That's Where I'm At

Jaksot

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  EP 101: From People-Pleasing to Self-Trust with Melanie Gore 30.09.2026 52min

  At a San Francisco beach, Melanie Gore thought she was having a panic attack—until the feeling turned into laughter, and she recognized joy she'd never felt before. On That's Where I'm At, host Laura interviews Melanie, a Certified Hypnotherapist, Women's Confidence Specialist, RTT Practitioner, and Life Coach who helps women overcome anxiety, codependency, narcissistic relationships, limiting beliefs, and ADHD-related emotional challenges. Melanie shares her own transformation through RTT and how it inspired her to help women rebuild confidence, trust themselves, and create lives they genuinely love. Together, Laura and Melanie explore childhood patterns, codependency, rediscovering your identity, and practical ways to build self-trust through small, everyday changes.   Key Topics & Timestamps Introduction and content warning (00:00:00) Melanie describes choosing positivity and going with life's changes; Laura introduces the podcast and warns about potentially triggering topics. Melanie's path to hypnotherapy and personal growth (00:01:31) Melanie explains how codependency, self-help, and therapy led her to train in Rapid Transformational Therapy and help others. Recognizing codependency and rebuilding self-worth (00:04:29) Melanie discusses childhood patterns, people-pleasing, and learning to accept herself rather than seek others' approval. Boundaries, identity, and narcissistic relationship patterns (00:13:05) They explore self-love, repeated relationship dynamics, shifting goalposts, and the value of time alone to rediscover identity. Midlife freedom, confidence, and starting over (00:18:18)  Laura and Melanie reflect on reclaiming personal choices, trying new things, and building a life that feels authentic. Recognizing abuse and deciding what comes next (00:23:06) Melanie shares how she discovered joy and emphasizes readiness, self-trust, and choosing whether to remain in an unhealthy relationship. Living alone and rediscovering interests (00:29:54) They discuss fear of loneliness, rebuilding friendships and hobbies, and treating discomfort or experimentation as opportunities to grow. Therapy tools and practical self-support strategies (00:35:09) Melanie describes her RTT process, inner-child work, self-affirmation, journaling, and practicing kinder self-talk. Changing thought patterns and setting boundaries (00:38:06) Melanie outlines ways to challenge old beliefs, trust intuition, communicate confidently, and avoid absorbing hurtful comments. Childhood patterns, parenting, and family healing (00:43:18) They discuss changing inherited behaviors, apologizing to adult children, and allowing family members to do their own healing. Where to find Melanie and episode closing (00:50:01) Laura shares Melanie's website and social links, recommends RTT, thanks her guest, and closes the podcast.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Melanie, "I was trying to fit in in a way that other people would accept me. And when I got to the place of 'I'm okay with who I am, I like who I am, I'm a good person,' then I started to blossom." Melanie, "You end up with no sense of who you are left. You're just like this empty vessel, and you're trying so hard to understand why you can never get it right." Melanie, "The biggest shift, I think, is when you get to spend some time on your own and get to decide who you are and who you want to be." Melanie, "That first third was kind of my parents. The second third was my kids. And now this part is for me. And that's exciting." Melanie Gore, "You're not a different person. You've just started to find out who you are."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/book-store JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517 FOLLOW MELANIE: WEBSITE: www.melaniegore.com INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/transformational_hypnosis FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/MelanieGoreHypnotherapy YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@MelanieGore-ConfidenceCoach   "Reclaiming yourself begins when you find the courage to name your truth and choose your own path."   This podcast and its contents may not be used for training or developing AI systems without permission.   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
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  EP 100: Escaping High-Control Religion and Abusive Marriages: Tia Levings' Journey of Recovery, Writing, and Hope 23.09.2026 55min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura interviews Tia Levings, a New York Times bestselling author of A Well-Trained Wife, her memoir of escaping Christian patriarchy, and I Belong to Me: A Survivor's Guide to Recovery and Hope after Religious Trauma. Tia shares her journey of escaping abusive marriages and a high-control religious environment rooted in strict gender roles and fundamentalism. Tia writes about religious trauma, evangelical patriarchy, and the Trad Wife movement, helping decode the fundamentalist influences that shape news and culture. Her work and insights have been featured in Teen Vogue, Salon, Newsweek, and HuffPost, and she has appeared as a speaker, podcast guest, and on the Amazon docu-series Shiny Happy People. During the conversation, Tia discusses "author divorce," career sabotage, and the importance of having accurate language to name and understand trauma. She emphasizes that recovery is a gradual process that requires community, boundaries, and self-reclamation. Based in Raleigh, North Carolina, Tia is a mother of four adult children and continues to support survivors through her writing, speaking, and advocacy.   Key Topics & Timestamps Podcast Introduction (00:00:30) Host Laura introduces the podcast's mission to share women's stories of healing from toxic relationships and secrets. Trigger Warning (00:01:19) A brief announcement warns listeners that the episode's content may be triggering and advises them to take care. Guest Introduction: Tia (00:01:28) Host Laura introduces guest Tia, a New York Times bestselling author and survivor of religious trauma and domestic abuse. The "Author Divorce" and Career Sabotage (00:02:34) Tia discusses how her success as an author led to her second divorce, a phenomenon she calls "author divorce." Finding Freedom After Leaving (00:08:20) The host and guest discuss the immense freedom and clarity they felt after leaving their abusive partners and toxic environments. Tia's Early Life and Religious Indoctrination (00:13:50) Tia describes her childhood, moving from a culturally Christian background to a high-control megachurch and fundamentalist subculture. Marriage, Abuse, and Escape (00:19:37) Tia recounts her quick marriage, the immediate onset of abuse, and her eventual escape from a church-sanctioned domestic abuse situation. The Healing Journey and "I Belong to Me" (00:23:38) Tia explains the importance of rebuilding oneself after trauma and the premise of her second book on healing. Navigating Covert Abuse (00:26:46) The discussion covers the insidious nature of covert psychological abuse and the difficulty in recognizing and unpacking its impact. Healing with Adult Children (00:29:28) The host and guest share experiences of apologizing to their children for past indoctrination and finding healing in their relationships. Setting Spiritual Boundaries (00:34:32) Tia explains why she keeps her current spiritual beliefs private, offering a boundary for those deconstructing their faith. Writing "A Well-Trained Wife" (00:41:45) Tia details the decade-long process of writing her memoir, driven by the rise of Christian nationalism under Trump. The Power of Naming Abuse (00:44:10) The conversation highlights how having the language to name experiences like narcissistic abuse is a crucial first step toward healing. Who Should Read "I Belong to Me" (00:50:38) Tia explains that her second book, while titled with "religious trauma," is for anyone healing from high-control or toxic relationships.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Tia, "The minute I walked out, I felt like a dog that somebody opened the gate for, and I started running." Tia, "Now I am just free. It's so much peace that my creative fountain is overflowing, and I can get my work done." Tia, "I used to think I suffered from a lot of imposter syndrome, and it turned out, no, I just lived with somebody who continually moved the goalposts." Tia, "I remembered who I was before they told me who I had to be." Tia, "Language has been the number one thing, I think, that's helped me more than anything else—just having the accurate names for my experiences."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/book-store ALL BOOKS BY MY GUESTS: https://www.amazon.com/shop/lauranarcissistawareness/list/27V6DP1K008NA?ref_=aip_sf_list_spv_ons_mixed_d JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517 FOLLOW TIA: WEBSITE: https://tialevings.com INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/tialevingswriter FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/TiaLevingsWriter YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@theworkingwriterpodcast3510/   "Reclaiming yourself begins when you find the courage to name your truth and choose your own path."   This podcast and its contents may not be used for training or developing AI systems without permission.   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
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  EP 99: Shattering Silence: Darlene Lekowski's Journey from Pain to Purpose and Advocacy 16.09.2026 52min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura interviews Darlene Lekowski, an Amazon bestselling author, motivational speaker, and business leader who transformed decades of silence into a powerful platform for truth, healing, and advocacy. Darlene shares how she endured sibling sexual trauma and abuse from two brothers between the ages of 7 and 12, carrying the experience in silence for 50 years due to shame and threats. After finding her voice and revealing the truth in 2021, Darlene faced a civil lawsuit brought against her by one of her brothers and ultimately prevailed in the case in 2024. She shares how therapy, writing, and speaking helped her navigate her healing journey and reclaim her voice. Her memoir, Shattering Silence: A Story of Survival, Justice and the Power of Telling the Truth, became an Amazon Best Seller and #1 New Release in multiple categories and is available in print, ebook, and audiobook narrated in her own voice. Today, Darlene speaks to corporate, leadership, and survivor audiences, encouraging others to let go of the silence, reclaim their voice, and Live Forward with courage, resilience, and agency.   Key Topics & Timestamps Podcast Introduction (00:00:39) Host Laura introduces the podcast's mission to break the silence around women's stories and promote healing through sharing. Content Warning (00:01:28) A brief warning is given to listeners about potentially triggering subjects discussed in the episode. Introducing Darlene Markowski (00:01:37) The host introduces guest Darlene Markowski, an author and speaker who survived sibling sexual trauma and abuse. Why Darlene Broke Her Silence (00:03:27) Darlene explains why she kept her abuse a secret for 50 years, citing shame and threats from her brothers. The Impact of Trauma (00:06:06) Darlene discusses living with undiagnosed C-PTSD and how trauma manifested throughout her life, leading to control and perfectionism. Survival Strategies as a Child (00:09:06) Darlene shares the strategies she developed as a child to survive, such as becoming a tomboy and being athletic. The Catalyst for Speaking Out (00:15:25) After her mother's death, a text argument with her brother Don led to Darlene finally revealing the abuse. First Disclosures of Abuse (00:18:45) Darlene recounts the first times she told anyone about the abuse, including her boyfriend at 17 and friends. The Prevalence of Sibling Sexual Abuse (00:24:51) Darlene highlights how common sibling sexual abuse is, emphasizing the need for parents to talk to their children. Telling Her Children (00:27:43) Darlene shares her fear of telling her children about the abuse and their surprisingly understanding and supportive reaction. Confronting Her Brothers (00:30:47) Darlene describes confronting both of her abusive brothers, one of whom initially confessed before recanting his statement. The Defamation Lawsuit (00:33:24) Her brother Don sues Darlene for defamation after she reveals the abuse, leading to a two-and-a-half-year legal battle. The Trial and Verdict (00:36:58) Darlene recounts the six-day trial where a jury unanimously found her truthful, winning both her case and countersuit. The Healing Journey (00:38:10) Darlene realizes the legal victory didn't heal her, prompting her to write her book and focus on releasing her anger. Finding the Right Support (00:41:40) The importance of finding trauma-informed therapy, joining survivor groups, and exploring various healing modalities is discussed. Darlene's Advocacy Work (00:47:36) Darlene talks about her public speaking, where she shares her story with survivors, corporate leaders, and university students. Where to Find Darlene (00:50:25) Darlene shares her website, DarleneSpeaksUp.com, and social media handles for listeners who want to connect with her.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Darlene, "I had two brothers who sexually abused me from the ages of 7 to 12. I hid it, kept it in a box for 50 years." Darlene, "I had kept it in a box. I thought I was good, but the box always leaks. Trauma always finds you." Darlene, "I was so ashamed because I froze. I didn't understand that freezing is a solid, research-founded trauma response. I blamed myself." Darlene, "In less than an hour, a unanimous jury of 12 decided I was telling the truth, he was lying, and I won both cases." Darlene, "Don't give up on yourself. Focus on you. So many of us focus on what happened to us or the person that did this to us."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/book-store JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517 FOLLOW DARLENE: WEBSITE: https://www.darlenespeaksup.com/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/darlenelekowski/ FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/people/Darlene-Lekowski/61575781889793/ LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/darlene-lekowski-0ba1962/ BOOK: "Shattering Silence" Amazon Link: https://a.co/d/0eNNvFjC   "Your truth can become the voice that helps others heal."   This podcast and its contents may not be used for training or developing AI systems without permission.   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
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  EP 98: From Silence to Strength: Christine's Journey Through Coercive Control, Gaslighting, and Healing 09.09.2026 56min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura interviews Christine, author of The Truth She Showed Me, her personal story of surviving 17 years of coercive control and gaslighting. Christine is also the Director of a Fortune 500 company and holds an MBA, yet behind the success and accomplishments, she endured years of manipulation, isolation, and abuse that were invisible to those around her. Christine shares her journey from silence to speaking out, describing the early warning signs, escalating control, and trauma bond that kept her trapped. She reflects on the healing process, the importance of naming abuse, and how writing her book helped validate the experiences of others. Together, Laura and Christine emphasize that coercive control doesn't have a look, leaving is complex, healing is possible, and breaking the silence around abuse is essential.   Key Topics & Timestamps Creating Awareness Through Shared Stories (00:00:00) Christine discusses creating a movement of awareness around coercive control through sharing stories and videos to help people self-diagnose. Podcast Introduction (00:00:35) Host Laura introduces the "That's Where I'm At" podcast, its purpose, and her personal experience with a narcissist. Content Warning (00:01:24) A brief content warning is given, advising listeners that the episode may contain potentially triggering subjects. Guest Introduction: Christine (00:01:33) Laura introduces her guest, Christine, author of "The Truth," who survived a 17-year marriage involving coercive control and gaslighting. Why Christine Started Speaking Out (00:02:58) Christine explains her journey started with silence and nonverbal therapy, then moved to journaling to validate her experiences for her children. The Power of Naming Your Pain (00:08:38) The discussion covers how naming the abuse (e.g., gaslighting, DARVO) empowers survivors and helps them begin the healing process. Planning a Safe Exit (00:09:26) Laura and Christine emphasize the importance of leaving an abusive relationship quietly and strategically, highlighting the increased danger during separation. Christine's Story: The Beginning (00:10:42) Christine shares how she met her ex-husband at 23, the quick progression of their relationship, and early red flags. The Start of Isolation (00:12:26) Christine recounts an early incident where her husband demanded she not discuss their marital problems with her parents, beginning her isolation. Reaching Out for Help (00:15:07) Christine describes a terrifying night when she reached out to her sister-in-law for help, only to be told not to involve her. Living with a Volatile Temper (00:18:16) Christine details her ex-husband's intense, unpredictable temper, which could be triggered by anything and kept her constantly on edge. Testing the Waters with Friends (00:21:01) After leaving, Christine began sharing small details with friends and family to gauge their reactions and combat her self-doubt. A Public Confrontation (00:24:24) Christine recalls a time her ex-husband publicly screamed at her in a bar for not answering her phone, which he hadn't even called. The Post-Divorce Glow Up (00:28:59) The conversation turns to the physical and emotional transformation survivors experience after leaving an abusive relationship, like having "sad eyes" disappear. Abusers Playing the Victim (00:31:17) They discuss how abusers refuse to acknowledge their behavior, often twisting the narrative to portray themselves as the victim. The Final Straw (00:36:52) Christine shares the moment she realized her situation would never change and began planning her exit to regain financial security. A Sign to Leave (00:40:02) A chance encounter with a woman who read her palm gave Christine the final push she needed to file for divorce. Why She Wrote the Book (00:46:53) Christine explains she wrote her book to validate her children's experiences and to help other survivors find the words for their pain. The Narcissist's Self-Awareness (00:50:47) Christine shares a story of her ex asking if he was a narcissist, highlighting how they manipulate and test their partners. How to Find Christine (00:55:36) Christine shares her social media handle and where to find her book, "The Truth," on Amazon.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Christine, "Because you can't see the bruise, you can't see the broken bone, I wanted to be able to give people the experience that would help them assign words and feel validated." Christine, "It was just almost a prayer at some point, like if he'd just hit me, if he'd just give me a black eye, nobody's going to question that I can leave." Christine, "From that moment, for the next 16 years, everything I lived through, I lived through by myself, and I didn't have to." Christine, "If they can control their anger everywhere except for in front of you, they can control their anger. This is not an anger management problem." Christine, "I decided because I was worried that someday my children would be trying to figure out if what they lived through was real."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/book-store JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517   FOLLOW CHRISTINE: WEBSITE/BOOK: https://a.co/d/0bqLefXb INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thetruthsheshowedme FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61584467686272 TIK TOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@thetruthsheshowedme YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@thetruthsheshowedme   "Breaking the silence is the first step toward reclaiming your truth and your life."   This podcast and its contents may not be used for training or developing AI systems without permission.   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
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  EP 97: When Family Court Fails: Hope Hooton's Fight to Protect Children 02.09.2026 1t 17min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura interviews Hope Hooton, an author, advocate, podcast host, and public speaker dedicated to protecting children and supporting survivors of domestic violence. Hope shares her devastating experience with domestic violence and coercive control and recounts how the family court system failed to protect her children, Alec and Lydia, ultimately leading to their tragic deaths at the hands of their father in May 2024. Despite unimaginable grief, Hope transformed her pain into advocacy, helping champion the Alec and Lydia Act, which was signed into law in Arizona in June 2026 to strengthen protections for children and domestic violence survivors in family court. Through her memoir, There's Still Hope: A Journey of Adversity, Tragedy, and Unshakable Faith, and her podcast Voices Against Filicide, Hope raises awareness about coercive control, filicide prevention, and the need for stronger child safety protections. She also shares her message of faith, hope, and resilience through speaking engagements across the country, using her experience to inspire others and help prevent future tragedies.   Key Topics & Timestamps Defining Filicide (00:00:00) Hope defines filicide, the intentional act of a parent killing their child, and shares statistics on this silent epidemic. Podcast Introduction (00:01:01) Host Laura introduces the "That's Where I'm At" podcast, its mission, and provides a content warning for listeners. Guest Introduction: Hope Hooten (00:01:58) Laura introduces her guest, Hope Hooten, an author and advocate, and reads her biography, highlighting her mission for change. Meeting Her Estranged Husband (00:04:27) Hope shares her background, how she met her estranged husband through a Christian organization, and the first red flags. Early Red Flags (00:08:37) Hope discusses early red flags in the relationship, including subtle manipulation, coercive control, and his explosive bursts of anger. Moving to Arizona and Marriage (00:09:50) Hope recounts moving to Arizona for a teaching job, getting married, and the subtle control her husband exerted during wedding planning. The Birth of Alec (00:18:16) Hope describes her first child, Alec, his personality, his severe allergies, and how the parenting responsibilities were primarily hers. The Birth of Lydia (00:20:59) Hope talks about the birth of her daughter, Lydia, her personality, and the close bond she shared with her brother, Alec. Escalation of Abuse (00:21:58) After Lydia's birth, the physical violence began, including being punched in the car in front of the children. Losing Both Parents (00:24:21) Hope discusses the immense grief of losing both her parents within months and the subsequent increase in financial and emotional abuse. The Decision to Separate (00:32:33) Hope explains why she decided to separate, realizing she and her children deserved better than a life filled with abuse. The Suicide Threat (00:39:04) When Hope told her husband she wanted a divorce, he threatened to kill himself in front of their children. Police Intervention and Separation (00:41:47) Hope calls 911. Police intervene, her husband is taken for evaluation, and she gets an order of protection. The Psychiatric Break (00:47:43) Her husband has a psychiatric break, tries to enter the home, and leaves disturbing voicemails, violating the protection order. The Hotel Incident (00:52:35) Her husband calls 911 on himself from a hotel, admitting to suicidal and homicidal ideations, leading to his hospitalization. The Court's Failure (00:55:16) Despite evidence of abuse and severe mental instability, a judge grants 50/50 unsupervised parenting time, failing to protect the children. The Day of the Tragedy (01:01:24) Hope recounts the day she discovered her children were absent from school and the subsequent welfare check that revealed the tragedy. Advocacy and Mission (01:03:54) Hope explains her mission to educate the public on lethality risk markers and the importance of using the term "filicide." The Alec and Lydia Act (01:06:47) Hope details the creation of the Alec and Lydia Act, a law strengthening protections for children in family court. Hope's Book and Resources (01:14:02) Hope discusses her memoir, "There's Still Hope," and shares where listeners can find her podcast and social media platforms.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Hope, "I lost my autonomy as a person. I had no sense of who Hope was or what Hope liked." Hope, "I knew that the kids deserved better. I knew that he deserved better. I knew that I deserved better." Hope, "I had a gut feeling, and I knew that if I went inside, he would have killed us all." Hope, "This is why we have two dead children, and we didn't have to have two murdered, dead children." Hope, "All of these things that failed me will not fail another family."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/book-store JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517   FOLLOW HOPE: WEBSITE: linktr.ee/hopeinthepain BOOK: There's Still Hope https://a.co/d/0ggtCrtt INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/hope_in_the_pain FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php/?id=61570891678957 TIK TOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@hope.in.the.pain YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@Hopeinthepain   "All of these things that failed me will not fail another family."   This podcast and its contents may not be used for training or developing AI systems without permission.   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
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  EP 96: Stephanie's Second Act: A Story of Strength, Faith, and Starting Over After Abuse 26.08.2026 56min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura interviews Stephanie, a publicist, event curator, storyteller, and host of Second Act Sessions. With more than 25 years of experience in brand and celebrity public relations, Stephanie has worked with recognized names including Martha Stewart, John Legend, Giada De Laurentiis, and Kevin Hart, while leading major campaigns, events, and cultural moments across New York, Boston, and Los Angeles. Stephanie also shares her deeply personal journey of surviving 13.5 years in a narcissistically abusive marriage, where emotional abuse gradually eroded her identity and led to isolation, financial dependence, and suicidal thoughts. After her marriage ended, she began rebuilding her life through healing, self-reflection, faith, and storytelling. Today, through Second Act Sessions, her writing, and her work as a speaker, Stephanie helps women navigate midlife, faith, healing, and reinvention—reminding them that an ending can become the beginning of a more honest and intentional life.   Key Topics & Timestamps Podcast Introduction (00:00:38) Host Laura introduces the podcast's mission to share women's stories of healing from narcissistic abuse and breaking the silence. Guest Introduction: Stephanie (00:01:35) Laura introduces her guest, Stephanie, a publicist, storyteller, and host of the "Second Act Sessions" podcast. Stephanie's Story Begins (00:04:12) Stephanie shares her 13.5-year marriage to a narcissist, realizing the abuse only after the divorce through social media posts. The Nature of Emotional Abuse (00:05:10) Stephanie describes emotional abuse as a slow chipping away of the self, explaining why she stayed in the relationship. Lacking Self-Esteem (00:07:08) The hosts discuss how a lack of personal self-esteem and a need for external validation made them vulnerable. Losing Her Career and Identity (00:10:07) Stephanie explains how her ex-husband isolated her by moving them away from her successful career, making her financially dependent. The Narcissist's Double Standard (00:14:03) The hosts discuss the controlling behaviors, double standards, and constant monitoring that create a suffocating environment in the relationship. Chaos, Confusion, and Isolation (00:16:51) Laura and Stephanie discuss how narcissists use chaos and confusion to make you feel crazy and isolate you from support. Reaching a Breaking Point (00:19:18) Stephanie shares how the abuse led to suicidal thoughts and feeling completely broken at the end of her marriage. A Divine Intervention (00:22:22) Stephanie describes praying to God for help, and two weeks later, her husband asked for a divorce, starting her healing. Faith and Divorce (00:24:38) Stephanie discusses reconciling her Christian faith with divorce, realizing God doesn't want anyone to stay in an abusive marriage. Reconnecting with Faith (00:30:09) Stephanie explains how she abandoned her faith during her marriage but reconnected with God, which became her saving grace. Starting to Share Her Story (00:34:15) Stephanie talks about first opening up to friends, which validated her experience and led to launching her podcast. The Healing Journey is Not Linear (00:38:17) The hosts discuss that healing takes time, has many layers, and requires giving yourself grace without a specific timeline. How to Support a Friend (00:46:38) The hosts offer advice on how to support a friend in a narcissistic relationship by listening, validating, and praying. Writing a Memoir (00:51:41) Stephanie shares her journey of writing a book about her life, from being bullied to navigating midlife after divorce.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Stephanie, "Emotional abuse is so different because there are no bruises; you can't see it. What I found in my relationship was that it was a slow, gradual chipping away of myself." Stephanie, "I knew how to love someone else, but the problem I experienced was I didn't know how to love myself." Stephanie, "You start shrinking yourself in the marriage and almost don't realize it's happening until you get out of it and get some space to realize you are a shell of your former self." Stephanie, "Slowly, with every twist and turn, I'm getting more. I'm reclaiming myself and coming back to who I'm meant to be, who God wants me to be." Stephanie, "Be very patient with yourself. There is no timetable. You could be fine and happy one minute and crying the next, and that's okay. That is healing."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/book-store JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517   FOLLOW STEPHANIE: WEBSITE: https://secondactsessions.com/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/stephaniefcarmody FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/stephanie.figuracarmody X: https://x.com/secondactsesh?s=21&t=HFLPApyOcqY76oUCL7E4nQ YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@stephaniefcarmody   "Be very patient with yourself. There is no timetable. That is healing."   This podcast and its contents may not be used for training or developing AI systems without permission.   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
• 
  EP 95: Breaking the Anxiety Loop: Reclaim Your Joy and Rewrite Your Story with Ginger Kramer 19.08.2026 49min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura interviews Ginger Kramer, a therapist, author, educator, and speaker passionate about helping women understand the emotional patterns that keep them stuck and find the confidence to move forward. Ginger shares insights from her 20+ years in therapy and her book Break the Anxiety Loop, exploring practical tools for managing anxiety, rebuilding self-trust after abuse, and navigating the emotional challenges of midlife transitions. Ginger emphasizes the power of taking baby steps, celebrating small wins, and using positive affirmations backed by personal evidence to rebuild confidence. She also discusses shadow work and the importance of making small daily decisions that help women reconnect with their true selves, reclaim their identity, and create healthier, more fulfilling lives after toxic relationships.   Key Topics & Timestamps Podcast Introduction (00:00:38) Host Laura introduces the podcast's mission to help women heal by sharing stories and breaking the silence around their struggles. Content Warning (00:01:26) A brief warning is given that the episode may contain subjects that could be triggering for some listeners. Guest Introduction: Ginger Kramer (00:01:35) Host Laura introduces guest Ginger Kramer, a therapist and author specializing in emotional wellness, anxiety, and personal growth. Ginger's Background and Journey (00:03:34) Ginger discusses her 23-year therapy career, how selling skincare built her confidence, and her personal experience with anxiety. Breaking the Anxiety Loop (00:05:36) Ginger explains her hands-on therapy approach and the inspiration behind her book, which provides tools to manage the nervous system. The Power of Positive Self-Talk (00:11:06) Ginger shares a simple tool: using three positive phrases as a form of self-cheerleading to build confidence and move forward. Finding Proof for Affirmations (00:12:53) The importance of looking for real-life proof to validate affirmations is discussed, making them more effective than just repeating words. Keeping Healing Simple (00:15:20) Ginger advises against overwhelming oneself with big journals, suggesting instead to use scrap paper to track small, daily wins. Taking "Baby Steps" (00:16:49) Using the movie "What About Bob?" as an example, Ginger emphasizes the power of taking small, manageable steps during healing. Rebuilding Self-Trust in Midlife (00:18:28) The conversation shifts to the challenges women in midlife face, like empty nest syndrome, and how to rediscover themselves. Finding Your Path (00:21:34) Ginger explains that life has different chapters and encourages finding purpose and satisfaction in new passions, no matter how small. Revisiting Your Past Self (00:22:23) Instead of wanting to be who you were, identify the feelings from your past you want to reclaim now. Connecting Your Life's Thread (00:25:25) Ginger gives Laura homework to find the connecting thread between her past career and her current work with the podcast. A Therapist's Role (00:28:54) Ginger describes her role as helping clients see different perspectives and understand they can be whoever they want to be now. Trying New Things and Failing (00:31:12) The importance of trying new activities, building new neural pathways, and accepting failure as a necessary part of learning. Ginger's Workbooks and Action Guides (00:35:34) Ginger provides an overview of her published resources, including a 30-day skills book, a coloring book, and journals. Understanding Shadow Work (00:37:31) Shadow work is explained as a way to explore hidden or forgotten parts of yourself to become more well-rounded. Making Your Own Decisions (00:39:17) The speakers discuss the freedom and challenge of making personal choices after leaving a controlling relationship, starting with small things. Free Email Series (00:46:19) Ginger introduces her free 30-day email series, which offers daily guidance on managing anxiety and making personal changes. Conclusion and Final Thoughts (00:47:27) Ginger and Laura wrap up the conversation, encouraging listeners to share their stories and find their purpose in healing.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Ginger, "I get a lot of people going, "But I'm not really bad enough." It doesn't matter. If you hurt, then it's bad enough." Ginger, "You're not that person you were before; you can be whoever you want to be now." Ginger, "There's no decision that you make that you can't change." Laura, "My son asked me when I first got divorced, "Hey, do you want red or green enchiladas?" I was like, "I have no idea. I've never chosen."" Ginger, "It's scary, but you learn how to trust yourself by failing."   RESOURCES: JOIN US AT THE TEA: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/1994887313656?aff=oddtdtcreator FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/book-store JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517   FOLLOW GINGER: WEBSITE: https://gingerkramer.com/ FREEBIE: https://gingerkramer.com/free-guide INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thecalmspacewithginger/ FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/ginger.c.kramer YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@thecalmspacewithginger   "Small steps, self-trust, and new choices can help you break the anxiety loop and rediscover who you are."   AI Content Use Notice: This podcast and its contents may not be used for training or developing AI systems without permission.   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
• 
  EP 94: From Self-Abandonment to Self-Leadership: A Raw and Real Conversation About Healing with Amy Watkins 12.08.2026 1t

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura interviews Amy Watkins, a therapist turned truth teller, speaker, and author of Performing Normal: A Woman's Story from Self-Abandonment to Self-Leadership. Amy shares her powerful journey of growing up under religious conditioning and neglect, surviving sexual abuse, and enduring two abusive marriages shaped by trauma bonding and gaslighting. She reflects on how these experiences influenced her identity and kept her disconnected from her own needs and voice. Amy opens up about her spiritual awakening and the difficult process of choosing herself after years of self-abandonment. She shares how small acts of self-care became part of her healing and encourages others to recognize subtle patterns of abuse, break toxic cycles, and reclaim their lives. Through her story and work, Amy reminds listeners that healing is not about becoming someone new—it's about discovering yourself, finding your voice, and learning to lead your own life.   Key Topics & Timestamps Podcast Introduction (00:00:35) Host Laura introduces the podcast's mission: for women to share their stories and heal together from abuse and secrets. Guest Introduction: Amy Watkins (00:01:33) Amy Watkins, a therapist and author, is introduced. Her book focuses on healing from childhood trauma and self-abandonment. Why Amy Started Speaking Out (00:02:54) Amy shares that after being silenced for years, she started speaking out following a spiritual awakening and leaving her marriage. Recognizing a "Nice" Abuser (00:04:34) Amy discusses her abusive marriage, where her husband was so "nice" and smothering that she couldn't recognize the abuse. The Pettiness That Sparked Healing (00:07:01) Both Amy and Laura admit they initially started sharing their stories out of pettiness, which surprisingly resonated with many people. Dealing with Negative Feedback (00:07:52) Amy talks about receiving negative comments and blame from others after she started sharing her story online and healing from it. Religious Conditioning and Red Flags (00:09:15) Amy discusses her strict religious upbringing, which taught her to be a "good girl" and led to marrying quickly. The Illusion of a "Right Life" (00:11:41) The speakers discuss how high-control religion teaches that doing the "right things" will earn heavenly rewards, justifying current suffering. The Slow Decline in a Relationship (00:15:00) Amy explains how abusers "manage down expectations" over time, making victims grateful for small gestures, like a single text message. The Reverse Hoover and Trauma Bonds (00:16:23) Amy describes the "reverse hoover," where her ex would vanish, activating her abandonment wounds and keeping her in a trauma bond. The "I'm Trying" Tactic (00:19:28) Amy explains how abusers use generic phrases like "I'm trying" without any real effort or understanding of what needs to change. The Dangers of Non-Trauma-Informed Therapy (00:21:22) Amy shares a negative experience with a therapist who wasn't trauma-informed, highlighting the importance of finding the right professional help. Weaponizing Vulnerability (00:24:25) The host discusses how abusers weaponize shared vulnerabilities and past traumas, using them to deflect and maintain control in arguments. The Brain's Healing Process (00:26:27) They discuss how, during healing, the brain starts recalling suppressed memories and lies, bringing clarity to past abusive situations. Pathological Hope (00:28:00) Amy explains "pathological hope," where victims cling to the belief that their abuser will change, a pattern often learned in childhood. From Self-Abandonment to Self-Leadership (00:30:52) The conversation shifts to the concept of self-abandonment, which is at the core of staying in toxic relationships. How to Stop Abandoning Yourself (00:35:15) Amy offers a simple, practical tip to start noticing self-abandonment: consciously deciding to go pee when you need to. Making the Unconscious Conscious (00:38:29) Amy quotes Carl Jung, explaining that until we understand our unconscious childhood patterns, they will run our lives and be mistaken for fate. The Healing Journey is Not Quick (00:42:21) Amy emphasizes that healing from deep-seated trauma is a long, ongoing process with no definitive end, but it does get better. Losing People During Healing (00:44:28) They discuss the painful but necessary process of losing friends and family who cannot accept the new, healed version of you. Why Healing Can Feel Worse Than Trauma (00:49:49) Amy explains that healing is painful because you are consciously feeling the grief your brain previously dissociated from to protect you. Writing the Book (00:52:13) Amy shares her experience of writing her book, which involved an intense period of memories and emotions pouring out. The Decision to Leave (00:54:43) Amy recounts how she left her first marriage by having an affair, an unconscious act to escape a suffocating situation. Finding Amy Online (00:58:40) The host asks Amy where listeners can find her online, and she shares her Instagram handle and book title.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Amy, "When you are raised in chaos and abuse, red flags don't look red. They just look like your average Tuesday." Amy, "It was for me to learn how to come back to myself and say, "I can't be here anymore. I don't know how to be mistreated anymore."" Amy, "Healing was harder than the trauma." Amy, "This is me becoming my authentic self, because for 47 years, I had no idea who I was." Amy, "I was abandoning myself. I was talking to my clients about it, and I didn't even fully understand what that meant."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/book-store JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517 FOLLOW AMY: WEBSITE: Amywatkinsstudio.com INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/gods.favorite.problem/ BOOK LINK: https://www.amywatkinsstudio.com/book   "When you stop abandoning yourself, you begin to reclaim your voice, your identity, and your life."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
• 
  EP 93: When Faith Becomes a Cage: Jubilee's Journey Out of Cult Control and Domestic Violence 05.08.2026 1t

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura interviews Jubilee, a content creator and host of the podcasts Healed-ish and The Overshare Hour, where she openly discusses religious trauma, purity culture, deconstruction, and healing from abuse. Jubilee shares her powerful story of joining Bethel, a high-control religious organization, and marrying an abusive man after a public prophecy declared they were destined to be together. She recounts the manipulation, isolation, and physical abuse she endured before finally leaving the marriage and filing for divorce over what became known as the "Disney burger" incident. Today, Jubilee uses her voice and platform to help others navigate religious trauma, reclaim their identity, and find freedom through honest conversations about healing and deconstruction.   Key Topics & Timestamps Podcast Introduction (00:00:36) The host, Laura, introduces the podcast's mission to share women's stories of healing from trauma and abuse. Guest Introduction (00:01:34 Laura introduces her guest, Jubilee, a content creator who shares her story of leaving a cult and an abusive marriage. The Isolation of Deconstruction (00:03:13) Jubilee discusses the loneliness and loss of community that comes with questioning and leaving high-control religious systems. Why Jubilee Started Sharing Her Story (00:05:55) Jubilee explains how she began sharing her story online to raise awareness about the cult, Bethel, and her experiences. Joining the Cult, Bethel (00:07:11) Jubilee recounts being drawn to Bethel after a powerful experience at a conference where she believed she was healed. The Bethel Experience (00:12:33) Jubilee describes the pressure to conform to specific behaviors, like manifesting, to fit into the Bethel culture. Interning at a Smaller Ministry (00:15:04) Jubilee moves to a smaller, more eccentric ministry in Pennsylvania for an internship, where she meets her future husband. Meeting Her Abusive Ex-Husband (00:18:02) Jubilee describes how her ex-husband appeared kind and generous, love-bombing her and grooming her for a relationship. The Marriage Prophecy (00:21:35) A well-known prophet publicly declares that God intends for Jubilee and her then-boyfriend to marry, solidifying her decision. Ignoring Red Flags (00:28:05) Jubilee shares the bizarre and delusional beliefs her ex-husband held, which she overlooked due to the prophecy. The Harm of False Prophecies (00:34:16) The host and Jubilee discuss how prophetic words can trap people in abusive situations by making them feel divinely sanctioned. The Disney Burger Incident (00:36:36) Jubilee details the fight that started when she gave her cousin a bite of her burger at Disney World. The Final Assault (00:46:47) The argument over the burger escalates, leading to her husband strangling her for the second time in their marriage. Calling the Domestic Violence Hotline (00:48:41) After the assault, Jubilee calls a hotline, which helps her recognize the pattern of abuse in her marriage. Leaving and Filing for Divorce (00:53:49) Jubilee strategically leaves her husband, returns home, and files for divorce, which is finalized quickly due to the pandemic. Jubilee's Current Projects (00:57:12) Jubilee talks about her two podcasts, "Heal Dish" and "The Overshare Hour," and her plans to write a memoir.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Jubilee, "I called the domestic violence hotline because I really didn't feel like I could talk to anybody in my life about it." Jubilee, "I was so primed to believe that that is how love works. It's what I wanted for myself. I wanted to feel chosen and seen." Jubilee, "I would not have married him if it was not for this prophetic word." Jubilee, "So often in this marriage, I had apologized. I had gotten so used to, 'I know how to fix this. I know how to make it go away,' and the way to make it go away is to say that everything was my fault." Jubilee, "She said, 'I believe that God says that you're allowed to get divorced.' And that was exactly what I needed to hear."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/book-store JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517 FOLLOW JUBILEE: INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/jubileedawns/ TIK TOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@jubileedawns YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@jubileedawns   "Freedom begins the moment you trust your voice over fear."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
• 
  EP 92: Holy Disobedience: Sex, Sin, and Secrets, and Healing From Abuse with Melissa Duge Spiers 29.07.2026 55min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura speaks with Melissa Duge Spiers, an award-winning essayist, screenwriter, and advocate for survivors of religious and narcissistic abuse. Through her writing, memoir Holy Disobedience: Sex, Sin, and Secrets in the Biggest Church No One Knows, and her online platforms, The Glory Whole, Melissa shares her personal journey of healing while helping others recognize and recover from religious trauma. Her work has been featured in The Huffington Post, and she is also a contributor to Take the Fruit: An Anthology of Religious Trauma. Melissa opens up about growing up in the cult-like Seventh-day Adventist Church, where teachings centered on submission and self-abandonment left her vulnerable to abusive relationships. She reflects on how religious programming shaped her decade-long narcissistic marriage and a subsequent toxic relationship before discussing the healing she found through therapy, supportive online communities, and writing her memoir. Together, Laura and Melissa emphasize that leaving abuse is only the beginning, and that lasting healing comes through ongoing self-discovery, reclaiming your voice, and learning to trust yourself again.   Key Topics & Timestamps Guest Introduction (00:01:28) Laura introduces the guest, Melissa, an award-winning writer and advocate for survivors of religious and narcissistic abuse. The Biggest Church No One Knows (00:02:53) Melissa discusses the Seventh-day Adventist Church, a fundamentalist Christian organization she describes as cult-like and surprisingly large. Leaving the Church vs. Healing (00:05:36) Melissa explains that leaving the church at 18 was not the same as healing from its programming. Repeating Religious Patterns (00:07:01) Melissa describes how the church's teachings on submission and obedience led her into abusive relationships in her secular life. Suppressing Emotions (00:09:57) Melissa and Laura discuss how their high-control religious upbringings taught them to suppress "bad" feelings like anger. The "Fake" Persona (00:13:35) Melissa recalls being called "fake" because she was out of touch with her feelings, a result of childhood self-abandonment. Learning About Boundaries (00:15:56) The conversation covers the difficulty of learning and practicing boundaries after decades of people-pleasing and being called "difficult." Documenting Survivor Stories (00:17:20) Melissa explains how she began documenting survivor stories of abuse within the church, which eventually aided a lawsuit. The Healing Power of Sharing (00:19:05) Melissa and Laura discuss the validating and healing experience of holding space for other survivors and sharing their stories. Discovering Her Father's Abuse (00:22:23) Melissa shares the story of learning her pastor father was an abuser and how she connected with one of his victims. A Dangerous Partnership (00:25:49) Melissa recounts her decade-long, controlling marriage to a man with Cluster B personality disorders, which felt familiar after her upbringing. Discovering Narcissistic Abuse (00:28:18) Melissa explains how she learned about narcissistic abuse online during Covid, finally putting a name to her partner's behavior. Coercive Control Tactics (00:34:10) The discussion turns to specific manipulative tactics like feigning panic attacks and using sleep deprivation to maintain control. The Sleep Talking Manipulation (00:36:10) Melissa describes how her ex-partner would say cruel things in his sleep and then deny responsibility when confronted. Deprogramming and Escaping (00:43:09) Melissa details how therapy and online communities helped her deconstruct her trauma and finally leave her abusive partner. Life After Abuse (00:48:16) Melissa and Laura talk about the glorious process of getting to know themselves and finding freedom after leaving abusive relationships. About the Book: "Holy Disobedience" (00:50:31) Melissa describes her memoir, which covers leaving her religion, realizing its programming led to abuse, and her healing journey. Leaving Doesn't Equal Healing (00:53:28) Melissa emphasizes that leaving an abusive situation is just the first step; conscious, ongoing work is required for true healing.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Melissa, "I had left at 18. As soon as I was an adult, I was out of there, and I just thought naively that leaving equaled healing." Melissa, "High-control religions teach you to not trust your gut. Your doubts are from the devil." Melissa, "It is just a jaw-dropping, stomach-dropping moment when you realize, 'Oh my God, there's a name for this.'" Melissa, "My therapist was like, 'This is your chance. You have been given a gift by being kicked out. Do not take him with you.' And I was just like, 'Oh, I can do that.'" Melissa, "Leaving does not equal healing. That's leaving a religion, a relationship, or a toxic family. It doesn't matter."   RESOURCES: COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura YOU'RE NOT CRAZY ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517 FOLLOW MELISSA: SUBSTACK: https://substack.com/@melissadugespiers BOOK: https://www.lakedrivebooks.com/books/holy-disobedience/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/the.glory.whole/ TIK TOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@theglorywhole YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@theglorywhole3831   "Leaving is the first step. Healing begins when you learn to trust yourself again."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
• 
  EP 91: What Does True Healing from Betrayal Really Look Like? with Dr. Debi Silber 22.07.2026 56min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura speaks with Dr. Debi Silber, the world's leading expert on betrayal recovery, founder and CEO of the Post Betrayal Transformation (PBT) Institute, and a PhD researcher whose work has transformed how we understand the impact of broken trust. Drawing on research involving more than 100,000 people across 50+ countries, Dr. Debi has identified groundbreaking discoveries about betrayal recovery that have helped individuals, coaches, leaders, and organizations move from pain to transformation. A two-time TEDx speaker, bestselling author, award-winning speaker, and host of the From Betrayal to Breakthrough podcast, she has dedicated her career to helping people rebuild their lives after betrayal. Together, Laura and Dr. Debi explore the profound emotional, physical, and psychological effects of betrayal, discussing how broken trust can shatter identity, relationships, and overall well-being. Dr. Debi shares her own deeply personal journey, which inspired her PhD research and the creation of the PBT Institute, and explains the five stages of betrayal recovery. Throughout the conversation, she offers practical insights, hope, and encouragement, reminding listeners that while betrayal can change you, healing is possible through willingness, intentional rebuilding, and transformation.   Key Topics & Timestamps Podcast Introduction (00:00:34) Host Laura introduces the podcast, its purpose for women healing from narcissistic relationships, and the importance of sharing stories. Introducing Doctor Debi Silber (00:01:23) Laura introduces guest Doctor Debi Silber, detailing her extensive credentials and expertise in betrayal recovery and post-betrayal transformation. How Doctor Debi Started Her Work (00:03:46) Doctor Debi shares her personal story of betrayal by family and her husband, which led her to pursue a PhD. The Decision to Share Her Story (00:06:22) Doctor Debi discusses the terror and vulnerability of sharing her personal betrayal story publicly, starting with her TEDx talks. Defining Betrayal (00:09:44) Betrayal is defined as breaking a spoken or unspoken rule and is unique from other traumas because it requires rebuilding yourself. Why We Don't See Betrayal Coming (00:14:30) Doctor Debi explains that betrayal is deceptive by design and discusses how people intentionally or unintentionally turn down their intuition. Resilience vs. Transformation (00:18:54) Using a house analogy, Doctor Debi explains the difference between resilience (restoring) and transformation (rebuilding something entirely new) after trauma. Rebuilding Yourself with Intention (00:21:18) The opportunity after betrayal is to intentionally rebuild a new version of yourself, even changing small, self-critical habits. The Window of Willingness (00:22:58) A four-level framework to determine if it's possible to rebuild a relationship with the person who betrayed you. Rebuilding Trust in Yourself (00:28:46) Betrayal shatters our ability to trust our own judgment, so rebuilding self-trust is a crucial part of the healing process.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Dr Debi, "I have no idea if I can heal from this, but if I can, I'm taking everybody with me."Laura, "I'm speaking for that woman who was me, who was dying. If she didn't hear that there was hope on the other side, she was going to die because I literally wanted to die."Dr Debi "You don't even want to get back to who you were, because that version of you may have been tolerating what you no longer are willing to tolerate."Dr Debi, "I was so critical. I would never say to anybody else what I would say to myself."Dr Debi, "Even though it happened to you, it's not about you. Stop blaming and shaming yourself."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/book-store JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517 FOLLOW DR DEBI: WEBSITE: https://thepbtinstitute.com INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/debisilber/ YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/debisilber   "Betrayal may break your trust, but it doesn't have to define your future."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
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  EP 90: Healing Trauma and OCD with Bravery: Lucia Severtson on the Brave Women's Community Center 15.07.2026 48min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura speaks with licensed psychotherapist, creative arts therapist, and Brave Hearts Speak podcast host Lucia Severtson, founder of The Brave Women's Community Center, a trauma-informed, arts-based nonprofit dedicated to helping women and girls heal from abuse, reconnect with their inner voice, and reclaim their power. Drawing on her background in psychotherapy, theatre, dance/movement therapy, and the creative arts, Lucia shares her deeply personal journey through OCD, a traumatic health scare linked to birth control, and the lasting impact of narcissistic abuse. She opens up about how severe insomnia and suicidal thoughts led her to seek specialized OCD therapy, ultimately transforming her life. Inspired by her own healing journey, Lucia created The Brave Women's Community Center to provide therapeutic improv, storytelling circles, empowerment workshops, and other trauma-informed programs that help women move beyond survival and rediscover joy, creativity, and purpose. Throughout the conversation, she and Laura explore the power of community, creative expression, and self-compassion in the healing process, reminding listeners that bravery isn't about being fearless—it's about showing up, reclaiming your voice, and embracing a life filled with hope and authenticity.   Key Topics & Timestamps Guest Introduction (00:01:30) Laura introduces Lucia Sivertsen, a psychotherapist and founder of the Brave Women's Community Center, specializing in arts-based therapy. Lucia's Journey into Therapy (00:02:35) Lucia explains her work is rooted in her personal history, including her family of origin and a 2019 OCD episode. Health Scare and OCD Onset (00:03:12) Lucia details a severe health scare from birth control, leading to weight loss, insomnia, and an intense OCD episode. Suicidal Thoughts and Seeking Help (00:05:41) Lucia describes how severe sleep deprivation led to suicidal thoughts and the realization that her mind, not her body, was sick. Finding the Right Therapist (00:07:25) Lucia shares the relief of finding a therapist specializing in OCD and the sadness of accepting her brain disorder diagnosis. Women's Healthcare and Medical Abuse (00:08:56) The conversation shifts to the poor treatment of women in healthcare, particularly regarding perimenopause, framing it as a form of abuse. A Painful Doctor's Visit (00:14:21) Lucia recounts a shaming, invalidating experience with a nurse practitioner who dismissed her suffering and called her crazy. Healing Through Exposure Therapy (00:16:55) Lucia explains how Exposure and Response Prevention therapy saved her life and taught her the true meaning of being brave. Narcissistic Abuse and Self-Worth (00:18:18) Lucia realized her family history of narcissistic abuse caused deep-seated negative beliefs about herself, feeling like she was "nothing." Creating the Brave Women's Community Center (00:22:48) Lucia was inspired to create a safe, non-competitive space for women to heal and find their own embodiment of bravery. The Power of Creative Arts in Healing (00:25:10) Laura and Lucia discuss how trying new creative activities helps rebuild neural pathways and heal the brain after trauma. Building a Safe Community (00:30:06 Lucia describes creating a safe, non-judgmental environment where women can overcome fear and reclaim their creativity without pressure to perform. Storytelling Circles and Therapeutic Improv (00:35:12) Lucia explains her podcast's origin and her therapeutic improv workshops, which use play and writing to facilitate storytelling and healing. The Courage to Heal (00:39:13) The discussion covers how abuse erodes courage and how small, brave acts, like decorating a home, are vital steps forward. Finding Lucia and Her Work (00:43:56) Lucia shares where listeners can find her online, including her website, social media channels, and upcoming creative writing courses. A Year-Long Theater Program for Survivors (00:45:32) Lucia announces a grant-funded, year-long theater program in Denver for women survivors to create and perform their own show.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Lucia, "I think something clicked for me where I started to realize, 'I don't think my body is sick. I think my mind is sick.'" Lucia, "What I was looking for all my life that I didn't realize I wanted was to be brave." Lucia, "I don't have to make my drive in life being safe." Lucia, "I just wanted to be a fuller human being, and I wanted to help other women do that because I knew I wasn't the only one." Lucia, "I wanted to find them, and I wanted to be able to provide them with an actual way to embody bravery."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/book-store JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517   FOLLOW LUCIA: WEBSITE: www.bravewomenscommunity.com INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/bravewomenscommunity/ FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/bravewomenscommunity LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lucia-divieste-severtson-5055351b6/ LISTEN TO BRAVE HEARTS SPEAK PODCAST: https://open.spotify.com/show/27zFc8gBQICTTK33wn3NUh?si=e626fbc4fa86438a   "True bravery isn't fearlessness; it's showing up for yourself, one step at a time."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
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  EP 89: Two Women, One Narcissist: Deana & Lizzie's Harrowing Journey Through Abuse, Lies, and Healing 08.07.2026 1t 5min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura sits down with Deana, Lizzie, and Jane—three women whose story sounds like a Lifetime movie, but every word of it is true. Deana and Lizzie were both married to the same narcissistic man, "Rex," who led a double life while leaving a trail of emotional, financial, and sexual abuse behind him. After discovering the truth and connecting with one another, they tracked down his secret girlfriend to warn her, choosing solidarity over silence. Together, they share how Rex's charm masked years of manipulation, discuss the red flags they wish they had recognized sooner, and explain how they broke free from self-blame to transform their pain into purpose. The conversation concludes with practical advice for anyone questioning whether they're experiencing narcissistic abuse, along with an introduction to their podcast, Surviving Toxic Relationships with the Matadors, where they continue helping others recognize abuse and find hope through shared experiences. Laura's co-host for this episode is Jane. Jane is the ex fiancé of my ex husband. They spent two years together, and we all hung out together in college. She's here to give her perspective of being with the same narcissist I was, and also her experience with narcissistic abuse in other relationships in her life.   Key Topics & Timestamps The Likelihood of a Second Toxic Relationship (00:00:00) Women who have been with a narcissist are more likely to end up with another one, who may appear different. Podcast Introduction (00:00:33) Host Laura introduces the "That's Where I'm At" podcast, a space for women to share their stories and heal. Trigger Warning (00:01:22) A brief announcement warns listeners that the episode's content may be triggering and advises them to take care. Introducing the Guests and Their Story (00:01:30) Laura introduces guests Deana and Lizzie, who were married to the same narcissist, and co-host Jane, an ex-fiancée. Deana's Story: Meeting "Rex" (00:03:00) Deana shares how she met her ex-husband, "Rex," at 17 and married him quickly despite early red flags. Deana's 27-Year Marriage (00:04:24) Deana describes her 27-year marriage, marked by her ex's sexual addiction, financial abuse, gaslighting, and manipulation. Ignoring Red Flags (00:06:37) The group discusses seeing red flags early on but being too naive or in survival mode to act on them. The Trauma Bond (00:10:08) Laura explains how intermittent reinforcement and abuse create a trauma bond, making it difficult for victims to leave. Lizzie's Story: How She Was Wooed (00:11:21) Lizzie explains how Rex charmed her by helping with her four sons, a different approach than he used with Deana. Lizzie's Marriage and the Turning Point (00:14:28) Lizzie describes her six-year marriage and how things got weird after a great summer, leading to her leaving him. Financial Abuse and Reaching Out (00:15:21) Lizzie discovered her credit was ruined and reached out to Deana's son to let him know she was leaving. Should You Warn the Next Person? (00:17:55) The women debate the difficult decision of whether to warn a narcissist's new partner, who may see them as crazy. Jane's Perspective (00:20:21) Jane, the ex-fiancée of Laura's ex-husband, shares her experience and the red flags she now recognizes from their relationship. The Narcissist's Need for Attention (00:22:37)  The group discusses the narcissist's constant need for female attention, possibly stemming from a "mother wound" or self-centeredness. Connecting Deana and Lizzie (00:25:08) Deana recounts how her son encouraged her to contact Lizzie, leading to a conversation that connected the dots for both. The Healing Power of Validation (00:27:01) Laura and Jane discuss the profound healing that came from speaking with someone who experienced the exact same narcissist. Discovering Wife Number Three (00:29:50) Deana and Lizzie found out Rex was dating another woman while married to Lizzie and felt compelled to find her. Finding and Warning "Jane Doe" (00:31:20) Deana describes the months-long search for the other woman and the phone call where she revealed Rex's double life. The Aftermath for Wife Number Three (00:35:12) The third wife, Jane, connected with Lizzie, realized the extent of the deception, and had Rex served with annulment papers. What Attracted Them to the Narcissist (00:38:43) The women reflect on their own vulnerabilities, like low self-esteem and a need for love, that made them susceptible. Healing Journeys: Gratitude and Journaling (00:49:07) Lizzie shares how journaling and focusing on daily blessings helped her heal and change her mindset during her grief. Healing Within the Relationship (00:51:06) Deana explains her healing began before the divorce by focusing on her own growth instead of trying to fix him. Changing the Narrative (00:54:28) Jane discusses how she had to change the internal narrative that everything was her fault to begin her healing process. Why They Started a Podcast (00:55:58) Deana and Lizzie decided to share their story publicly to help other women after discovering Rex's extensive deception. How Narcissists Keep Track of Lies (00:57:20) The group discusses how narcissists manage multiple relationships, often by using generic pet names like "sweetie" for everyone. The Importance of Taking Your Time (00:58:32) Deana notes that her children learned to be discerning in their own relationships after witnessing their father's deceptive behavior. A Word of Caution for Survivors (01:02:35) Deana advises survivors that trauma can skew their perception, causing them to see red flags even in healthy relationships. Where to Find the Guests (01:03:49) Deana shares where listeners can find their podcast and social media channels, "Surviving Toxic Relationships with The Matadors."   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Lizzie: "It's hard to keep turning your head on someone that is speaking a language in a season of your life that speaks to you in all the right places." Deana: "Once it happens to someone else who you know is a wonderful person, you're like, 'Okay, it's not just me. I was right.'" Deana: "I finally got the epiphany that I could not change him to make myself okay, because that's what I was working on." Jane: "The main thing was I had to change the narrative that I would always run through my head because I would always make it my fault." Jane: "Knowing I am not the crazy one, it's not just me overreacting. This is actually happening."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517   FOLLOW Deana & Lizzie:  Website: survivingtoxicrelationships.org Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/survivingtoxicrelationships/# Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61556560386678 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@survivingtoxicrelationships12 Surviving Toxic Relationships Podcast with The Matadoras: https://open.spotify.com/show/66AjWdW7dMB7qBHcqje8GW   "Healing begins when the truth replaces the lies and survivors choose each other over silence."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
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  EP 88: Recognizing and Escaping a Narcissistic Abuser in a Christian Marriage with Liberty Steele 01.07.2026 58min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura welcomes Liberty Steele, author of Redeemed Years: From Narcissistic Darkness to Light. Believing she was entering a Christ-centered marriage, Liberty instead spent six years trapped in a relationship marked by narcissistic abuse, emotional manipulation, subtle physical abuse, and isolation. She shares how love bombing, inadequate support from church counselors, and the misuse of religious teachings kept her trapped, while her abuse was repeatedly dismissed as postpartum depression. After finding freedom, healing, and experiencing the joy of a healthy marriage, Liberty now shares her story through her book and her platform, Shine From Your Shadows, to help others recognize abuse, know they are not alone, and find hope for a brighter future.   Key Topics & Timestamps Guest Introduction: Liberty Steele (00:01:29) Laura welcomes Liberty Steele, who shares her story of surviving a narcissistic marriage and finding freedom, healing, and hope. The Isolation of Abuse in a Church Community (00:02:23) Liberty explains why she shares her story, highlighting the isolating experience of abuse within a church community. Inadequate Church Counseling (00:04:23) Liberty describes receiving unhelpful advice from church counselors who prioritized reconciliation over her safety, even when she was locked out. Subtle Physical Abuse (00:05:27) Liberty details the subtle physical abuse she endured, like random biting and spanking, which intentionally crossed her established boundaries. Misinterpreting Scripture on Divorce (00:06:23) The discussion covers how scripture, particularly "God hates divorce," is often misconstrued to keep women in abusive relationships. The Dangers of Uninformed Counselors (00:09:08) Laura shares a story about a pastor whose uninformed counseling led to a woman being murdered by her abusive husband. Meeting on a Christian Dating Site (00:12:00) Liberty recounts meeting her ex-husband on Christian Mingle, where he mirrored her desires and engaged in love bombing. Early Red Flags and Ignoring Intuition (00:15:14) Liberty describes feeling uncomfortable with the rushed physical intimacy on their first meeting but dismissing her gut feelings. Moving and Mom's Premonition (00:20:05) Liberty moved across the country for him within five months, despite her mother's strong sense that something was wrong. Extended Premarital Counseling (00:22:06) Counseling lasted nearly a year due to significant issues, including his escalating temper, which was wrongly attributed to PTSD. The Bait and Switch Proposal (00:25:01) He proposed, then used the counselors' advice to "check in" with his ex-wife as an opportunity to cheat. The Honeymoon Incident (00:29:25) The honeymoon began with him raging at her on the plane, leaving her sobbing in the hotel bathtub. The Cycle of Abuse Begins (00:34:00) Liberty describes how the cycle of abuse, forgiveness, and forgetting started on the honeymoon, setting the marriage's tone. The First Year of Marriage (00:36:04) The first year was filled with emotional abuse, including withholding affection and giving the silent treatment for weeks. A Story of Betrayal and Isolation (00:38:06) Liberty shares a story of being harassed by a neighbor while her husband refused to defend her, blaming her instead. Compromising to Reconcile (00:42:23) Liberty recounts being forced into a degrading sexual act to end the silent treatment, with little support from counselors. The Problem with Couples Counseling in Abuse (00:44:18) The host explains why couples counseling is dangerous in abusive relationships, as abusers manipulate therapists and continue the abuse. The Impact of Having a Baby (00:50:05) The abuse escalated after their baby was born, disguised as postpartum depression, and included severe sleep deprivation. Writing "Redeem Years" and Finding Hope (00:53:59) Liberty discusses writing her book, which offers a practical toolkit and a story of hope after finding a healthy marriage.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Liberty, "It was such an isolating experience for me. You don't feel quite safe sharing it in your church community, and you're not sure who is going to accept you or support you." Liberty, "I wasn't listening to my gut, my Holy Spirit discretion." Liberty, "I was asking God what was going on. How could this person who just promised to love me my whole life treat me like he hated me?" Liberty, "It even sounds crazy when you try to think of how to describe this kind of torture to other people. You don't know how to describe it in a way that they would think it was actually believable." Liberty, "The grief has taught me how much of a gift real love and real partnership is, and that people shouldn't give up on hoping for it."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517 RESOURCES: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/resources   FOLLOW LIBERTY:  WEBSITE: Shinefromyourshadows.com INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/shine_from_yourshadows BOOK: https://a.co/d/0fNcZnPX   "Real faith never asks you to sacrifice your safety for someone else's control."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
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  EP 87: Dr. Christine Marie Cocchiola on Coercive Control and How Protective Parents Can Heal the Damage 24.06.2026 49min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura speaks with Dr. Christine Marie Cocchiola, a therapeutic parenting and divorce custody coach, social justice advocate, and survivor of coercive control. Drawing from both her professional expertise and lived experience, Dr. Christine developed The Protective Parenting Program, an evidence-based, attachment-focused model that helps parents support children harmed by abusive partners. She is an internationally recognized educator on coercive control, presenting to professionals, advocates, and protective parents on the dynamics of abuse and effective intervention strategies. She is also the author of Every Moment of Every Day, co-author of FRAMED: Women in the Family Court Underworld, and her TEDx talk, It Is ALL Coercive Control, has been viewed more than 1.4 million times. During the conversation, Dr. Christine shares her personal journey through nearly 30 years of psychological abuse and explains how coercive control extends beyond intimate relationships to manipulate children, families, and even court systems. She discusses tactics such as triangulation, reactive abuse, and the challenges protective parents face while navigating custody disputes. Together, Laura and Dr. Christine explore the critical role of the protective parent, emphasizing that unconditional love, secure attachment, and emotional safety are some of the most powerful tools for helping children heal from abuse. They also discuss grief, rebuilding trust, and restoring family bonds after leaving an abusive relationship, offering hope and practical guidance for survivors seeking to break the cycle of coercive control.   Key Topics & Timestamps Introducing Dr. Christine Marie Cocchiola (00:01:34) The host introduces guest Dr. Cocchiola, detailing her expertise in coercive control, protective parenting, and her professional work. Dr. Cocchiola Personal Story (00:03:30) Dr. Cocchiola shares how she became an advocate at 19 and later realized she was in a coercively controlling relationship. The Abuser's Playbook (00:05:04) The speakers discuss how abusers follow a predictable pattern of behavior, which can help victims anticipate their next moves. Repairing Relationships with Children (00:06:38) Laura discusses repairing her relationship with her adult children after leaving her marriage and apologizing for her reactive behavior. Reframing "Reactive Abuse" (00:07:45) Dr. Cocchiola reframes "reactive abuse" as self-defense, explaining that victims' reactions are out of character and caused by trauma. How People End Up in Abusive Relationships (00:10:06) The speakers discuss how upbringing, whether good or bad, doesn't always predict who will end up in an abusive relationship. Supporting Children After They Visit the Abuser (00:12:41) Dr. Cocchiola explains how protective parents can co-regulate with their children and understand their behavior is a mouthpiece for the abuser. Defining Coercive Control (00:16:25) Dr. Cocchiola defines coercive control, explaining it includes psychological tactics, financial abuse, legal abuse, and weaponizing children. The Smear Campaign (02:11:04) Laura shares her experience of discovering her ex-partner's long-term smear campaign against her after their divorce. Identifying Power Dynamics in Therapy (00:24:36) Dr. Cocchiola demonstrates how a therapist can identify a power imbalance by asking specific questions about the relationship dynamics. The Dangers of Couples Counseling (00:27:06) Laura shares her negative experience with a marriage counselor who dismissed her concerns and sided with her ex-husband. Securing Attachment with Your Child (00:31:32) Dr. Cocchiola emphasizes creating a secure attachment by allowing children to be their authentic selves and providing unconditional love. Abusers Fracturing Family Relationships (00:35:34) The discussion covers how abusers triangulate and pit siblings against each other to maintain control and isolate family members. The Grief of Protective Parents (00:38:54) Dr. Cocchiola talks about the immense and disenfranchised grief protective parents experience when their relationship with their children is harmed. Hope for Protective Parents (00:46:04) Dr. Cocchiola offers a message of hope, reminding protective parents that they are their child's greatest healer and superpower. How to Connect with Dr. Cocchiola (00:48:18) Dr. Cocchiola shares where listeners can find her work, including her website, podcast, and TEDx talk.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Christine, "I would get rid of the word reactive abuse because when you are trapped in the den with the wolf, at some point you're going to fight back." Christine, "I'm here to say there's no judgment if you stay. People stay for a variety of reasons, and sometimes they have to." Christine, "The mothering that we all plan to be, the mothering we thought we'd all get to do—it's robbed from you."  Christine, "I want you to realize that you are your child's greatest healer, that you actually have a skill set that no one else on the planet has." Christine, "I think we forget how powerful the love we have for our children is, and we're so harmed by the abusive person we don't realize that's our superpower."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517   FOLLOW DR. CHRISTINE:  Website: www.coercivecontrolconsulting.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.cocchiola_coercivecontrol/ It's All Coercive Control TedX: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gp2qByKOue4 Every Moment of Every Day: https://a.co/d/07qnzCqm FRAMED: Women in the Family Court Underworld: https://a.co/d/04A40bT2 Perfect Prey: A Coercive Control Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/perfect-prey-a-coercive-control-podcast/id1704962170   "A protective parent's greatest strength is the unconditional love they never stop giving."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
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  EP 86: How Does Trauma Get Stored in the Body and How Can Somatic Healing Help? with Courtney Copeland 17.06.2026 55min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura speaks with Courtney Copeland, an Integrative Somatic Practitioner, trauma educator, and advocate who brings laughter, healing, and empowerment to clients and audiences around the world. With a Master's Degree in Human Services Counseling and certifications in Integrative Somatic Healing, Thought Field Therapy Algorithms, and other trauma-informed modalities, Courtney combines professional expertise with lived experience to help people understand how trauma impacts both the mind and body. Her work has included serving as Co-Clinical Director for the Tidewater Emergency Medical Services Critical Incident Stress Management team and providing mental health and crisis intervention training for first responders. Together, Laura and Courtney explore how trauma is stored in the body and often manifests as physical symptoms, as well as the role of modalities such as EMDR, somatic therapy, and nervous system regulation in the healing process. Courtney explains how laughter, crying, movement, and other body-centered practices can help release trapped emotions and support recovery. They also discuss the importance of finding the right therapist, advocating for your needs in the healing journey, and building a personalized toolkit for resilience and growth. Drawing from both her professional background and real-life experiences, Courtney offers practical, compassionate insights designed to help listeners feel seen, understood, and empowered. She also shares details about her upcoming podcast, Trauma Intersections, and her program, Start With Just One Breath, which provides accessible, body-centered tools for navigating trauma and healing.   Key Topics & Timestamps Guest Introduction: Courtney Copeland (00:01:20) Laura introduces guest Courtney Copeland, an integrative somatic practitioner, and her holistic approach to processing trauma stored in the body. Courtney's Journey into Trauma Work (00:02:18) Courtney shares her personal story of becoming a trauma professional after a career change and her education in Human Services. How Trauma is Stored in the Body (00:03:19) An explanation of how the body keeps a record of trauma, sometimes causing emotional immaturity and physical ailments. Identifying and Processing Stored Trauma (00:04:46) Courtney explains her approach to helping clients identify and process past traumatic events that are affecting their present behavior. Understanding EMDR (00:08:50) The discussion covers EMDR therapy, how it works without reliving trauma, and its origins from a walk in the park. The Importance of Professional Guidance (00:11:55) Courtney advises working with a trained professional for deep trauma work like EMDR to ensure safety and proper guidance. What is a Somatic Practitioner? (00:14:29) Courtney explains somatic work, which uses the body's senses and holistic practices to help release stored trauma and tension. The Body's Physical Release of Trauma (00:17:44) Discussion on how physical activities like yoga and deep breathing can trigger the release of trapped emotions through shaking or crying. Finding the Right Therapist (00:20:31) The importance of finding a therapist who is a good fit and knowing when it's time to move on. The Role of the Therapist (00:26:06) A therapist's job is to remain professional and supportive, creating a safe space for the client's story and emotions. The Catharsis of Crying (00:27:39) Crying is a natural way the body regulates its nervous system and releases emotions, and it shouldn't be suppressed. Self-Care After an Emotional Release (00:30:10) Courtney provides tips for self-care after a big emotional release, including nutrition, hydration, rest, and positive self-talk. The Healing Power of Laughter (00:32:57) Laughter is a powerful tool for healing as it helps regulate breathing and brings light into dark emotional spaces. Using Your Healing Toolkit (00:37:49) Healing involves using multiple tools and modalities; it's important to find what works for you and build a diverse toolkit. Advocating for Yourself in Therapy (00:44:52) Listeners are empowered to ask therapists about their training and to leave if it's not a good fit. Inner Child Work (00:48:05) The validity and healing power of inner child work, which involves comforting and reparenting the younger parts of yourself. The Gut-Brain Connection (00:52:44) Courtney explains how emotional distress often manifests physically in the gut due to the vagus nerve's extensive network. Courtney's Upcoming Projects (00:53:24) Courtney announces her new podcast, "Trauma Intersections," and two upcoming signature programs focused on healing and self-care.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Courtney, "I had an episode myself where I didn't have the support that I needed, so I went to grad school and became the person that I needed at that time." Courtney, "I let all that go. I'm proud of myself for letting that go. You don't have to carry it anymore." Courtney, "Laughter through tears is my favorite emotion." Courtney, "If you have a presenting client that is outside your skill set, you need to own up to it immediately." Laura, "That's where I found my voice, was in therapy and doing this kind of work."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517   FOLLOW COURTNEY: Website: www.thecourtneycopeland.com Instagram Link: https://www.instagram.com/traumaintersections Courtney's Podcast: https://podfollow.com/trauma-intersections/view   "Trauma may live in the body, but so does the capacity to heal."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
• 
  EP 85: Understanding Narcissistic Abuse and Coercive Control with Mardi Winder: A Strategic Guide for Women Facing Complex Divorces 10.06.2026 42min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura welcomes Mardi Winder, a Strategic Divorce Consultant, founder of Strategic Divorce Directory and Positive Communication Systems, host of The D Shift: Redefining Divorce and Beyond podcast, and creator of the Real Divorce Talks summit series. With more than 30 years of experience supporting individuals through high-conflict, complex, and high-asset divorces, Mardi specializes in helping clients navigate separation with greater clarity, confidence, and control while reducing the emotional and financial costs of the process. Drawing from her extensive background in mediation, executive and leadership coaching, emotional intelligence, and strategic communication, Mardi shares her expertise on navigating divorces involving narcissistic abuse and coercive control. She and Laura discuss the psychological tactics abusers use, including gaslighting, smear campaigns, and trauma bonding, as well as why leaving these relationships can be so difficult. Mardi also offers practical insights into mediation, decision-making, and the importance of building the right legal and professional support team. Throughout the conversation, both women share personal experiences and explore how narcissists often target strong, capable individuals while systematically undermining their confidence over time. This episode provides valuable education, practical resources, and reassurance that healing, empowerment, and a healthier future are possible after abuse and divorce.   Key Topics & Timestamps Navigating Mediation in High-Conflict Divorces (00:00:00) Mardi advises on using mediation, knowing your bottom line, and having an attorney on call to review any agreements. Podcast Introduction (00:01:00) Host Laura introduces the "That's Where I'm At" podcast, its mission to share stories, and help women heal. Guest Introduction: Mardi Wender (00:01:59) Laura welcomes strategic divorce consultant Mardi Wender and shares her extensive background in high-conflict divorce, mediation, and coaching. Mardi's Journey into Divorce Consulting (00:03:43) Mardi explains her background in family mediation, domestic violence advocacy, and how she transitioned to coaching targets of narcissists. Laura's Mediation Experience (00:07:08) Laura reflects on her own mediation, wishing she had representation and knew about narcissistic abuse and coercive control tactics. Pets and Kids in Abusive Relationships (00:10:48) Mardi discusses how pets and children are often used as leverage, making it difficult for victims to leave. The Trauma Bond and Feeling Stuck (00:11:35) Laura and Mardi discuss the trauma bond and how abusers erode their partner's confidence, making them feel incapable of leaving. The Slow Erosion of Self-Esteem (00:13:25) Laura shares how her ex-husband chipped away at her self-worth, making even her own father doubt her independence. Extreme Manipulation and Smear Campaigns (00:14:32) Mardi shares a story of a client whose husband drugged her to create a false narrative that she was an alcoholic. Gaslighting and Finding Clarity (00:16:10) Laura describes being gaslit into believing she was "crazy" and how understanding narcissistic abuse helped her start to heal. The Neuroscience of Narcissism (00:19:52) Mardi discusses the brain differences in narcissists and psychopaths, explaining why they lack conscientiousness and see everyone as a threat. "Super Traits" and How They're Exploited (00:23:01) Mardi explains how narcissists weaponize their partner's positive traits like loyalty, honesty, and commitment to maintain control. The Blame Game and Maintaining Integrity (00:24:28) Laura discusses how abusers shift blame, making their victims feel responsible for the relationship ending, despite the abuser's actions. Extreme Acquiescence in Abusive Relationships (00:25:54) Mardi shares a story of a client who was so manipulated she allowed her husband to bring sex workers home. Brainwashing and Cult-Like Dynamics (00:28:44) Mardi explains the elements of brainwashing and compares the dynamic in these relationships to being in a "cult of one." The Narcissist's Need for a Partner (00:33:12) Mardi explains that narcissists are empty vessels who need a partner for "narcissistic supply" and to maintain appearances. First Date Red Flags (00:35:28) Mardi offers tips for spotting a narcissist early on, such as turning questions back on them and testing their flexibility. Mardi's Podcast and Summits (00:37:30) Mardi talks about starting her podcast to provide resources and hosting free divorce summits to help people heal. The Power of Sharing Stories (00:40:03) Laura and Mardi discuss the importance of women sharing their stories and connecting with each other for support and healing.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Mardi, "I tell people it's literally like you've been a hostage, and you wouldn't ask a hostage to negotiate with the person that kidnapped them." Laura, "When I had a name for my pain and I understood narcissistic abuse, I was able to move forward because I was like, 'Oh, this is why they do this.'" Mardi, "It's never your fault. I really cannot stress this enough." Laura, "I have had women who are like, 'Yeah, but he's with somebody and I'm alone,' and I said, 'But you think that getting married is the prize when you are the prize.'" Mardi, "There's a power in sharing your story. There really is."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517   FOLLOW MARDI: WEBSITE: https://www.divorcecoach4women.com/ Freebie Resilience Building Blueprint: https://www.divorcecoach4women.com/rbb INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/divorcecoach4women/ YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@divorcecoach4women   "Leaving a narcissistic relationship isn't just ending a marriage—it's reclaiming the parts of yourself that were slowly taken away."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
• 
  EP 84: From Trauma to Thriving: Dr. Nadine Macaluso's Untold Story Behind The Wolf of Wall Street 03.06.2026 53min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura interviews Dr. Nadine Macaluso (Dr. Nae), the real-life inspiration behind Naomi Belfort in The Wolf of Wall Street. After surviving a turbulent eight-year marriage to Jordan Belfort marked by abuse, greed, trauma bonding, and coercive control, Dr. Nae transformed her own healing journey into a mission to help others reclaim their lives. Following her experiences, Dr. Nae returned to school at age 39, earning a Master's degree in counseling and a Ph.D. in somatic psychotherapy, along with advanced postdoctoral training in the Neuro-Affective Relational Model (NARM). Today, she is a licensed therapist specializing in trauma recovery, helping clients reconnect with their authentic selves, build resilience, and experience post-traumatic growth. In this powerful conversation, Dr. Nae shares her personal story of surviving an abusive relationship, the loss of identity that often accompanies coercive control, and the complex reality of trauma bonds. She also offers practical guidance on leaving safely, healing the nervous system, and cultivating self-compassion throughout the recovery process. Together, Laura and Dr. Nae explore how education, community, and inner healing can empower survivors to move beyond trauma and create lives rooted in confidence, agency, and hope.   Key Topics & Timestamps Guest Introduction: Doctor Nadine Macaluso (00:01:25) Laura introduces Doctor Nadine Macaluso (Doctor Nae), the real-life inspiration for Naomi Belfort in "The Wolf of Wall Street." The Beginning of the Relationship (00:02:53) Doctor Nae recounts how she met Jordan Belfort, the intense pursuit, and the extreme love bombing that quickly followed. Coercion into Marriage (00:07:49) Doctor Nae explains she didn't want to get married but was coerced with ultimatums, which she rationalized as intense love. Societal Pressures on Women (00:09:15) The discussion covers how societal messages in the 80s and 90s encouraged women to self-abandon for a "prince charming." The Importance of Setting Boundaries (00:11:36) Doctor Nae explains that setting a boundary with a pathological person will reveal their true nature through rage and resistance. Why Women Don't Leave (00:14:13) The conversation explores the complexities of trauma bonds, coercive control, and the intense fear that prevents women from leaving abusive relationships. Financial and Emotional Dependency (00:16:02) Doctor Nae discusses how abusers create financial and emotional dependency to maintain control, a key component of the trauma bond. Leaving Without a Trauma Bond (00:18:39) Doctor Nae explains she was "done" when she left and didn't experience a strong trauma bond, largely because his arrest shifted the power dynamic. Deciding to Share Her Story (00:21:23) Doctor Nae shares that she never intended to go public until her ex-husband wrote a book that became a movie. Becoming a Therapist (00:22:23) Inspired by how therapy saved her, Doctor Nae returned to school at 39 to become a therapist and help others. Supporting a Friend in a Trauma Bond (00:25:47) Doctor Nae advises friends to listen without judgment and keep communication open, asking if their friend wants to be heard, helped, or held. The Unsafe Way to Leave (00:26:53) Doctor Nae clarifies the movie's depiction of her divorce announcement, explaining the real, dangerous events that unfolded after she confronted him. The Safe Way to Leave (00:29:58) Doctor Nae outlines a strategic, secret plan for leaving an abuser, including gathering documents and finding a trauma-informed therapist. Somatic Psychotherapy and Healing (00:31:18) The discussion covers how trauma creates a biochemical addiction and how somatic work helps calm the nervous system and heal the body. The Loss of Self (00:34:41) Doctor Nae explains that losing one's identity is the number one symptom of a trauma bond, as you must abandon yourself. Remodeling Your Life After Abuse (00:36:41) Instead of rebuilding, Doctor Nae suggests women are "remodeling" their lives by rediscovering their strengths and authentic selves without pressure. Childhood and Vulnerability to Abuse (00:40:21) Doctor Nae dispels the myth that only those from abusive homes fall for predators, stating anyone can be a victim. First Steps After Realization (00:42:52) Doctor Nae advises women who realize they're in a toxic relationship to practice self-compassion and stabilize with dedicated self-care. From Surviving to Thriving (00:45:30) Doctor Nae discusses post-traumatic growth, where survivors can become stronger, have healthier relationships, and find their purpose after abuse. Post-Separation Abuse (00:48:00) The conversation highlights the reality of post-separation abuse through the court system and the importance of education and a good attorney. Breaking the Shame by Speaking Out (00:50:08) Doctor Nae emphasizes that sharing stories, as seen with some celebrities, is how the silence and shame around abuse are broken. Where to Find Doctor Nae (00:52:07) Doctor Nae shares her website and social media handles where listeners can find free resources, her community, and therapy information.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Doctor Nadine, 'In trauma bonds, we're really objects to have, not people to love.' Doctor Nadine, 'Slowly but surely, I lost my sense of self.' Doctor Nadine, 'Our torturer is our soother.' Doctor Nadine, 'When you've been in a trauma bond, you believe that self-care is selfish.' Doctor Nadine, 'It's not just about surviving it; it's like, "Okay, I survived this incredibly challenging experience. Now what do I want? What do I need? Who do I want to become?"'   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517   FOLLOW NADINE:  WEBSITE: https://drnae.com/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/therealdrnadine/ FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/drnaelmft TIK TOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@drnaelmft YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/c/TheRealDrNadine X: https://x.com/therealdrnadine BOOK: https://heal.drnae.com/giveaway-book-a?utm_campaign=bf&utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_keyword=book COURSE: https://course.drnae.com/trauma-bond-recovery-course-e?utm_keyword=tbrc30   "Healing begins when you stop asking who you were before the trauma and start discovering who you can become after it."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
• 
  EP 83: Breaking Generational Cycles: Amy Duggar King on Healing from Narcissistic Abuse and Religious Control 27.05.2026 57min

  In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura interviews Amy Duggar King, known from 19 Kids and Counting. Amy is a wife and mother who is determined to break the chains and cycles of abuse so her son, Dax, can have a healthier and happier future. Drawing from her own lived experiences, Amy openly shares her journey of healing, setting boundaries, and finding the courage to speak her truth. Together, Laura and Amy discuss growing up in a controlling, abusive family environment shaped by high-control religion and narcissistic dynamics. Amy opens up about confronting family scandals, breaking free from toxic cycles, and learning how to protect her peace and prioritize her healing. Throughout the conversation, both women emphasize how sharing stories can break shame, foster healing, and inspire others who may be navigating similar struggles.   Key Topics & Timestamps Podcast Introduction (00:00:42) Host Laura introduces the podcast's mission to share stories of healing from narcissistic abuse and toxic family dynamics. Guest Introduction: Amy Duggar King (00:01:40) Laura welcomes guest Amy Duggar King, a wife, mom, and cycle breaker known from the show "19 Kids and Counting." The Catalyst for Speaking Out (00:03:10) Amy explains that her grandmother's passing was the catalyst for seeing the family's unhealthy, controlling behavior and deciding to speak out. Breaking the Shame Cycle (00:04:32) Laura and Amy discuss how speaking out breaks the shame associated with abuse and helps others feel less alone. Relating to Amy's Story Beyond TV (00:05:49) Amy's story of narcissistic abuse resonates with many, regardless of the TV show fame, because it's a common experience. The Pressure to Forgive and Forget (00:07:40) Laura and Amy discuss the toxic pressure from evangelical backgrounds to simply "forgive and move on" without addressing the abuse. Navigating Family Contact and Boundaries (00:09:06) Amy shares that she is only in contact with her cousin Jill, as setting boundaries caused most family to disappear. Understanding Jim Bob's Controlling Nature (00:10:41) Amy discusses how her uncle Jim Bob's abusive upbringing likely led to his desire for control promised by IBLP. Unspoken Family Trauma (00:13:45) Amy explains she never questioned her family's dynamics growing up, as asking questions was seen as a "heart issue." High-Control Religion and Narcissism (00:15:42) The hosts discuss how high-control religious environments can be breeding grounds for narcissists who hide behind the cross. The Consequences of Questioning the System (00:18:10) Amy explains how questioning the family system leads to rejection, while her cousin Jill navigates it with strategic boundaries. The "Crazy" Nickname and Public Perception (00:21:16) Amy discusses being labeled "crazy" on the show for not conforming and how she was edited for a specific narrative. Surviving by Playing a Part (00:22:38) Amy shares how she had to hide her true self, even making up stories based on movie plots to survive. Discovering Family Scandals (00:24:14) Amy describes the earth-shattering experience of learning about her family's scandals on national television along with the public. Grieving the Living and What Could Have Been (00:26:09) Amy talks about the painful process of grieving living family members, especially her father, and the relationships she never had. The Pain and Healing of Writing a Book (00:28:46) Writing and narrating her book forced Amy to relive her trauma, which was painful but also a part of healing. Childhood Patterns and Trauma Bonds (00:30:05) The hosts discuss how childhood abuse patterns and trauma bonds can normalize toxic behavior and influence future relationships. Breaking the Cycle for the Next Generation (00:32:33) Amy and her mom are healing their inner children by creating a safe, peaceful, and joyful home for Amy's son. The Rules of High-Control Religion (00:35:57) Amy discusses the controlling rules she faced, from clothing colors and hairstyles to being shamed for her appearance. Arbitrary Rules and Shifting Goalposts (00:42:21) Amy explains how family rules were arbitrary and would change on a whim, a classic tactic in high-control environments. Embracing the "Crazy" Label (00:45:45) Amy shares how she eventually embraced the "crazy" label given to her, deciding to live freely and be adventurous. Confronting Josh Duggar (00:46:58) Amy recounts the moment she decided to confront her cousin Josh about his actions after feeling deceived by her family. The Aftermath and Lack of Therapy (00:51:20) Amy explains that IBLP teachings discourage outside therapy, so she believes most of the girls involved never received proper help. What's Next for Amy (00:52:39) Amy shares her plans to write a self-help book and potentially start a podcast with her husband to help others. Podcast Wrap-Up and Final Thoughts (00:54:36) Laura and Amy conclude by encouraging listeners to question unhealthy dynamics and run from relationships that require walking on eggshells.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Amy, "It wasn't my fault. I didn't do anything to deserve this." Amy, "I cannot stand the people that hide behind the cross." Amy, "I feel like a part of me, my inner child, is healing and so is my mom's." Amy, "I literally felt like I was living in The Truman Show. What is my reality? What is even real?" Amy, "Ask yourself if you want to keep walking on eggshells the rest of your life."   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517 FOLLOW AMY: WEBSITE: Website: https://amyduggarking.com/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/amyrachelleking/ BOOK: Holy Disruptor: https://a.co/d/002mJZvi   "A healed life begins the moment you stop protecting toxic systems and start protecting yourself."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.
• 
  EP 82: Breaking the Silence on Hidden Abuse with Lynn Stroud: Reproductive Coercion and Financial Control 20.05.2026 56min

  In this powerful episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura welcomes Lynn Stroud, a paralegal, advocate, and survivor of reproductive coercion, sexual assault, domestic violence, and post-separation abuse. Through both her lived experience and advocacy work, Lynn is passionate about helping others recognize the many forms of abuse that often go unseen and misunderstood. She hopes to provide a roadmap for listeners to become more trauma-informed while encouraging survivors to prioritize their safety, self-respect, and financial autonomy. Lynn shares her deeply personal experiences with reproductive coercion, narcissistic abuse, financial abuse, and the failures of the family court system. Together, Laura and Lynn discuss the reality that abuse extends far beyond physical violence, the subtle warning signs many survivors miss, and the challenges of navigating life after leaving an abusive relationship. With honesty, insight, and compassion, Lynn's story serves as both a warning and a source of hope for survivors working to reclaim their lives and move toward healing.   Key Topics & Timestamps Podcast Introduction (00:00:31) Host Laura introduces the podcast's mission to share women's stories of struggle and healing to combat loneliness and secrecy. Trigger Warning (01:22) A brief warning is given that the episode's content may be triggering for some listeners due to its sensitive nature. Guest Introduction: Lynn (01:30) Lynn, a survivor of various forms of abuse and a paralegal advocate, is introduced to the show. Why Lynn Shares Her Story (02:19) Lynn explains she began sharing her story to help other women identify red flags and feel less alone in their experiences. The Power of Naming Abuse (03:27 The host and Lynn discuss how naming abuse, like narcissistic or emotional abuse, provides validation and reduces shame for survivors. Defining Reproductive Coercion (07:02) Lynn defines reproductive coercion as behavior intended to control reproductive health, including birth control sabotage and pregnancy pressure. First Experience with Reproductive Coercion (09:11) At 20, Lynn's older boyfriend intentionally got her pregnant after her birth control patch failed, pressuring her to marry him. Escalation of Abuse and Stalking (18:06) After the abortion, the ex-boyfriend's abuse intensified, leading to a cycle of breakups, stalking, and a terrifying home break-in. Reproductive Coercion in Marriage (24:21) Lynn's ex-husband exhibited addictive behaviors and emotionally withdrew during their struggles with infertility and miscarriages, creating another form of coercion. Pressure for a Male Heir (30:58) Two weeks postpartum, Lynn's ex-husband began pressuring her to get pregnant again, specifically to have a son. The Breaking Point (34:07) The marriage ended after her ex-husband threatened her while she was holding their 11-month-old baby, leading to their separation. Post-Separation and Financial Abuse (39:09) After separating, Lynn faced financial abuse when her ex-husband cut off her access to money, leaving her unable to pay bills. Failures of the Family Court System (40:19 Lynn describes being treated poorly by judges and the court system, which failed to protect her and her child. The Dangers of the "Trad Wife" Trend (49:06) The conversation touches on the dangers of traditional gender roles that can leave women financially dependent and trapped in abusive situations. Parental Alienation and Men's Rights Groups (50:46) Lynn discusses how men's rights groups have influenced family court, often discrediting protective mothers by accusing them of parental alienation. How to Find Lynn (53:47) Lynn shares her social media handles on LinkedIn and Instagram for listeners who wish to connect with her.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Lynn, 'I felt like if I could call out some of the behavior and red flags, it could possibly help other survivors realize they're in danger and try to get away from their abuser.' Lynn, 'He saw an opportunity to control me, to trap me into a relationship with him. He thought that once he got me pregnant, I would have the baby, and that would hold control over me and I would never leave.' Lynn, 'I eventually felt like I was made to feel like I was failing as a spouse and as a woman.' Lynn, 'You cannot change someone that doesn't want to change. You could legitimately lose yourself and your life in the process. It's not worth it.' Lynn, 'I want women out there to know that they are not alone.'   RESOURCES: FOLLOW THE PODCAST: https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517 FOLLOW LYNN: INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/knowledge_exch_abuse_survivors LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lynn-s-16878b6/   "Abuse isn't always bruises you can see — sometimes it's control that slowly steals your safety, voice, and freedom."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.