Sober Powered: The Neuroscience of Being Sober

Afleveringen

• 
  E329: What Dabbling Looked Like For Me 31.07.2026 12min

  Story time. In the last episode, I talked about the difference between dabbling in sobriety and actually committing to it. In the next episode, I’m going to talk more about what it looks like to stop dabbling and start doing the work. But before we get there, I want to tell you a story from when I was sober curious, because this is one of the clearest examples I have of thinking I was committed when I was actually dabbling so you can have an example of what I’m talking about in this dabbling series. Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: The best way to stay connected in between episodes https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  E328: Why Dabbling Keeps You Stuck in the Drinking Cycle 24.07.2026 17min

  Dabbling is when you stay close enough to sobriety to feel like you’re doing something, but not close enough for sobriety to actually change you. You listen to podcasts, follow sober accounts, make a Day 1 post. Maybe you go to a meeting. You lurk. You think about quitting. You say, “I know what I need to do.” You collect information, gather advice, and understand the problem intellectually. Then you disappear, or you get a little time and pull back, and you wait until things get bad again before you re-engage. We all go through a dabbling stage. Sometimes listening, reading, and observing are the first steps. But at some point, dabbling becomes a way to get the emotional relief of feeling like you’re working on the problem, without requiring the behavioral change that would actually move you forward. Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  Self-Care is NOT Temporarily Turning Off Your Brain (Replay) 17.07.2026 12min

  We think that turning off our brain with alcohol at the end of the day is “me time” and it’s the only way to get a break. This isn’t self-care, it’s called being depleted and trying to survive a life that drains you. Poor self-care is one of the most reliable predictors of relapse in people trying to get sober. It’s important and in this episode I’m explaining what self-care is and 5 simple ways you can begin to prioritize self-care in your life. Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  E327: The “Maybe It’ll Be Different This Time” Fantasy 10.07.2026 10min

  One of the sneakiest thoughts in sobriety is, “Maybe I could drink differently now.” This fantasy so convincing because it uses your progress as evidence. It says, “You’re not the same person anymore. You have more tools now. You wouldn’t let it get that bad again. You could probably have one drink on vacation, or at a wedding, or on a special occasion, and be fine.” However, you became more stable because alcohol was removed and you started building your life without it.  Your emotional capacity improved because you stopped using alcohol to avoid every uncomfortable feeling. So yes, you may be different now. But you are different because sobriety is working, not because you've magically become cured from taking some time off. Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  E326: Why Alcohol Looks Better in Your Memory Than It Was In Reality 03.07.2026 19min

  Romanticizing alcohol can be one of the most confusing parts of sobriety because logically, you know what alcohol did to you, but your brain still makes it sound appealing. When that happens, your brain usually isn’t remembering the full drinking experience — it’s remembering the relief, the state change, and the moment before the consequences showed up. That doesn’t mean you secretly want to ruin your life or that you don’t know better; it means your brain is retrieving an edited version of the story. When stress, boredom, loneliness, resentment, overwhelm, social pressure, or exhaustion show up, your brain may pull up alcohol as an old solution until you build more reliable ways to respond to those feelings. This episode is about why we romanticize drinking and how to prepare yourself for these thoughts so they don't trick you back into the cycle. Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  E325: When the courage to quit shows up, don’t assume it will still be there tomorrow 26.06.2026 16min

  A lot of people treat quitting drinking like it’s something they can start whenever they want. They think, “I’ll quit after this trip.” “I’ll quit after the summer.” “I’ll quit after my birthday.” “I’ll quit when work calms down.” “I’ll quit after the holidays.” “I’ll quit when I feel more ready.” or “I’ll try again tomorrow” On the surface, that sounds reasonable. It sounds like you’re making a plan. It sounds like you’re choosing a better time. It sounds like you’re saying, “Yes, I know this needs to change, but I’m going to wait until I can really focus on it.” But the problem is that readiness is not always available. Sometimes you get a rare moment where everything lines up in a way that lets you finally see the truth. Maybe you wake up with anxiety that feels different this time. Maybe you’re exhausted from disappointing yourself. Maybe you’re tired of making rules and breaking them. Maybe you’re tired of waking up and trying to piece together what happened. Maybe you’re tired of pretending it isn’t as bad as it feels. Maybe you have one of those moments where the denial drops just long enough for you to think, “I can’t keep doing this. Something has to change.” The mistake people make is assuming that moment will still be there tomorrow. Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  Running on Autopilot Mode (Replay) 19.06.2026 31min

  Regular drinking and early sobriety often feel like living on autopilot, where we are repeating the same routines without conscious awareness. Alcohol changes the brain to increase mindless activity, which can lead to rumination, excessive self-focus, anxiety, and addiction-related thought loops. In this episode, you’ll learn about how alcohol affects the brain and puts us on autopilot, how this keeps us stuck, and when this recovers in sobriety. Many people mistake life stress as the main source of overwhelm, but a lot of it actually comes from how alcohol disrupts brain function.  What to listen to next: E220: The Hippocampus and Alcohol: Blackouts, Memory Deficits, and Learned Associations E191: Going Back and Forth Makes Your Cravings Stronger E238: Why Moderation Doesn't Work Sober Support: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life ⁠https://www.soberpowered.com/membership⁠ Weekly emails on Fridays ⁠https://www.soberpowered.com/email⁠  Work with me: Sober coaching ⁠https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching⁠ Courses: The non-negotiable mindset ⁠https://www.soberpowered.com/mindset-course⁠ Sober milestones: what to expect when you quit drinking ⁠https://sobermilestones.supercast.com/⁠ Anger Management ⁠https://www.soberpowered.com/anger⁠ Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors. Learn more: ⁠https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors⁠ If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast. This is a one woman show!⁠ https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered⁠ Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  E324: Going to a Drinking Party 6 Years Sober: 5 Things I Noticed 11.06.2026 20min

  I went to a drinking party over the weekend with my in-laws. The family party was by the Jersey Shore, which is a 6 hour drive from my house. I’ve described these parties in the past as marathon drinking parties, because the drinking lasts so many hours. This one was 4 hours at a restaurant, then 4 hours at someone’s house. I think people assume that being sober around drunk people is always hard because you want what they have. They assume the challenge is temptation. Like you’re standing there staring at everyone’s wine glass thinking, “Poor me, I can’t have that.” But that was not my experience at all. I’m over 6 years sober, and being at this party did not make me want to drink or feel deprived. When you’re drinking, you are inside the experience, but when you’re sober and everyone else is drinking, you’re not inside that illusion. You’re watching what alcohol actually does. Because from the inside, alcohol can feel like connection, confidence, fun, freedom, and relief. From the outside, it can look like people getting louder, closer, less aware, more repetitive, more intrusive, and less connected to the actual person in front of them. So this episode is not about how to white-knuckle your way through a drinking event. It’s not about how to survive a party while secretly wishing you could drink. It’s about what happens when you’re far enough away from alcohol that you can see it without the fantasy.  Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  E323: Long Term Sobriety: One Tool to Use & One Trap to Look Out For 05.06.2026 14min

  Long-term sobriety can be a strange phase because from the outside, things might look pretty good. But internally, you might still have this feeling of, “Is this it?” And that can be really confusing because you did it. You made it past the constant cravings, the social anxiety, the awkward firsts, the nights where you had to white-knuckle your way through. So when you get a couple years in and you still feel restless, bored, unfulfilled, or like something is missing, it can make you start questioning the whole thing. You might think, “Maybe sobriety isn’t enough.” Or, “Maybe I did all this work and my life still feels kind of flat.” Or, “I thought I’d be happier by now.” And this is where people can get tripped up, because they interpret that dissatisfaction as a sobriety problem. They think the issue is that sobriety didn’t deliver enough. But that’s not usually what’s happening. Early sobriety is about protection. Middle sobriety is about understanding your patterns. But long-term sobriety is about expansion. It’s about asking, “Now that I’m not drinking, what am I actually building?” It’s about making sure the life you built is worth staying present for. Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  E322: Middle Sobriety: One Tool to Use & One Trap to Look Out For 29.05.2026 18min

  Middle sobriety can be a really confusing phase because you’re not in the chaos of early sobriety anymore, but you also may not feel the way you expected to feel by now. Maybe you start thinking, “Why am I still like this?” or “Why does everyone else seem so much happier than me?” or “if sobriety is supposed to make my life better, why do I still feel bad?” This is where a lot of people get discouraged because they think feeling better physically means they should be doing better emotionally. They think if the cravings are quieter, the hard part should be over. But that’s not really how this works. Early sobriety is mostly about not drinking. It’s about getting through the day, planning your time, avoiding obvious triggers, and creating enough structure that you don’t go back to alcohol. Middle sobriety is different. This is the stage where you start to see what alcohol was actually helping you avoid.  So if you’re somewhere between a few months and a couple years sober and you’re thinking, “Why am I still struggling?” this episode is going to help you understand that stage more clearly.  Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  E321: Early Sobriety: One Tool to Use & One Trap to Look Out For 22.05.2026 11min

  When you’re in early sobriety, it can feel like you’re overthinking everything. You’re thinking about what you’re going to drink, what you’re going to say, whether you should even go to something, how you’re going to get through the night, the weekend, the next event. It can feel excessive, like you’re putting way too much thought into situations that used to feel automatic. Your brain still sees alcohol as important. Your decision isn’t fully stabilized yet. So it’s trying to protect you by scanning ahead, predicting situations, and figuring out how to handle them before you get there. It’s not trying to make your life harder, it’s trying to keep you safe in a situation where things still feel uncertain. I know it can feel frustrating to have to think about sobriety so much and like this is going to be your life forever, but this phase is about learning how to use that thinking in a way that actually supports you instead of fighting against it. Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  E320: No Rock Bottom? Try This Instead 15.05.2026 23min

  Not everyone has a rock bottom moment and you can't control if and when it happens for you. In this episode, I share how you can make the decision final without waiting for it to be "that bad". Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  E319: Why “Not Right Now” Keeps You Stuck and “Forever” Sets You Free 08.05.2026 21min

  If you feel like you’re doing well for a while and then suddenly find yourself questioning whether you can drink again, this episode will help you understand why that keeps happening. We’re going to look at how “not right now” thinking keeps alcohol relevant in your brain and how that creates mental fatigue over time. I’ll also explain why the idea of “forever” feels so uncomfortable, but is actually what makes things easier. Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  The Geographical Cure: If Only X Would Change, Then I Wouldn’t Have to Drink So Much 01.05.2026 10min

  A short story about how I learned what "the work" is. Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  ADHD and Alcohol Use Disorder: Understanding the Link (Replay) 24.04.2026 16min

  There are a lot of people in the sober community getting adult ADHD diagnoses, so what’s going on here? There is a strong link between struggling with ADHD and developing a problem with alcohol because just like with anxiety, trauma, or depression, alcohol can be used to self-medicate the symptoms of ADHD. In this episode you’ll learn why alcohol and ADHD are linked, what is going on in the brain’s of people with ADHD, and how having ADHD makes it harder to stop drinking once you start. Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  E318: Why Your Commitment to Sobriety Keeps Disappearing 17.04.2026 17min

  Have you ever been completely sure you’re done drinking, and then a few hours or days later it suddenly doesn’t feel like a big deal anymore? That shift can feel confusing, even scary, like you’ve lost your commitment or changed your mind. In this episode, I’m breaking down what’s actually happening in your brain in those moments, why your thinking changes, and why it feels so real when it does. Once you understand this pattern, you’ll see why trying harder hasn’t worked, and what actually makes your commitment hold. What to listen to next: E283 Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  E317: One Reason Some People Stay Sober and Others Don’t 10.04.2026 23min

  A lot of people think they’re resilient because they’ve been through a lot. But if that were true, then why do the same situations keep hitting just as hard, or harder, every time? In this episode, I’m going to break down the difference between surviving something and actually becoming resilient, what’s happening in your brain when you cope by escaping, and why that pattern keeps people stuck in the back and forth with drinking. You’ll learn what actually needs to change so you don’t feel like you need relief from your life all the time. Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
• 
  E316: The Hidden Pattern Behind Productivity, Procrastination, and People Pleasing 03.04.2026 19min

  After getting sober many of us notice we go harder on scrolling, being productive, or people pleasing. In this episode, I want to walk you through how these behaviors are actually serving the same purpose, where they come from, what they’re doing in your brain, and why they can keep you feeling stuck even when it looks like you’re doing everything right. Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  E315: The “I’ll Deal With It Later” Trap 27.03.2026 16min

  There’s a very specific thought pattern that keeps people stuck with drinking for years. It sounds like: “I know I should probably stop… but it’s not that bad”, “I’ll deal with it later”, “It’ll click eventually.” And the tricky part is… those thoughts feel reasonable. There will always be a big enough stressor or a drinking event to justify delaying quitting. You’re still functioning. Nothing has completely fallen apart. You can still point to parts of your life that are going fine. So it doesn’t feel urgent. This is one of the hardest places to be because when things are obviously bad, the decision gets made for you. There’s a clear reason to change. But when things are just “okay”… your brain keeps you stuck in this middle ground where you’re uncomfortable enough to think about quitting, but not uncomfortable enough to actually do it. And that’s where people can stay for a really long time. Going back and forth. Thinking about it. Questioning it. Telling themselves they’ll deal with it later. This isn’t you taking your time or being thoughtful. This is a pattern. And the longer you stay in it, the more it reinforces itself. Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  E314: Why Emotions Turn Into “I’m Stuck,” “This Will Never Change,” or “I Can’t Handle This” 20.03.2026 23min

  We are experts at making our emotions much worse than they really are. You might feel stressed, and within a few seconds it becomes “I can’t handle this.” You feel overwhelmed, and suddenly it’s “this is too much.” You feel stuck or frustrated, and your mind goes to “this is never going to change.” In those moments, it doesn’t feel like a thought. It feels true. It’s not just that you’re feeling something uncomfortable. It’s that the feeling turns into a conclusion about your life. Stress turns into “I can’t handle this.” Frustration turns into “this will never change.” Discomfort turns into “I need this to stop.” Once that happens, it changes how you experience everything. It changes how you think, feel, and what you want to do next. So in this episode, we’re going to break down why that happens. Why emotions don’t just stay as emotions, why your brain turns them into meaning, and why that can make you feel trapped, overwhelmed, or hopeless, even when the situation itself hasn’t actually changed. Work with me: Community & Meetings: Living a Sober Powered Life https://www.soberpowered.com/membership Content only membership https://community.soberpowered.com/checkout/lessons Sober coaching https://www.soberpowered.com/sober-coaching Weekly email: You’ll hear from me every week-ish https://www.soberpowered.com/email Support the show: If you enjoyed this episode please consider buying me a coffee to support all the research and effort that goes into this podcast https://www.buymeacoffee.com/soberpowered Thank you for supporting this show by supporting my sponsors https://www.soberpowered.com/sponsors Sources are posted on my website Disclaimer: all of the information described in this podcast is my interpretation of the research combined with my opinion. This is not medical advice.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices