The Montoyas

Epizode

• 
  Marcelo the Intern 12.08.2026 59min

  Marcelo had his first trip to the doctor since retirement and couldn't believe how many questions he needed to answer just for his pink eye. Tay has setup her own nail salon in the house much to Marcelo's displeasure. We trick Marcelo into thinking he has a gift at the viral '3 second timer' challenge. Plus, Ange Lombardi took on a shark and lived to tell the tale! If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.auDownload SAILY in your app store and use our code "Montoyas" at checkout to get an exclusive 15% off your first purchase! For further details go to ⁠https://saily.com/montoyas
• 
  Leaky Eye Marce & Tonsillitis Tay 05.08.2026 59min

  It's been a tough week for the Montoyas. Marcelo has come back from his Melbourne trip with pink eye and Tay's had tonsillitis all week (who gets these things as adults?) They discuss dressing twins the same, crazy wedding reddit stories, and Marce's odd interaction with a Collingwood supporter. Plus, we have a brand new script reading thanks to one of our beautiful Patreon members! If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.auDownload SAILY in your app store and use our code "Montoyas" at checkout to get an exclusive 15% off your first purchase! For further details go to ⁠https://saily.com/montoyasGo and checkout @thelaundryhaus_ on Instagram and send them some love and support! https://www.instagram.com/thelaundryhaus_/
• 
  French Fried 29.07.2026 1h 11min

  The Farewell Tour is officially over. Marcelo's glistening NRL career came to an end last Saturday night, but it was his two daughters who seemed to steal the show..Now the big question is; how will Marce adapt to working in an office every day? Tay gives us a break down of all the Love Island lingo and what has been happening on the latest episodes, she reveals her recent spending at Kookai, and the big name guests she plans to have on for the next edition of 'couples couch'. Plus, a special announcement on our sold out hats!All this and more!If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.auDownload SAILY in your app store and use our code "montoyas" at checkout to get an exclusive 15% off your first purchase! For further details go to ⁠https://saily.com/montoyas00:00 - Welcome01:30 - Retirement08:30 - First day of the new job24:00 - Bulldogs Warriors game30:00 - Kookai 36:00 - Gus Gould40:00 - Filling up with petrol44:00 - Tay and the gym47:00 - Merch announcement50:00 - What we are invested in: Love Island01:03:30 - Arseleaker hotline
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  If Toes Could Kill 22.07.2026 56min

  After receiving a flood of DMs and comments following last week's episode, Tayla and Marcelo realised they'd done the one thing they never intended to do... offend their listeners. So this week, they issue a heartfelt public apology from the bottom of their hearts. Will they learn from their mistakes? Fingers Crossed. Will it last? Well... at least for this episode.Tayla also celebrated a huge milestone in the gym, hitting her very first PB. It turns out all she needed was a new gym buddy who actually knows what they're doing. After years of convincing herself she'd been training hard, Tayla has come to the shocking realisation that she may have just been turning up. As it happens, nothing brings out her competitive side quite like having an audience in every single aspect of her life.Plus, thanks to Blue Wealth Property, we finally reach the last few pages of An Empyrean Awakening. After weeks of twists, questionable acting, and Marcelo's ever-growing collection of accents, the masterpiece comes to an end. Tayla finally unveils an accent of her own, while Marcelo delivers a closing performance as "The Guru" that leaves the door wide open for a sequel. If you think Tayla should write another script—or you've got ideas for the next one—let us know in the comments.If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.auDownload SAILY in your app store and use our code "montoyas" at checkout to get an exclusive 15% off your first purchase! For further details go to ⁠https://saily.com/montoyas
• 
  Normal Brave Or Stupid 15.07.2026 52min

  Before we even managed to hit record this week, Tayla somehow found herself in a battle with... a boulder. After one final mirror check before heading into the studio, she confidently flung open the door without looking and was immediately met with an almighty bang. Her only defence? "Just be grateful it wasn't a car." Safe to say, tensions were running high before the microphones were even switched on.Tayla also expanded her culinary repertoire this week by buying a slow cooker and whipping up a beef ragu that Marcelo rated a perfect 10/10. In what should have been a rare and wholesome moment, Marcelo finally gave Tayla a genuine compliment about her cooking. Unfortunately, it only lasted a few seconds before he pointed out that the only thing slower than the slow cooker... was Tayla herself. So close to a heartfelt moment.Plus, thanks to Blue Wealth Property, Tayla's high school script An Empyrean Awakening returns for another chapter. Marcelo dusts off his ever-growing collection of accents, unveils one he's been secretly practising, and somehow the script gets even more chaotic. And if all goes to plan, Tayla might finally give an accent a crack herself next week.If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.auDownload SAILY in your app store and use our code "montoyas" at checkout to get an exclusive 15% off your first purchase! For further details go to https://saily.com/montoyas
• 
  Couples Couch with the Arrows 08.07.2026 1h 42min

  Welcome to the very first episode of Couples Couch. For our debut, we're joined by two very special guests, Jai and Beri Arrow, who sat down with us just five hours after saying "I do" to hard-launch married life.Together, we talk about how they first met, the journey that brought them together, becoming parents, and the moments that have shaped their relationship. Jai and Beri share, with incredible honesty, the journey that led to Jai's diagnosis of Motor Neurone Disease. Jai opens up about the moment something clicked after attending a Fight MND fundraiser, the conversations that followed, and the testing that ultimately confirmed what he feared. It's an emotional and deeply personal conversation, but one that's filled with courage, perspective, and the remarkable attitude Jai continues to face every day with.We're incredibly grateful to Jai and Beri for trusting us with their story, and we hope it helps bring greater awareness to Motor Neurone Disease and the people and families living with it.If you're in a position to support the fight against Motor Neurone Disease, you can donate here:https://support.fightmnd.org.au/donateYou can also show your support this Jai July as the NRL and the South Sydney Rabbitohs host the "World's Biggest Birthday Party" during their clash with the Newcastle Knights at Accor Stadium on Sunday, July 12, celebrating Jai's 31st birthday while raising awareness for FightMND. Every conversation, donation and show of support makes a difference.
• 
  The Shire Sangria 01.07.2026 56min

  *Join our Patreon* Sign up for a bonus episode each week and more, exclusive to paid subscribers. Plus massive news for Patreon subscribers, listen out in this weeks Patreon episode, you now have access to our hotline to leave us a message!Last week, Tayla made an appearance on the Bye Round fundraiser stream for Jai Arrow and, after discovering the magic of a bottle of red mixed with Diet Coke (now known as "The Shire Sangria"), things escalated extremely quickly. What started as a fun night out ended with an Uber ride home and Marcelo being woken up by the unmistakable sounds that no sober person ever wants to hear in the middle of the night.If that wasn't enough, the rest of the week didn't get much better. After going out to grab a coffee, Tayla somehow turned a simple café run into a public spectacle. Attempting to parallel park a large SUV outside a busy Cronulla café, she quickly found herself with a growing audience, traffic backing up all around, four failed attempts, a couple of kerbed tyres, and one innocent bystander who copped the full force of her frustration.Plus, thanks to Blue Wealth Property, Tayla's university script returns — and somehow it's even more out the gate than before. The mysterious Fijian woman is back, new characters enter the story, Marcelo abandons the script and a Kiwi accent makes its debut. At this point, we're all just along for the ride.
• 
  A Mysterious Fijian Woman 24.06.2026 1h 4min

  After Marcelo announced his retirement last week, Susan Lombardi decided it was her responsibility to break the news to Tayla's Nono and Nona. Unfortunately, instead of keeping things simple and telling the truth, she turned the whole thing into a dramatic Italian soap opera, leaving poor Nona in tears and everyone else wondering how things escalated so quickly.Tayla tries once again to convince Marcelo to join her at the gym next year so they can finally work out together and, more importantly, so she can prove she actually works hard when she's there. Marcelo isn't buying it for a second. Instead, he launches into a dramatic re-enactment of the time he walked into the lounge to find Tayla doing a Tabata workout while simultaneously watching reality TV. Surprisingly, nobody was shocked by this revelation.After last week's cliffhanger, it's finally time. Tayla's university script has arrived. Titled "An Empyrean Awakening", Tayla and Marcelo bring a scene to life on the podcast and quickly discover some very interesting similarities between the story and their own lives. Including one particular character whose name is a little too close to home.If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.au
• 
  Someone's Got Big News 17.06.2026 1h 20min

  Firstly, a massive shoutout to Voli K who recently reached out to collaborate with the podcast and has actually made music specifically for The Montoyas! You'll hear his work in today's intro and we absolutely love it. Huge thanks to him. At this rate, when we finally do a live show, we might even have live music from the man himself.Tayla's friend came over this week and immediately expressed concern that Tayla still hasn't booked her nose surgery. Why? Because she'd gone down a rabbit hole researching what happens to chronic mouth breathers over time and apparently it's not pretty. The biggest concern is developing a recessed chin which, according to the internet, is every mouth breather's worst nightmare. Will this finally be the thing that gets Tayla to book the surgery? The jury's still out.Meanwhile, on his day off, Marcelo found himself living out one of his biggest fanboy moments after meeting one of his Top 3 celebrities, Neil Whitaker, at a mental health lunch. If you've listened to the podcast for a while, you'll know Marcelo's obsession with all things real estate. Not only did he get to meet Neil, but he was also bold enough to ask him for a personalised video message for a special someone... and the result is absolutely legendary.Plus, The Montoyas have a MAJOR announcement to share in this episode. Any guesses? A second sausage dog? We've finally landed a sponsor? We're adding another weekly episode? Drop your predictions in the comments and tune in to find out.If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.au
• 
  Chat GPT Exposes Tayla 10.06.2026 47min

  *Join our Patreon* Sign up for a bonus episode each week and more, exclusive to paid subscribers. Plus massive news for Patreon subscribers, listen out in this weeks Patreon episode, you now have access to our hotline to leave us a message! Marcelo has never been shy about his dislike of Tayla being glued to her phone, and this week he finally gets some answers. After discovering most of her screen time is spent firing an endless stream of questions at ChatGPT, Marcelo asks the question we're all thinking: "What are the most outrageous things you've ever asked ChatGPT?" Tayla bravely opens the vault, but would you be willing to share your search history with the world?Meanwhile, Tayla joins the 5am gym crowd and quickly finds herself in a very unexpected situation. While struggling through a workout, a friendly stranger offers to oil one of the machines to make it run smoother. Assuming he'd wandered over from the maintenance team, Tayla gladly accepts the help… only to discover he's actually just a local gym hero, quietly roaming the floor helping those in need with a can of WD-40. A true man of the people!Plus, we may have received one of the greatest calls ever on the Ass Leaker Hotline. In the middle of a truly unfortunate situation, one listener decided this was exactly the place to share their story — and we're very grateful they did.If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.au
• 
  We've Been Scammed 03.06.2026 1h 5min

  Thank you to everyone who has joined our Patreon, we’ve just hit a massive milestone of 1,000 subscribers!! In today’s episode the Montoyas are drawing out three lucky “ass leakers” who will get to sit in on a recording soon, well…when we can finally nail down Marcelo's schedule. The Montoyas are truly grateful for every “multi tasker” and “ass leaker” who supports the show! We have big plans for 2026 so keep and eye out on more announcements coming your way.Tayla woke up on the wrong side of the bed, we all know how that feels! Marcelo started with good intentions and decided to clean Tayla’s car. Unfortunately the clean freak in him couldn’t ignore the chaos he found inside, Louie the sausage dog had vomited and the twins' snacks were littered all over the place. Instead of using his better judgment and ignoring the situation, Marcelo confronted Tayla… I’m sure you can guess her response!Just like your aunty on Facebook marketplace, the Montoyas have been scammed! There’s a fake Facebook page “TheMontoyas291” with a bigger audience than the real page, how does that even happen!? The page has been reported as being fake but we need your help, please report it on Facebook and if you don’t already follow the real page help us out! If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.au
• 
  Up The Blues 27.05.2026 53min

  *Join our Patreon* Sign up for a bonus episode each week and more, exclusive to paid subscribers. Plus massive news for Patreon subscribers, listen out in this weeks Patreon episode, you now have access to our hotline to leave us a message! Plus if you hang around to the end if we have a special announcement for once we hit 1k followersMarcelo shares who he’s supporting in the State of Origin, the NSW Blues. He even has a team shirt and a special match worn jersey from Mitch Barnett himself hung in the background. In the process of sharing his love for the team, Tayla discovers she has a new ick…Luke Lombardi’s appearance on the show last week has ruffled some serious feathers in the Lombardi household! Sue wants a second chance and has been preparing her show notes…the problem is Tayla and Marcelo aren’t sure, they thought Sue wasn’t being her “true authentic self” last time. In comes Tayla’s father, Ange, he’s also vying for a slot on the show to share his truth. Stay tuned to find out who the Montoyas have confirmed as the next family guest! After playing again in the Bulldogs last week, Marcelo’s body had a few aches and pains and he needed some good old Fijian treatment. His mum Litiana, came through to save the day. Her treatment this time was a very creative solution involving a trip to Fiji and holy water!?If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.au
• 
  Childhood Trauma with Luke Lombardi 20.05.2026 1h

  *Join our Patreon* Sign up for a bonus episode each week and more, exclusive to paid subscribers. Plus massive news for Patreon subscribers, listen out in this weeks Patreon episode, you now have access to our hotline to leave us a message!The Montoyas welcome their third guest to the show, Tayla’s brother, Luke Lombardi! Luke has been trying to score this slot for months, he was upset Sue got invited before him and gave Tayla a piece of his mind. Tayla keeps the vibes tense by bringing up some good old childhood trauma, get your popcorn ready!Tayla is blindsided when Marcelo shares a story she never thought would see the light of day. It follows a common theme, toilets. As a result, Tayla and Marcelo agree to clear stories with each other before bringing them to the podcast…where’s the fun in that! Time will tell…Tayla shares her dislike of PDA, she recently was subjected to it at the gym of all places! A young couple who maybe had nowhere else to go, were condoodling across from her in some very intimate positions that didn’t leave much to the imagination! If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.au
• 
  The Nose Job Verdict 13.05.2026 51min

  *Join our Patreon* Sign up for a bonus episode each week and more, exclusive to paid subscribers. Plus massive news for Patreon subscribers, listen out in this weeks Patreon episode, you now have access to our hotline to leave us a message!The Montoyas take a trip to the pricy Syndry suburb of Double Bay for a very important consultation. Tayla’s nose job. They quickly feel out priced when they notice the extravagant memorabilia on the wall of the surgeons office. They’re in too deep and need an exist strategy! Marcelo comes to the rescue and saves the team from a potential $38k commitment!! Marcelo hardly drives Tayla’s car, last week he did and noticed her car key was looking worse for wear. Deciding to take the high road, he doesn’t bring it up. Only for Tayla to accuse him of breaking it that very same night!? The audacity!Tayla shares a story from back when they lived in New Zealand. They needed to find a new rental and end up taking a tour of a strangers house thinking it was their open home appointment. Only to discover they had been mistaken for Facebook marketplace buyers…
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  Undies For Mothers Day 06.05.2026 50min

  *Join our Patreon* Sign up for a bonus episode each week and more, exclusive to paid subscribers. Plus massive news for Patreon subscribers, listen out in this weeks Patreon episode, you now have access to our hotline to leave us a message!Both Tayla and Marcelo’s mum, Litiana, have been using Dr Instagram for their health advice. They were both influenced to take turmeric for its health benefits, little did they know, an unintended consequence of taking too much turmeric is, you guessed it… diarrhea. We’ll let you be the judge of who did and didn’t make it to the toilet on time!  Mothers Day is fast approaching, the Montoyas reflect on the gifts they have given to their mums over the years. Unfortunately they both learn a hard truth, neither Litiana or Sue have particularly enjoyed or even liked the gifts they had received!? Is this a right of passage for any parent, or will the Montoyas change the narrative for their family?Tayla has been taking Louie the sausage dog out on more walks in an effort to help her mental health. On a recent walk around their neighbourhood a poodle came to say hello,  Louie being the big, strong, intimidating dog he thinks he is, goes into full family protection mode… ending in embarrassment and regret for Tayla. If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.au
• 
  Migraines, Sleepovers & A Haunted House 29.04.2026 1h 2min

  *Join our Patreon* Sign up for a bonus episode each week and more, exclusive to paid subscribers. Plus massive news for Patreon subscribers, listen out in this weeks Patreon episode, you now have access to our hotline to leave us a message!Tayla has been struggling with migraines lately, she’s seen the doctor three times and even went to a therapist. With no relief in sight, Marcelo's mum Litana offers to help by looking after the twins and stays the night. From the moment she walked into the house she felt bad vibes, the vibes must have been strong, she claims she woke up with a headache! Who’s got the sage??Tayla's inner cheapskate comes out again, she shares a story about a NYE holiday in Thailand. Of course she had to book the cheapest accommodation, keeping with the bad vibes theme, it was right next to a cemetery! Tayla ended up having a crazy episode of sleep paralysis, lucky Marcelo was there to save her.A great DM came in from an audience member asking about Tayla and Marcelo’s most embarrassing moments when meeting the in-laws. Tayla shares how Marcelo taught her a Fijian word, that she innocently used it in conversation. Can we guess where this is going? You guessed it, a Fijian telling off was in store for Marcelo.If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.auDownload SAILY in your app store and use our code montoyas at checkout to get an exclusive 15% off your first purchase! For further details go to https://saily.com/montoyas
• 
  Marcelo Lost His Wedding Ring 22.04.2026 1h 10min

  *Join our Patreon*Sign up for a bonus episode each week and more, exclusive to paid subscribers. Plus massive news for Patreon subscribers listen out in this weeks episode you've now got access to your own hotline to leave messages to the guys.Marcelo has something to confess this week...after multiple close calls he's finally gone and done it, he lost his wedding ring!! The Montoya's attempt to retrace his steps and find it, all they find is disappointment and denial. One of them accepts it's gone, the other just can't, any guesses? Tayla had a revelation this week after watching a Jay Shetty podcast about ADHD, she took the online test and unofficial diagnosis is in, she has ADHD!? Marcello doesn't buy it obviously, but as Tayla outlines the common traits, the similarities are too crazy to ignore. The Tayla has an impromptu visit from Tayla's Nona that leads to a story about what it's like living in a nursing home. Nona drops a bombshell, one of her friends remarries a fellow nursing home resident and didn't tell her family!! Tayla turns to Reddit and finds out more than she bargained for, promiscuity in nursing homes is off the charts! If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.auUpNxt | Grab your Nancy Ajram tickets here: https://premier.ticketek.com.au/shows/show.aspx?sh=NAJAM26 or use the QR code on screen
• 
  Nose Jobs For Everyone Featuring Susan Lombardi 15.04.2026 1h 11min

  The Montoyas welcome their second guest… You’ve been asking for her and she's finally here, it’s Tayla’s mum, Susan Lombardi! She came prepared and is ready to settle things once and for all, you don’t want to miss this. Tayla finally steals a moment to scroll social media uninterrupted by the twins, in the one room of the house where closing the door should be a given, you guessed it, the toilet. Her scroll time is rudely interrupted by a call from Marcelo, the mute button was used and fibs were told.Tayla has had her long anticipated appointment with an ear, nose & throat specialist. Does she find out why it always sounds like her nose is blocked, why no matter how long she sleeps she’s always tired? Does she need surgery, could squeeze in a 2for1 deal? If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.auUpNxt | Grab your Nancy Ajram tickets here: https://premier.ticketek.com.au/shows/show.aspx?sh=NAJAM26 or use the QR code on screen
• 
  The Defamation of Tayla Montoya 08.04.2026 48min

  *Join our Patreon* Sign up for a bonus episode each week and more, exclusive to paid subscribers.Marcelo's mum Litiana joins the Lombardi family for Easter and has a front row seat to Tayla’s Nonno sharing his expert injury analysis of the NRL easter game. Out with the Pannatonne, a new Italian fruit bread is in town, have you tried the easter specialty Colomba?Tayla overhears Marcelo ordering a “Montoya wrap” from the local cafe…turns out he has a special off menu item especially for him, what in the diva! He needs extra, extra protein, 3 eggs, halloumi and bacon. The cafe is used to his diva behaviour but Tayla is understandably shocked and embarrassed. In this week's Blue Wealth Property segment we learn the Montoyas were invested in a viral Chris Brown clip of him necking on a married woman! Tayla poses a hypothetical question to Marcelo, what would he do if his dream of being on stage with Mariah Carey came true?If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.auUpNxt | Grab your Nancy Ajram tickets here: ⁠https://bit.ly/40PT65n
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  The Race We've All Been Waiting For 01.04.2026 1h 5min

  *Join our Pateron*Sign up for a bonus episode each week and more, exclusive to paid subscribers.The time has finally come. In an amazing feat of endurance and athleticism, Tayla has…drum roll please…completed her bronco! We know you’ve been dying to know her final time, check out the full video on our YouTube this Friday.Tayla and her mum Sue take the twins for a follow up pediatrician appointment, the wait time tips them over the edge. The doctors office didn’t know what was coming, disagreements were had, accusations flew and tensions were high!We have a new segment this week, bought to you by Blue Wealth Property. Find out what the Montoyas invested in this week, we promise it’s not what you think! Tayla learns a leopard can change its spots, Marcelo confesses he does like reality TV! Below deck fans we have a new member! If you want to find out more about Blue Wealth Property email montoyas@bluewealth.com.auUpNxt | Grab your Nancy Ajram tickets here: https://bit.ly/40PT65nAlso download SAILY in your app store and use our code montoyas at checkout to get an exclusive 15% off your first purchase! For further details go to https:saily.com/montoyas