Love Inside Out with Adele Testa

Episode

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  Replay #9: 3 communication secrets 12.08.2026 11mnt

  A short yet rich summary of communications gems to steal and apply straight away.Extract from episode 17.
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  Heart Note 9: the power of walk & talk in Love 09.08.2026 15mnt

  Why your hardest conversations keep dying at the kitchen table and where they come back to lifeYou sat down to talk about it properly. Two chairs, phones down, "we need to talk." And it went nowhere. Then, days later, walking the long way home, the exact same conversation just… comes out.This week's Heart Note is about why. There's a Kyoto University study in here you'll want to test tonight, and a method I stumbled into while pregnant that she and my partner still use for every big decision, including the home they're about to move into.Come for the reframe. Leave with a walk to take.
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  Replay #8: The secrets of strong couples 05.08.2026 18mnt

  Nobody posts the argument in the car park. We only ever see the highlight reel and then wonder why our own love doesn't look like that.This week's Summer Replay pulls back the curtain on the so- called power couple. What's actually holding those decades-long relationships together isn't chemistry or grand gestures.It's something far less glamorous, and far more learnable.If you've ever compared your relationship to someone else's and felt behind, this episode is for you. Partnered or single.Save it. You'll want it on a harder day.Stay curious. Be brave. 🤎
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  Heart Note #8: Long distance relationship in summer 03.08.2026 15mnt

  Winter is supposed to be the hard part of long distance. So why does summer quietly wreck people even more?The longer evenings, the barbecues, the parks full of couples, the photo where your person looks genuinely happy without you: none of it makes distance easier. It competes for the attention that used to be yours by default. And that tightening in your chest when their night looks perfect and you're not in it? It isn't jealousy. It's something quieter, and once you can name it, it loosens its grip.This episode is for the grown-ups doing distance for real reasons, such as a job, a parent, a life split across two postcodes. We get into the jealousy, the FOMO, the countdown that makes you cancel your own summer, and the one small thing that changes how the whole season feels.Press play before your next lonely evening.
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  Replay #7: how expectations damage your relationship and dating experience 29.07.2026 10mnt

  From episode 13, today we speak about the invisible contract: all the things you expect from love that you never actually said out loud. In this episode I cover the difference between assumptions, standards, and expectations, and why the silence around them is what really damages our relationships. I explore where these hidden rules come from: our families, our culture, the movies we grew up on, and the exes who left scars we mistook for boundaries. I share my own messy rule book too. And I give you two simple heart work exercises to start making the invisible visible. Enjoy a cold drink over this hot day in JulyGet in touch at @adele_thecoach
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  Heart Note #7: Visiting the in-laws and what to watch for 27.07.2026 18mnt

  Holidays with the in-laws are the narrative of many TV comedies for a reason. We treat the family visit as something to survive and as a chance to assess who we've ended up with. But a family holiday is a mirror, and it gets held up to both of you.This week, I explore what a summer trip to the in-laws really reveals: why your partner regresses at their mother's kitchen table (and why it's loyalty, not weakness), what family researchers call differentiation, and the childhood role that's waiting for each of us, folded by the door like an old cot.The invitation is to watch yourself first, your body, your role, and the moment you choose tenderness over a scorecard.🤎 Heard something that landed? DM me on Instagram @adele_thecoach
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  Replay #6: How do compromise and gratitude overlap in love? 23.07.2026 16mnt

  Have you ever talked yourself out of asking for something you needed, because it could be worse?At least he doesn't cheat. At least she's loyal. At least they come home every evening.We call it gratitude. Sometimes it is. And sometimes it's just the most socially acceptable way to stay quiet about something that actually matters to us.This episode is about the blurry line between the gratitude and compromise, and the moment gratitude stops being a practice and starts being a hiding place.I'll share the difference between healthy gratitude, and the version that quietly silences you. One makes room for both truths. The other slowly makes you smaller.We look at what playing small actually sounds like such as the apology before the need, the I don't mind when you very much do mind, the light you dim so you don't outshine someone else. And we look at how men play small too, quietly and almost invisibly, in a way that rarely gets talked about. If you've ever watched a partner go from present to merely polite, that part is for you.This isn't an anti-gratitude episode. Gratitude is one of the most beautiful practices we have, and it's part of my own Buddhist practice. But gratitude and desire were never opposites. You can be grateful AND ask for more.You'll leave with one question and reflections to sit with this week.And if you're single right now, stay with me. This pattern doesn't wait for a relationship to show up: it starts much earlier, in friendships, in family, in the way we learn to take up less room everywhere.If someone comes to mind while you're listening, send it to them. Sometimes that's the whole conversation.Ciao 🤎
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  Heart Note #6: Whose summer are you actually trying to have? 19.07.2026 14mnt

  You opened your phone to check one thing and there they were. The single friend "finally having her summer." The couple who make it all look effortless. And you, on a perfectly ordinary evening, somehow feeling behind on both.This week's Heart Note sits with that quiet ache: the two summers we're told to perform, and the shame of feeling like we're doing neither one right. One question to carry: whose summer are you actually trying to have? 🤎🎧 Go deeper by listening to the full Gratitude & Compromise episode on Spotify (click here) or on Apple Podcast (click here)📲 Come say hi on Instagram: @adelethecoach
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  Replay #5: self-love and romantic love 15.07.2026 13mnt

  If you've ever quietly believed you need to become a fixed, better version of yourself before you're ready for real closeness, this episode is for you.We'll untangle self-love from the things it keeps getting mistaken for, like the spa day, or aspiring to be perfect. Then I'll hand you the tool I actually reach for on the days I've been unkind to myself: seven words, all starting with the same letter, small enough to keep somewhere you'll see them.I'll walk you through five simple moves for staying close to yourself and open to another person at the same time, how to notice what you need before you vanish into what they need, how to keep what's yours without turning it into a wall, and how to let being loved gently teach you to love yourself.You can still be figuring yourself out and be entirely worthy of love. Both. At once.Find a quiet few minutes for this Summer Heart Note. I'll meet you there.
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  Heart Note#5:the picture I didn't take 12.07.2026 14mnt

  It was my birthday week. Golden light, my hometown beach, my partner and my child beside me and when the phone came up, I found a reason to leave. Because that isn't the body I wanted back after the pregnancy, and I didn't want it standing there forever.I protected myself from the picture. And I lost the day.This Heart Note isn't a pep talk about loving your body. It's about the quiet trade so many of us make every summer without noticing and the surprising place it shows up next. The instinct that pulls you out of the photo is the same one that pulls you back from the person who loves you.In this episode:Why summer exposes something in adults that children never feelThe trade you think you're making and the one you're actually makingWhat "being seen" really means (and why we hear it far too small)The thing a newborn taught me about being loved with nothing to offerOne question to carry with you this weekIf you've ever deleted a photo of a happy day just because of how you looked in it — this one's for you.🎧 Wednesday's replay goes deeper: an extract of the self-love and romantic love episode, and what it means to feel at home in your own skin.Here is the full episode, if you are curious to listen to it Apple podcast link Spotify link
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  Replay #4: how to find your person 07.07.2026 17mnt

  Are you single and wondering if love will ever find you? Or are you dating and unsure if this is the right person? This episode is for anyone navigating the messy, confusing world of relationships and choice.I explore three powerful ideas that can transform how you approach dating: Know yourself first by understanding your patterns and what you actually need (not just what sounds good on paper). Observe, don't project—stop filling in the gaps with who you hope someone could become, and see who they actually are. And finally, let time do the work—character reveals itself slowly, and the right person doesn't need to feel like fireworks.Discover why settling from desperation never works, how to distinguish between intensity and ease, and why the best relationships often arrive in unexpected packages. Because choosing a partner is one of the most life-influencing decisions you'll make. Make it from clarity, not fear.A conversation about patience, self-knowledge, and recognizing love when it's quiet enough to feel like a deep breath.
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  Heart Note #4: Why everyone's on the dating apps in summer 05.07.2026 17mnt

  It starts with a quiet Sunday evening. The sun is still up, everyone else seems to be out living their best summer, and suddenly you are downloading the dating app you swore you deleted for good.In this Summer Heart Note, we look at what that ache may really be: the wish to feel wanted, the need for someone to share a sunset with, the discomfort of arriving alone to another barbecue, or simply the feeling that summer is happening somewhere else.This is not an episode telling you to stay off the apps. It is a gentler invitation to pause before you swipe, understand what you are actually looking for, and date without handing your worth to a stranger’s thumb.Bring a cold drink and an honest answer. This one may help you use the apps with a little more clarity — and a lot more self-respect. Get in touch on IG: adele_thecoachIf you are curious, the replay's episode for Wednesday is episode 9: how to recognise your person
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  Replay #3: why fight lingers? 01.07.2026 13mnt

  Most of us think the fight is the damage, but the real damage usually happens after, in the silence nobody teaches us how to handle.This week's Sunday Heart Note was about the careful quiet that shows up on holiday. So I'm bringing back one of my favourite episodes on a different silence entirely: the one that lands right after a row. 🤎In this extract of episode 11, we get into why you genuinely can't have a calm conversation three minutes later, the three things we all do instead i.e. rush it, go cold, or pretend nothing happened; and the difference between an apology and an actual repair.I also share one of the most vulnerable stories I've told on here: the months I picked fights about the bins when the real thing I couldn't say had nothing to do with the bins at all. 🤎If you've been arguing in circles and can't figure out why, this one's for you.🤎If you are curious to listen to the entire episode, here is the link If you want to share your thoughts, get in touch at @adele_thecoach on instagram
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  Heart Note #3: when the couple holiday isn't working 28.06.2026 11mnt

  A holiday is basically a relationship stress test in a sunhat. Take away the work, the routine, the separate friends, the rooms you can escape to; and it's just the two of us, sharing a bathroom, a bed, and every single decision about where to go and what to eat. That's exactly where the friction I'd been quietly avoiding for months had nowhere left to hide.In this Heart Note:I get into why couples end up arguing about a taxi that was never really about the taxi. I'll walk you through the four things that usually sit underneath a holiday row, why travel doesn't create the tension so much as expose it, and the one honest sentence that can soften a heavy silence at dinner without tipping into a fight. I also share a five-minute check-in you can use mid-trip, or at your own kitchen table on a Tuesday night.Here's what I want you to take away: whatever your trip reveals is information, not a verdict. A bumpy holiday doesn't mean you're wrong together. Usually it means there's something real here, real enough to be worth working on.Stay curious. Be brave. 🤎On Wednesday, the replay: Episode 11, how to recover, and actually grow, after an argument. Today was about the silence in the middle of a trip. Wednesday is about what happens when that silence finally breaks.
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  Replay #2: Are you where you want to be in love? 23.06.2026 9mnt

  Sunday's Heart Note left us with an idea: wedding-grief isn't a wound, it's a compass, pointing at something you still want. Today's replay picks up that needle and puts it on the table.This is the Episode 3 extract: are you where you want to be in love? We will try to explore the complex question: if nothing changed for a whole year, if twelve months from now your love life looked exactly like it does today, would you feel at peace? Or quietly unhappy?That gap, between where you are and where you thought you'd be, is what we sit with here. The moment their mood quietly becomes the owner of yours. The difference between a life season and a relationship pattern. And a few honest questions to take with you, including some just for you if you're single right now.Not to fix anything today. Just to notice it. 🤎Follow so the rest of the summer replays land in your feed.
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  Heart Note #2: The wedding invite that hit differently 20.06.2026 8mnt

  You can be genuinely happy for the groom and bride, and still go home feeling sad.Those two things co-exist at the same time when you are in a challenging spot in your love life.In this Summer Heart Note, we explore the quiet feeling that sometimes follows weddings, engagement announcements, and other people's love stories.We try to understand what that mixed-emotion might be trying to tell you.Be brave, stay curious and enjoy this episode of the LOVE INSIDE OUT's summer edition.Get in touch at adele_thecoach on instagram, I am curious to hear your thoughts!
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  Replay # 1: Juggling LOVE and LIFE 17.06.2026 14mnt

  What if the argument is not really about the dishes, the bins or the unanswered text?Sometimes the relationship is not the problem. Life is.Work pressure, exhaustion, children, ageing parents, money, commuting and the mental load can quietly change how we speak, listen and react to each other. A small comment lands badly. One person withdraws. The other pushes harder. Suddenly, you are arguing about something neither of you truly cares about.In this first Summer Replay, I share an extract from Episode 5 about what happens when everyday stress enters a relationship—and starts disguising itself as a relationship problem.You will explore why focusing only on the latest argument can keep you stuck, how to recognise your own stress signature, and why the thing that helps you reconnect may sometimes happen away from your partner.The episode also introduces simple ways to interrupt tension before it becomes a full argument, including decompression time, tips for difficult conversations and language that helps you name the pattern rather than fight over the surface issue.Because when life gets heavy, connection rarely needs to be perfect or impressive. Sometimes it simply needs to say: we are still choosing each other.Summer Replay No. 1 is an extract from Episode 5: How Life, Work and Juggling Impact Your Love Life—and What to Do About It.
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  Heart Note #1: the version of You that only appears on holiday 13.06.2026 7mnt

  Have you ever noticed that a different version of you seems to appear a few days into a holiday?Your body softens. You laugh more easily. You become more curious, more spontaneous and more open to the person beside you.Then you come home—and that version of you seems to disappear almost immediately.In this first Summer Heart Note, we explore what might really be changing when we step away from routine, pressure and the roles we carry every day.Is it the place, the rest, the warm light—or is something deeper happening?This short episode looks at the hidden difference between who we are on holiday and who we become in ordinary life. It also offers one question to carry with you through the week—especially if you have ever returned home feeling that you left an important part of yourself behind.Stay curious and be brave.
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  25. Sorry is a word. Change is a practice 07.06.2026 33mnt

  Six sorries in two minutes — and the argument only got worse.If you've ever said "sorry" just to make the discomfort stop… if you've ever been handed an apology that left you feeling more unseen, not less… if you're quietly waiting for an "I'm sorry" that never seems to arrive — this one is for you.Most of us were never taught how to apologise. Very few of us ever received a real apology from a parent while we were still children. So we grew up improvising — reaching for the word "sorry" like a button that ends the argument, instead of a bridge that repairs it.In this episode of Love Inside Out, Adele the Coach reframes apology from a confession of being bad into what it actually is: an adult life skill. Being aware of your mistake, and steady enough to repair it — without spinning, negotiating, or softening it to protect yourself. The people who are genuinely good at love are the ones who can do this cleanly. And it's learnable.This is the last full-length episode before the summer break — and it's the one everything this season has been quietly building towards.Inside, we cover:00:00 Understanding apologies: the journey begins00:22 The anatomy of a real apology01:44 Dismantling fake apologies05:21 Building a genuine apology10:05 The 5 components of a real apology14:57 Navigating reactions and moving forward16:43 The power of apology17:17 Waiting for an apology19:39 Understanding fake apologies21:49 The Importance of genuine change26:11 Personal growth through acceptance28:04 The gap between words and actions32:04 Reflections and challenges for growthThis week's Heart Work — the last of the season — is two reflections and one challenge: name the apology you owe and the one you're still waiting for, spot your favourite fake apology, and then give one real apology this week using the five components. Don't rush it. Don't soften it. See what happens.Whether you're partnered, dating, or single and noticing the same pattern show up wherever you go — this is a tool for life.A note on what's next: Love Inside Out shifts into Summer Heart Notes — short ~10-minute reflections every Sunday, plus the juiciest extract from a favourite episode each Wednesday. Full-length episodes return in September, with a new monthly listener Q&A.Stay in touchIf this episode lands for you, I'd love to hear about it.🤎 Instagram — @adele_thecoach
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  24. The slow fade: when someone leaves without ever saying goodbye 31.05.2026 31mnt

  I once had someone fade on me so gradually that I didn't see it happening. He dressed the distance up as a busy season — a big project, a phase, nothing to worry about. By the time I understood what was going on, I'd already mentally planned our second anniversary. Fifteen years later I can still feel it: the confusion, the hollow space, the not knowing whether something had ended or whether I was imagining the whole thing.That's where this episode lives. The replies that get slower. The plans that go vague. The partner who stops asking about your day and stops reaching for you when they pass in the kitchen. Someone turning the volume down on you, week by week, until one day you realise you can barely hear them — and nobody ever actually said goodbye.I take you through the different shapes it comes in — the dating fade, the situationship that quietly dissolves, the long relationship where one person has emotionally checked out but hasn't gone anywhere. I unpack why we vanish instead of saying the thing: the terror of being the villain, the magical hope that they'll somehow work it out for themselves, the way we've all gotten a little too good at avoidance. And I give you the actual words for an honest, gentle ending — because telling you to "just be direct" means nothing if I don't show you what direct actually sounds like.If you're the one being faded on right now — rereading the messages, measuring the gaps between replies, quietly deciding it must be your fault — there's a part of this episode I wrote just for you. When you reach it, stop whatever you're doing and listen. I mean that.And here is the one thing I want you to carry out of this with you: their silence describes them, not you.As always, we end with Heart Work — two short questions, one for you if you've been faded on, one for you if you're the one fading. 🤎CHAPTER BREAKDOWN00:00 — What the slow fade really looks like05:02 — When you're the one being faded on09:04 — Why we fade instead of saying the thing12:42 — Why being honest feels so dangerous20:18 — What a kind goodbye sounds like27:09 — Heart work and what's nextNext Sunday is the last full-length episode before summer — "Sorry Is a Word" — on apologies, repair, and the word almost none of us were ever taught how to use.