Widowed AF: Real stories of love, grief and beyond - With Rosie Moss

Afleveringen

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  Renata Scofield on Cancer, Sudden Loss and Raising Two Young Daughters Alone 27.07.2026 1u 16min

  For ten years, Renata Scofield and her husband Colin packed a lot of living into a short time. They met online despite living a block apart, married quickly, moved countries, built careers, welcomed two daughters and created a life together in Edinburgh.Then, in April 2023, Colin was diagnosed with kidney cancer that had already spread to his lungs.The treatment appeared to be working. Five days before he died, doctors told them the immunotherapy was shrinking lesions and things were looking positive. But what nobody realised was that the cancer had spread to his brain. A sudden stroke changed everything.In this episode, Renata shares the devastating reality of becoming widowed while raising two young girls aged just three and six, with no family nearby and no time to prepare. She talks about doing school drop-offs and pick-ups while her husband lay in hospital, making the decision to switch off life support, and the practical chaos that follows when the person holding your family together is suddenly gone.We also talk about Colin himself: a fourth-degree black belt in jiu-jitsu, a devoted hands-on dad, and the calm, steady presence who made everything feel possible.Along the way we discuss children’s grief, the importance of community, returning to work after loss, and why preparation is one of the greatest gifts we can leave the people we love, from wills and insurance to the passwords we never think to share.A conversation about love, resilience, solo parenting, and finding a way forward when life changes in an instant.
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  Widowed Far From Home | Nathalie Bruneau 20.07.2026 1u 34min

  What happens when the worst day of your life unfolds thousands of miles from home?This week I'm joined by Nathalie Bruneau, who moved from France to China for what was meant to be a short adventure. Instead, she fell in love with Leo, built a life in Shanghai, and together they had two young sons.Nathalie shares the extraordinary story of navigating marriage across cultures, the challenges alcohol brought to their relationship, and the difficult decision to separate while continuing to co-parent.Then, one Sunday morning, everything changed.After a phone call in a language she barely understood, Nathalie was taken to a police station and then a hospital, where she discovered she was there to identify Leo's body. Alone, in a foreign country, she suddenly found herself having to navigate grief, language barriers, unfamiliar traditions and the unimaginable task of telling her two little boys that their dad had died.We also explore Chinese mourning rituals, life after sudden loss, parenting through trauma, and how, somehow, we find the strength to keep going when we think we can't.This is a remarkable conversation about love, culture, addiction, resilience and the universal language of grief.If this episode resonates with you, please follow Widowed AF, leave a rating or review, and share it with someone who might need to hear it. Your support helps these conversations reach more people.
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  Funerals: Everything Nobody Tells You | With Poppy Mardell 13.07.2026 1u 11min

  Most of us don’t think about funerals until we’re forced to.And by then we’re expected to make some of the biggest decisions of our lives whilst barely able to think straight.This week Rosie is joined by funeral director Poppy Mardell, founder of Poppy’s Funerals, for one of the most practical, eye-opening conversations we’ve ever had on Widowed AF.Together they dismantle the myths surrounding death, funerals and grief, exploring why so many of us feel rushed, overwhelmed and completely unprepared when someone dies.They discuss why the funeral industry remains unregulated, why there often isn’t the urgency we’re led to believe, and how reclaiming time and choice can make an enormous difference to grieving families.Rosie and Poppy also talk about seeing the person who has died, whether children should attend funerals, the importance of ritual (whether you’re religious or not), and why wakes might be one of the most important parts of saying goodbye.They also look to the future of funerals, from direct cremation and natural burials to water cremation, human composting and what really happens to thousands of unclaimed ashes.Whether you’re recently bereaved, supporting someone who is, or simply want to feel less afraid of talking about death, this is an episode everyone should hear.In this episode:• How Poppy went from Sotheby’s to founding one of the UK’s most progressive funeral companies• Why the funeral industry is still unregulated — and why that matters• The myth that funerals have to happen quickly• Why seeing the body can help us “see to believe” — for adults and children alike• Practical ways to include children in funerals without overwhelming them• Creating meaningful farewells that genuinely reflect the person who has died• Why rituals matter, even if you have no faith• Direct cremation, natural burial, water cremation and human composting explained• What happens to unclaimed ashes — and why the law is finally changingAs always, if this episode resonated with you, please consider leaving a review or sharing it with someone who might need it. It really does help more grieving people find the podcast.
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  Holly Matthews: “Just Tell Them I Was Alright” | Brain Cancer, Anticipatory Grief & Parenting Through Loss 29.06.2026 1u 53min

  What happens when you have to grieve the person you love before they’ve even gone?This week I’m joined by Holly Matthews. Holly is a former actress, TEDx speaker, founder of The Happy Me Project, and was widowed at just 32 when her husband Ross died from grade four brain cancer, leaving her to raise their two young daughters alone.But before any of that, there was a Pimm’s promotional job, an instant connection, and a love story that moved at lightning speed. Holly and Ross built a relationship full of adventure, brutal honesty and the kind of laughter that makes two people feel like they’re speaking a language nobody else understands.Then came headaches. Anxiety. Focal seizures that were dismissed as panic attacks. Until one scan changed everything.Holly talks candidly about anticipatory grief, watching the person you love slowly disappear while they’re still alive, and the impossible conflict of desperately wanting more time while also wanting their suffering to end.We also discuss what good healthcare communication looks like, why Holly later stood in front of a room full of brain surgeons to tell them exactly where they were getting it wrong, and how a single compassionate doctor made all the difference.As always, we don’t shy away from the harder conversations. Holly shares what it was like preparing two little girls for the death of their dad, why she chose honesty over euphemisms, and the practical ways she’s helped them navigate grief ever since.This is a conversation about love, truth, parenting, neurodivergence, identity, and what it really means to live fully when you’ve learned just how fragile life is.In this episode we cover:• Falling in love almost instantly and trusting your instincts, even when everyone else thinks you’re making a mistake.• The symptoms that were repeatedly dismissed before Ross’s brain tumour was finally discovered.• Anticipatory grief and losing someone long before they physically die.• Hospice life, dark humour, and navigating the final weeks together.• Why the way doctors deliver devastating news matters so much.• Raising bereaved children with honesty, curiosity and space to ask every question.• Neurodivergence, masking and building a life that feels authentic after loss.
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  S4 - EP22 - How’s the Weather? Erin Clark on Grief, Love and Learning to Live Again 22.06.2026 1u

  What do you say when “How are you?” feels impossible to answer?This week I’m joined by Erin Clark, whose husband Greg died suddenly from a heart attack in 2021 after more than 30 years of marriage. One moment they were enjoying a simple family dinner with their children, and the next Erin found herself performing CPR on the man she’d loved since she was 19.In this deeply moving conversation, Erin shares the reality of losing her person overnight, the guilt she carried after falling asleep in a different room for the first time in three decades, and the crushing loneliness of learning to navigate a world that no longer made sense.We talk about the strange business of grief, the impossible task of telling your children their father has died, and why the second year can sometimes feel even harder than the first.Erin also shares the story behind How’s the Weather?, a simple but powerful question she created when she realised she no longer knew how to answer “How are you?”. Together we explore the idea that grief, like the weather, is constantly changing. Storms give way to sunshine, only for clouds to roll back in again.This is a conversation about enduring love, surviving the unsurvivable, and finding your way back to life one tiny step at a time.If you’re currently in the thick of grief, consider this your reminder that surviving today is enough.🎧 Trigger warning: This episode contains discussion of sudden death, CPR, grief, trauma and bereavement.
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  S4 - EP21 - Chatty Episode- The Life We Never Got to Have with Julie Farrin 19.06.2026 58min

  In this 'chatty' episode I’m joined once again by the wonderful Julie Farrin, who first appeared on Widowed AF to share the story of losing her husband Andy to glioblastoma just months after they were married.A year on from her first appearance, we’re talking about what happens after the immediate chaos of grief. After the funeral, after the paperwork, after everyone else has gone back to their lives. What does rebuilding actually look like?Julie opens up about losing not only her husband, but also the future they had planned together. We discuss the children they hoped to have, the difficult decisions that followed Andy’s diagnosis, and the complicated grief that comes with losing a life you thought was still ahead of you.We also talk about widowhood without children, redundancy, identity, therapy, dating apps, panic attacks, endometriosis, hysterectomy grief, body confidence, boudoir photoshoots, yoga, friendship and learning to put yourself first after years of caring for someone else.Along the way, we explore why so many widowed people struggle to find purpose after loss, the pressure society places on us to “move on”, and how rebuilding your life often starts with something much smaller: learning that you are worth getting out of bed for.It’s an honest, funny and deeply moving conversation about love, loss, womanhood, friendship and discovering that life isn’t over just because everything changed.Whether you’re newly bereaved, years down the line, or supporting someone through grief, I think you’ll find something in Julie’s story that resonates.As always, if this episode speaks to you, I’d love to hear from you.You can find me on Instagram at @widowed_af or visit the website at www.widowedaf.com.
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  S4- EP20 – Josh Was 33: Charlotte Jenkins on SADS, Survivor’s Guilt and Solo Parenting 15.06.2026 59min

  When Charlotte’s husband Josh died suddenly from SADS (Sudden Adult Death Syndrome), she was just 32 years old.One ordinary Monday morning, Josh went for a run, came home, started work and then, without warning, collapsed and died. Hours later, Charlotte found him at home while their two-year-old daughter waited downstairs.In this deeply moving episode, Charlotte shares the reality of navigating life just nine months after losing the love of her life. We talk about the trauma of finding Josh, the crushing guilt that followed, and the endless questions that come when someone young and healthy dies without explanation.Charlotte speaks candidly about raising a toddler who is beginning to ask questions about her dad, the fear of living with uncertainty after a sudden death, and the challenge of rebuilding a life that no longer resembles the one she planned.We also discuss EMDR, grief therapy, widowhood in your thirties, learning to parent alone, and why connecting with other widowed people can make all the difference.This is a conversation about devastating loss, but also about love, resilience and finding hope when life has been turned completely upside down.If you’ve ever wondered how someone survives the unimaginable, this episode is for you.
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  S4 - EP19 - He Was Planning Our Wedding: Josie Jakub on Suicide Loss, Love and Life After Olivier 08.06.2026 1u 15min

  In this episode of Widowed AF, Rosie is joined by Josie Jakub, CEO of Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide (SOBS).Josie shares the story of her fiancé Olivier, a kind, spiritual French lorry driver who was loved by everyone around him. Together they were building a life, planning their wedding and creating a future in rural France. Then, just weeks before they were due to marry, Olivier died by suicide.Josie talks openly about the mental health struggles that Olivier had hidden for years, the shocking way she received the news of his death, and the impossible task of making sense of a loss that seemed to come out of nowhere.She also shares one of the most extraordinary stories ever told on Widowed AF: her attempt to marry Olivier after his death through a little-known French law that allows posthumous marriage with presidential approval. What followed was a four-year journey involving handwritten letters, evidence of their love story and a dossier that eventually reached the desk of President Emmanuel Macron.Rosie and Josie discuss suicide bereavement, stigma, mental illness, survivor guilt, finding community through SOBS and the life-changing power of peer support.This is a conversation about grief, love, resilience and what happens when the future you planned disappears overnight.
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  S4- EP18 - “I Could Never Regret Loving Her” Danny Lesslie on Grief, Gratitude and Raising Their Girls Alone 01.06.2026 1u 10min

  In this episode Rosie Moss speaks with widower, writer, coach and devoted girl dad Danny Lesslie.Danny shares the extraordinary love story he built with his wife Rafaela, known to everyone who loved her as Raffi. They met on the bluffs of Santa Monica, fell hard, built a family together and chose each other every day. But when Raffi was diagnosed with a rare and aggressive squamous cell carcinoma at just 30 years old, everything changed.What followed was five years of treatment, uncertainty, heartbreak and anticipatory grief. As the cancer spread, Danny and Raffi faced not only the reality of her illness but a cascade of secondary losses including financial pressure, housing instability, job loss and the exhausting reality of navigating a healthcare system that often seemed unable to help.In this deeply moving conversation, Danny reflects on caring for Raffi through her illness, raising their daughters through grief, and the faith that carried them when every sense of control had disappeared. He shares the remarkable moments of provision that became known in their family as “Jesus moments”, the decision to be completely honest with their children throughout Raffi’s illness, and the legacy she left behind through her journals, which became the foundation of their book, Thank You, Cancer.This is a conversation about great love, devastating loss, family, faith, fatherhood and the complicated work of learning how to hold gratitude and grief in the same hand.A beautiful and profoundly honest episode about what it means to keep choosing life after the person you love most is gone.
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  S4 – EP17 – “I Thought I Was Broken”: Emma Grey on Late Diagnosis, Grief and Learning to Regulate 19.05.2026 1u 8min

  In this episode Rosie Moss is joined once again by Emma Grey. Emma is a former wills and probate lawyer turned grief-informed coach and counsellor, and founder of Rainbow Hunting.The conversation moves into the reality of long-term grief and the parts people don’t really talk about once the initial shock fades. Emma speaks openly about how bereavement can strip away the coping strategies and masking that once held everything together, leaving people overwhelmed, hypervigilant, emotionally shut down or simply exhausted from surviving.Together Rosie and Emma explore the overlap between grief and neurodivergence, late ADHD and autism diagnosis, rejection sensitivity, people pleasing, burnout, therapy, nervous system regulation and the strange process of rebuilding yourself after loss.They talk honestly about fear of abandonment, the pressure of solo parenting whilst dysregulated, and the tiny practical things that can help when life feels too loud: noise-cancelling headphones, retreating to bed, familiar TV shows, breathing exercises and learning that sometimes shutting down is not weakness, but protection.This is a raw, funny and deeply validating conversation about grief that doesn’t end neatly, the parts of ourselves we lose along the way, and the freedom that can come from finally understanding who you are underneath the survival mode.Including:• The story behind “Sadmin™” and why the paperwork after death can feel impossible• Why grief behaves more like trauma than a timeline• “You can become the best surfer in the world, but the waves still come”• Window of tolerance explained: hypervigilance, shutdown and nervous system overwhelm• Neurodivergence, masking and why grief often blows coping strategies apart• Rejection sensitivity, abandonment wounds and the fawn response• Why receiving help can feel harder than giving it• Therapy as self-discovery rather than “fixing” yourself• “Dormousing,” sensory regulation, noise-cancelling headphones and practical tools for overwhelm• Why so many widowed parents are surviving in burnout modeA thoughtful, funny, validating conversation for anyone navigating grief, neurodivergence, overwhelm, or simply trying to understand themselves a little better.
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  S4 – EP16 – “This One Was Different”: Donna Rice-Hannam on Hospital Failures, Grief and Surviving Without Mark 18.05.2026 58min

  In this episode Rosie Moss speaks with Donna Rice-Hannam, who found Widowed AF just five weeks after her husband Mark died suddenly in October 2024. What follows is a conversation full of heartbreak, fury, dark humour, and the kind of honesty that makes grief feel a little less lonely.Donna shares the story of meeting Mark through mutual friends, a “blind blind date,” and a pub-stairs snog that turned into a relationship built on safety, tenderness and fierce loyalty. After years of difficult relationships, mental health struggles and recovery, Donna found in Mark someone who didn’t just love her, but actively protected her wellbeing.Together they survived the devastating late-pregnancy loss of their daughter, privately named Charlotte but publicly known as “Pebbles.” Donna talks candidly about stillbirth, trauma, and the way grief bonded them even more deeply together. She describes Mark’s quiet acts of love, from packing the car and taking her to the sea during bipolar episodes, to proposing in Paris simply because “he just wanted to see you smile.”The conversation then turns to the terrifying weeks leading up to Mark’s death: repeated hospital admissions, catastrophic internal bleeding, blood transfusions, discharge decisions Donna felt deeply uneasy about, and the growing horror of realising something was being missed. Donna recounts the final hours in devastating detail, from the ambulance ride and failed attempts to stabilise him, to watching doctors perform CPR while begging him to come back.Rosie and Donna also talk about what happens afterwards: the rage of unanswered questions, delayed inquests, poor bereavement care, losing friendships alongside your partner, and the dangerous pull of alcohol when grief feels physically unbearable. Throughout it all, Donna speaks openly about bipolar disorder, surviving early widowhood, and the conscious decision to protect her mental health because Mark fought so hard to protect it while he was alive.This episode covers:• Falling in love after difficult relationships and finding safety in another person• Bipolar disorder, recovery, and supportive partnership without losing independence• Stillbirth, grief after baby loss, and naming their daughter Charlotte (“Pebbles”)• The role of humour, routine and practical care in long-term love• Hospital trauma, internal bleeding, repeated discharge attempts and advocating for loved ones• The shock of sudden death and witnessing resuscitation efforts firsthand• Anger, delayed accountability and ongoing inquest proceedings• Friendship, community and the people who quietly keep you alive in early grief• Alcohol, counselling, medication and surviving the “messy middle” of widowhood• Why protecting your mental health can become an act of love for the person you lost#widowedaf #widowhood #griefpodcast #griefsupport #bipolardisorder #pregnancyloss #stillbirth #nhs #medicaltrauma #inquest
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  S4 – EP15 – “I Don’t Know Where to Go for Comfort Now”: Corinne Longland-Malam on Sudden Loss, Trauma and Surviving After Lee 11.05.2026 1u 1min

  In this episode Rosie Moss speaks with Corinne Longland-Malam, known online as the “Fairy Grief Mother,” about losing her partner Lee after a rare and devastating illness turned their lives upside down in the space of months.Corinne shares the story of meeting Lee “very romantically on Facebook,” falling quickly into a relationship that felt less like fireworks and more like finally feeling safe. Together they built a blended family, a quiet life, and the kind of love rooted in contentment, companionship and being fully yourself with another person.Everything changed when Lee was diagnosed with cardiac amyloidosis caused by myeloma, a rare condition affecting both the heart and blood. What follows is a brutally honest conversation about sudden illness, complicated treatment decisions, and the impossible balance between hope and reality.Corinne speaks candidly about becoming Lee’s advocate while trying to protect their children, the trauma of repeated cardiac arrests at home, and the night he died beside her after another emergency. She describes performing CPR, waiting for the coroner, making impossible phone calls, and the surreal practical reality of grief in its earliest hours.Rosie and Corinne also talk about what comes afterwards: the secondary losses that ripple through blended families, being forced to leave the home they shared, parenting while grieving, and using TikTok as an outlet for pain that felt too raw to share anywhere else.This episode covers:• Falling in love after difficult past relationships and finding safety in another person• Cardiac amyloidosis and myeloma, including missed symptoms and delayed diagnosis  • The emotional impact of rare illness and navigating uncertainty around treatment• Advocacy, medical trauma, and protecting loved ones from frightening realities• Cardiac arrests at home, CPR, and the shock of sudden death• Parenting grieving children while trying to survive your own grief• Wills, legal planning, and the practical chaos that follows loss• Social media, community, and why sharing grief online can sometimes feel safer than doing it face to face• Rebuilding safety, identity and family life after losing your person
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  S4 – EP14 – “Katie’s Death, On Her Terms”: Jackie L. Disch on Love, Advocacy and Loss 04.05.2026 51min

  In this episode Rosie Moss speaks with Jackie L. Disch, who shares the story of her wife Katie and the life they built together over 23 years. A relationship rooted in deep acceptance.Katie’s death came suddenly in 2020 after a series of strokes, during a time when COVID restrictions meant hospitals were inaccessible, isolating, and frightening. What followed was a rapid shift from normal life into end-of-life care at home, as Jackie supported Katie through her final weeks.This is a conversation about presence. About what it means to stay when things are hard. About advocating for the person you love, even when every part of you wants a different outcome. Jackie speaks candidly about the decisions they made to prioritise comfort over intervention, and the complexity of holding both love and loss in the same space.There is honesty here about fear, anger, and the practical realities that come after death. But there is also something else running through it, a thread of dignity, connection, and what Jackie describes as “living grief” rather than moving on from it.This episode covers:• A long-term partnership built on acceptance and deep emotional safety• The impact of COVID on medical care and end-of-life choices• Katie’s strokes and the rapid progression to home hospice  • Caring for a partner at home, including communication loss and dependency• Advocacy, autonomy, and the idea of a “good death”• The emotional reality of early grief, including anger and administrative overwhelm• Lockdown, stillness, and being unable to avoid grief• Writing, memory, and learning to live alongside loss rather than resolve it
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  S4 – EP13 – “You’re Going to Die From This”: Orlagh Reynolds on MND, Parenting and Letting Go 27.04.2026 1u 12min

  In this episode I’m joined by Orlagh Reynolds, whose husband Fraser died from motor neurone disease.Their story starts the way so many of the best ones do. A chance meeting in Dublin, a bit of boldness, and a gut feeling that turned into a life. Together they built something full. Australia, travel, work, marriage, and their daughter, Una.And then another gut feeling. This one telling Orlagh they needed to go home to Ireland.Not long after, Fraser was diagnosed with MND.What follows is a conversation about what happens when you are told, in no uncertain terms, that the person you love is going to die, and there is nothing you can do to stop it. Oriagh talks about what the disease took from Fraser, slowly and relentlessly, and how they made a conscious decision to focus on what remained. Their home became a place of care, honesty, humour, and, perhaps most strikingly, gratitude. Not forced positivity, but a daily practice that carried them through the worst of it.We talk about parenting through terminal illness. How you explain something like this to a child. How you include them without overwhelming them. And what it looks like to raise a child in the middle of something most adults would struggle to survive.We talk about Fraser’s creativity in the face of unimaginable loss. The art he created using only his eyes. The legacy he built while his body failed him. And the letter he left behind for his wife and daughter, waiting until the moment it was needed.And we talk about what comes after. Solo parenting. The empty house at night. The decisions that are yours and yours alone. And the relentless reality of continuing on.This one is devastating in places. But it’s also full of love, strength, and a kind of perspective that stays with you.
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  S4 – EP12 – He Died on the Flight Home: Fran Milne on Sudden Loss, Grief and the Day Everything Changed 20.04.2026 1u 16min

  Rosie is joined by Fran Milne, whose husband Matt died suddenly after collapsing on a flight home from Singapore.What begins as a familiar story of work travel, school runs and family life shifts in an instant into something unthinkable. A knock at the door. A police officer standing on the driveway. And the kind of shock that splits your life into before and after.In this deeply honest conversation, Fran talks Rosie through the moment everything changed. From the surreal wait in her living room, to the phone call from the air ambulance, to the long drive to the hospital knowing something was very wrong. And then the moment no one can prepare you for.They talk about the practical and emotional chaos that follows sudden loss. Telling the children. The decisions you never thought you’d have to make. The strange, jarring details that stay with you. And the small moments of humanity that carry you through the worst day of your life.There is heartbreak here, but also warmth, humour, and the kind of clarity that only comes from living through it.This episode covers:Sudden death and medical traumaThe reality of a police knock at the doorDeep vein thrombosis and missed symptomsThe experience of hospital after a sudden lossTelling children their parent has diedEarly grief, shock, and survival
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  S4 – EP11 – “We Got Married Days Before He Died”: Jess Herrick on Young Widowhood, Cancer and the Life They Didn’t Get 13.04.2026 1u 9min

  Jess Herrick was 28 when her partner Max was diagnosed with a rare and aggressive cancer.What followed was a year of brutal treatment, long hospital stays, and a kind of life that no one in their twenties expects to be living. Against the odds, Max went into remission and they tried to rebuild. But just a year later, the cancer came back, this time terminal.In this episode, Jess talks about loving someone through illness, becoming a carer in your mid-twenties, and the quiet, devastating losses that come with young widowhood, not just the person, but the future you were meant to have together.They got married in a hospice just days before Max died.Jess also shares what it’s actually like to be widowed at 28, the messy reality of grief in your twenties, and why she’s now helping other young widows find each other through peer support.This one is raw, honest, and devastating, but also full of love.
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  S4 – EP10 – “You Are So Strong”: Leslie Harter-Berg on Sudden Loss, Solo Parenting and Starting Again 06.04.2026 1u 5min

  Rosie is joined by Leslie Harter-Berg, author of You Are So Strong, to talk about sudden loss, solo parenting, and rebuilding a life you never asked for.Leslie’s husband Ryan died unexpectedly in 2019 after suffering an aneurysm and stroke while they were on a family holiday. He was 34. They had two very young children. One moment they were by the pool, the next, everything had changed.They talk about the reality of those early days. Telling your children their dad has died. Coming home without him. The strange, relentless practicalities of grief. And why being told “you are so strong” can feel completely off the mark.They also talk about what comes next. Finding love again. Building a blended family. Raising children who grieve in very different ways. And holding both joy and devastation at the same time.Leslie shares how her book came to be, and how writing it felt less like revisiting trauma and more like spending time with Ryan again.About Leslie's BookTitle: You Are So Strong: On Grief and Letting Go of My Favourite Compliment Available: Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Target, Kindle, and Audible (narrated by Leslie herself)Where to Find LeslieInstagram: @lesliehartbergNonprofit: Vids for Wids (sharing widows' stories). ( https://www.vidsforwids.com/)Where to Find RosiePodcast: Widowed AFBook: Rosie's memoir (published on the anniversary of Ben's death)Content NoteThis episode discusses sudden bereavement, young widowhood, children's grief, and the death of a spouse. If you have been affected by any of the topics discussed, you can reach out to Rosie or Leslie directly via their social channels.
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  S4 - EP-9 - She Died Protecting Her Children: Stuart Green on Love, Loss and What Comes Next 30.03.2026 50min

  In this episode, Rosie Moss speaks with Stuart J Green, author of The Regenerative Leap, whose story of love, loss and survival is almost impossible to comprehend, and yet deeply human.Stuart takes us back to a life built in the Philippines, where he met his wife Maya, a brilliant lawyer, mother, and woman deeply committed to justice. Their love story is rich with humour, culture and connection. And then, in a moment of unimaginable violence, everything changes.Maya is murdered in broad daylight, ambushed in her car while picking up their children from school. What follows is a story that will stop you in your tracks. A mother’s final act of protection. Children who survive against all odds. And a father who must hold it all together while his world collapses.Together, Rosie and Stuart explore what happens next. The immediate aftermath. The fear. The decision to flee the country within days. And the reality of arriving back in the UK as a suddenly single parent to three traumatised children.They talk about:Survivor’s guilt and what it means to be “the one left behind”Raising children after extreme trauma and telling them the truth over timeThe anger children feel, and where it landsThe strange isolation of being a widowed parent, especially as a dadThe power of routine, even when everything feels impossibleAnd the idea that grief doesn’t just break you, it can also rebuild youStuart shares how he deliberately chose not to look back at his grief until his children were stable, and what happened when he finally opened those journals years later. From that came his book, and a framework for navigating life after devastation.At the heart of this conversation is a powerful reframe. Not resilience. Not “getting back to who you were”. But regeneration. The idea that after the fire, something new can grow.This is an episode about the worst thing happening… and what comes after.About raising children through grief.About love that protects, even in the final moment.And about finding a way forward when there is no map.If this episode resonates, sharing it or leaving a review helps other widows find it.https://www.regenerateleap.com/
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  S4 – EP8 Love, Vinyl and Bowel Cancer: Cath Holland on Caring for Andy and Life After the Music Stopped 17.03.2026 1u 13min

  In this episode Rosie Moss is joined by writer and lifelong music obsessive Cath Holland. Cath brings her husband Andy vividly to life, a thoughtful, principled “music buff” whose love of records, gigs and humour carried them through 25 years together and somehow held on right until the end.The conversation begins in the life before. Liverpool gig scenes, record shops, and a shared vinyl collection built over decades. Cath still laughs remembering the moment Andy first asked her out, by ringing her landline like it was 1987.Then comes the rupture. Cath walks Rosie through the brutal speed of Andy’s bowel cancer diagnosis. The failed prep. The endless hospital wait. Being told there was an “84% chance” of cancer just days before Christmas. Early reassurances quickly turned into the reality of stage four disease.Together they talk about the parts people rarely say out loud. Stomas, infections, DNAR conversations, and the relentlessness of becoming a carer while watching the person you love slip away. Cath also speaks about the strange intimacy of keeping someone at home after they die.From there the conversation moves into the long tail of grief. Funerals. Ashes sitting on a shelf surrounded by Beatles books. The support cliff that arrives after everyone goes home. And the exhausting work of rebuilding a future that was never meant to be yours.This is a conversation about love, music, caregiving, class, and the quiet endurance required to keep going when the soundtrack of your life suddenly stops.In this episode:• How Cath and Andy’s relationship was built through music, Liverpool gigs, record collecting and the rituals that still anchor her now.• The diagnostic timeline that still feels unreal: repeat endoscopies, a dread filled wait, and being told there was an “84% likelihood” of cancer days before Christmas.• Medical whiplash and systemic failure when tumours initially shrank but surgery was later ruled out because hospital teams weren’t communicating properly.• What “dying at home” can actually look like, from hospice at home support and syringe drivers to district nurses and the decision to stay out of hospital in the final week.• Small moments of joy when there is no bucket list, including record shopping, Saturday lunches and comfort music from The Beatles and Creedence.• After death: the funeral as a rare moment of collective support, a Beatles shrine for the ashes, and the quiet bubble before telling the world.• The secondary losses people rarely talk about including work, identity, grief brain and the physical impact of prolonged stress and caregiving.• The kind of support that actually helps bereaved people and the things well meaning friends often get wrong.A beautiful, honest conversation about music, love, caregiving and the long echo of loss.Chapters0:07 Welcome + Kath and Andy: a life built on music6:50 From first symptoms to diagnosis: the long, frightening wait9:54 Treatment twists: radiotherapy, chemo hope, then stage four12:44 Palliative care, hospice, and choosing home18:59 Living inside terminal illness: day-to-day love, fear, and admin26:07 The last weeks and days: care at home, music, and the moment of death37:04 What happens next: overnight at home, funeral, ashes, and keeping love close42:59 The fallout: isolation, practical help, money, class, and work after loss64:29 Rebuilding a life: identity, exhaustion, joy, and messages for the newly widowed#widowedaf #widowhood #griefpodcast #bereavement #hospicecare #palliativecare #cancerjourney #endoflifeplanning #griefandmoney #workingclassvoices
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  S4 – EP7 – Finding the Funny in Grief: Comedian Sam Morrison on Losing His Partner to COVID 19 09.03.2026 51min

  This week on Widowed AF, Rosie is joined by LA-based comedian Sam Morrison, whose life changed forever when his partner Jonathan died from Covid in 2021.Sam is currently in London performing his critically acclaimed show Sugar Daddy, a wildly funny, deeply personal comedy about love, loss and everything that comes after. What started as grief eventually found its way onto the stage, proving that sometimes you can’t make sense of tragedy… but you can make jokes about it.Rosie and Sam talk about meeting their partners, navigating loss at a young age, and the strange club nobody wants to join. They also get into dark humour, grief counselling, dating after loss, audience reactions to comedy about death, and why sometimes laughter is the only way through.Expect conversations about gay bear festivals, cruise ship comedy gigs, grief guilt, autoimmune diagnoses after trauma, and the awkward reality of trying to explain “my partner who died” in everyday conversation.It’s a thoughtful, funny and refreshingly honest chat about grief, resilience and carrying the people we love forward with us.Sam’s show Sugar Daddy is running at the Underbelly in Soho, London from 5 March to 4 April.Find tickets and tour dates at samuelhmorrison.com @samuelhmorrisonIf you enjoyed this episode, please follow, rate and review the podcast. It really helps other widowed people find us.You can also find Rosie on Instagram @widowedaf or at widowedaf.com.As always… take care of yourselves, and each other.0:02 Meet Sam Morrison + ‘Sugar Daddy’ arrives in London3:04 The love story: meeting Jonathan and falling in fast7:17 The rupture: losing Jonathan to COVID (and surviving the pandemic)9:57 Finding language, finding help: support networks + queer widowhood18:22 Building ‘Sugar Daddy’: turning grief into a show (and taking the hits)28:03 Grief in the body + love after loss35:37 Living with the long tail: time, milestones, sobriety, success-guilt41:41 Spirituality, signs, and the wish for one more conversation45:50 Final plugs + goodbye: dates, links, community#widowedaf #griefandloss #covidgrief #queergrief #griefhumor #darkhumor #bereavement #griefsupport #sugardaddyshow #standupcomedy