Softly Unfiltered

Épisodes

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  Keep the Promises You Make to Yourself | Coach Zha on Pilates, Self-Trust & Discipline 29.07.2026 50min

  Softly Unfiltered is a podcast exploring Black womanhood, identity, relationships, healing, self-worth, friendship, career, and the unspoken experiences of modern Black women.In this episode, Blake and Ashlyn sit down with Coach Zha, Nike Well Collective trainer, certified Pilates instructor, marathoner, founder of The League, and creator of Black Girl Pilates Club.What starts as a conversation about Pilates quickly becomes something much deeper. We talk about honoring your commitments, showing up for yourself, building confidence through consistency, and creating a life rooted in joy instead of depletion.Coach Zha also shares how postpartum depression led her to movement, why representation in wellness matters, and how building community has transformed not only her life, but the lives of countless women.We discuss:• Why Coach Zha created Black Girl Pilates Club and how it evolved into The League• How postpartum depression changed her relationship with wellness and movement• Why Pilates is about so much more than fitness—it teaches breathwork, strength, and slowing down• Helping Black women dismantle the belief that showing up for themselves is selfish• The meaning behind "Honor Your Commitments" and how keeping promises to yourself builds confidence• Why consistency matters more than motivation when building lasting habits• How Coach Zha built an award-winning wellness community rooted in representation and sisterhood• Why elevating your life sometimes requires eliminating relationships that no longer align• Making the leap from corporate America to entrepreneurship• The difference between balance and harmony—and why harmony is the goalToday's Unfiltered Moment:"Nobody is coming to save you. The life you want is on the other side of you being courageous enough to chase it."Today's Soft Landing: Keep the promises you make to yourself.Coach Zha reminds us that confidence isn't something you wait to feel it's something you build every time you show up for yourself. Honor your commitments, give yourself grace, and remember that the life you're creating begins with the choices you make today.Follow Coach Zha:Instagram & TikTok: @coachzhaIf this episode resonated with you, let us know in the comments:What's one commitment you're ready to start honoring for yourself?📩 Email us: Softlyunfiltered@gmail.com📱 Follow us on all platforms: @softlyunfilteredpod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  Knowing When to Walk Away | Jobs, Friendships & Relationships 22.07.2026 37min

  Softly Unfiltered is a podcast exploring Black womanhood, identity, relationships, healing, self-worth, friendship, career, and the unspoken experiences of modern Black women.In this episode Blake and Ashlyn are talking about knowing when to leave. A job. A relationship. A friendship. And why so many of us stay way longer than we should, waiting for some dramatic event to justify the exit. The truth is, being slowly drained is a reason. Tired is a reason. And you do not need a disaster to justify choosing yourself.We got into:• Why we wait for a dramatic reason to leave when the slow drain is actually doing more damage• Being called selfish for finally choosing yourself and why people use that word whenever you stop being convenient• The guilt that comes with leaving when others still benefit from you staying, and why Black women carry that guilt harder• Why a boundary without a consequence is just a suggestion and what it means to actually put action behind your words• Forgiveness does not require reconciliation and how you can understand someone and still walk away• Why peace is the closure and how you do not need the other person to validate your decision• The harsh truth about what staying in the wrong situation is doing to your body and your face Soft Landing: You do not need a disaster to justify leaving. Sometimes leaving is an act of self-respect. Get out before you crash out.If this episode resonated drop a comment and tell us about a time you finally left something you should have left way sooner.📩 Email us: Softlyunfiltered@gmail.com📱 Follow us on all platforms: @softlyunfilteredpod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  Strong or Struggling? | Why Black Women Struggle Asking For Help 15.07.2026 29min

  In this episode Blake and Ashlyn are talking about something that a lot of women, and especially Black women, have a really hard time with. Asking for help. Why do we resist it so much? What does it actually cost us to always say we are fine? And what does it look like to finally let people in without losing ourselves in the process?We got into:• The difference between being genuinely strong and just being really good at hiding that you are struggling• Why the strong Black woman label is quietly costing us on the inside, physically and mentally• How never asking for help damages your closest relationships because people eventually stop offering• Why it matters who you ask and why not everyone deserves access to your vulnerability• Why receiving help is actually more vulnerable than asking for it because it means opening the door to be let down• Closed mouths do not get fed and why you cannot have a woe is me attitude if you never speak up• The soft landing that your worth was never tied to doing it all aloneSoft Landing: Asking for help isn't a sign that you're falling apart. It's a sign that you know your worth isn't tied to doing it all alone.If this episode resonated drop a comment and tell us about a time you finally asked for help and it changed everything.📩 Email us: Softlyunfiltered@gmail.com📱 Follow us on all platforms: @softlyunfilteredpod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  All I Need to Do Is Stay Black and Die | The Pressure to Make Everyone Else Comfortable 08.07.2026 31min

  In this episode Blake and Ashlyn are talking about something that every Black woman in a predominantly white space has felt but does not always have the language for. The invisible labor of performing palatability. The exhaustion of scanning every room. The pressure to shrink yourself, over-explain yourself, and apologize for taking up space. And the very real question of how you stay pro-Black while climbing in institutions that were not built for you. We got into:• Why as Black women our confidence is sometimes too big for the room and why that is never our problem to fix• Blake's experience at a hotel pool in Santa Monica where her group was the first to arrive and the last to be served• The invisible layers of walking into every space as a Black woman and why white people will never understand that specific tax• Emma Grede, corporate success, and the question of what parts of yourself you are expected to sacrifice to make it• How to stop apologizing, stop over-explaining, and stop tiptoeing at work when you are simply doing your job• The real question of how you stay pro-Black while climbing in institutions that do not look like you• The difference between adapting to survive and completely abandoning your identity as a Black person• Why we are the blueprint, the trendsetters, and why nothing is cool until we do it first Soft Landing: Stay true to your Blackness. Do not abandon yourself for acceptance. We are the blueprint and we are the trendsetters. Always remember that. If this episode resonated drop a comment and tell us about a time you had to decide between fitting in and staying true to yourself.📩 Email us: Softlyunfiltered@gmail.com📱 Follow us on all platforms: @softlyunfilteredpod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  What If Changing Direction Was the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You? 01.07.2026 33min

  Welcome to Season 3 of Softly Unfiltered. Formerly known as Suburban Black Girl Podcast, we're back with a new name, the same mission, and a season opener that felt only right. Because what better way to kick off a rebrand than by talking about what happens when life forces you to change direction?In this episode, Blake and Ashlyn unpack the pivots, redirections, fear, and even grief that come with letting go of the plan you thought your life was supposed to follow. Whether you're navigating a career change, ending a relationship, starting over, or simply realizing your life is taking a different path than you imagined, this conversation is for you.We got into:Why the thing you're most afraid to leave behind is often the thing you'll be most grateful you walked away fromThe difference between quitting and pivoting—and how to know which one you're actually doingHow Softly Unfiltered came to be and why we'd have continued these conversations under any nameWhy you can't take advice from people who haven't done what you're trying to do—and why your life is not a democracyThe one question to ask yourself before giving up: If this became easy tomorrow, would you still want it?How fear quietly keeps people stuck on paths they've already outgrownWhy worrying about what everyone thinks is one of the biggest things keeping women from pivotingReal listener stories about the pivots that changed everythingSoft Landing:Changing direction isn't losing yourself. Sometimes the life you're meant to live is waiting on the other side of the plan you had to let go of.If this episode resonated, we'd love to hear from you. Tell us about a pivot in your life that turned out to be a blessing in disguise.📧 Email us: SoftlyUnfilteredpod@gmail.com📲 Follow us on all platforms: @SoftlyUnfilteredpod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts and Spotify
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  Why Are Girls Low Key Weird? | The Truth About Female Friendships and Female Rivalry 24.06.2026 42min

  In this episode Blake and Ashlyn are getting into something every woman has experienced but rarely says out loud. Why do female friendships sometimes come with unspoken competition instead of pure support? Why does the energy shift the moment you start surpassing someone? They get into jealousy, passive aggression, social media as a hater detector, and what it actually means to protect your peace in friendships that have started to feel weird.We got into:• Why people clap for you as long as they feel like they're ahead of you and what happens the moment you surpass them• The difference between intent and impact and why understanding someone's insecurity doesn't excuse how they treat you• Why someone else's success can feel like a mirror reflecting what they haven't done yet• The exact moment a compliment starts to feel like a dig and why people pull away once you start glowing up• Blake's honest take on purposely posting accomplishments just to see who shows up and who stays quiet• Why social media has become the clearest sign of where you actually stand with people• The spiritual perspective on celebrating your friends' wins and why their blessing means yours is close too✨Mantra Moment: Not everyone who smiles with you is celebrating you. People can care about you and still feel threatened by your growth.If this episode resonated drop a comment and tell us about the time you felt the energy shift in a friendship after you started winning.📩 Email us: SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  You're Not Asking for Too Much, You're Just Done Settling | Standards vs. Settling 17.06.2026 34min

  In this episode Blake and Ashlyn are getting into something a lot of women have felt but couldn't always name. The difference between being fed up and being truly done. What settling actually looks like in real life, not the dramatic version but the quiet everyday version where you're pretending you're happy and dimming your light to keep the peace. And why you were never asking for too much. You were just finally asking the right questions.We got into:Why people stop benefiting from you when you stop playing small and why raising your standards exposes who was never enoughWhat the word done actually means when a woman says it and why disgust is the turning point that has no returnWhat settling looks like in real life including protecting him more than you protect yourselfWhy the rules of this world were not built with Black women in mind and why your timeline is yours aloneThe three table relationship concept and why Blake does not want to become enmeshed in a partnershipWhy shame in your relationship is already the answer and the reality TV test that tells you everythingWhat being done settling actually means and why it has nothing to do with giving up on loveMantra Moment: Being done settling doesn't mean you're giving all hope up of love. It means you're done ignoring your intuition.If this episode resonated drop a comment and let us know what being done settling looks like for you.📩 Email us: SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  She Has Everything But A Man | Why a Woman's Life Is Never Allowed to Just Be Enough on Its Own 10.06.2026 36min

  In this episode Blake and Ashlyn are talking about something that does not get said enough. Why is a woman's life never allowed to just be enough on its own? Why does a successful, accomplished, thriving single woman still get treated like she is missing something? And why is it always a man that is supposed to complete the picture? They get into the double standards, the societal pressure, the dating dynamics that come with being a high value woman, and what it actually looks like to build a full life without making love the missing piece.We got into:• Why successful single women are seen as incomplete while successful single men are called a catch• How being a high value woman makes dating harder and why men resent the same qualities they were drawn to• Why Blake said she refuses to be a single mother in a marriage and what that actually means• The woman who has everything she ever dreamed of and is still considered less valuable without a man• What Blake would do if she had a letter from God confirming her person was on the way• Why Ashlyn says stop waiting on a man to make big life decisions and build your accomplishments now• Blake's honest take on not wanting a merged life and what parallel tables actually look like in a relationshipIf this episode resonated drop a comment and let us know if you have ever felt like your life was not being taken seriously because you were single📩 Email us: SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  You Can Be Confident and Still Have Low Self-Worth | Why We Accept Less Than We Deserve 03.06.2026 32min

  In this episode Blake and Ashlyn are breaking down something that a lot of high achieving women have felt but could never fully name. You can be the most confident, accomplished, successful woman in the room and still not believe you deserve the things you have built. That is the difference between self-esteem and self-worth. And in this episode they get deeply personal about where that gap comes from and what closing it actually looks like.We got into:• The real difference between self-esteem and self-worth and why you can have one without the other• Why high achieving women often have the highest self-esteem and the lowest self-worth at the same time• How achieving becomes the substitute for worth and what happens when the wins stop coming• Blake asking herself what a less qualified white man would ask for in a salary negotiation and doing it anyway• How toxic relationships and corporate environments both slowly rewrite how you see yourself• Ashlyn opening up about a toxic relationship that took years to recover from and the stool that got moved• Why your blessings are sometimes blocked by the dead weight you haven't let go of yet• The mantra Blake gave herself in January that reframed everythingMantra Moment: I am worthy not because of what I do but because of who I am. The work is closing that gap.If this resonated drop a comment and let us know if you have ever realized you were confident on the outside but still accepting less than you deserved.📩 Email us: SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  The Dating Insecurities You Have When You Grew Up Invisible | Black Girl Dating Experience 27.05.2026 35min

  In this episode Blake and Ashlyn are getting into something deeply personal and rarely talked about. The dating insecurities that come from growing up invisible. They talk about what happens when you grow up as a Black girl in predominantly white spaces, how not feeling chosen early on shapes your confidence, your standards, and your entire approach to love and dating as an adult.We got into:• How growing up without early romantic attention creates patterns you carry into adult dating• Why Blake and Ashlyn both overperformed to earn love instead of knowing they were worthy just for existing• Why dating is not encouraged for Black girls the way it is for their white counterparts and how that gap shows up later• The painful experience of having parents who called you beautiful but a world outside that invalidated it• Being dared to be asked out as a joke and not even knowing it at the time• Why comparison is the biggest thief and how to protect your timeline when everyone around you seems ahead• What Blake and Ashlyn would tell their younger selves and the message they want every invisible girl to hearMantra Moment: Growing up invisible doesn't mean you were unworthy. It means the environment didn't reflect your value back to you.If this episode resonated drop a comment and tell us one thing you wish someone had told you when you were growing up and feeling unseen.📩 Email us: SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  Dating the Potential Rich Man | When Believing in Someone Becomes Emotional Labor 20.05.2026 36min

  In this episode we are getting into something that a lot of women have experienced but not always been able to name. Dating the potential rich man. What happens when you believe in someone so much that you start abandoning your own timeline to help them stay on track with theirs? When does patience become emotional labor? And at what point do you have to look yourself in the eye and say this potential is not actualizing?We got into:• Why women stay too long in relationships with potential and how it becomes self abandonment without you even realizing it• The difference between supporting someone and actually carrying them• When consistency is the real measure of progress and what stalled ambition actually looks like• Why society praises women for staying through cheating and hardship but shames them for walking away• The moment you realize you thought you were showing grace but you were abandoning your own needs• Why the keep a man conversation is never directed at men and what that man is doing to keep you• What a healthy dynamic actually looks like when both people are contributing and building togetherMantra Moment: Potential is not a promise. Consistency is. Real partnership is built on patterns and not projections.If this resonated drop a comment and let us know if you have ever realized you were investing in someone's future more than they were investing in their own present.📩 Email us: SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  Confidence, Self Obsession, and Breaking Out of Survival Mode Feat. Erica Ware The Confidence Coach 13.05.2026 53min

  In this episode we sat down with Erica, The Confidence Coach (@theconfidencecoach), for a conversation that had us taking notes from start to finish. Erica is a mindset coach dedicated to helping women build self worth, set boundaries, and show up as their most confident selves. And she did not hold back.We got into:• The difference between being loved and being needed and why real love feels like exhale energy• Why calling yourself low maintenance is actually inviting low effort love• How to stop giving up your autonomy just because you like somebody• Why Black women feel so guilty for choosing themselves and where that guilt actually comes from• What survival mode actually looks like and how to recognize it in your own life• What healthy self obsession really means and why it doesn't have to be healthy• How to build and protect your routine in a relationship so you don't lose yourself• The difference between guilt and discomfort when you say no• Why confidence is curated daily and not something you wake up withMantra Moment: Do it uncertain. Do it scared. Do it imperfect. There is no such thing as the right time. The right time is right now. — Erica (@theconfidencecoach)If this episode resonated drop a comment and let us know which part of Erica's message hit home for you.📩 Email us: SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  Why We'll Spend $500 on Beauty But Feel Guilty About Everything Else 06.05.2026 37min

  In this episode Blake and Ashlyn are getting into something every woman can relate to but Black women feel on a whole other level. Why do we spend $500 on beauty without blinking but feel guilty spending money on anything else? From hair as mental health to corporate America's beauty expectations, to the moment you realize marketing has been manipulating you the whole time, this one hits.We got into:• Why beauty spending feels like a necessity and not a luxury for Black women• How our hair and appearance directly affect our mental health and confidence• Navigating corporate spaces as a Black woman and why keeping your hair done is armor• The coworker who asks if everything is okay the moment your hair isn't laid• The unsolicited natural hair compliments and why we are over the small talk• Whether beauty spending is about results or peace of mind• How working in beauty and marketing changes the way you shop forever• At what point beauty maintenance shifts from enjoyment to full obligation• The tension between not wanting to dress up for a man and realizing you have to be what you want to attractIf this episode resonated, drop a comment and let us know what beauty expense you refuse to feel guilty about.📩 Email us: SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  The Money Talk Nobody Wants to Have About Dating | Standards, Finances and Compatibility 29.04.2026 36min

  In this episode we are getting into the money talk nobody actually wants to have about dating. We are talking about financial expectations, effort and intention, and whether the real issue is men being under prepared or women raising their standards as they level up. We also get into the transactional nature of all relationships, why equally yoked has to mean more than just financially, and whether high standards are really entitlement or just incompatibility.We got into:• Whether dating standards have actually increased or women are just finally being honest• The question every financially independent woman is asking: can you do for me what I do for myself?• Why relationships are transactional and why pretending they aren't is how you end up pouring into the wrong person• The TikTok story about the non-refundable flight, the nails, and why people got it wrong• Why money on a dinner date is the easiest flex and not a real measure of compatibility• The gap between how women show up for their friends versus how men show up in relationships• Whether men are financially inadequate or just resistant to showing up for women they don't value✨Mantra Moment: Standards are not a price tag. They are a reflection of values.If this resonated, drop a comment and let us know if you've ever realized you weren't asking for too much, you were just asking the wrong person.📩 Email us: ⁠SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com⁠📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  Building a Personal Brand as a Black Woman Feat. Asya (@conqueringasya) | Beauty, Softness & Success 22.04.2026 50min

  In this episode, we sat down with Asya, content creator and founder behind @conqueringasya, to talk about what it really looks like to build a platform as a Black woman in beauty and lifestyle. From navigating double standards with brand deals to unlearning the strong Black woman role in her relationship, Asya kept it real from start to finish.We got into:• How Asya started creating content in 2017 with a JC Penney credit card and Fenty Beauty• Navigating beauty standards and double standards in brand partnerships as a Black woman• Why code switching followed her from corporate America into content creation• What it took to unlearn being the strong one and let her partner lead• Living with PCOS and showing up on camera authentically anyway• The friendship losses that came with leveling up and leaving certain chapters behind• Why she shares on her own terms and how she protects her peace online• What she tells anyone who wants to pursue content creation full timeMantra Moment: "Conquer life's adversities that come at you. Don't crumble underneath the pressure." — Asya (@conqueringasya)If this episode resonated, drop a comment and let us know which part of Aysa's story hit home for you.📩 Email us: ⁠SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com⁠📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  Is Success Supposed to Feel This Anticlimactic? | Ambition, Burnout and Finding Fulfillment 15.04.2026 30min

  In this episode, Blake and Ashlyn get real about something nobody talks about enough.What happens when you actually get what you worked for and it just feels... flat.We talk about the anticlimactic feeling that comes after achieving a goal, why the chase can feel better than the arrival, and how we have both struggled to sit in wins without immediately moving the goalpost.We got into:• Why reaching a milestone can feel like a crash instead of a celebration• The difference between gratitude and complacency and why we confuse them• How success can become a way of avoiding healing• External validation versus internal fulfillment and which one actually lasts• Burnout, being overworked, and what capable does not mean willing really looks like• What the younger version of you would think looking at where you are now• How to actually celebrate yourself before you move on to the next thingMantra Moment: "Achieving a goal doesn't automatically create meaning or wholeness. Fulfillment often comes from how we live between milestones, not from the milestones themselves. Success is a moment, not an identity."If this episode resonated, drop a comment and let us know if you've ever felt this way after reaching a big goal.📩 Email us: SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  Becoming a Pretty Wealthy Woman ft. Caitlyn Kumi | Personal Branding, Dating and Corporate Life 08.04.2026 59min

  In this episode, we sat down with Caitlyn Kumi, Forbes 30 Under 30 honoree, founder of Miss Empower Her, and content creator, to talk about building a career, a personal brand, and a full life as an ambitious Black woman. We got into: • Why protecting your peace can sometimes mean you stop seeing red flags • The kind of corporate feedback Black women know all too well • Why your personal brand can carry more weight than your resume • Dating as a successful Black woman and the mindset shift that actually helps • Her take on true balance and why something always has to fall • Pattern recognition in adult friendships and how to trust what you see • The three things every woman should be investing in right now • What it really means to become a pretty wealthy woman Mantra Moment: "People remember how you make them feel." Maya Angelou, shared by Caitlyn Kumi If this episode resonated, drop a comment and let us know which part hit hardest. 📩 Email us: SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com 📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod ⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts and Spotify
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  Is Taking Things Slow Healthy or Avoidant? 01.04.2026 25min

  In this episode, we’re talking about one of the biggest gray areas in modern dating: taking things slow. Is it emotional maturity and healthy pacing, or is it just avoidance dressed up as self awareness? We unpack the difference between intentional slowness and prolonged confusion, why so many people benefit from undefined timelines, and how easy it is to get stuck in situationships that look deep but never actually move forward.We also get into:• How to tell the difference between healthy pacing and emotional avoidance • Why no title often means no accountability • Why some people want access without offering commitment • How ego can keep you stuck trying to be chosen • Why women need boundaries more than repeated conversations • Love bombing, future faking, and men showing up as their representative • Why taking things slow can sometimes be about emotional safety and literal safety✨ Mantra Moment: Moving with intention doesn’t require rushing, but it does require honesty. Emotional safety should create clarity, not confusion or prolonged uncertainty.If this episode hit home, let us know in the comments what your experience has been with “taking it slow” in dating.📩 Email us: SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com 📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod ⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts and Spotify
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  Do Women Owe Men Feminine Energy If the Man Isn’t Providing Masculine Leadership? 25.03.2026 28min

  In this episode we’re talking about feminine energy and the pressure women feel to stay soft even when the relationship dynamic doesn’t feel supportive. We unpack why survival mode changes how women show up in relationships and how quickly attraction shifts when partnership starts feeling like parenting.What we discuss:• Why feminine energy feels impossible without safety • The survival mode many women experience in relationships • Why mothering a partner kills attraction • The difference between softness and vulnerability • Why indecisiveness feels like lack of leadership • The emotional labor tied to cohabitation • Social media’s role in shaping feminine and masculine expectations✨ Mantra Moment: Softness emerges when there is safety, consistency and direction. It's not something women owe, it's something that's invited.📩 Email us: SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts & Spotify!
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  Should Black Women Stop Dating Men Who Grew Up on Survival Until They Go to Therapy? 18.03.2026 40min

  What happens when one person has done the work and the other hasn't even started? This week we're getting into a conversation that so many women are having behind closed doors but not enough people are saying out loud. In this episode we talk about: • Why survival mode shows up in dating and kills emotional intimacy • The difference between being a supportive partner and mothering a grown man • How struggle love culture removes accountability from men and puts pressure on women • What it actually feels like to be hypervigilant in a relationship and how it affects your health • Why your body always remembers even when your heart wants to forgive • Whether requiring therapy is a boundary or unrealistic • How some men weaponize therapy language instead of actually doing the work • The role mothers play in holding or not holding their sons accountable • Why more women are choosing to be single and why that's perfectly okay This episode is for every woman who has ever questioned whether she was asking for too much. Spoiler: you're not. ✨ Mantra Moment: Love should not require you to heal someone else. Black women should be allowed to choose someone who is actively doing the same work that they are and not be guilted for it. Growing up in survival mode can absolutely explain behavior, but what are you doing about it? 📩 Email us: SuburbanBlackGirlPod@gmail.com 📱 Follow us on all platforms: @SuburbanBlackGirlPod ⭐ Leave us a rating on Apple Podcasts and Spotify