The Francesca Psychology Podcast

FBI Hostage Negotiator: How To Influence Anyone & Get What You Want - Chris Voss 05.06.2026 1h 7m

Chris Voss is a former FBI hostage negotiator, author of the bestselling book Never Split the Difference, and the CEO of The Black Swan Group.The Black Swan Group: https://www.blackswanltd.com/0:00 Intro: The power of emotional intelligence and empathy.01:32 Becoming an FBI hostage negotiator.03:15 Day-to-day life in the Crisis Negotiation Unit.05:07 Defining negotiation as collaboration and trust.08:05 The Nvidia example: trust as a business currency.12:35 What drives people: the importance of avoiding loss.15:48 How to win a negotiation: vision drives decision.19:07 What is tactical empathy?21:07 Using calibrated questions to induce thinking.26:14 Asking for favors using empathy and overstating negatives.29:00 Using No instead of Yes in negotiations.34:58 The power of playfulness, gratitude, and curiosity.36:34 Dealing with liars and gaslighting.43:46 Tips for dealing with stubborn people.50:00 The magic wand phrasing technique.52:48 Common negotiation mistakes, such as pitching too early.55:36 Why you should only ask Why me?56:43 Differences in negotiation between genders, focusing on tone of voice.58:43 Deactivating aggressive or pressured counterparts.1:03:30 Winning arguments with kindness.

World No.1 Sleep Expert: The Perfect Formula For Deep Sleep - Dr Matt Walker 07.05.2026 1h 26m

Dr Matt Walker is a professor of neuroscience and one of the world’s leading researchers on sleep. He is also the author of the bestselling book Why We Sleep, which helped bring the science of sleep into the mainstream and changed how millions of people think about the role sleep.00:00 Intro01:10 The Importance of Sleep05:08 Understanding Dreams and Their Functions13:41 Nightmares and Their Impact15:18 Sleep and Creativity19:14 Consequences of Poor Sleep25:44 How Much Sleep Do We Need?31:42 Improving Sleep Hygiene36:20 Addressing Insomnia42:36 Waking Up in the Middle of the Night46:30 Sleep Supplements: Do They Work?50:09 The Impact of Alcohol on Sleep55:08 Common Sleep Myths and Mistakes01:01:35 The Science of Napping01:04:05 Exploring Sleep Divorce01:11:10 Temperature and Sleep Quality01:19:25 Strategies for Overcoming Jet Lag01:22:44 The Formula for Perfect Sleep

How To Manage Negative Or Intrusive Thoughts - Dr Ethan Kross 16.04.2026 41m

Ethan Kross is an award-winning psychology professor at the University of Michigan, founder of the Emotion & Self-Control Laboratory, and bestselling author of Chatter and Shift.00:00 Intro01:45 What is an inner voice03:44 Intrusive thoughts07:52 Types of people that have more intrusive thoughts08:55 Types of chatter and harmful self talk12:48 How does one develop a harmful inner voice16:20 How to take control of your inner voice20:33 How to help someone struggling23:45 Confident inner voice27:17 Connection between inner voice and emotions29:10 The percent of time we experience emotions31:06 Common myths about emotional regulation36:50 What are shifters38:00 How our environment influences our emotions40:08 The best tool for everyday life

The Uncomfortable Question You Should Ask on Every First Date - Alain de Botton 20.03.2026 1h 19m

Alain de Botton is one of the most influential philosophers of our time, best-selling author, and the founder of The School of Life. His work has helped millions of people develop greater self-understanding and improve their relationships.00:00 Intro01:56 The best thinking comes from problems07:45 The anatomy of a good friend10:10 What is an emotionally mature person?12:26 Why are some people stuck in earlier stages of development?13:44 How to get in touch with yourself15:30 The questions that unlock self exploration22:00 Emotional Curriculum24:00 How attachment styles form28:00 Why do we go for people that are good for us29:55 How to heal insecure attachment30:35 How to date successfully35:50 Dating mistakes we make36:50 How long should you wait for intimacy?39:20 Everyone has red flags 42:50 How to make someone fall in love44:40 Why some people are magnetic47:38 Taking successful people off the pedestal50:30 How to solve the loneliness epidemic54:40 Feeling like you never fit in56:00 Attachment styles in friendships58:30 Love reveals your true identity59:53 How do you know you've chosen the right person01:03:09 What lovable people look like01:03:39 Is love enough?01:05:27 How to know if to stay or go in a relationship01:07:12 Why do we sabotage good relationships01:10:05 Not being attracted to your partner01:17:03 How to navigate a breakup

Robert Greene: How To Seduce Anyone, Become Powerful & Irreplaceable 18.02.2026 1h 33m

Robert Greene is one of the most influential authors of our time, known for his bestselling books - The 48 Laws of Power, The art of seduction, and The Laws of Human Nature.00:00 Intro01:43 Book banned in prisons03:10 What is power?05:20 Signs someone is powerful07:45 The 2 most important laws of power10:30 How to become irreplaceable13:00 Why are people more timid in 2026?16:00 The source of your power16:55 How to find your uniqueness and source of power22:30 How Francesca found her passion24:07 How Robert found his calling28:30 Does power look differently for men vs women?33:44 Power archetype36:55 Manipulation techniques43:00 We are all narcissists45:12 What is seduction?47:38 Seduction in politics49:30 Archetypes of seduction54:35 How to become seductive59:40 Anti-seductive qualities01:04:00 Gifts and being generous01:05:45 Charisma vs seduction01:09:40 How childhood affects your love life01:14:10 Don't take anything personally in seduction01:15:12 Modern day seduction01:20:10 Being authentic01:24:35 How to see through people's masks01:29:20 Best advice for people in their 20s vs 30s

Power, happiness, and influence, explained by philosophy - Jonny Thomson 09.02.2026 1h 32m

Jonny Thomson is a British philosopher, author, and educator known for making philosophy practical and accessible. He is the founder of Mini Philosophy, a popular platform that breaks down complex philosophical ideas into clear, relatable insights for everyday life.Check him out: https://miniphilosophy.substack.com/00:00 Intro02:20 What inspired you to study philosophy05:20 How philosophy shows up in our daily lives08:50 Philosophical issues in the modern world13:05 What is power?15:20 How to change someone's mind22:17 4 rules of a good debate34:20 The dizziness of freedom41:22 How to have transformational conversations47:55 How to spot intelligent people53:16 How someone can manipulate you56:30 The dead cat theory58:55 How to make hard choices01:06:45 The serious man01:13:05 The Fig Tree Theory01:16:55 The 3 pillars of happiness01:19:55 The hedonic treadmill01:2315 How to increase your happiness baseline01:16:55 The 3 pillars of happiness01:2315 How to increase your happiness baseline01:25:48 Gratitude Exercise01:26:53 How to cultivate creativity

Trauma Expert: How to Rebuild Self-Identity After Years of Shame - Tim Fletcher 09.01.2026 1h 41m

Tim Fletcher is a researcher and counselor with over 30 years of experience, specialising in the field of Addiction and Complex Trauma recovery. I’m launching a course on FINDING LOVE that explains how to heal unhealthy patterns and find a healthy relationship. Join waitlist here - https://tr.ee/bIUJlW-oyZ1:1 Life Coaching - https://tr.ee/7S2Xi6rtodFREE QUIZ: The 5 Patterns Blocking Healthy Love - https://tr.ee/ZVRec4up_VFREE CBT eBook - https://tr.ee/eziT_m9aymNew Book Waitlist - https://tr.ee/9EWZAp0OZm00:00 Intro02:08 What Is Complex Trauma?08:33 Dissociating As A Trauma Response12:09 Can You See Trauma in Someone's Eyes?17:00 Family Roles Created by Trauma26:15 Why Trauma Creates Deep Shame32:00 Low self worth vs shame34:20 Why Trauma Makes You Feel Like a Burden41:19 Rebuilding Your Identity After Trauma50:10 How Trauma Affects Relationships53:30 How Wound Of Abandonment Ruins Relationships55:05 How To Heal Wound Of Abandonment58:55 Why Trauma Makes You Feel Like You Don’t Belong01:01:39 Feeling Like An Outcast Like A Kid01:05:15 How To Recover From Bullying01:06:46 Trauma & Intimacy01:13:37 Healing Your Intimate Life After Trauma01:20:35 How to Let Go of a Relationship01:24:22 What Is Maladaptive Daydreaming?01:27:25 Scenarios Before Bed01:31:38 The Foundation of Trauma Healing01:37:49 Signs You’re Healing From Trauma

CIA SPY: Seduction Tactics, Lie Detection & Mind Control In Interrogations - Andrew Bustamante 12.12.2025 1h 50m

Andrew Bustamante is a former CIA officer, founder of EverydaySpy.com and the author of his new book Shadow Cell.Find your Spy Superpower: https://yt.everydayspy.com/47eDPPnRead Andrew’s CIA book ‘Shadow Cell’: https://geni.us/ShadowCellBook Follow Andy on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@Andrew-BustamanteExplore Spy School: https://everydayspy.com/ Support Andy's sponsor Axolt Brain: https://axoltbrain.com/andyListen to the podcast: https://youtube.com/@EverydaySpyPodcast00:00 - Intro03:00 - Andy's CIA Book 06:00 - How Andy And His Wife Met10:20 - Dating Someone Outside The CIA14:50 How CIA Recruits People21:20 Andy's Secret Mission25:30 Using A Terrorist Tactic32:18 Going Undercover36:00 The Moral Flexibility Needed In CIA40:40 How He Almost Fell Into A "Honey Trap"45:50 How Honey Trappers Charm Their Targets51:00 CIA Seduction Techniques56:33 Elicitation Exercise01:04:05 How To Read People01:06:29 How To Spot Lies01:09:05 CIA Interrogations01:15:00 Interrogation Techniques01:19:40 Techniques To Reduce Stress 01:31:53 CIA Survival Techniques01:44:45 How To Build Rapport

Instantly Disarm Condescending People (Without Losing Your Cool) - Dr Shade 17.11.2025 1h 24m

Dr Shadé is a behavioural researcher, and award-winning peak performance educator. And her new book Big Trust is coming out the 22nd Jan. https://www.shadezahrai.com/00:00 Intro02:09 Her New Book04:21 How To Master You Mindset09:18 The Key To Behavioural Change11:11 How To Further Your Career13:10 Tricks To Start Speaking With More Confidence16:35 The Humanness Courage Matrix19:47 How To Manage Change29:40 How To Increase Your Magnetism - 2 Types Of Charisma35:40 How To Be A Charismatic Presenter40:00 How To Impress An Interviewer 49:00 The Question About Strengths & Weaknesses58:00 How To Respond To Someone Being Condescending 01:03:20 How To Say No To Your Boss01:06:20 How To Increase Your Credibility At Work 01:15:00 How To Be More Likeable At Work01:18:50 How To Respond When Someone Takes Credit For Your Work

Dr K: The Truth About Incels, "Low Value" Men, & Why You Can't Get A Girlfriend 31.10.2025 1h 47m

Dr. K is a Harvard-trained psychiatrist, co-founder of Healthy Gamer, and the world's leading expert on modern mental health issues. Check out more from Dr.K on the HealthyGamerGG Podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/6VaJwyS2KXxiXqR77jqzmP?si=2fbfbaece86441a4 00:00 Intro 01:44 Dr K's Journey10:50 Struggles With Meditation15:55 What Are The Most Common Problems 21:23 How To Find Your Purpose In Life47:00 Social Anhedonia & Hating Small Talk54:45 How To Get A Girlfriend59:00 How To Boost Charisma01:12:10 How To Not Be Creepy01:21:20 How To Stop Being Boring01:28:13 "Low Value" Men, Black Pill01:35:00 Why There's So Many Incels01:44:00 How To Put This Podcast Into Practice

Childhood Neglect & Feeling Like You Can Never Belong - Anna Runkle 13.10.2025 1h 24m

Anna Runkle, known to over a million people on YouTube as the Crappy Childhood Fairy, helps people heal from the lasting effects of childhood trauma. She is the author of Re-Regulated, and her upcoming book Connectability will be published by Hay House in October 2025.00:00 Intro01:54 Why we struggle with belonging04:42 Childhood trauma hurts your ability to connect10:50 Signs you were ostracised as a kid19:56 Why we self-isolate and how to stop27:10 Obstacles to connection - Covert Avoidance39:22 Why limerence happens to traumatised people50:42 Sensuality and attraction56:11 How to spot a good partner59:30 How to start feeling like you belong01:22:00 How to find your people

Interrogation Expert: How To Influence Anyone & Read People Like A Book 22.09.2025 1h 28m

Chase Hughes is the world’s number one leading authority on behavior profiling, nonverbal communication, influence, and persuasion. His work has long been the go-to training resource for the most elite professionals in human intelligence - including the US Army, and intelligence agencies.

Women, stop looking for "masculine" men - Case Kenny 25.08.2025 56m

Case Kenny is a mindfulness expert, the author of That’s Bold of You, and the host of the popular podcast New Mindset, Who Dis? He has over 1.3M followers on instagram where he shares short affirmations and mantras. His new book The Opposite of Settling is also coming out this year in August.

The Mind Architect: Triggers are gifts from your subconscious - Peter Crone 09.07.2025 54m

Peter Crone, also known as "The Mind Architect”, is a writer, speaker, and thought leader in human potential. With over 20 years of experience, he has coached celebrities, athletes, and high-level leaders. Peter specializes in revealing the limiting beliefs and subconscious narratives that shape behavior, health, relationships, and performance. https://www.petercrone.com/

Dating Expert: Best Technique For Healing After Breakup & Becoming More Attractive On Dates 24.06.2025 56m

Amy Chan is a leading relationship expert and New York Times bestselling author of Breakup Bootcamp. She is also the founder of Renew Breakup Bootcamp and Dating Bootcamp, a transformational retreat designed to help people heal after heartbreak.

Dr Julie Smith: How to Build Social Confidence, Heal After a Breakup & Spot Fake Friends Fast 15.04.2025 1h 16m

Dr Julie Smith is a clinical psychologist, bestselling author and content creator. You’ve probably seen her creative mental health videos on social media where she has over 7 million followers. Her first book, “Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before?” was the bestselling non-fiction book of 2022. Her latest book, Open When…, went straight to number 1 on the Sunday Times bestseller list in its first week.https://www.drjulie.uk/books

#1 Somatic Practitioner: How To Get Out Of Functional Freeze, Clear Brain Fog & Get Your Spark Back 20.03.2025 1h 30m

Today’s guest is Brittany Piper. She is an internationally recognized speaker, author, and Somatic Experiencing Practitioner. In her upcoming book, "Body-First Healing", Brittany offers a revolutionary guide to trauma recovery through healing the nervous system. https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/748686/body-first-healing-by-brittany-piper/

#1 Dating Coach: How avoidants feel after a breakup & how men choose who to marry 24.02.2025 1h 5m

Sabrina Zohar is a dating coach and podcast host with over 2.5M followers across social media channels.

How to Stop Getting Obsessed Too Quickly When Dating & What To Do If They Pull Away– Jillian Turecki 15.01.2025 49m

Jillian Turecki is a relationship coach, teacher, podcaster, writer, and speaker who has devoted her life to helping people revolutionize their relationships with themselves. Order her new book - It Begins With YOU - https://www.jillianturecki.com

Adult Children Of Emotionally Immature Parents - Dr Lindsay Gibson 07.01.2025 1h 26m

Dr. Lindsay Gibson is an author and clinical psychologist who has been a psychotherapist for over 30 years. Her New York Times bestseller, Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents, has sold over 1M copies and has been translated into 37 languages. 00:00 Intro 02:04 Signs you had an emotionally immature parent 05:25 Characteristics of emotionally immature people 09:30 Why are they like this? 11:17 4 types of emotionally immature parents 20:03 Externalizers vs Internalizers 24:00 Healing fantasies with parents 30:27 Healing fantasies in romantic relationships 37:23 How do you know if you’ve been neglected as a child? 45:08 Role Selves 48:50 How to connect to your true self 53:23 How can you avoid getting triggered by an emotionally immature parent? 01:02:05 Feeling Guilty About Your Parents 01:06:35 Adult vs child relationship with your parent 01:12:34 How to get rid of your critical inner voice 01:19:15 How to identify emotionally mature people when dating