A/2025/28.html Sayed & Rehmann [2025] FedCFamC1A 145 (21 August 2025) — Family violence and property contributions https://www.austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/cases/cth/FedCFamC1A/2025/145.html Kennon & Kennon — The original family violence and property settlement case (Section 75) 📰 Resources Mentioned Article: "Judge urges profession to soften your gaze when dealing with domestic and family violence" — QLS Proctor, 27 March 2024 (Federal Circuit & Family Court Judge Hannah Cara Best) https://www.qlsproctor.com.au/2026/03/judge-urges-profession-to-soften-your-gaze-when-dealing-with-dfv/ Family Law Act 1975 — Sections 4AB, 60CC, 75, 79 https://www.austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/legis/cth/consol_act/fla1975114/s4ab.html 🆘 Links & Resources 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 (24/7 family violence support) Lifeline – 13 11 14 Emergency – 000 The Divorce Course – www.thedivorcecourse.com.au Free Webinar with Lynette (family law accredited specialist) — register at thedivorcecourse.com.au If this episode helped you feel braver about raising coercive control and domestic violence in your family law matter, please follow, rate, review, and share the podcast  it helps other people in coercively controlling situations find this information too. You are not alone, and you don't have to stay silent.  
• Divorce Money Mistakes: What Financial Planners Know That You Don't 22.04.2026 51m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if: You're about to go through property settlement in divorce You're focused on the percentage but unsure what it actually means You're dealing with complex finances (trusts, companies, super, shares) or Simple Property Settlement You want to avoid making a financial mistake that costs you years You're wondering whether to take the house, cash, super or investments   ⚖️ Legal Disclaimer & ⚠️ Family Violence Trigger Warning This episode contains discussion of family violence, coercive control, and financial control, which may be distressing for some listeners. If you are unsafe or need support: 📞 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 📞 Lifeline – 13 11 14 🚨 In an emergency, call 000 This podcast provides general educational information only and is not legal or financial advice. Please seek professional guidance tailored to your situation. Most people going through property settlement are focused on one thing… 👉 What percentage am I going to get? But here's what most people don't realise… Two people can walk away with the same 50/50 split  and end up in completely different financial positions. Because it's not just about the percentage… 👉 it's about what that percentage actually looks like in your life. In this episode, Mum and I sit down with financial planner Pedro Marin and break down the four key steps a financial planner takes during property settlement so you can avoid costly mistakes and actually set yourself up for your future. We talk about everything from figuring out what's in your property pool, to deciding how to structure your settlement, to planning your future and finally, making sure everything is actually set up properly after the deal is done. Because getting a settlement is one thing… 👉 making it work for your life is another. ⏱️ Episode Timeline 00:00 – Divorce Property Settlement: It's Not Just the Percentage 01:22 – Meet Financial Planner Pedro Marin 04:04 – Why Financial Planning Matters in Divorce 08:01 – Step 1: Mapping Your Property Pool in Divorce 10:46 – Trusts & Companies in Divorce Explained 12:46 – Step 2: How to Structure Your Property Settlement 15:41 – Cash vs Property vs Super vs Shares in Divorce 23:20 – Step 3: Planning Your Financial Future After Divorce 24:48 – Financial Advice Risks: What You Need to Know 25:32 – Setting Financial Goals After Separation 28:58 – When to Start Financial Planning in Divorce 32:41 – Using the Same Financial Planner as Your Ex 34:52 – Budgeting for Mediation & Property Settlement 37:30 – Step 4: Implementing Your Divorce Settlement 40:20 – Insurance, Risk & Protection After Divorce 43:49 – Wills, Estate Planning & Protecting Your Children 47:25 – Biggest Mistake: Emotional Decisions in Divorce 49:35 – How to Work With a Financial Planner (Pedro Marin) 51:19 – Final Takeaways & Legal Disclaimer 🎧 Additional Episodes Mentioned Weapons of Tax Destruction https://youtu.be/tsDlMphLRWk?si=1Fbpw7XJy9jxCK20 Living Arrangements: Should You Keep or Sell the House? https://youtu.be/wknV5CB90yY?si=HGwH5m1AtXba5k7G   🔗 Links & Resources 🌐 Marin Wealth: https://marinwealth.com.au/ 📥 Free Checklists: https://thedivorcecourse.com.au 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 Lifeline – 13 11 14 If this episode helped you think differently about your property settlement, make sure you follow, rate, review, and share the podcast — because someone else out there needs to hear this before they make a costly mistake.
• Furniture in Divorce: Who Gets What & Costly Mistakes to Avoid 15.04.2026 41m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if: You're arguing over furniture or household items in divorce Your ex has taken everything or won't give anything back You've been told "you can't take anything if you leave" You want to avoid wasting money on legal fees over small items You're trying to work out what's actually fair vs worth fighting for Legal Disclaimer & Family Violence Trigger Warning This episode contains discussion of family violence, coercive control, and separation dynamics, which may be distressing for some listeners. If you are unsafe, do not attempt to retrieve belongings alone. This podcast provides general educational information only and is not legal advice. Every situation is different, and you should seek independent professional guidance tailored to your circumstances. What happens to all the "stuff" when you separate? Everyone talks about the house, the bank accounts, and the kids… but no one really talks about the furniture, the appliances, the artwork  and yes, even the toilet brush. In this episode, Mum and I unpack what actually happens to household contents in a property settlement, and why these seemingly small things can end up causing some of the biggest fights. We break down what the law really says (and what it doesn't say), whether it matters who paid for something, and why arguing over furniture can end up costing you far more in legal fees than the item is even worth. We also walk through four practical ways to divide furniture based on your ex's personality type whether they're amicable, avoidant, high conflict, or controlling so you can sort it out without derailing your entire settlement. ⏱️ Episode Timeline 00:00 – Furniture in Divorce: Common Myths You Need to Know 01:40 – Safety, Legal Disclaimer & Family Violence Warning 02:36 – What the Law Says About Furniture in Divorce 03:03 – Who Owns Furniture After Separation? 07:02 – Divorce and Possession: Who Keeps What? 07:41 – Myth: Do You Lose Furniture If You Leave the House? 09:45 – Cost vs Value: Is Furniture Worth Fighting Over? 11:32 – Emotional Furniture Fights in Divorce Explained 13:58 – Amicable Divorce: The Two List Method (Simple Solution) 16:24 – Avoidant Ex: How to Pack, Send & Move Their Stuff 18:54 – Shed Disputes & When to Get Legal Advice 20:54 – Free Divorce Resources You Can Use 21:43 – When to Move Out During Divorce (Timing Matters) 22:41 – High Conflict Divorce: Should You Sell Everything? 24:50 – Valuing Furniture in Divorce Negotiations 27:55 – Biggest Mistakes People Make With Furniture 31:11 – Don't Let Furniture Ruin Your Property Settlement 34:03 – Mindset Shift: It's Not About the Stuff 35:30 – Fresh Start After Divorce: Letting Go 39:47 – Final Takeaways: Fairness & Moving Forward 🎧 Additional Episodes Mentioned What About Their Stuff and Belongings? (Referenced when discussing how to handle an ex leaving items behind or refusing to collect them) https://youtu.be/T_tQUbhBxbQ?si=kt1ChMF08dquxgkr    Links & Resources 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 Lifeline – 13 11 14   If this episode helped you rethink how to approach the "stuff" in your separation, make sure you follow, rate, review, and share the podcast so others can avoid getting stuck in the same fights.  
• Health and Divorce: How Illness May Affect Property Settlement Percentage 07.04.2026 44m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if: You or your ex has a serious illness or disability You've been a carer during the relationship You have ongoing medical expenses You're worried about future financial support after separation You want to understand how courts assess health in property settlement ⚖️ Legal Disclaimer This podcast is for educational purposes only and provides general information about Australian family law. It is not legal advice. Every situation is different, and you should seek independent professional guidance for your circumstances.     What happens in a property settlement when serious illness is part of the story? In this episode, Mum (a family law specialist and family lawyer) and I unpack one of the most emotional and often misunderstood areas of family law: how health issues, illness, and medical needs may impact your property settlement percentage. Because when you're going through separation, you're not just dividing assets… You're also dealing with uncertainty, fear, ongoing treatment, and the reality of what life will look like moving forward. We talk about what happens if: you cared for a sick partner for years you are the one who is unwell there are ongoing medical expenses or even if someone has a life-limiting illness We break down how the court looks at contributions vs future needs, why simply saying "I'm unwell" isn't enough, and how these factors can actually shift the percentages in your property settlement. If illness has played a role in your relationship on either side this episode will help you understand how the law approaches it, and what it might mean for you. ⏱️ Episode Timeline - Health and Divorce: How Illness May Affect Property Settlement Percentage 00:00 – Illness and Divorce: How Health Impacts Property Settlement 00:22 – Why Health Changes Everything in Divorce Outcomes 01:32 – Meet the Hosts & Divorce Episode Overview 01:57 – Real Story: Endometriosis and Divorce Costs 03:07 – Divorce Property Settlement Explained (Step-by-Step) 04:38 – Caring for a Sick Partner in Divorce: Does It Count? 07:43 – What If You're the Sick Partner in Divorce? 09:46 – Divorce and Spousal Maintenance: Your Options 11:37 – Life Expectancy & Divorce Future Needs Explained 15:47 – Medical Expenses, Kids & Divorce (NDIS Explained) 19:12 – Proving Medical Needs in Divorce Settlements 21:00 – Short-Term vs Long-Term Illness in Divorce 21:41 – Temporary vs Chronic Illness in Divorce Cases 23:34 – Open-Ended Spousal Maintenance in Divorce 24:46 – Remission, Recovery & Divorce Medical Evidence 27:43 – How to Prove Illness in Divorce Court 30:18 – Divorce Surveillance, Fraud Claims & Mental Health 32:48 – When Both Parties Are Sick in Divorce 33:34 – Financial Obligations After Divorce Separation 35:19 – Divorce Agreements: Risks You Need to Know 37:20 – Rapid Fire Divorce Questions About Illness 39:07 – Divorce Mediation Tips When Illness Is Involved 40:46 – The Emotional Reality of Illness in Divorce 42:15 – Final Thoughts: Advocating for Yourself in Divorce   🎧 Episodes Mentioned in This Episode 1️⃣ Consent Orders vs Binding Financial Agreements - https://open.spotify.com/episode/5qgGhdAl5UaOo7LHb2Yf5Y?si=OFf8umvVQ7KAbzntw6AnVg 2️⃣ The Divorce Course (Program / Course Reference) www.thedivorcecourse.com.au     ⚠️ Family Violence & Sensitive Content This episode discusses illness, vulnerability, and complex family dynamics, which may be distressing for some listeners. If you need support in Australia: 📞 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 📞 Lifeline – 13 11 14 🚨 In an emergency, call 000     ⚖️ Legal Disclaimer This podcast is for educational purposes only and provides general information about Australian family law. It is not legal advice. Every situation is different, and you should seek independent professional guidance for your circumstances.     If this episode helped you better understand how health can impact your divorce, please make sure to follow, rate, review, and share the podcast it helps others going through the same thing find this information too.
• Is Your Ex Watching You? Coercive control goes digital. 01.04.2026 44m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if: You feel like your ex knows things they shouldn't You suspect you're being tracked, monitored, or watched You're going through separation and worried about digital safety Your ex had access to your devices, passwords, or accounts You want to protect yourself and your children from tech-based abuse What if your ex knew where you were… who you were talking to… and what you were saying — without you ever telling them? In this episode, we're joined by Catherine Plunkett, Director of Safety Net Australia at WESNET, to unpack the growing reality of technology-facilitated abuse in relationships and after separation. Because abuse doesn't always leave bruises. Sometimes it looks like: your ex showing up where you are unexpectedly knowing things you never told them accessing your messages, accounts, or location And increasingly, this is becoming one of the most common forms of domestic and family violence. We break down what tech abuse actually is, how it happens, the warning signs to look for, and most importantly what you can do to protect yourself and your children. If something doesn't feel right, this episode will help you understand what might be happening and what steps you can take next. ⏱️ Episode Timeline - Is Your Ex Watching You? Tech Abuse in Divorce Explained 00:00 – Is Your Ex Spying on You? Hidden Tech Abuse Signs 01:35 – What Is Tech Abuse? How It Works in Relationships 05:10 – How Common Is Digital Abuse After Separation? 06:52 – Tracking Apps, Spyware & How People Monitor You 12:06 – Warning Signs Your Phone or Accounts Are Compromised 16:20 – What NOT to Do If You Suspect You're Being Watched 18:00 – Digital Safety Checks & Getting the Right Support 20:33 – Safe Phones, New Devices & Protecting Your Accounts 23:12 – That "Alarm Feeling": Trusting Your Instincts 24:11 – Smart Homes & Hidden Tracking Risks You Didn't Expect 26:31 – Cars, GPS & How Vehicles Can Track You 27:45 – Digital Safety Checklist: Steps You Can Take Today 30:47 – How Kids Can Be Used in Tech Monitoring 35:20 – AI, Deepfakes & The Future of Digital Abuse 38:39 – Where to Get Help for Tech Abuse 41:17 – Your Right to Privacy and Safe Communication 42:27 – What Safety Net Australia Does for Victims 44:19 – Final Thoughts, Support & Next Steps 🔗 Links & Resources Safety Net Australia – https://techsafety.org.au eSafety Commissioner – https://www.esafety.gov.au 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 Lifeline Australia – 13 11 14 ⚠️ Family Violence Disclaimer This episode contains discussion of family violence and may be distressing for some listeners. If you are experiencing domestic or family violence, support is available: 📞 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 📞 Lifeline – 13 11 14 🚨 In an emergency, call 000 ⚖️ Legal Disclaimer This podcast is for educational purposes only and discusses general concepts. It is not legal advice. Every situation is different, and you should seek independent professional guidance for your circumstances.
• Refusing 50/50 Care? What to Do in Mediation When Your Child's Safety Comes First 24.03.2026 48m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if: You've been told to attend mediation but feel unsafe agreeing to child care arrangements Your ex is pushing for 50/50 care and you don't believe it's appropriate for the kids You're dealing with substance abuse, family violence, or safety concerns and your child's safety You feel pressured to compromise at mediation when you don't want to You want to understand your options without giving in on safety Have you been told you need to go to mediation, but you're worried about the outcome because you simply cannot budge when it comes to your child's safety? Has your ex demanded 50/50 care, but deep down you know that arrangement isn't in your child's best interests right now? We talk about how to approach mediation when you feel stuck, how to clearly communicate your concerns, and the practical options that may be discussed  including supervised time, stepped arrangements, and drug and alcohol testing. If you're feeling pressured, overwhelmed, or unsure how to stand your ground, this episode will help you navigate mediation with clarity and confidence. ⏱️ Episode Timeline -Refusing 50/50 Care? What to Do in Mediation When Your Child's Safety Comes First [00:00] – Mediation With Safety Fears [02:33] – What Mediation Really Is [05:40] – Holding The Safety Line Why you don't have to agree to unsafe arrangements just to reach an outcome. [06:37] – Define The Real Risks How to clearly identify and communicate your specific safety concerns. [09:27] – What Courts Call Unsafe Understanding how the court views risk and safety in parenting matters. [10:33] – Supervised Time Options Exploring supervised contact as a way to maintain relationships safely. [12:56] – Choosing Contact Centres How supervised contact works and what to consider when selecting a centre. [16:34] – Cutting Contact And Court Optics What happens if time is stopped altogether and how it may be viewed legally. [18:43] – Stepped Parenting Orders Using gradual increases in time to build safety and trust over time. [21:26] – Therapy Conditions And Pitfalls When therapy is suggested, what to watch out for and potential risks. [23:06] – Drug And Alcohol Testing How testing can be used to address concerns and create accountability. [26:25] – Costs And Waitlists The practical realities of supervision services and delays. [26:45] – Paying For Supervision Who pays for supervised time and how this is handled. [27:28] – Preparing For Mediation How to go into mediation feeling clear, confident, and prepared. [28:13] – When They Refuse Supervision What to do if the other parent won't agree to safe options. [28:48] – Best Interests Not 50/50 Why equal time is not automatic and must reflect the child's needs. [30:40] – Court View On Refusal How the court may interpret refusal to compromise or engage. [33:27] – Holding Your Safety Line Practical ways to stay firm without escalating conflict. [35:17] – If Mediation Hits Impasse What happens when no agreement is reached and what comes next. [38:17] – Costs Threats Reality Check Addressing fear around legal costs and pressure tactics. [39:07] – Using Mediation For Property How mediation can still be useful even if parenting isn't resolved. [43:16] – Authenticity And Support Staying grounded, supported, and focused during a difficult process. ⚖️ Family Violence & Legal Disclaimer This episode contains discussion of family violence and may be distressing for some listeners. If you are affected, please consider listening with support or contact: Lifeline (Australia): 13 11 14 1800 RESPECT: 1800 737 732 This podcast is for educational purposes only and discusses general concepts in Australian family law. Every situation is different, and you should seek independent professional guidance for your specific circumstances. 🔗 Helpful Resources 1800 RESPECT – National Domestic Violence Support Lifeline Australia – 13 11 14 Relationships Australia (Supervised Contact Services) Parenting communication apps: OurFamilyWizard, AppClose 🎧 Recommended Episodes Mediation: What It Is (and What It Isn't)  https://youtu.be/YvcWAYuG4QA?si=hSiXFvVDaFDV4J6v Understanding the Best Interests of the Child (Section 60CC) https://youtu.be/k4-QTbfW8XM?si=SDzN2cIzO4FtlMQu Mediation Series: How to Prepare and What to Expect https://youtu.be/cmcFWXD2EBs?si=TqUcJvQzmd2MMNJc  
• The Parenting Order Loopholes Your Ex Might Exploit (And How to Close Them) 18.03.2026 51m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if: You are about to negotiate parenting orders or a parenting plan Your coparent is high conflict, manipulative or controlling You're worried they will twist agreements or exploit loopholes You're preparing for mediation or family court for parenting orders You want parenting orders that actually reduce future arguments Family Violence & Legal Disclaimer This episode contains discussion of family conflict and family violence which may be distressing for some listeners.If you are experiencing family violence or feel unsafe, please contact 1800 RESPECT (Australia) or your local domestic violence support service. This podcast is for educational and informational purposes only. Laura and Lynette are discussing general concepts in Australian family law. Every situation is different, and listeners should obtain independent professional guidance about their specific circumstances. Episode Time Stamps: The Parenting Order Loopholes Your Ex Will Exploit (And How to Close Them) 00:00 High Conflict Co Parenting 01:59 Why Orders Need Clarity 05:10 Changing Orders Is Hard 07:03 Loophole 1 Communication Rules 11:53 Loophole 2 Last Minute Changes 14:12 Loophole 3 Handover Boundaries 20:14 Loophole 4 Extracurricular Conflicts 26:30 Loophole 5 Stop Trash Talking 28:04 High School Choice Traps 29:39 Private School Fee Fights 31:14 School Updates and Access 32:07 Kids Phones and Screen Rules 35:50 Passports and Travel Clauses 40:06 Medical Decisions and Info 44:34 Emergency Contact Requirements 46:27 Rosters Holidays and Ambiguity 50:07 Think About What Ifs 51:12 Wrap Up and Disclaimers     Helpful Resources Lifeline (Australia): 13 11 14 1800 RESPECT: 1800 737 732 Family Court of Australia resources on parenting arrangements Parenting communication apps: OurFamilyWizard, AppClose, Talking Parents Episodes Mentioned in This Episode 1. 12 Agreements to Include in Parenting Plans Referenced when discussing the main structure of parenting agreements before talking about loopholes. https://open.spotify.com/episode/6j325rOj96QvV8spPnYsX5?si=td4XlKQZSr6CXfCSm9H_bA 2. Handover Hell Mentioned during the discussion about pick-up and drop-off conflicts and handover disputes. https://open.spotify.com/episode/6Pskjns3vZkLyv9FCefvxm?si=guIkwi1ITJuTOnshvpP9VA 3. Trash Talking Referenced when discussing parents speaking negatively about the other parent around the children.https://open.spotify.com/episode/7bxqn5I6B1HCzO9r0zKnxY?si=nEH3splzQxSTBOUikJJHhA 4. Interstate Travel With Children After Separation Mentioned during the travel and passport boundary discussion. https://open.spotify.com/episode/0auxUUS6QSh0ILcGHXbQgk?si=CmhYz74pSquyhTI2dgRMbQ 5. Tech Facilitated Abuse Referenced during the children's phones, devices and monitoring discussion. COMING SOON 6. Sole Parental Responsibility Suggested for listeners who want to understand decision-making authority around medical or school issues. https://open.spotify.com/episode/2O0VczmgtAPUrvcgJiF8HP?si=BM0nanlwTP6k67SMF8yg4g Summary Many parents believe that once parenting orders are made, the conflict will finally stop. But the reality is court orders don't magically change behaviour. If you are dealing with a high-conflict, manipulative, controlling or avoidant ex, poorly written parenting orders can become a playground for loopholes, misunderstandings and ongoing arguments. In this episode of the Divorce Course Podcast, Laura and Lynette break down the most common loopholes people exploit in parenting orders and the practical boundaries you may want to think about before signing anything. Because while parenting orders can't eliminate conflict entirely, clear boundaries can prevent many of the arguments before they even start. You'll learn how to think about communication, handovers, school decisions, travel rules, technology, medical issues and more all through the lens of preventing future conflict.  
• Can I Make My Ex Leave the House? 5 Strategies After Separation 11.03.2026 39m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if: You are separated but still living under the same roof as your ex You feel stuck in the house and don't know how to move forward You want to know what an ouster order is You want to understand sole occupancy Someone told you if you leave the house you will lose your rights to it You want to understand what you can legally do to create space after separation Your ex refuses to move out and you don't know what your options are You're wondering whether you can make your ex leave the house You're dealing with a manipulative, avoidant, high-conflict, or coercive control type ex You want to learn about trial separations, nesting, temporary arrangements, and sole occupancy orders You're worried about how staying under one roof is affecting you or your children You want practical strategies to move forward without damaging your property settlement ⚖️ Legal & Safety Disclaimer This podcast provides general educational information only and is based primarily on Australian family law. It is not legal advice and should not replace advice from a qualified legal professional. Always seek independent legal advice specific to your circumstances. This episode also discusses family violence and coercive control, which may be distressing. If you feel unsafe or need support in Australia, contact 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732), Lifeline (13 11 14), or call 000 in an emergency. When a relationship breaks down, most people focus on the big things: the kids, the property settlement, and the future. But one of the most suffocating parts of separation is often the very first step — how do you stop living under the same roof as your ex? If you're walking on eggshells at home, wondering whether you can leave, whether you'll lose your rights to the house, or whether you can legally make your ex move out, you're not alone. These questions come up for almost everyone navigating separation. In this episode, Mum and I break down five realistic ways to create space after separation without damaging your property settlement. We talk about what you can legally do, what you absolutely shouldn't do, and the myths that keep so many people stuck living under one roof for far longer than they need to. [00:00] – The Fear of Being Stuck in the House During Separation Why the family home becomes one of the biggest emotional pressure points in divorce, and why living under one roof with your ex can feel suffocating for you and your children. [02:43] – What You Should NEVER Do During Separation Why throwing belongings outside, changing locks, cutting utilities, or intimidating your ex can backfire legally and even be considered family violence. [04:44] – Divorce Myth: Do You Lose Your Rights If You Leave the House? Debunking one of the most damaging divorce myths that keeps people trapped in toxic living situations during property settlement. [06:05] – Five Ways to Create Space After Separation An overview of the five realistic strategies couples use to stop living under one roof during divorce. [07:45] – Option 1: Simply Asking Your Ex to Move Out When a calm, respectful conversation about separation can actually work and how to confirm agreements without escalating conflict. [09:58] – Option 2: Creating a Temporary Living Arrangement How structured temporary agreements can help one partner move out while property settlement negotiations continue. [13:16] – Option 3: Nesting or House Swapping for the Kids What "bird nesting" is, why some divorced parents try it, and the emotional and logistical challenges that often arise. [18:47] – Option 4: The Trial Move-Out Strategy How trial separations can reduce confrontation and why temporary moves often become permanent. [20:23] – Trial Separation Tactics That Reduce Conflict Why trial separations can help avoid high-conflict confrontations, especially with manipulative or controlling partners. [21:06] – Why Many Partners Don't See Divorce Coming Why some people emotionally check out of relationships long before the separation conversation happens. [22:47] – The Risk of Control and Financial Backlash After Separation How manipulative or controlling partners may react when separation becomes real. [24:04] – Coercive Control and the 'Amnesia' Effect How distance from a controlling relationship can help you recognise patterns of manipulation you couldn't see before. [25:40] – Ouster Orders and Sole Occupancy Explained When courts can legally order one spouse to leave the home during separation. [27:59] – The Risks of Applying for Sole Occupancy Orders Why asking the court to decide who stays in the house can sometimes backfire. [29:55] – Domestic Violence Orders Without Leaving the House How protection orders can sometimes be issued even when couples continue living under one roof. [32:54] – Safety Planning and Support Resources Why separation can be a high-risk time and the importance of having a safety plan in place. [34:12] – Common Divorce Myths That Keep People Stuck Debunking misinformation about living under one roof, property rights, and separation timelines. [35:42] – Why Physical Space Makes Divorce Negotiations Easier How creating distance can improve mediation outcomes and reduce emotional conflict. [37:41] – Final Takeaways: Moving Forward After Separation Why creating physical and emotional space is often the first step toward starting your new life after divorce. Episodes Mentioned in This Episode "I Really Want to Keep the House" https://open.spotify.com/episode/6TzW9skKgvO8fjm0gcFPRg?si=t9q2a8TRRS-x7FAWEfBS9g "Five Out-of-the-Box Ideas to Keep the House in Property Settlement"https://open.spotify.com/episode/5RgIsTMGh7EBqqbAgIVQ5Y?si=CRxIPgc-Sm6gRvin285Q_A  "The Divorce Personality Types Quiz Episode" https://open.spotify.com/episode/4IPDOWvfPKsSrPaCvf7Se8?si=7LfUwX6OSa-ym_OOujCt5Q "How to Create a Safety Plan" https://open.spotify.com/episode/5hMmTS99LaeUWOXSxKMx1D?si=Oh5NMylQRs2HWuVFDT6szg Support Services (Australia) 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 National domestic, family and sexual violence support service. Lifeline – 13 11 14 24-hour crisis support and suicide prevention service. Emergency Services – Call 000 if you are in immediate danger.
• When It's Not Just Conflict: How Coercive Control Shows Up in Divorce 03.03.2026 50m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if: You're unsure whether what you experienced was abuse You've heard the term "coercive control" but don't fully understand it You feel confused, guilty or constantly off balance in your relationship Negotiations during separation feel manipulative rather than constructive You're worried about how coercive control affects children You want clarity and validation around your experience This episode discusses family violence and may be triggering for some listeners. If you need support, please reach out to 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732) or Lifeline (13 11 14). This discussion is general education only and not psychological or legal advice. ⏱️ Episode Timeline: When It's Not Just Conflict: How Coercive Control Shows Up in Divorce [00:00] – Is This Normal Conflict or Something More? [01:45] – Safety Disclaimer & Family Violence Support Services [02:35] – Why Naming Coercive Control Matters [03:35] – What Coercive Control Actually Is (Simple Definition) [04:32] – Patterns, Not Incidents: Why Abuse Isn't Always Obvious  Why domestic violence is no longer viewed as isolated incidents but as ongoing patterns of behaviour that create harm over time. [05:35] – No Bruises, Still Harm: Emotional & Psychological Abuse Explained  How gaslighting, micromanagement, silent treatment and financial control cause real psychological damage without visible injuries. [07:13] – How Do You Explain Coercive Control to Others? [10:03] – The Three D's: Disrespect, Disempowerment & Distortion  A practical framework to identify coercive control behaviours in relationships and divorce negotiations. [11:09] – Disempowerment: Fear, Micromanagement & Loss of Autonomy  How controlling partners create dependency, intimidation and fear of consequences — even without physical violence. [12:11] – Post-Separation Control: When Abuse Continues After Divorce  Why coercive control often escalates during separation, mediation and family court proceedings. [13:59] – Disrespect & Double Standards in Abusive Relationships [16:27] – Distortion & Gaslighting: Rewriting Reality [18:48] – Narcissism vs Coercive Control: What's the Difference?  Understanding the overlap between narcissistic traits and coercive control in emotionally abusive relationships. [20:09] – Seeing the Whole Pattern (Not Just One Argument)  Why focusing on single incidents hides the broader pattern of domination and manipulation. [21:56] – How Coercive Control Impacts Children  Why children are not just witnesses but victims in coercively controlled households — including hypervigilance and emotional harm. [24:22] – Protecting Children in Family Court  How concerns about coercive control can be reframed as "alienation" — and why understanding legal narratives matters. [25:34] – One Safe Parent: The Protective Buffer for Kids [26:15] – Why It's So Hard to Leave an Abusive Relationship  Financial dependence, fear, threats, trauma bonding and loss of autonomy explained. [27:56] – The Power Myth: Why Abusers Seem So Smart and Untouchable [28:54] – Trauma Bonding Explained  The cycle of highs and lows that keeps people emotionally attached in abusive dynamics. [30:01] – Court Fears & Post-Separation Abuse  Why people fear family court when coercive control continues through legal processes. [31:03] – Negotiation vs Control: The Simple Test  How to tell the difference between genuine divorce negotiation and manipulation disguised as cooperation. [33:05] – The Three D's in Legal Tactics [34:15] – Legal Examples: Silent Treatment, Rigid Demands & Pressure Tactics  Recognising micromanagement, unreasonable timelines, and threats dressed up as "legal process." [38:04] – Using Children to Maintain Control After Separation  Excessive updates, micromanaging parenting decisions, and control disguised as "concern." [44:25] – Hold Onto Clarity: Documenting Patterns of Abuse  Why writing things down helps counter gaslighting and protects your psychological stability during divorce. [46:37] – Legal Narratives & Gatekeeping in Court  How coercive control can be minimised or reframed in legal settings — and why showing patterns matters. [48:12] – Hope, Support & Life After Coercive Control  side. [49:06] – Workshop Resources & Next Steps 🔗 Resources Mentioned 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 Lifeline – 13 11 14 https://kirovapsychology.com.au/ (Melbourne workshops & resources) Previous episodes on: Mediation vs Manipulation https://youtu.be/cmcFWXD2EBs?si=LOOTB_BwYJIQSmn9 Legal Abuse: https://youtu.be/h2Pu2MmbDxw?si=-HiUdJAfdvoMK8fL Alienation Allegations: https://youtu.be/g8ofj-Sp3n4?si=_0tX3XSweEMzYp6o Safety Planning https://youtu.be/R4M8Hr9cbh0?si=0XyklWL2VMwx_cmN
• When In-Laws Interfere in Your Divorce (What You Have to Respond To) 24.02.2026 38m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if… ● Your ex's parents or extended family are texting, pressuring or negotiating on their behalf ● Grandparents are demanding time with your children ● You're being accused of owing money that was supposedly a "gift" ● You're dealing with coercive control through third parties ● You feel like you're negotiating with an entire extended family ● You're unsure what you legally have to respond to ● Your mediation agreements change after your ex speaks to their family ● You want clear boundaries and practical guidance during separation If you are going through separation or divorce and suddenly your ex's family has become involved, this episode will help you understand what your responsibility actually is  and where it ends. In this conversation, Mum and I unpack what you legally have to respond to, what you can ignore, and how to protect your peace when outside pressure starts escalating conflict. We talk about grandparents family members negotiating property settlement, so-called "loans" during property disputes, mediation interference, coercive control via in-laws, and how to set boundaries without damaging your credibility. If you're feeling overwhelmed, ganged up on, or unsure how to manage extended family pressure  this episode is your permission slip to protect yourself. Legal Disclaimer:This episode contains general educational discussion only and is not legal advice. We are based in Australia and laws differ between countries. Always seek independent legal advice tailored to your personal circumstances before making decisions.  Family Violence & Safety Trigger Warning Disclaimer This episode includes discussion of family violence, coercive control and high-conflict dynamics.If you are experiencing family violence, intimidation, harassment or feel unsafe at any time, please seek support immediately. ⏱️ Episode Timeline for When In-Laws Interfere in Your Divorce (What You Have to Respond To) 00:00 – Introduction: When Your Ex's Family Gets Involved What happens when parents, siblings or extended family step into your separation? 02:05 – How Family Dynamics Shift After Separation Why "blood is thicker than water" can suddenly feel very real. 05:35 – Do You Have to Respond to In-Laws Negotiating on Your Ex's Behalf? What you can ignore, what to document, and how to protect yourself. 08:10 – Grandparents' Rights Explained (Australia) When grandparents can see children and what your responsibility actually is. 14:15 – Gifts vs Loans in Property Settlement When a $100,000 "gift" suddenly becomes a claimed debt. 19:50 – Can Grandparents Demand Time If Your Ex Isn't Seeing the Kids? Understanding the best interests of the children and practical considerations. 24:20 – Family Members Pressuring or Manipulating Children How courts view this behaviour and what you can do. 27:10 – Divorce Mediation Agreements Changing After Family Influence Why outside pressure can derail settlements and how to manage it. 30:30 – Boundaries With Your Own Family During Divorce How to handle well-meaning but unhelpful advice and pressure. 31:45 – What You Can Control vs What You Can't Practical mindset shifts to protect your peace. 35:45 – "It's Not About Them" Why your focus must remain on you, your children, and your divorce case.   🔗 Links & Resources ● DIY Divorce Blueprint – Courses & Support www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/enrol ● 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 ● Lifeline – 13 11 14 Related Episodes: ● Trash Talking – What To Do When Your Ex Badmouths You ● 10 Boundaries for a Healthy Divorce ● How to Create a Safety Plan ● Dealing With Narc Lies in Court ● When Your Ex Lies in Court Closing Reminder Divorce is hard enough without feeling like you're negotiating with an entire extended family.If this episode helped you feel clearer, calmer or more confident about setting boundaries during separation, please follow, rate and review the podcast. Your support helps more women find grounded, practical information when they need it most.And remember you are not responsible for managing everyone else's emotions.This is not about them.
• How Long Does Divorce or DeFacto Separation Really Take? Your Complete Process Walkthrough 18.02.2026 43m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if… You feel overwhelmed and don't know what the steps of the divorce process are You're separated (or thinking about separating) and want clarity on what happens next You're stuck in negotiations or dealing with a stonewalling, avoidant or controlling ex You want to understand mediation, arbitration, court filings, interim hearings and trials You're self-represented and need a clear, realistic roadmap of the family law process You want to feel calmer, in control, and informed about the journey ahead You're already in the court system and want to know what the upcoming stages really mean You want to avoid panic, surprises and fear of the unknown If you're going through separation, divorce or a parenting/property dispute in Australia, this episode will walk you through every major step in the family law process  from the moment of separation all the way to a final hearing. No jargon. No fear. No overwhelm. Just a clear explanation of what you may face and how long things typically take. We break down how to negotiate, when mediation works (and why it fails), what arbitration actually is, how to use deadlines and case law to manage a difficult ex, when court becomes necessary, what happens at each court stage, and how to avoid getting stuck for months or years. Whether you're at the very beginning or already halfway through, this roadmap will help you feel grounded and prepared. 📌 LEGAL DISCLAIMER: This episode is general education only — not legal advice. Always seek independent legal advice for your specific situation. ⏱️ Episode Timeline 00:00 – Divorce Roadmap Overview: What to Expect From Separation to Trial A complete explanation of the stages ahead and why understanding the process matters. 00:38 – Meet the Hosts + Education-Only Disclaimer Why we give information, not advice — and how to use the episode wisely. 01:59 – Why Your Separation Date Matters (Especially Under One Roof) How timelines, contributions, and financial outcomes are affected. 03:45 – DIY Negotiations: Why a 'Signed Paper' Isn't Enough The trap so many people fall into — and how it can cost you later. 05:28 – Consent Orders & Financial Agreements Explained What makes an agreement legally binding and what the court checks for. 06:59 – Parenting vs Property Mediation: How They Work & How to Prepare Why combining both in one day often backfires. 10:55 – After Mediation Fails: Arbitration, Offers & Partial Agreements How to keep momentum instead of getting stuck. 13:28 – Stonewalling & Delay Tactics: Deadlines, Notice to File & Case Law Strategies to shift an avoidant or controlling ex. 19:03 – Filing in Court: What Documents You Need & What They Mean Affidavits, financial statements, notices of risk and more. 20:47 – Should You File Parenting & Property Together? The advantages and pitfalls. 22:03 – Using Court Filings as Negotiation Leverage Why an initiating application often triggers settlement. 23:11 – First Court Event Explained (It's Not a Trial!) What registrars do, what decisions they can make, and what they can't. 23:43 – PPP500 & Evatt List: What These Court Pathways Mean for You Faster lists for smaller pools and family violence matters. 25:52 – Interim Hearings: Urgent Parenting & Property Issues When the court steps in early. 28:02 – Court-Ordered Mediation: Reality Checks & Settlement Pressure The moment many cases resolve. 31:35 – Readiness Hearing: Preparing for Trial Final directions, valuations, and evidence. 33:11 – Final Trial: What Actually Happens in the Courtroom Cross-examination, timelines, outcomes and appeals. 36:37 – Big Picture Strategy: Stay Focused on Your Stage Why thinking too far ahead causes overwhelm. 40:09 – Costs Orders & Legal Abuse The consequences for bad behaviour in litigation. 41:58 – Wrap-Up: Tell It to the Judge + Course Info & Outro 🔗 Links & Resources ✨The Course: https://www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/enrol ✨ Courses & Free Support Resources: www.thedivorcecourse.com.au 💛 Support Services 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 Lifeline – 13 11 14
• Separated… but Stuck? The Chicken & Egg Problem Keeping You in Divorce Limbo 11.02.2026 38m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if… You feel stuck and unable to move forward after separating You're separated under one roof and nothing is changing Your stuck deciding whether to go to court next or just give up You're overwhelmed by the emotional load and decision fatigue You don't know whether to start with the house, the money, the kids or the legal steps You're waiting for the "right time" but it never seems to come You want clarity about why you feel frozen and what to do next You're scared of making a mistake or starting conflict You want a practical, compassionate explanation of why early separation feels like quicksand You need reassurance that you're not failing you're human PLEASE note Lyn's audio file at the end of the episode was lost so we have cobbled together what we had to finish the episode as we know so many of you listen each week so, sorry no embroidered cushion this week. Hopefully the tech will behave itself next week for you all.  Trigger warning there are discussions of Family Violence & Coercive Control.  Legal Warning: this is not legal advice 📝 Episode Summary: Separated… but Stuck? The Chicken & Egg Problem Keeping You in Divorce Limbo If you've ever felt like you're separated but… nothing is moving, you're not alone. In this powerful episode, Laura and Lyn unpack the "Chicken & Egg Problem" of early divorce — that confusing, exhausting stage where every decision feels dependent on another decision, and you don't know which one you're meant to make first. Should you move out? Should you get legal help? Should you talk to the bank? Should you wait for your ex? Should you apply for parenting arrangements? Should you start disclosure? Should you sell the house? Should you stay for the kids? Everything feels tangled, and you feel frozen. We break down why this paralysis happens, why it's normal, and how small, strategic steps can help you get out of emotional and practical limbo. You'll hear examples from real separations, insights about overwhelm and avoidance, and the surprising reasons so many women stay "stuck" for months — or even years. This episode is your permission slip to take one small step, feel less afraid, and finally understand why your nervous system is doing exactly what it was designed to do. This episode contains general separation discussion, not legal advice.     ⏱️ Episode Timeline 00:00 — Why Early Separation Feels Impossible: The Chicken & Egg Problem 01:05 — What Keeps Women Stuck in Divorce Limbo 02:28 — Emotional Overload, Fear & Decision Paralysis 04:50 — Separated Under One Roof: Why Nothing Changes 07:14 — "Where Do I Start?" Understanding the Overwhelm 10:40 — The Pressure to Have a Full Plan Before Taking Action 12:33 — Money Fear, Housing Fear & Losing Stability 15:55 — Why Conflict Avoidance Keeps You Frozen 17:48 — Waiting for the Perfect Moment (And Why It Won't Come) 20:22 — How to Take One Small Step Without Starting a War 23:15 — Using Information to Reduce Fear and Panic 26:44 — What You Can Control vs What You Can't 29:30 — Making Progress Even When You're Not Ready 32:01 — Reassurance for Anyone Feeling Stuck 35:14 — Final Encouragement: You Don't Have to Solve Everything Today     🔗 Links & Resources ✨ Download the FREE Divorce Personality Quiz Printable 👉 www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/quiz ✨ Join the Newsletter for Bonus Divorce Strategy Tools (We only send practical, supportive content — no fluff.) www.thedivorcecourse.com.au ✨ Safety & Support Resources 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 Lifeline – 13 11 14   If this episode helped you feel seen, understood, or just a little less stuck, please follow, rate, and review the podcast. Sharing this episode might give another woman the clarity she desperately needs.  
• Take the Divorce Personality Quiz: & Learn Why Your Strategy MUST Match Your Ex's Behaviour 05.02.2026 54m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if… You're confused about why your divorce feels so hard You're not sure how to communicate or negotiate with your ex You suspect you're dealing with avoidance, conflict, or control or you are a people pleaser. You're tired of being blindsided and want clarity You want a divorce strategy that matches the actual dynamic you're in You want a downloadable, printable version of the quiz You love practical tools that help you feel calm, informed, and back in control You want to take the quiz and finally understand your ex's divorce behaviour Trigger warning there are discussions of Family Violence & Coercive Control.  Legal Warning: this is not legal advice 📝 Episode Summary In this episode, Laura and Lyn guide you through the 20-question Divorce Personality Quiz, designed to help you identify the divorce pattern you're dealing with Your divorce type affects: your communication strategy your negotiation style whether mediation will work how to set boundaries what evidence you need how to emotionally protect yourself whether safety planning is appropriate You'll take the quiz with us live inside the episode and learn what each answer (A, B, C, or D) reveals about your ex's behaviour. This insight can transform your divorce experience by helping you understand what's really happening and why your current approach may or may not be working. And if you want the free downloadable PDF of the quiz, a printable results sheet, and access to our bonus email guide "How to Strategise Based on Your Divorce Type", head to: 👉 www.thedivorcecourse.com.au (Join the newsletter and we'll send the printable straight to your inbox.) This episode includes general behavioural discussion, not legal advice. ⏱️ Episode Timeline 00:00 Introduction: What Divorce Type Are You Dealing With? 00:36 Why Identifying Your Divorce Type Matters for Your Strategy 00:58 Overview of the Four Divorce Types: Amicable, Avoidant, High-Conflict & Controlling 01:14 How to Take the Divorce Personality Quiz 01:39 Meet Your Hosts and Episode Overview 02:11 Understanding Divorce Personality Types & Behaviour Patterns 03:15 Divorce Quiz Part 1: Decision-Making, Conflict & Communication 05:51 What Your Answers Mean: Interpreting the First Quiz Results 09:40 Divorce Quiz Part 2: Boundaries, Money Issues & Emotional Safety 19:05 Divorce Quiz Part 3: Rules, Power Imbalances & Information Control 25:23 Final Divorce Quiz Questions + Strategy Insights 30:08 Recognising Manipulative or Controlling Divorce Dynamics 31:41 How to Identify Your Divorce Type From Your Quiz Results 32:30 Amicable Divorce: Strengths, Risks & When It Fails 35:14 Avoidant Ex Partners: Why Progress Feels Impossible 38:23 High-Conflict Divorce Explained: Escalation, Triggers & Survival Strategies 41:16 Controlling or Coercive Ex Partners: Red Flags & Safety Considerations 44:40 How to Create a Safety Plan During Divorce 48:20 Helpful Resources, Support Services & Next Steps 52:49 Final Thoughts: Matching Your Strategy to Your Ex's Behaviour 🔗 Links & Resources ✨ Download the FREE Divorce Personality Quiz Printable 👉 www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/quiz ✨ Join the Newsletter for Bonus Divorce Strategy Tools (We only send practical, supportive content ) ✨ Safety & Support Resources 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 Lifeline – 13 11 14 Episodes Mentioned 10 Boundaries You Should Set Up Before Divorce https://open.spotify.com/episode/0ecDTxw4rTc3zXBkcjuYpA?si=Eb_uqTJnSbS2Vtyz80tBmQ   The Purple Book Episode (Coercive Control & Abuse Patterns) https://open.spotify.com/episode/1ccm01eMpJ3TMZa2uMaUMN?si=WJ7wQy9mTmKYhd2sTPiO0g   The Original "Divorce Personality Types" Episode https://open.spotify.com/episode/1X89h1IBOUa0QFxiICIuwo?si=neoemW5URuubT8VYaGjlPw If this episode helped you finally understand the behaviour you've been dealing with, please follow, rate and review the podcast. And don't forget to grab your FREE quiz download  it's one of the most powerful tools to help you navigate your divorce with clarity and confidence.
• 10 Things That Quietly Destroy Your Family Court Case (Sometimes before you've even gone to court) 27.01.2026 49m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if… You're worried your custody or property case might end up eventually in court.  You are preparing for Family Court or worried your case might escalate You want to avoid mistakes that judges hate seeing in parenting or property matters You're dealing with a high-conflict ex or coercive control You're self-represented and want to understand what the court looks for You want to protect your credibility and stay child-focused You feel overwhelmed and want to understand how to present better in court You want to understand how Family Court judges make decisions If you're going through separation, divorce, or a parenting dispute in Australia, this episode will help you avoid the most common mistakes people make in the Family Court. These insights can make or break your credibility, influence parenting outcomes, and help you stay calm and strategic throughout the legal process. In this episode, we unpack 10 behaviours that can ruin your case — the things that damage cases, frustrate judges, increase legal costs, and affect how your evidence is viewed. Whether you're self-represented, considering mediation, managing a high-conflict ex, or worried about how your actions may be interpreted, this conversation will give you clarity on what the court expects from parents. Learn how to stay child-focused, how to avoid actions that look like parental alienation, how to communicate effectively, how to avoid sabotaging your own case, and why honesty, disclosure, and consistency matter so much. If you're feeling overwhelmed, emotional, or stuck in conflict, this episode offers guidance to help you stay grounded and organised. LEGAL DISCLAIMER: This episode contains general discussion only this is  not legal advice please always get independent legal advice as each situation is different.  Trigger Warning: This episode has some discussions of family violence.     ⏱️ Episode Timeline 00:00 – Introduction: How to Avoid Mistakes That Hurt Your Family Court Case Overview of the most common behaviours that weaken parenting and property cases. 02:07 – Why Judges Prioritise Child-Focused Parenting in Family Court Understanding how child welfare drives decisions and how to demonstrate it clearly. 06:36 – Keeping Emotions Out of Family Court: What Judges Look For Why emotional reactions, venting and accusations can damage your credibility. 13:26 – Presenting Evidence Properly: What Counts in Family Court How to gather, organise and present evidence that the court will actually rely on. 16:59 – The Serious Consequences of Lying or Exaggerating in Court How dishonesty can destroy your case and impact parenting or property outcomes. 21:27 – Disclosure Rules in Property Settlement: What You MUST Provide Explaining financial disclosure obligations and what happens if you don't comply. 25:26 – Following Court Orders and Deadlines: Why Timing Matters How delays, missed tasks or ignoring directions reflect poorly on your case. 25:58 – Understanding Family Court Practice Directions (CPD Requirements) What the Central Practice Direction means for your behaviour and preparation. 28:40 – Narrowing the Issues Before Court: What Judges Expect You to Do Why bringing every problem to court backfires and how to refine your case. 33:19 – Avoiding Behaviour That Looks Like Parental Alienation How to protect your children and yourself without appearing to obstruct the other parent. 39:43 – Acting Reasonably in Family Court: How It Influences Outcomes Examples of unreasonable behaviour and why judges pay close attention to it. 42:03 – Courtroom Etiquette, Presentation and Final Takeaways How to conduct yourself, communicate effectively, and stay credible throughout your case.     🔗 Links & Resources Free Webinar https://www.thedivorcecourse.com.au/divorcewebinarregistration The Divorce Course Website – Courses & Support www.thedivorcecourse.com.au 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 Lifeline – 13 11 14 Dealing with Narc Lies in court https://open.spotify.com/episode/5SdkXhj3vC2tfO3gDdkM6y?si=P-fwZYVSQxO7JnVs5yYJdw When your ex lies in court https://open.spotify.com/episode/2OpAGxXfx78iAO81TMPPxJ?si=wcN-tRFdSaSjGLU51fmV7w Overcoming disclosure delays  https://open.spotify.com/episode/0uOO8dKYV4NWlCfyu8FZEh?si=PI-J7YtGTb6pFRKGa7KjdA Disclosure Deadlocks https://open.spotify.com/episode/2yrShRhq4jcGVuVDN6Jq6C?si=ZFmAHXmAT1-JS0neHjsDHQ Is your ex hiding assets  https://open.spotify.com/episode/4KbgLRFXB9r2rCz3vycZ98?si=nKf11LeYS_66Uzn003Ydug Central Practice Directions https://www.fcfcoa.gov.au/fl/pd/fam-cpd False Accusations of Parental Alienation https://open.spotify.com/episode/0l9L5SDovV515EU4H5gpIf?si=jNYKY5cBTCatIXZpEHXisQ Handover Hell https://open.spotify.com/episode/6Pskjns3vZkLyv9FCefvxm?si=UrHDcaRBTwuKpnVmWty-qA Family Reports https://open.spotify.com/episode/4k2Z4glD8WpY4dsqz6vn5Y?si=MMj_I2N5RlaT_5flBfZjMQ Court Etiquette  https://open.spotify.com/episode/0JOwxZOGxT182UOp8iqd8z?si=8ib6y9qLRvuD5n8AO4y46w 💛 Closing Reminder If this episode helped you feel more prepared or confident, please follow, rate, and review the podcast. Your support helps more women find clear, supportive information during their divorce or separation.  
• Finding Hope Again: The Charity Giving Women a Voice during DV, Coercive Control & Divorce 21.01.2026 34m

  🎧 Listen to this episode if… You're going through DV, coercive control, divorce or separation You've survived DV and want to help other women going through it You feel alone, isolated, or unsure where to turn You want to hear about real support available for women in crisis You've lost hope and need to know good people still exist You want to understand what homelessness really looks like for women You want to connect with a service that listens without judgment You've wondered where to get help if you don't know where to start   📝 Episode Summary If you've ever felt invisible, silenced, or completely alone while living through domestic violence, coercive control, separation, or divorce this episode is for you. Today, Laura sits down with Jo West, the founder of 4 Voices, a remarkable charity supporting women experiencing domestic violence, financial abuse, homelessness, social isolation, and coercive control. This episode is different from our usual legal conversations it's a conversation about hope, humanity, and the power of connection when someone is going through hell and doesn't know where to turn. Jo shares the reality of what women face when they're living in fear, why so many are afraid to reach out, and how simple acts of kindness like someone showing up, listening, and seeing you can genuinely change the course of a woman's life. If you're struggling right now, this episode will remind you of something important: There are helpers. You are not alone. And there is support waiting for you. TRIGGER WARNING: This episode contains general discussion about domestic violence and support, not legal information. Finding Hope Again: The Charity Giving Women a Voice during DV, Coercive Control & Divorce ⏱️ Episode Timeline [00:00] Meet Four Voices: A Support Service for Women Facing DV & Crisis [01:00] Why Women Experiencing Coercive Control Often Feel Too Afraid to Reach Out [02:06] Hidden Homelessness: The Reality for Women Leaving Unsafe Homes [03:41] How Four Voices Uses Human Connection to Support Isolated Women [07:00] What Happens on a Four Voices Support Van Shift [09:04] A Story of Strength: One Woman Starting Over After 25 Years of Abuse [12:33] Financial Abuse, Survival Mode & Why Leaving Is So Hard [14:00] Why Some Women Get Turned Away From Services [16:57] A Phone-Based Support System Designed for Women Who Are Scared to Talk [18:55] Check-Ins, Consistency & Why They Matter for Recovery [20:40] How You Can Help: Volunteering, Corporate Support & Raising Awareness [23:50] Understanding the Hidden Crisis of Female Homelessness [27:23] Misconceptions About DV, Leaving, and Life After Abuse [30:41] Hope Stories: Courage, Connection & What Keeps Jo Going [33:30] Final Message for Anyone Feeling Alone or Hopeless   🔗 Links & Resources Four Voices Charity: https://www.4voices.org.au Instagram: @4voicesau 1800RESPECT – 1800 737 732 Lifeline – 13 11 14 If in danger, call 000 immediately in Australia   🚨 Support Services (Australia) 1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 Lifeline – 13 11 14 Safe Beds for Pets (RSPCA)   💛 Closing Reminder If this conversation brought you comfort or hope, please follow, rate, and review the podcast. Sharing this episode could help another woman find the support she desperately needs.