Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families
Dr Justin Coulson
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Dr. Justin Coulson's Happy Families podcast offers practical parenting advice for busy parents. Hosted by Justin and his wife Kylie, the show provides common-sense tips and real-life experiences from raising their six daughters. Each episode aims to help families find more happiness and manage household challenges effectively.
Jaksot
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Screens, Kids & the Hijacked Brain: Dr Wayne Warburton on Beating Screen Addiction 15.09.2026 15minIs your child’s screen time spiralling—and every conversation about it ends in a fight? Professor Wayne Warburton, leading psychologist and researcher, reveals how apps and games are deliberately engineered to hook young brains. He explains the hidden neuroscience of addiction, what excessive screen use does to a child’s emotional regulation and attention, and how parents can reclaim calm without all-out war. If you’ve ever wondered why your tween melts down when you say “time’s up,” this episode is a must-listen. KEY POINTS Why modern apps use gambling-style tactics and AI to keep kids scrolling. How heavy screen use weakens the prefrontal cortex—the part of the brain that manages focus, planning, and emotional control. Simple, science-backed steps to reset family screen habits and return kids to the “driver’s seat.” Practical advice for conversations that don’t turn into shouting matches. Why social connection doesn’t have to mean social media. QUOTE OF THE EPISODE“It’s not your child’s fault—or yours. These products are built to be addictive. The goal is to put your child back in the driver’s seat, not the screen.” — Dr Wayne Warburton RESOURCES MENTIONED Dr Wayne Warburton’s books Growing Up Fast and Furious and The Importance of Media Literacy HappyFamilies.com.au for family screen-plan templates and parenting resources ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Choose the right moment: Discuss screens only when everyone is calm and offline. Externalise the problem: Frame it as “us versus the tech designers,” not parent versus child. Co-create a plan: Involve kids in setting screen limits and consequences; write it down. Build healthy replacements: Help kids identify offline ways to cope with boredom, anxiety, or stress. Model balance: Show your own healthy screen habits—your example speaks louder than rules. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
When Your Child Hates the School You Chose [a Listener Q&A] 14.09.2026 13minYou’ve chosen the school you believe is best for your child. There’s just one problem. They absolutely refuse to go. When an 11-year-old is threatening to cut up his uniform and stay home rather than attend the high school his parents have chosen, pushing harder is unlikely to help. Justin and Kylie explain why force creates resistance, what might really be underneath a child’s refusal, and how to have the conversation that could change everything. KEY POINTS Why trying to convince your child you’re right can make them dig in harder The three needs driving your child’s response: connection, competence and autonomy Why feeling heard needs to come before problem-solving How to listen without adding your own interpretation Why writing your child’s concerns down can take the heat out of the conversation How to explain your reasons once your child knows you understand theirs Using trial days and agreed expectations to move forward Why the school that looks best on paper may not be the school where your child thrives QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “Force creates resistance. The harder you push, the harder your kids push back.” RESOURCES MENTIONED Self-Determination Theory Basic Psychological Need Theory Autonomy-supportive parenting ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Stop trying to win the argument. Shift the goal from convincing your child to understanding them. Ask what you’re missing. Give them space to explain every concern without correcting or defending. Write it down. Take their concerns seriously enough to make notes, then repeat them back without adding your interpretation. Wait for the “yes, you get it”. If they’re still correcting you, keep listening. Explain your why. Once they feel understood, share the two or three reasons behind your preferred school. Look for a workable next step. Consider an experience day, trial period or clear agreement about what giving the school a genuine chance will look like. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
5 Things to Stop Saying to Your Kids 13.09.2026 16minSome of the most well-intentioned things we say to our kids can backfire. From “Good job, you’re so smart” to “You’ll be fine” and “Why can’t you be more like your sister?”, Justin and Kylie unpack five common phrases that can undermine confidence, shut down emotions and create distance between parents and kids. More importantly, they share what to say instead to help kids feel understood, capable and connected. KEY POINTS Why too much praise can make kids depend on external validation The hidden cost of saying “I’m disappointed in you” Why “You’ll be fine” can leave a struggling child feeling alone How comparing siblings can fuel conflict and self-doubt Why saying “I was never good at maths either” can create a limiting mindset Simple phrases that build connection without trying to fix everything QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “You need to know that we love you no matter what.” RESOURCES MENTIONED Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child by John Gottman Research by Wolf Meyer on praise and children’s perceptions of ability Research by Eddie Brummelman on inflated praise Research by Avi Assor and Guy Roth on conditional parental regard ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Swap automatic praise for curiosity: “What did you enjoy about that?” Replace disappointment with connection: “We love you no matter what. Let’s work through this.” Validate hard feelings before offering solutions: “This is really tough, isn’t it?” Stop comparing siblings, friends or abilities Replace “We’re just not good at that” with “Let’s work it out” See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
The Greatest Legacy a Dad Can Leave 10.09.2026 15minThe best Father’s Day had almost nothing to do with presents. Justin and Kylie share the unexpectedly beautiful family dinner that turned into stories, tears, terrible dancing and a powerful reminder of what children really take from their dads. As each daughter shared what she loved about Justin, one message kept coming through: the way a father loves his partner can shape what his children expect from love for years to come. KEY POINTS Why gifts and big expectations can make special days fall flat The simple dinner-table tradition that changed the whole night Why telling family members what you love about them matters How old family songs brought childhood memories flooding back The relationship lesson Justin and Kylie’s daughters have absorbed from watching their parents Why strong family bonds can add to our lives rather than restrict them QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “The greatest legacy you as their dad have given them already is the way you love me.” RESOURCES MENTIONED “Blue Hotel” by Chris Isaak “Cinderella” by Steven Curtis Chapman “We Will Rock You” by Queen ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Tell your partner and children something specific you love about them. Bring back a song, ritual or tradition your family has let slip. Create time together that isn’t centred around buying things. Consider what your children are learning about relationships by watching yours. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
Why Overthinking Decisions Makes Us Less Happy 09.09.2026 16minMore choice should make us happier. Turns out, it often does the opposite. Whether it’s choosing a movie, buying a pair of jeans or helping your child pick school subjects, searching for the absolute best option can leave us anxious, regretful and less satisfied with what we eventually choose. Justin and Kylie unpack the psychology of maximising versus satisficing and what the research reveals about decision-making. They explore why “good enough” can sometimes make us happier, how too many choices affect kids, and how to know when a decision deserves serious thought and when it’s time to stop searching. KEY POINTS The difference between maximisers and satisficers Why finding the “best” option doesn’t always make us happier How too many choices can increase regret and dissatisfaction Why kids often benefit from fewer options How to decide what “good enough” looks like before you start searching Which decisions deserve more time and which ones don’t How parents can model confident decision-making QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “If you can decide what’s going to be good enough before you start the search, then once you find it, you can stop the search.” RESOURCES MENTIONED Herbert Simon’s concept of “satisficing” Research by Sheena Iyengar, Barry Schwartz and Jonathan Wells on maximising and decision-making ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Shrink the choice. Give children two or three options instead of an endless list. Set the standard first. Decide what “good enough” looks like before searching. Say it out loud. Let your kids hear you say, “This works. I’m happy with this choice.” Match the effort to the decision. University choices deserve more thought than what to eat for dinner. Notice decision avoidance. Ask whether you’re still searching for a better answer or because committing to one feels uncomfortable. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
Derek McCormack on Parental Stress and Burnout 08.09.2026 17minParents have more advice, information and expert guidance than ever before. So why are so many feeling stressed, isolated and burnt out? More than 10,000 Australian parents took part in the Parenting Today study, revealing a worrying decline in wellbeing, self-compassion and connection. Justin speaks with Derek McCormick, Director of Raising Children Network, about what's putting parents under so much pressure and whether the constant stream of parenting advice is part of the problem. They unpack information overload, social media, AI, loneliness and the one simple shift that can help when parenting feels like too much. KEY POINTS What more than 10,000 Australian parents revealed about parenting today Why having more parenting information hasn't necessarily made parenting easier How social media and influencers can leave good parents feeling like they're getting it wrong Why trusted information matters, but information alone isn't enough The importance of real-world connection and peer support Why keeping communication open with your kids matters more than pushing them to talk How AI is changing where parents go for advice Why self-compassion is a practical tool for overwhelmed parents QUOTE OF THE EPISODE "Do I talk to myself the way I would talk to a good friend?"Derek McCormick RESOURCES MENTIONED Raising Children Network Parenting Today study from the Parenting Research Centre MyTime peer support groups Happy Families Burnt Out webinar (included in the Happy Families membership) ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Audit where your parenting advice is coming from. Choose sources you genuinely trust. Notice which accounts, reels or advice leave you feeling inadequate. Give yourself permission to unfollow. Talk to yourself with the same kindness you'd offer a struggling friend. Reach out to someone you trust instead of carrying the hard parts of parenting alone. Focus on creating a relationship where your child feels safe bringing problems to you. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
Why Restricting Party Treats Can Backfire [a Listener Q&A] 07.09.2026 14minYour child is standing in front of a party table loaded with cake, lollies and soft drink. Do you step in or let them go for it? Justin and Kylie’s answer might surprise you: let the party be the party. Research suggests that tightly restricting treats can make kids want them even more. Instead of policing every mouthful, this episode explores how parents can help kids build genuine self-control, trust around food and the ability to notice when their body has had enough. KEY POINTS Why restricting treats can make them more desirable The problem with policing what kids eat at parties Why healthy food habits are built at home, not beside the lolly table How trust helps kids develop their own self-control Why parents can decide what food is offered while kids decide whether and how much they eat How to help kids recognise their body's signals Why the best teaching moment may come after the party QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “The child who is calm around the lolly table got there by being trusted around food when it wasn't a big deal.” RESOURCES MENTIONED Fisher and Birch research on restricting children's access to palatable foods Walter Mischel's Marshmallow Experiment and the 2018 replication study Ellyn Satter's Division of Responsibility in Feeding ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Let parties be parties. One afternoon of cake and lollies isn't going to determine your child's health. Build everyday habits at home. Offer nutritious options without turning food into a constant battle. Take the drama out of treats. Avoid making sugary food forbidden, precious or unusually exciting. Give your child some control. Let them practise deciding how much they want to eat. Talk afterwards. If they come home feeling sick or uncomfortable, help them connect how they feel with what they ate rather than lecturing them at the party. Teach body awareness. Help them notice hunger, fullness and how different foods make them feel. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
What Your Child Is Being Taught About Gender at School [with Clare Rowe] 06.09.2026 23minDo you actually know what your child is being taught about gender and identity at school? Child and adolescent psychologist Clare Rowe says many parents have no idea what is being introduced in classrooms, particularly in the early primary years. She joins Justin to unpack what she believes is a growing gap between what children are being taught and what they are developmentally ready to understand. They discuss gender identity education, the role of schools versus parents, what Clare is seeing in her psychology practice, and why she believes parents need greater transparency about classroom content. Most importantly, Clare explains how parents can find out exactly what their school is teaching without starting a fight. KEY POINTS Why Clare believes some gender concepts are being introduced too early The difference between teaching inclusion and introducing complex ideas about identity Why young children can struggle with abstract concepts What Clare is seeing among children presenting with gender distress The concern around moving young people quickly towards medical interventions Why parents may not know what outside providers are teaching at school How to ask your school for lesson plans and curriculum information without becoming confrontational QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “Get curious, not furious.” RESOURCES MENTIONED Clare Rowe and Rowe & Associates Child and Family Psychology The Rowe Report On the Couch with Clare Respectful Relationships programs Happy Families ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Ask your school what your child is being taught about sex, gender and identity. Request lesson plans, curriculum details and information about any third-party providers. Find out when this content will be taught so you can talk about it at home. Approach the school calmly and ask questions before drawing conclusions. Consider approaching the school with two or three other parents if you feel more comfortable doing it together. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
Millenial Dads (When Mum Goes Away) 03.09.2026 14minWhat if trying to create the perfect family moment is the very thing getting in the way? After a week away with three of their daughters, Kylie realised she’d arrived with a clear picture of how their time together should look. The reality was completely different. And it turned out to be better. Justin and Kylie unpack the pressure parents put on themselves to get the “recipe” right, why our kids need room to make their own choices, and how letting go of control can create more connection. Justin also shares what happened when Kylie left him juggling work and parenting, including one spectacular diary fail, and why simple, low-pressure time together can be some of the best parenting we do. KEY POINTS Why parenting doesn’t come with a guaranteed recipe for happy, successful kids How expectations can turn good family experiences into disappointments Why giving kids space can lead to more openness and connection The power of simple, unstructured time with your child Why presence, patience and understanding often matter more than elaborate plans - Justin’s lesson in juggling work and parenting when Kylie went away QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “It’s the simple stuff that makes our families work the best.” RESOURCES MENTIONED What Your Child Needs From You by Justin Coulson ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Notice where you’ve created a “recipe” for how family life should look. Leave room for your child to choose how they experience a moment. Swap one carefully planned activity for simple time together. Focus less on monitoring and more on creating a relationship where your child wants to talk to you. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
AI Is Making Real Relationships Feel Harder 02.09.2026 11minAI never gets annoyed with you. It rarely pushes back. And it’s very good at telling you exactly what you want to hear. New research suggests that this constant validation may come with a cost. After just three weeks of interacting with sycophantic AI, people were more likely to seek personal advice from AI and reported feeling less satisfied with their real-world relationships. Many preferred the agreeable AI because it made them feel understood. Justin and Kylie unpack what this means for kids growing up with AI as a confidant, adviser and sounding board. Real relationships involve disagreement, compromise and uncomfortable conversations. If AI removes that friction, are our kids missing the chance to learn how to handle it? KEY POINTS Why AI is designed to feel validating, agreeable and supportive How constant affirmation can reinforce our existing point of view Why people may start preferring AI advice to conversations with family and friends The risk of using AI as a therapist during relationship conflict Why disagreement and friction are important relationship skills How parents can help kids use AI without outsourcing their thinking or relationships QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “Sycophantic AI is making our human interactions harder and less satisfying.” RESOURCES MENTIONED Research paper: Sycophantic AI Makes Human Interaction Feel More Effortful and Less Satisfying Over Time ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Explain “sycophancy” to your kids and show them how AI can agree with and validate the person prompting it. Encourage kids to question AI responses rather than treating them as neutral advice. Be cautious about using AI to decide who is right during friendship or family conflict. Help kids practise disagreement, compromise and repair with real people. Model curiosity when challenged instead of immediately defending your position. Keep talking. A real conversation may be messier than AI, but learning to navigate that mess matters. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
Gaming & Neurodivergence: How to Make Gaming Healthier at Home [with Andrew Kinch] 01.09.2026 17minGaming can be a source of connection, competence and joy, especially for neurodivergent kids. But when switching off leads to arguments, anxiety or explosive behaviour, parents need more than another screen-time rule. Justin speaks with Game Aware founder Andrew Kinch about why some kids are drawn so strongly to gaming, how neurodivergence can shape that relationship, and what parents can do when gaming starts crowding out sleep, school, movement and family life. They unpack the difference between gaming for enjoyment and gaming for escape, why timers can make transitions harder, and how understanding your child's favourite game could reduce conflict at home. KEY POINTS: Why gaming and general screen time aren't the same thing The particular role gaming can play for neurodivergent kids How gaming meets needs for competence, autonomy and connection Why using games to escape stress, bullying, anxiety or other struggles can become problematic Why countdown timers can increase anxiety around switching off How a stopwatch can encourage kids to practise self-regulation The value of a calming "buffer" activity after gaming Why parents should spend time learning how their child's favourite game actually works How understanding what your child gets from gaming can change the conversation at home QUOTE OF THE EPISODE:"What job is the game doing for them?"Andrew Kinch RESOURCES MENTIONED: Game Aware Activity Finder and family support Self-Determination Theory Johann Hari's work on addiction and connection ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS: Get curious about what gaming gives your child before focusing on how long they're playing. Notice whether they're gaming for fun and connection or using it to escape something difficult. Try replacing a countdown timer with a stopwatch that helps them monitor their own gaming time. Plan something enjoyable or calming for immediately after gaming rather than expecting an abrupt switch into chores or family demands. Sit beside your child and learn their game. Understand what they're trying to achieve, when a round ends and why stopping halfway through can feel so frustrating. If gaming is seriously affecting sleep, school, relationships, physical activity or safety at home, seek specialised support. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
How to Handle Dating in the Tween Years [a Listener Q&A] 31.08.2026 14minYour 12-year-old announces they’re dating someone. There’s hand-holding, constant texting and plenty of “love you” messages. Do you shut it down, set rules or stay out of it? Justin and Kylie unpack early teenage romance and why keeping your child talking to you matters more than trying to monitor every interaction. They explain what “dating” often means at this age, how to protect friendships and school life, and how to set boundaries without pushing the relationship underground. KEY POINTS Romantic interest commonly ramps up around ages 11 to 12. Before reacting, ask your child what “dating” actually means to them. Open disclosure from your child is more valuable than trying to monitor everything they do. Watch whether the relationship starts replacing friendships, activities or school responsibilities. Trying to ban the relationship completely may simply push it underground. Talk about what respectful relationships look like, including helping the other person feel safe and strong. QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “As long as you can have an open dialogue, then you have influence.” RESOURCES MENTIONED Developmental psychology research on early adolescent romantic relationships Research by Stattin and Kerr on parental monitoring and child disclosure Happy Families website and podcast question submission ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Get curious first. Ask what “dating” means to your child before deciding how worried you need to be. Keep them talking. Protect the relationship that makes your child comfortable telling you what’s happening. Set clear expectations. Explain your family’s boundaries around dating without turning the conversation into command and control. Watch the bigger picture. Notice changes in friendships, schoolwork, extracurricular activities and family life. Talk about respect. Teach your child what it means to make another person feel safe, respected and valued. Try side-by-side conversations. A walk, drive or other low-pressure moment can make sensitive conversations easier. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
Can We Ban Laptops From Primary School? 30.08.2026 17minWe put laptops and tablets into classrooms with a promise that technology would improve education. Nearly two decades later, parents and teachers are asking a confronting question: Did we get it wrong? Justin speaks with Danny Alachi, founder of the Heads Up Alliance, and Victorian high school teacher Steph Challis about the push to reduce screen use in Australian schools. They unpack classroom distraction, declining literacy, the value of handwriting and physical books, and why teaching digital skills doesn’t require kids to spend every lesson behind a screen. They also explain a new national petition calling for no one-to-one devices in primary schools, books and paper to become the default in high school, a pause on generative AI in classrooms, safer evidence-based educational apps, and a renewed focus on reading and handwriting. KEY POINTS Why one-to-one devices may be doing more harm than good in primary classrooms The distraction problem teachers are seeing when laptops are open Why books, handwriting and paper still matter for learning The difference between teaching digital literacy and teaching through a screen Why technology should have to prove it improves learning before schools adopt it The five changes the Heads Up Alliance wants Australian schools to make QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “Schools need to remember what they're for. They're there to teach children how to learn.” Steph Challis RESOURCES MENTIONED Heads Up Alliance Sign the petition ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Look at how devices are being used in your child’s classroom, not simply whether they are being used. Ask your school when screens genuinely improve learning and when books, paper and handwriting could work better. Read the petition and sign it if you support the proposed changes. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
Stop Trying to Create the Perfect Family 27.08.2026 13minWhat if trying to create the perfect family moment is the very thing getting in the way? After a week away with three of their daughters, Kylie realised she’d arrived with a clear picture of how their time together should look. The reality was completely different. And it turned out to be better. Justin and Kylie unpack the pressure parents put on themselves to get the “recipe” right, why our kids need room to make their own choices, and how letting go of control can create more connection. Justin also shares what happened when Kylie left him juggling work and parenting, including one spectacular diary fail, and why simple, low-pressure time together can be some of the best parenting we do. KEY POINTS Why parenting doesn’t come with a guaranteed recipe for happy, successful kids How expectations can turn good family experiences into disappointments Why giving kids space can lead to more openness and connection The power of simple, unstructured time with your child Why presence, patience and understanding often matter more than elaborate plans - Justin’s lesson in juggling work and parenting when Kylie went away QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “It’s the simple stuff that makes our families work the best.” RESOURCES MENTIONED What Your Child Needs From You by Justin Coulson ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Notice where you’ve created a “recipe” for how family life should look. Leave room for your child to choose how they experience a moment. Swap one carefully planned activity for simple time together. Focus less on monitoring and more on creating a relationship where your child wants to talk to you. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
The Baby Screen Habit Parents Need to Break 26.08.2026 17minOne in three babies is using a phone or tablet by six months old. By age two, almost one in ten is averaging around four hours of screen time a day. New research into screen use during the first years of life has landed with a confronting warning for parents. Justin and Kylie unpack what researchers call “digital soothing”, why screens can crowd out the interactions babies need for healthy development, and what parents can do when zero screen time feels almost impossible. KEY POINTS 16% of Australian three and four year olds had recently used TikTok, YouTube or Instagram. More than half of children are using phones or tablets by their first birthday. Why researchers are concerned about using screens to soothe, comfort and entertain babies. How screens can replace the face-to-face “serve and return” interactions that build language and thinking skills. Higher screen exposure in the early years is linked with poorer sleep, delayed language and cognitive development, weaker social skills and poorer later school performance. Why watching together is different from leaving a young child alone with a device. QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “The first thousand days build the brain. Work hard to get that right.” RESOURCES MENTIONED eSafety Commissioner’s Growing Up Online report Jonathan Haidt’s After Babel Substack New systematic review of global research into screen use during the first 1,001 days of life ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Aim for as close to zero screen time as possible during the first two years. Don’t rely on a device as your child’s regular comforter or distraction. Prioritise talking, playing, moving and face-to-face interaction. When screen time does happen, watch and engage together rather than handing over the device. Look at what screen time is replacing, not only what your child is watching. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
What Every Girl Needs to Know About Porn [with Kristen Jenson] 25.08.2026 17minPornography isn’t just a boys’ issue. Girls are seeing it too, often before their parents realise they need to talk about it. Kristen Jenson, founder of Defend Young Minds and author of Good Pictures, Bad Pictures Guide for Girls, joins Justin to explain why girls need to be part of this conversation. They unpack accidental exposure, curiosity, body image, objectification and the shame that can stop girls from asking for help. Most importantly, Kristen gives parents a simple way to prepare kids before pornography finds them: give them a definition, a warning and a plan. KEY POINTS Why treating pornography as a boys-only problem leaves girls vulnerable How shame around girls’ curiosity can make the problem harder to talk about Why accidental exposure can happen before kids actively seek explicit content The impact pornography can have on girls’ body image and self-worth Why parental controls and filters can’t replace conversations Kristen’s simple three-part approach: a definition, a warning and a plan Why your reaction matters if your child tells you they’ve seen pornography How to start the conversation even if your child is already a teenager QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “It’s never too late to give your kids a defense.”Kristen Jenson RESOURCES MENTIONED Good Pictures, Bad Pictures Guide for Girls by Kristen Jenson Defend Young Minds Brain Defense Digital Safety Curriculum Common Sense Media’s Teens and Pornography report ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Have the conversation before your child gets their own internet-connected device. Give your child an age-appropriate definition of pornography so they can recognise it. Explain why pornography can be harmful without using fear or shame. Give them a clear plan for what to do if explicit content appears. Make sure they know they can tell you without automatically losing their device or getting into trouble. If your older child has already seen pornography, listen first. Make it a conversation, not a lecture. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
Why Kids Lie and What to Do About It (a Listener Q&A) 24.08.2026 16minYour five-year-old tells a whopping great lie at Show and Tell. Do you correct them, call them out, or let it go? Lying can push every parental button, but for young kids, stretching the truth can be a surprisingly normal sign of cognitive development. Justin and Kylie explain why kids lie, what their tall tales might be trying to tell us, and why cracking down can make children better at hiding the truth. The goal isn't to catch your child out. It's to understand what they need and make honesty safe. KEY POINTS By age four, around 80% of children will lie in experimental settings. Convincing lies require "theory of mind", the ability to understand what another person thinks or believes. Sometimes exaggeration is less about dishonesty and more about wanting connection, belonging, competence, or status. Punitive responses can encourage children to become better at lying rather than more honest. Avoid fact-checking or embarrassing your child in the moment. Give kids an "off-ramp" from a lie by asking curious questions instead of accusing them. Build the skills and relationships underneath the story so your child doesn't need to exaggerate to feel valued. QUOTE OF THE EPISODE "Kids tell the truth when it's safe to tell the truth." RESOURCES MENTIONED Theory of mind and children's cognitive development Research on lying and child development Happy Families resources on helping kids build friendships ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Stay calm. A young child's lie isn't automatically a red flag. Look underneath it. Ask whether your child is seeking connection, competence, attention, or belonging. Don't shame or ridicule them. Especially in front of other people. Give them an off-ramp. Try, "Which parts did you do?" rather than catching them out. Make honesty safe. Harsh punishment can make telling the truth feel too costly. Build real competence. Help them practise the skill so next time they can proudly say, "I did it myself." See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
Enhanced Games (and Why Failure Might Be Your Child’s Best Teacher!) 23.08.2026 15minEveryone wants the shortcut. Better results, less effort, faster success. But what happens when the shortcut fails? The Enhanced Games promised superhuman athletic performances through performance-enhancing drugs. Instead, the results offered a surprising lesson for parents and kids. Justin and Kylie unpack our obsession with hacks, optimisation and instant success, and explain why real achievement is usually built through something far less exciting: repetition, mistakes, patience and showing up again. KEY POINTS Why the Enhanced Games became a lesson in the limits of shortcuts The growing culture of hacks, optimisation and instant results What elite athletes understand about boredom, repetition and mastery Why failure is part of becoming genuinely good at something How online influencers sell boys shortcuts to looks, wealth and status Why doing the work matters as much as reaching the goal What parents can teach kids about consistency when progress feels slow QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “It’s not actually about getting there, it’s about who you become while you’re getting there.” RESOURCES MENTIONED Atomic Habits by James Clear How to Live by Derek Sivers The Enhanced Games Michael Jordan’s reflections on failure and success ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Praise practice, persistence and improvement rather than quick wins. Let your child struggle with something long enough to learn from their mistakes. Talk about the shortcuts and “hacks” they see online and what those promises leave out. Help kids see repetition as part of mastery, not proof that they lack talent. When they make a mistake, ask what they know now that they didn’t know before. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
The Reading Crisis Hitting Aussie Kids 20.08.2026 11minOne in three Australian kids is struggling to read at the expected level. In a classroom of 30, that’s 10 children falling behind. Justin speaks with Rachel Amorosakra from Reading Out of Poverty about what poor literacy looks like for kids, why access to books in the first five years matters so much, and the confronting reality for children in remote communities who may not own a single book. With Book Week approaching, they look at a practical way families can help put culturally appropriate books into the hands of children in East Arnhem Land. KEY POINTS One in three Australian children is not meeting grade-level expectations in reading. Struggling to read affects far more than English. It can make maths, science and other subjects harder too. Falling behind can leave children embarrassed, disengaged and believing they simply aren't smart. The first five years are critical for building vocabulary, imagination and early literacy skills. Books create connection between children and caregivers, not just reading skills. Many children in remote East Arnhem Land communities have little access to books. Reading Out of Poverty is providing culturally appropriate literacy packs to children this Book Week. QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “Books aren't just about the reading itself. It's about building connection with parents and caregivers.” RESOURCES MENTIONED Reading Out of Poverty Book Week Reading Out of Poverty literacy packs for children in East Arnhem Land Each $25 donation funds one literacy pack containing five age-appropriate books and educational resources. ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Read with your child regularly, especially during the early years. Make books easy to reach and part of everyday family life. Let young children choose books they want to hear again and again. Use stories as time to connect, talk and explore ideas together. This Book Week, consider donating a literacy pack to help a child in East Arnhem Land access books of their own. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. -
How Birth Order Affects Your Future 19.08.2026 14minFirstborns tend to earn more, study longer and experience better mental health than their younger siblings. For decades, researchers have struggled to explain why. A huge study following 1.2 million Danish children has uncovered a surprising piece of the puzzle. It may have less to do with personality or favouritism and more to do with germs, early illness and the extra time firstborns get with their parents. In this episode, Justin and Kylie unpack what birth order research actually tells us, why the first six months matter so much, and the simple things parents can do to help level the playing field. KEY POINTS Firstborns show small but consistent advantages in earnings, education and mental health across large population studies. Younger siblings are more likely to be exposed to respiratory illnesses during their first year, often brought home by older siblings. Early illness may explain a significant portion of the birth order gap. Firstborns can receive thousands more hours of reading, talking and playing with parents by age 13. Birth order is not destiny. These findings describe population averages, not what will happen to an individual child. Parents can reduce some of these differences through illness prevention, connection and intentional one-on-one time. QUOTE OF THE EPISODE “Your youngest child is not doomed, your eldest is not blessed.” RESOURCES MENTIONED Article in The Washington ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS Keep recommended immunisations up to date and discuss newborn protection with your healthcare provider. Breastfeed if you can and if it works for your family. Get older siblings washing their hands when they come home from school or daycare. Keep sick siblings away from newborns, particularly during the first six months. Make space for one-on-one reading, talking and play with younger children. Forget the stopwatch. Aim to be available and connected rather than trying to divide your attention perfectly equally. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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