How To Love Yourself No Matter What

Afleveringen

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  323. Leaning Into the Messy Life — Why Deciding Life Is Supposed to Be Messy Will Save Your Happiness 30.07.2026 12min

  Life is messy. Yours, mine, everyone's. And somewhere along the way we decided that was the problem. Something to clean up before we're allowed to be happy.It's not.I'm Amanda Hess, certified life coach, and this episode is about a trap I watch women live in for years. The "I'll be happy when." When the house is calm. When the hard thing is over. When I finally have it together.The messy and the hard don't come in a separate box from the beautiful and the fulfilling. Same box. Same life. It's 50/50, and that's not proof you're failing. That's just how it works.So we stop waiting for the mess to clear. We lean in. And then we do the part that actually shifts things. We stop obsessing over what we're doing wrong and we start looking at what we want. Where we're going. Because that's the question that matters, and it's the one most of us never get to. We're too busy grading ourselves.Takeaways:The mess isn't blocking the good life. It's part of it. Stop waiting for a cleaner version that was never coming."Once I clean this up, then I'll thrive" is the trap. The hard and the beautiful come together. Same life, same day, both at once.Life is 50/50. When you stop reading the hard half as proof you're behind, you can finally be where you actually are.Drop the idea of "normal." Chasing it keeps you measuring your life against a standard that doesn't exist.The move that changes everything: stop obsessing over what you're doing wrong and start building what feels right. What do you want? Where are you going? That matters more.Links referenced in this episode:amandahess.ca/bookacall
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  322. Summer Shame: Why Sunshine Doesn't Always Equal Happiness 23.07.2026 20min

  Summer isn’t always the sun-soaked paradise we imagine it to be, and today, we’re diving headfirst into the sticky, sometimes cringe-worthy world of summertime shame. It’s a unique flavor of shame that creeps up on us when we’re basking in the sun, and trust me, I’ve seen it pop up in all sorts of unexpected places. Whether it’s about how we look in a swimsuit or feeling like we should be doing more with our sunny days, this episode is all about unpacking that baggage. Together, we’ll explore why this shame is so prevalent and how it can drive our behaviors in ways that leave us feeling less-than-stellar. So, grab your favorite fruity drink, kick back, and let’s chat about how to recognize, confront, and ultimately embrace our summer selves without the guilt trip!Takeaways:Summer isn't just about sunshine and good vibes; it can also bring out some serious shame that we need to tackle head-on.Understanding our shame during summer activities helps us reclaim our joy and embrace our bodies just as they are, flaws and all.Shame often hides in the dark corners of our minds, but by bringing it into the light, we can explore and process it effectively.Shifting our perspective on beauty standards allows us to redefine what we find beautiful about ourselves, moving away from societal pressure.Links referenced in this episode:amandahess.ca/bookacall
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  321. Why You Don't Have a Self-Love Problem, But a Shame Problem 16.07.2026 22min

  Here's this episode: I'm going after the thing nobody wants to name.Everyone tells you the problem is that you don't love yourself enough. It's not. The problem is shame. That's it. That's the whole thing. Shame is what shows up the second you're anything less than perfect, and every single human on the planet has it — but women get handed a bigger pile of it. We're taught to feel shame about our bodies, our parenting, our work, the way we take up space in a room.So no, I'm not going to tell you to love yourself harder. I'm going to ask you to look at the shame first.I get into where it actually shows up — standing at a party feeling like you don't belong, swallowing what you were about to say in a meeting because some part of you decided it wasn't worth hearing. I tell you about my own. Because you can't love your way past something you won't look at.Self-love isn't a place you arrive at. It's what happens when you stop running from your shame and get to know it instead. That's how you get your power back.Takeaways:Self-love isn't about lacking shame; it's about embracing and navigating through it effectively.Shame is a universal experience; we all feel it, but it's how we handle it that matters.We're socialized to feel shame, especially as women, which can sabotage our self-worth and happiness.True self-love is an active, ongoing process, not just a one-time affirmation in front of a mirror.Links referenced in this episode:amandahess.ca/bookacall
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  320. Take Back Your Life: The Case Against Responsibility Hoarding 09.07.2026 13min

  Are you a responsibility hoarder? Well, if you've ever felt like you’re carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders, this episode is right up your alley! We’re diving headfirst into the intriguing concept of responsibility hoarding, a term that packs a punch and might just hit a little too close to home for some of us. We chat about how many of us take on responsibilities that are way outside our control, often at the expense of our own well-being. And guess what? It’s not just about the big stuff; those little things we worry about can pile up like laundry after a Netflix binge! So, grab a comfy seat, maybe a snack (or a plant, if you’re feeling fancy), and let’s unravel the layers of what it means to hoard responsibility and how we can break free from the shackles of other people's expectations. Trust me, by the end, you’ll see that the only responsibility you really need to focus on is your own fabulous self! Ever found yourself in a pickle, feeling like you have to hold the universe on your shoulders? Welcome to the world of responsibility hoarding, where we take on the emotional weight of others, believing it’s our job to fix or manage their lives. In this engaging episode, we unpack the nuances of this behavior, diving deep into its roots and implications. Our conversation is peppered with real-life scenarios and a touch of humor, making the heavy topic of emotional responsibility feel a little lighter. We talk about the classic symptoms of responsibility hoarding, like being a people pleaser or feeling the need to control others’ emotional responses. Through a mix of thoughtful commentary and witty banter, we guide listeners to reflect on their own tendencies and consider the liberating truth that we are only responsible for ourselves. By the end, you’ll be equipped with insights that could revolutionize the way you approach relationships and self-care, all while having a few chuckles along the way!Takeaways:In this episode, we dive deep into the concept of responsibility hoarding and how it affects our mental well-being.Are you a responsibility hoarder? Spoiler alert: it’s more common than you think, and it’s time to let go!We explore the fine line between being responsible and taking on burdens that aren’t ours to bear, so grab your thinking cap!Funny enough, being a collector of responsibilities can bring joy, while hoarding them? Not so much, and we break it down.You can only control your actions, thoughts, and feelings—everyone else is off the hook, and that’s liberating, right?Join us as we uncover how to shift the focus back to self-love and responsibility for oneself, not others.Links referenced in this episode:show-notesapple-podcastsbook a discovery call: https://amandahess.ca/bookacall
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  319. Sometimes the Truth Doesn't Serve You 25.06.2026 14min

  Alright, folks! So today we’re diving headfirst into the wild world of self-criticism and the liberating idea that sometimes, the truth just doesn’t serve us. Picture this: you drop a glass and suddenly you’re the clumsy villain of your own story! But guess what? It’s time to flip the script! I’m here to chat with you about how our interpretations of our little blunders can spiral into a tsunami of self-loathing, and how we can break free from that cycle. We’ll unpack the notion that how we perceive our mess-ups—big or small—can shape our confidence and overall vibe in life. Trust me, realizing that life is messy and that we don’t need to play the blame game can be a total game-changer. So let’s kick that guilt to the curb and learn to be our own biggest cheerleaders instead! Ready? Let’s roll!Takeaways:Life is messy and embracing that messiness allows us to approach our emotions and experiences with more grace and understanding, instead of blame.Understanding that our perceptions of truth can often hinder our growth is vital for personal development and emotional resilience.Rather than focusing on whose fault it is when something goes wrong, we should ask ourselves how to move forward and what we can learn from the situation.Shame and guilt are unhelpful emotions that can prevent us from making progress; instead, we should learn to be kind to ourselves and focus on constructive actions.The narrative we create about ourselves in moments of failure can either propel us forward or hold us back, so we must choose our words carefully.We often believe that attributing blame leads to accountability, but in reality, it can create more negativity; let’s focus on solutions instead.Links referenced in this episode:amandahest.ca/bookacall
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  318. Navigating Family Drama Like a Pro: Patterns, Pleasing, and Perception! 18.06.2026 15min

  Alright, folks, let’s dive into some juicy family dynamics! Today, we're peeling back the layers on why family gatherings feel like stepping into a well-rehearsed play where everyone knows their lines—especially those cringe-worthy ones. The real kicker? It’s not about the events themselves; it's about the patterns we’ve been stuck in since we were knee-high to a grasshopper. We're talking about those age-old scripts we keep repeating, and trust me, they’re not as random as you think. Spoiler alert: it’s your nervous system playing tricks on you, making you time travel back to your childhood every time Uncle Bob brings up politics at the barbecue. So grab your favorite snack, settle in, and let’s explore how we can break those patterns without putting the blame on anyone else—because, really, who has the energy for that?Takeaways:Navigating family dynamics often unveils deep-rooted patterns that we unknowingly perpetuate, impacting our emotional well-being.The key to transforming how we interact with family involves reframing blame and focusing on personal accountability instead.Our nervous systems have been conditioned from childhood to react in predictable ways during family gatherings, leading to emotional time travel.Mastering the art of storytelling about our experiences can significantly alter our emotional responses and improve our overall happiness.Links referenced in this episode:amandahest.ca/bookacall
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  317. Accountability Or Self-Love — The hidden shame of motivation and accountability 11.06.2026 21min

  DO YOU EVER FEEL LIKE YOU SET A GOAL, PUSH HARD FOR A FEW DAYS—AND THEN FALL OFF AND WONDER WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?Like no matter how many times you try, you can't seem to make yourself do the things you say you want to do?If that's you, this episode is going to change how you see yourself.Because it's not that you're lazy. And it's not that you lack discipline.It's that the fuel you've been using to motivate yourself is actually working against you—and no one has ever shown you what to use instead.In this episode, I'm breaking down why accountability and motivation fail most people, what's really underneath the cycle of trying and quitting, and what it actually takes to build habits that stick long term.In This Episode, I Cover:Why motivation and accountability alone will never be enoughThe real reason you can push for a few days—but can't make it lastHow shame becomes the hidden fuel behind most "self-improvement" effortsWhy using self-hatred as motivation has a built-in breaking pointThe difference between forcing yourself and genuinely wanting to show upWhy love is a more powerful motivator than frustration, disappointment, or disgustHow to get specific about why you actually want what you wantWhy your brain resists new habits—and why that doesn't mean anything is wrong with youThe practical steps to remove barriers and make showing up easierHow to talk to yourself the night before so you actually follow throughThe toddler analogy that reframes everything about self-disciplineWhy a D-plus effort is still better than nothing—and how to own thatWhat regulated accountability actually looks like versus dysregulated forcingHow to flex when life gets in the way without quitting entirelyWhat changes when you stop using guilt and start using radical self-acceptanceKey TakeawayYou don't have a motivation problem. You have a fuel problem.Shame, guilt, and self-disgust can push you for a few days—but they will always break down. They are not a long-term solution.What actually works is getting specific about why you want what you want, removing the barriers between you and the action, and learning to redirect yourself with kindness instead of force.You don't need to be harder on yourself. You need to be more honest—and more loving.InvitationI'm running JuneTube all month inside the Love Yourself No Matter What community—weekly trainings, weekly lives, and everything you need to actually use these tools and create a different kind of summer.To get access, grab the free End Overthinking Five-Minute Reset Ritual at:👉 joinamanda.caYou'll get the audio training plus an invitation to everything happening in June.Ready to Go Deeper?If you want support implementing this work in your own life, you can book a discovery call with me.We'll talk about what's going on for you and whether coaching together would be a good fit.Book here: amandahess.ca/bookacallConnect With MeIf this episode resonated, I'd love to hear from you.Send me a message on Instagram: @theamandahessOr visit www.amandahess.ca to learn more about working together.Featured on the Show:Book a free consultation call with meSend me a DM over on InstagramHelp Other Women Find This PodcastIf this episode resonated with you, or you know someone who needs to hear it, please share.Leave me a review on Apple Podcasts and let me know what topics you would like to hear.Don't miss an episode, follow the podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or RSS.
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  316. What Happens When the Helper Can't Handle You (When Coaches & Therapists Shame You) 04.06.2026 14min

  What Happens When the Helper Can't Handle YouThere is a systemic failure happening in the helping industry — and nobody is talking about it.Coaches and therapists are opening emotional doors they are completely unprepared to sit in. And when you show up authentically — crying, angry, overwhelmed, resistant — instead of being held, you get shut down. Pathologized. Shamed into getting small.I'm recording this one hot, because it happened to me today. And I need you to hear it.What I cover in this episode:The $25,000 business mastermind where I was told they'd "move on" while I cried — and how it took me months to recover my confidenceBeing interrupted mid-share and told to mute myself and come back with a "more appropriate" shareBeing told by a business coach — twice — that I needed therapy, not coachingWhy this isn't a you problem — it's a capacity problem on their endWhy shutting down emotion doesn't protect the client — it retraumatizes themWhat trauma-aware support actually looks like in practiceClients who've been fired by therapists for being "too emotional" — and why that's an industry failure, not a client failureWhat it looks like when all of it is welcome: crying, anger, resistance, circling, even lying — none of it pathologizedThe truth I keep coming back to:Shame is the mechanism used to make you small. When someone in authority responds to your emotion with dismissal or redirection, the message that lands is: what you just did was wrong. And you shrink. You manage yourself. You stop showing up fully.That was never your shame to hold.You are allowed to show up as the fullest, most authentic version of yourself. There are helpers — coaches, therapists, friends, partners — who won't reject that. Your job is to find them.If this resonated:Book a free discovery call with me: amandahess.ca/bookacallConnect on Instagram: @theamandahess
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  How To Become The Woman You Secretly Want To Be 28.05.2026 22min

  Do you ever feel like there’s a version of you that wants more out of life…More joy.More confidence.More freedom.More YOU.But every time you try to move toward her, something pulls you back?In this episode, we’re talking about identity, possibility, and why becoming the woman you want to be has less to do with “fixing yourself” and more to do with what your brain believes is possible for you.I share a story from figure skating that completely shifted how I think about growth and identity, and why being around people who are already doing the things you want to do changes your brain faster than trying to force yourself to believe differently.We also talk about:Why sensitive women often stay stuck in old identitiesHow your environment shapes what feels possibleWhy your thoughts are not factsThe psychology behind seeing other people do what you want to doWhy your brain resists change (even when you WANT it)What Rick Rubin calls the “lazy brain”Why more possibility creates more freedomThe connection between anxiety, emotional heaviness, and purposeWhy you don’t need to “fix” yourself to create a different lifeHow coaching, support, and community help you expand your identityThe biggest takeaway from this episode:You are not as stuck as you think you are.Sometimes your brain just needs evidence that another way of living is possible.And when you start surrounding yourself with people, spaces, and conversations that expand what feels possible…you start becoming someone new without even realizing it.If this episode resonated and you want support applying this work in your own life, you can book a discovery call with me here:amandahess.ca/bookacallConnect with me on Instagram:@theamandahess
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  314. Silence Your Inner Critic: The Power of Quiet Time 21.05.2026 16min

  Today I’m talking about something I see constantly in women who are overwhelmed, emotionally reactive, anxious, or stuck in survival mode: the inability to slow down and be alone with themselves.So many of us are constantly doing. Working, parenting, helping everyone else, consuming self-help, listening to podcasts, journaling, trying to improve ourselves, trying to stay productive — and while none of those things are bad, eventually we lose our connection to ourselves.In this episode, I’m talking about:Why constant doing can keep us emotionally dysregulatedWhat emotional reactivity actually isHow fear of feeling keeps us stuck in fight, flight, freeze, and fawnWhy silence feels uncomfortable for so many womenThe importance of emotional safety and nervous system regulationHow to build the ability to feel emotions without becoming consumed by themSmall ways to slow down and reconnect with yourself throughout your dayThis episode is a reminder that healing is not always about doing more. Sometimes it’s about creating enough space to finally hear yourself again.Key TakeawaysEmotional reactivity isn’t just about outward behaviour — it’s when emotions are running your internal experience.Many women stay busy because being alone with themselves feels unsafe.Constant input and productivity can disconnect us from our bodies and nervous systems.Fear of emotion creates chronic fight, flight, freeze, and fawn responses.Emotional safety is something we can build over time.Small moments of silence and grounding matter more than you think.Healing is not about white-knuckling your way through life.Quotes From This Episode“All of your life is not a doing problem. It’s a being problem.”“The more emotionally safe you feel, the more able you are to allow emotion.”“If everything you do is designed to get rid of emotion, you’re going to live in fear.”“We live in a society that is perpetually inputting into us — and we never give ourselves space to release it.”“Silence is a skill. Being alone with yourself is a skill.”Call to ActionIf this episode resonated with you and you’re realizing how much of your life has been spent in survival mode, I’d love to support you.You can book a free discovery call at:👉 amandahess.ca/bookacallTogether, we can look at what’s keeping you emotionally stuck, how to create more emotional safety, and whether coaching is the right next step for you.
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  313. How to Build a Fuck Yes Life With a Sensitive Brain 14.05.2026 19min

  Let me tell you, if you’ve ever felt like you just can’t shake off a past hurt, you’re in for a treat. We’re diving into the fascinating world of trauma—what it really is and why it affects us all differently. I’m talking about the sneaky ways that emotional pain can manifest in our daily lives, from the tone of someone’s voice to the way silence can feel like a punch in the gut. It turns out that our brains are wired to keep us safe, but sometimes, they misinterpret signals and lead us down a rabbit hole of anxiety and fear. We’ll unpack why trying to simply ‘think’ your way out of it is like trying to use a spoon to dig a hole—it’s just not going to work! Instead, I’ll share some insights on how to work with your nervous system to create a sense of safety and stability in your life. Plus, I’ve got a brand new free class coming up that’s perfect for anyone feeling stuck in the cycle of overthinking. It’s time to learn how to prioritize your feelings without guilt and start living a ‘fuck yes’ life—one that’s truly yours!Takeaways:You might think you're overreacting, but your brain is just processing trauma differently than others.Replaying conversations is not a flaw; it’s your brain's way of trying to create safety after emotional pain.Feeling anxious or reactive isn't a logic issue; it's a feelings problem that needs to be addressed with care.It's crucial to realize that your needs are just as important as everyone else's, not optional.Suppressing emotions only makes things worse; you need to learn how to process feelings effectively.A 'fuck yes' life is about prioritizing your own desires and needs, not waiting for others to validate you.Links referenced in this episode:amandahest.ca/bookacall
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  312. You Don’t Need More Self-Improvement 07.05.2026 13min

  Alright friend, grab your gardening gloves because today we’re talking about something really important: how to create a life that actually blooms.The biggest takeaway from this episode?I think we spend way too much time pulling weeds and not nearly enough time planting flowers.You know how in spring we clean out our gardens? We pull out the dead stuff, clear the weeds, make space for something new. I really think we need to do the same thing mentally and emotionally too.So many women are walking around completely focused on what’s wrong. What’s wrong with them. What’s wrong with their relationship. Their body. Their job. Their life. And while yes — sometimes we absolutely do need to deal with the weeds — I don’t think healing is supposed to just be endless weeding.At some point, we also have to plant flowers.In this episode, I talk about:Why constantly “fixing yourself” can actually keep you stuckThe difference between pulling weeds and creating beautyNervous system regulation that actually feels supportive and doableWhy pleasure matters more than most women realizeHow kindness, rest, joy, and unconditional love change your lifeWhy so many women are burned out from trying to hold too many platesHow to start creating a life that feels full instead of just managedI also share why figure skating is one of the biggest nervous system regulators in my own life, and why the things that light you up emotionally are not frivolous — they’re necessary.This episode is really an invitation to stop living in constant maintenance mode and start intentionally creating a life you actually want to be inside of.Because the truth is:If all we ever do is pull weeds, we end up exhausted.But when we start planting flowers?Everything changes. 🌸Want to talk to me directly? Book a free discovery call here:amandahess.ca/bookacall
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  311. Why Mantras & Journaling Aren’t Working (And What To Do Instead) 30.04.2026 13min

  If you’ve been repeating affirmations, journaling your thoughts, and still feeling stuck… we need to talk.Because it’s not that you’re doing it wrong.It’s that these tools aren’t actually designed to create the kind of change you’re looking for.In this episode, I’m breaking down why mantras and journaling often don’t work—especially for sensitive, self-aware women—and what to do instead.Mantras can create internal conflict when your brain doesn’t believe what you’re saying.Journaling can turn into rumination that reinforces the exact patterns you’re trying to break.So if you’ve ever felt like:“I should be further along by now”“I know better, so why am I still stuck?”“I’ve done so much work, why hasn’t anything really changed?”This episode will land.I’m going to show you a different way to work with your brain—one that actually creates emotional buy-in, shifts your beliefs, and changes how you show up in your life.✨ In This Episode, I Talk About:Why mantras often feel empty (and can actually increase anxiety)How journaling can quietly reinforce negative thinking patternsThe role your survival brain is playing behind the scenesWhy your beliefs—not your thoughts—are what need to changeThe real skill that creates confidence, calm, and lasting changeHow asking better questions can completely shift your emotional state🔑 What I Want You To Take Away:You don’t need to force yourself to think positively.You need to learn how to question what you’re thinking in a way that actually opens something up.💭 Try This Instead:Next time you feel stuck, don’t reach for a mantra.Ask yourself:What if this isn’t actually true?What would be possible if I believed I was enough?How would I show up if I felt fully accepted?Let your brain answer. That’s where the shift happens.💬 Want Help With This?This is exactly the work I do with my clients.If you’re ready to stop spinning in your head and actually create change that feels real and sustainable, you can book a call with me:👉 amandahess.ca/bookacall📲 Come Say HiIf this episode resonated, DM me on Instagram or TikTok. I’d love to hear what landed for you.Links referenced in this episode:amandahessbookacalltheamandahess
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  310. Why You Feel “Too Emotional” (And Why You’re Not) 23.04.2026 16min

  If you’ve ever thought “why am I so emotional?” or felt like you’re just too sensitive for this world, this episode is going to shift everything.Because what if the problem isn’t your emotions…but what you’ve been taught to believe about them?In this episode, I’m breaking down the hidden conditioning that makes sensitive women feel weak, overwhelmed, or “too much”—and why that narrative is not only false, it’s keeping you stuck.We’ll talk about:Why being emotional has been framed as a flawHow society profits from you believing something is wrong with youThe real reason you feel overwhelmed, reactive, or “too much”Why trying to fix yourself is making things worseThe powerful shift from problem-focused → desire-led livingHow to start trusting your sensitivity instead of fighting itIf you’re a deeply feeling, intuitive woman who’s tired of trying to be less…this is your permission slip to stop.🎧 What You’ll Walk Away WithA completely new way to understand your emotional experienceRelief from the belief that you’re “too much” or brokenA starting point for working with your sensitivity instead of against itA powerful reframe that opens the door to more peace, energy, and self-trust💬 Ready to Go Deeper?If this episode hit home and you’re ready to stop overthinking, people-pleasing, and feeling stuck in your own emotions…Book a free discovery call with me:👉 https://amandahess.ca/book-a-callWe’ll talk about what’s going on for you and map out what real support could look like.🔁 Share This EpisodeKnow someone who feels like they’re “too emotional” or struggles with sensitivity?Send this to her. It might be exactly what she needs to hear.
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  309. How to Stop Feeling Like You’re Perpetually Dismissed 16.04.2026 10min

  To join Sensitive. Not Fragile - go to joinamanda.ca
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  308. Why You Can't Let Things Go (It's Not Your Fault) 09.04.2026 15min

  Do you ever feel like you just… can’t let things go?Like something happens and other people move on—but you’re still thinking about it days, weeks, or even years later?If that’s you, this episode is going to change how you see yourself.Because it’s not that you’re overreacting.And it’s not that you’re too sensitive.It’s that your brain and body are trying to process past hurt—and no one has ever shown you how.In this episode, I’m breaking down what trauma actually is (and why it’s not always what you think), how a sensitive brain stores and replays emotional pain, and why trying to “think your way out of it” will never work.In This Episode, I Cover:What trauma really is (and why it’s different for everyone)Why you don’t get to choose what your brain labels as traumaticHow past hurt shows up in everyday moments (conversations, tone, silence, looks)Why you replay conversations and overanalyze what you saidThe real reason you assume “I did something wrong”How your brain uses the past to try to create safety in the presentWhy this is NOT a logic problem—it’s a feelings problemWhy trying to change your thoughts first keeps you stuckWhat’s actually happening when you feel anxious, triggered, or reactiveWhy suppressing or “shrinking” your emotions makes everything worseThe cycle of overthinking → reacting → reinforcing fearWhy your brain is working exactly as it’s designed toThe truth about trauma: it doesn’t disappear—and it doesn’t need toWhy willpower, discipline, and “just calming down” don’t work long-termWhat it actually takes to stop looping and start feeling steadyKey TakeawayYou’re not holding onto things because you’re weak.You’re holding onto them because your brain is trying to protect you.This isn’t a logic problem—it’s a feelings problem.And until you learn how to process what you feel,your mind will keep trying to solve it… over and over again.You don’t need to think better.You need to learn how to work with your nervous system and your emotions.InvitationI’m teaching a brand new free class on April 16:Sensitive, Not FragileIf you’re done overthinking everything,replaying conversations,and feeling like you can’t fully relax in your life…I’m going to show you a completely different way to work with yourself.Inside this class, I’ll teach you how to:Stop the overthinking loopWork with your emotions instead of against themRegulate your nervous system in real timeFeel more steady, even when life feels hard👉 Register here: joinamanda.caConnect With MeIf this episode resonated, I’d love to hear from you.Send me a message on Instagram: @theamandahess
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  307. Sensitive Not Fragile 02.04.2026 19min

  If you’ve been told your whole life that you’re “too sensitive”…and somewhere along the way you started believing that meant you’re fragile…This episode is for you.Because sensitivity is not the problem.But not understanding how to work with it?That’s where things start to break.In this episode, I’m breaking down what sensitivity actually is (hint: it’s not just crying), why so many women feel like they’re one step away from falling apart, and what’s really going on beneath the anxiety, overthinking, and emotional overwhelm.In This Episode, I Cover:What sensitivity actually means (and why it’s so misunderstood)Why a “sensitive nervous system” doesn’t always look emotional on the outsideHow childhood conditioning teaches you that who you are is a problemWhy masking, performing, and shape-shifting become your defaultHow confidence decreases as life gets more complexWhy anxiety, second-guessing, and overwhelm start to increase over timeThe real reason you feel like you might “break”Why nothing has gone wrong — you’ve just never been taught how to work with yourselfThe difference between being sensitive and being fragileWhat actually creates stability, confidence, and emotional strengthKey TakeawayYou are not too sensitive.You are under-supported.Sensitivity without the right tools will feel like overwhelm.But sensitivity with support, self-trust, and nervous system regulation?That’s power.InvitationI’m hosting a brand new free class:Sensitive, Not FragileIf you’re done feeling like you’re one emotion away from falling apart,this is where you start.I’ll teach you how to:Feel your emotions without collapsingRegulate your nervous systemBuild real self-trustCreate a life that actually feels good👉 Register here: joinamanda.caConnect With MeIf this episode resonated, I’d love to hear from you.Send me a message on Instagram: @theamandahess
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  306. Deciding You Are Relevant - How To Stop Feeling Invisible In Your Life 26.03.2026 9min

  What if the reason you feel invisible… isn’t actually about other people?In this episode, I’m sharing something that came up in a coaching session — and it hit deeper than I expected.Because while most of us wouldn’t say “I feel irrelevant,” we feel it in subtle ways:When someone doesn’t listen to usWhen we don’t feel validatedWhen we feel overlooked in conversationsWhen our reactions feel bigger than the momentAnd what I realized is this:You only feel irrelevant when you treat yourself like you are.In this episode, I break down how this shows up, why it triggers such strong emotional reactions, and how to take your power back — without needing anyone else to change.In This Episode, I Cover:Why “feeling invisible” is more common than you thinkThe hidden belief underneath emotional reactionsHow quickly we internalize other people’s behaviorThe difference between external validation and internal relevanceWhy you don’t need permission to matterHow to stop fighting for relevance — and start owning itThe pattern that keeps repeating in relationships (and how to break it)Why reactivity keeps you stuck — and curiosity moves you forwardHow to get your needs met without escalating conflictKey TakeawayYou are not relevant because other people validate you.You are relevant because you decide you are.When you stop outsourcing your worth and start leading yourself from that place — everything changes:Your reactions.Your relationships.Your confidence.Connect With MeIf this episode resonated, I’d love to hear from you.Send me a message on Instagram: @theamandahessOr visit www.amandahess.ca to learn more about working together.
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  305. Feeling Overwhelmed? Plant Yourself in the Moment 19.03.2026 3min

  This episode is a little different.It’s actually a practice I shared with my private clients this week while I’m in Hawaii — and I wanted to bring it here because it’s something you can use in real time when you feel anxious, overwhelmed, or stuck in your head.This is about what I call planting yourself in the moment.So many of us live in our thoughts — spinning, analyzing, anticipating — and it pulls us out of our bodies and away from ourselves.This practice is a simple way to come back.It helps you move out of your mind and into your body using your senses, your breath, and a few grounding thoughts that remind you: you’re safe, nothing has gone wrong, and you can be with yourself here.The more you practice this, the easier it becomes to regulate your nervous system and support yourself through hard moments.In This Episode We Talk About• What it means to “plant yourself in the moment”• How to use your senses to ground yourself anywhere• A simple breathing pattern to calm your body• The role of safety-based thoughts in nervous system regulation• Why getting out of your head and into your body changes everything• How to be present with yourself even when you’re experiencing discomfortKey TakeawayYou can feel grounded and safe even in the middle of a difficult emotion.When you learn to bring yourself back into the present moment — instead of getting lost in your thoughts — your nervous system settles, your body softens, and you reconnect with yourself.Nothing has gone wrong.This is just a feeling.And you can be with yourself through it.Ready to Go Deeper?If this resonated and you want support applying this work in your own life, I’d love to help.You can book a discovery call with me and we’ll talk about what’s going on for you and whether coaching together is a good fit.Book here:amandahess.ca/bookacall
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  304. 50 Years in This Nervous System: 10 More Lessons for Sensitive Women (Boundaries, Resentment & Choosing Yourself) 12.03.2026 11min

  In episode 302, I shared the first 10 lessons I’ve learned from living 50 years with a sensitive nervous system.Today we’re continuing with the next 10.These lessons are about something I think many sensitive women struggle with: emotional adulthood.Many of us are technically adults, but we’re still letting the hurt version of us, the teenage version of us, or the people-pleasing version of us lead our lives. And when that happens, we end up exhausted, resentful, and disconnected from ourselves.Learning emotional responsibility changes everything.It means recognizing that your feelings are yours to care for. It means setting boundaries instead of quietly crossing them and then feeling resentful. It means advocating for yourself even when it’s uncomfortable.These are lessons I learned the hard way — through relationships, mistakes, and a lot of personal growth. My hope is that by sharing them with you, you might learn them a little more gently.If you’ve ever struggled with resentment, over-explaining yourself, feeling responsible for everyone else’s emotions, or performing in order to be accepted, this episode will help you see those patterns more clearly.And once you see them, you can start choosing something different.In This Episode We Talk About• Why other people are not responsible for your feelings• How resentment often means you’re crossing your own boundaries• Why over-explaining is usually fear of rejection• Why advocating for yourself might make people uncomfortable — and why that’s okay• How you can disappoint someone and still be a good person• Why being “low maintenance” is often conditioning, not a personality trait• The difference between being needed and being valued• Why you don’t need to be relevant — you need to be important to yourself• How to recognize when you’re performing instead of living• Why you will almost never regret choosing yourselfKey TakeawayEmotional adulthood begins the moment you stop trying to manage everyone else’s feelings and start taking responsibility for your own.When you learn to set boundaries, validate yourself, and choose what actually matters to you, your life becomes more peaceful, more powerful, and far more fulfilling.Choosing yourself isn’t selfish.It’s how you stop leaking your energy everywhere and start building a life that actually feels good to live.Ready to Go Deeper?If you want support implementing this work in your own life, you can book a discovery call with me.We’ll talk about what’s going on for you and whether coaching together would be a good fit.Book here:amandahess.ca/bookacall