Brave Love Great Sex – Couples Therapy Podcast

Episoder

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  Foreplay Replay - All The Feels – Sharing 5 Primary Emotions with Your Partner 20.07.2026 30min

  Let's talk about five primary emotions: joy, fear, anger, sadness, shame, and disgust – feeling all of them is important, especially with your partner. Emotions are the language of the body. They say, "pay attention, something's happening!" But so often we don't pay attention, choosing, consciously or unconsciously, to disconnect... We may have been raised in homes where anger was expressed in an unhealthy way, joy covered by a wet blanket, or shame used to control and manipulate our behavior. Regardless of how our childhoods taught us to relate to emotions, we can rewrite the script by creating healthy emotional attachments and responses. While there are many tools we can use to do that, in this episode we're going to talk about co-regulation and co-creation ("CoCo.") And learn how to share and navigate emotions together. If your loved one is excited, you match their excitement. If your loved one is angry, you honor their anger. Co-regulation is not co-dependency. Co-regulation does not say, "I feel happy only if you're happy." It says, "You feel happy, and I'm happy for you." Co-regulation allows the witness to be there for their partner while also honoring their own emotions. Most of the time, people don't understand the emotion they're in, and they need someone to support them in a curious and non-judgemental way. Co-creation allows partners to act as witnesses for each other. By asking questions and being present, the witness can help the emoter explore and deepen their understanding of their feelings. Listen to learn how to apply 'CoCo' to your relationship and create positive shifts in your emotional and sexual cycles!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  553: Reaching Withdrawers 17.07.2026 32min

  Welcome Brave Lovers! In today's episode we are discussing reaching withdrawers through the body.  When the withdrawer is anticipating something negative, they become activated, freeze and fall into a shame spiral. This shame spiral causes distance in the partnership and is a step in the negative cycle. Creating body awareness, and identifying what feelings are present can help withdrawers slow down and stay engaged. Listeners will learn how to do this today using the acronym ROC. R-elax, O-pen up, C-onnect. George guides the audience through, how to relax, opening up and getting curious, and connecting with others on your experience. This practice builds the skills of self-awareness, regulation and improved communication in relationships. How can you use ROC in your life? Let us know on our instagram @BraveLoveGreatSex and don't forget to pre-order a copy of our book by the same name! Check out Owen Marcus's organization Meld to find out more. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  Foreplay Replay - How to Stress Less to Avoid Sexless Holidays 13.07.2026 29min

  You grind so hard all year in hopes to spend quality time during the holiday season with your love but when the time comes you end up getting caught in the cycle. Has this ever happened to you? The holiday season brings out the extremes and primes relationships for the classic blame/attack cycle. Partners locked in tension often scream "you're too much/you're not enough" while putting on cheerful faces for family photoshoots and out of town visitors. We see the challenge and we've been there before! Join our hosts today as we open up a conversation on the many conflicts couples face during the holidays and how to stress less together. George and Laurie discuss the invisible workload and mental labor that goes into making holiday magic, the demands on time and energy and the cycles that couples get locked in. This episode will help each partner expand their perspectives and start a valuable dialogue of ways to support one another better, increase appreciation and create time to step under the mistletoe. We know that making memories isn't easy work and we want to prevent your relationship from taking the hard hits this year! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  552: On Shame and Belonging with Jef Slootsmaekers 10.07.2026 1t 5min

  Welcome Brave Lovers! In today's episode, Laurie is joined by EFT couples therapist Jef Slootmaekers. Jef is an EFT trainer hailing from Belgium and is the author of a new book on shame called Shame in Psychotherapy: The Art of Appearing (English translation coming in September 2026). He is also the coauthor of Fighting for Connection: Perspectives on Conflict and Intimate Partner Violence . This fantastic episode starts with the question "If shame had a voice, what would it want us to understand about being human?" and dives deep into our need to belong to each other, the ways we experience shame, its healthy functions and how toxic core shame is developed. All persons feel shame but our response to shame can either be adaptive or create negative stories that organize and influence our relationships with ourselves and others. Walk through this conversation with Laurie and Jef to learn the healthy functions of shame, why living in a world without shame would be like driving around New York City without traffic lights. Learn how to recognize unhealthy shame and ways to uncondition yourself from the rigid stories it has created. We all need to feel safe and belong and this conversation helps shine a light in the dark places we keep to ourselves but can also keep us stuck. This conversation brings a lightness and hope to what can be a heavy topic and you'll walk away with action steps on how to begin healing toxic shame. Take care Brave Lovers!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  Foreplay Replay - Theory of Love 06.07.2026 29min

  This episode is all about attachment theory. Attachment styles have been buzzing in the pop psychology world recently. Our hosts invite listeners to learn more about attachment theory which helps us understand why we fight the way we do and why our partner reacts to conflict in the way they do. Attachment theory is based on the idea that we are here to connect and life is all about relationship and meaningful connection. Join us today as we break down attachment theory, and the attachment styles secure, anxious, avoidant and disorganized. Laurie and George help us put on our attachment lenses to make sense of relationship behaviors that are often misunderstood. You'll take away the useful tips from acronyms A.R.E and O.I.L and how to make your relationship more secure today! Let's us help you love better this year! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  551: Bait and Switch 03.07.2026 32min

  Help! This is not the relationship I signed up for. Did you bait and switch me from the person I said "I do," too? Welcome Brave Lovers, in today's episode we are tackling a topic we have heard in our offices over and over again. Hot and heavy, emotionally connected lovers that become distant strangers after marriage, children and more life together. Listen in as Laurie and George, explain what exactly happens between partners and help us work together to get back to the love that brought you together initially. Listeners will be guided by the steps that withdrawers and pursuers can take to reinvest in the relationship. The opposite of the bait and switch isn't more sex, it's attunement to one another's different needs. How long has your caregiving system been shut off and you have only been focused on your needs that aren't getting met? It's time to break free from the negative cycle and see where you can take a step towards your partner. Make sure to order a copy of our book, Brave Love, Great Sex available for pre-order now! Check out this episode's sponsor (and help the pod!): Uberlube.com - Laurie's favorite personal lubricant! Use the code BraveLove at checkout! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  Foreplay Replay - Man Can't Come 29.06.2026 28min

  Laurie and George answer a mailbag question in this episode. "I think my husband has been faking orgasms...how can I bring this up without increasing the anxiety he may already be feeling?" We want to thank our brave listener for reaching out to us with this question and bringing up a topic that is rarely discussed. Our hosts help provide language for couples and also make more explicit the emotions that end up driving the 'faking behavior'. Learn how to start a difficult conversation with your partner and pay attention to these key takeaways from this episode: the compliment sandwich, reducing unhealthy shame, giving men the permission to not orgasm and taking some of the pressure off. We love helping listeners with questions like this, so make sure you visit our website and drop us a note! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  550: Better to Give or Receive? 26.06.2026 30min

  Welcome Brave Lovers! In today's episode we are diving into the topic of communal sexual strength. Research shows that couples feel more desire when they approach sex with love and caring. This creates a positive reinforcement loop for couples. The motive for sex is love and caretaking and secure partners experienced heightened intimacy, longing and connection. Love creates the sense of "we" and this benefit is noticed in other areas of the relationship as well. Laurie reminds listeners that "desire grows when we give pleasure, deepen intimacy with our partner and deepen our emotional connection. Follow along as Laurie and George give a great role play example of what this looks like in action. Make sure to grab a pre-order copy of our book, Brave Love, Great Sex!  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  Foreplay Replay - 5 Sexual Initiation Styles – Which Turns You On? 22.06.2026 30min

  How do you initiate in the bedroom? ;) George and Laurie explore (and joke!) about 5 different initiator styles: Seduction, Touch, Emotional Connection, Sex Talk and Power Play. Which way do you like it best? Which way does your partner like it best? Does seduction begin with the way you drink your coffee in the morning like it does with Laurie? Are you missing each other because of a style difference? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  549: Eroticising Power in the Bedroom 19.06.2026 31min

  Welcome Brave Lovers! In today's episode, we are exploring eroticising power in the bedroom. Listen in as Laurie and George discuss how different attachment styles may crave to be more submissive or more dominant during sex. We discuss that both roles may be freeing, relieving of responsibility and just sinking into pleasure. Avoidant partners may feel more close, connecting with vulnerability and more anxiously attached partners may feel reassured, certain and taken care of. This is not your average vanilla episode as we step into how to share these fantasies safely with your lover. Listeners will walk away with more understanding of underlying themes of power and control and safe and secure ways to communicate themes of submission and dominance. Remember to grab a copy of our book, Brave Love, Great Sex available for pre-order now. Pre-order Sale! Buy a copy of Brave Love, Great Sex from Barnes and Noble and receive 10% off! Between now and June 26th! Barnes and Noble Premium members get an additional 10% off! Check out this episode's sponsor (and help the pod!): Uberlube -- Laurie's long-time most recommended personal lubricant. Use the code BraveLove at checkout to get your discount! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  Foreplay Replay - Closing The Orgasm Gap 15.06.2026 29min

  Not fair. Women have less orgasms than men; Laurie and George talk about the disturbing stats. Why is this happening? Do men still not know how a woman gets aroused and reaches orgasm? Are we as parents and a culture teaching young women and men about what a female bodies might need? Women are socialized to give instead of to get. And men are more shaped to get what they need. George volunteers that women also need "fairplay" not just foreplay. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  548: The Dialogue of Desire 12.06.2026 29min

  Welcome Brave Lovers! In today's episode we are deep diving into what desire feels like on the body. You've heard us talk about using body cues in identifying the negative cycle but today we are focusing on physical pleasure. We are challenging listeners to expand their definition of "good sex" and focus more on the experience of desire, of pleasure and of sexual connection. What is your body feeling during all this? Listen in as we help put words to the experience of desire, gain more ways to describe to your partner how they make you feel and learn how this will help you to repeat desire fueled connection! Electric, warm, pulsating, pulling towards, openness, freedom; are just a sample of the words and phrases we discuss in this episode to help you capture what desire feels like on your body and how to share it with your partner. Our body cues can help us identify what is working and what we want to grow more of rather than just the negative experience. Send us your favorite words or phrases to describe desire on our instagram @BraveLoveGreatSex and make sure to pre-order a copy of our book by the same name today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  Foreplay Replay - 4 Ways Anxiety Kills Your Sex Life and How to Stop It! 08.06.2026 31min

  Do you have anxiety when it comes to your sex life? Maybe you identify with the sexual pursuer role in the relationship and find that you are the partner that keeps track of when and how often you have sex. This can create so much pressure for you and your partner! Join Laurie and George today as they discuss four ways anxiety is killing your sex life and the tools you need to fix it. George reminds us that anxiety can put us in yellow brain, meaning we cautious with our lovers because we are fearing rejection and loss of connection. If this is something that shows up in your relationship, this is a must listen episode. Download and share with your partner as an exercise to join with each other and face the anxiety together. Like what we're doing? Make sure to rate and review wherever you listen to our podcast and give us a follow on Instagram for more great info! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  547: How to Become Safe with Touch 05.06.2026 31min

  Welcome Brave Lovers! Today we are exploring the work of psychotherapist Ruth Cohn, and her research on the effects of childhood neglect. Join Laurie and George as they tackle the sensitive topic of childhood neglect on the adult intimate relationship. Our hosts share how not having physical or emotional connection at key times of struggle, creates an emptiness. We are often left without words to describe our experiences or comforting touch. They highlight the dilemma of healing and how getting connected in adult relationships can create fear. Often the thing we need is blocked because we sometimes don't know how to manage when we get what we need. Listeners will learn how to put words to these places, understand more about your needs and how therapies like sensate focus work. Take care with this episode and share your feedback on our socials @BraveLoveGreatSex Don't forget to pre-order a copy of our book today! Check out this episode's sponsor (and help the pod!): Uberlube.com -- Laurie's long-time favorite lubricant! Order some today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  546: Oral Sex For Him 29.05.2026 36min

  Welcome Brave Lovers! In today's episode, we are talking all about fellatio. This is a NSFW episode but very good for your relationship! Join Laurie and George today as they tackle this topic on the giving and receiving of oral sex. We are focused on the men in this episode and detail the importance of hygiene, grooming and reassurance. You'll learn how to have it be a more pleasurable experience for the giver and receiver. This erotic way to connect may bring up some discomfort but we encourage you to have this conversation with your partner and explore. Make sure to pre-order a copy of our book Brave Love, Great Sex now, available on September 15th! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  545: Joe & Myra Sitdown 22.05.2026 1t

  Welcome Brave Lovers! In today's episode, we are joined by a couple live in the studio! Join us as we welcome long-time friends of Dr. Laurie, Joe and Myra. They share with us their forty-year love story and the role that physical intimacy and emotional closeness have played in keeping their bond strong over the years. Joe and Myra talk about friendship being a foundation of love, how they navigated the difficult caretaking years, and keeping their attraction and desire alive. Turning towards each other, a strong belief they could weather the storms and even sharing vulnerabilities with each other to this day have created a strong and secure connection! Make sure to listen in and download this episode to hear from a real set of Brave Lovers! Order a copy of our book Brave Love, Great Sex coming out on September 15th. Available for pre-order now!  Please support this episode's sponsor (and help the pod!): Uberlube.com -- The lubricant Laurie has recommended for 20+ years! Use the code BraveLove for a discount! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  544: How Saying Thank You Can Improve Your Relationship 15.05.2026 31min

  In today's episode, we are talking to our Brave Lovers about the right way and wrong way to give thanks and appreciation to your partner. Saying 'thank you' has the opportunity to create closeness, connection and reinforce vulnerable expression. A casual, empty 'thank you' has the potential to disconnect, derail and seem like a dig. Join us today as we walk you through the differences between thank yous and how to meaningfully show your partner appreciation especially when they are open with you. Thank yous, grow thank yous when they are working and bountiful appreciation in a couple relationship helps you buffer external storms. George and Laurie's expert role play will guide you on getting 'thank yous' right in your relationship. Make sure to pre-order a copy of our book Brave Love, Great Sex for more on this! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  Foreplay Replay - Cracking the Nut - How to Breakthrough the Hard Shell Around Your Partner 11.05.2026 33min

  Are you tired of having the same fight over and over? Would you like to discuss things without triggering your partner. Can you imagine that underneath your partner's defense lies a hurt and even below that a need? George tries to help make it simple, in a nutshell there are three parts to how we react in a conflict - our protection, our hurt, and our need Together Laurie and George make sense of defensiveness and role play a different way to reach each other.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  543: Fighting the Cycle Together 08.05.2026 31min

  Welcome Brave Lovers! In this episode, we are tackling the negative cycle. Join Laurie and George as they discuss why just knowing your negative cycle is not enough. Couples that create lasting change unite together against the negative cycle. Listen in as we show you how to externalize the negative cycle to be something you can unite against. Partners that work to see the problem as something separate than the individuals have a better chance to express vulnerabilities. Vulnerability invites the partner into the solution rather than making them part of the problem. When couples work to solve problems together they create more security and relational safety. Make sure to rate and review this episode and share it with your partner! Fight that cycle together and be brave! Check out this episode's sponsor (and support the pod!): Uberlube.com -- Laurie's long time favorite personal lubricant! She keeps samples for clients to take in her offices! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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  542: Caregiving in Families 01.05.2026 31min

  In today's episode, we are discussing caregiving in families. Different approaches in parenting is a common place couples can experience disconnection and divide. Join George and Laurie as we invite you to explore what caregiving looks like for you and where those roots developed. Love must exist with limits and sometimes we can be in a tug of war; either being too hard or too soft. Where do you fall in the caregiving system? Can you tap into the emotional needs or do you need to tolerate the discomfort around setting limits? Listen in to learn more about how our attachment system responds to caregiving needs and how to get on the same page with your parenting partner. Let's lessen the divide and raise strong families! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices