Seeing Other People

Episodi

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  Stop “Shoulding” Yourself: How to Stop Comparing and Start Trusting Yourself 01.10.2026 58min

  Are you constantly thinking you should be married by now, should be over your ex, should know how you feel after a few dates, or should be further along in your life Dr. Lucette Beall joins me to break down what all of this “shoulding” actually does to our brains and how it can impact the choices we make in dating and relationships. We talk about societal timelines, learning to separate what you actually want from what you think you’re supposed to want, trusting yourself when dating, and how to stop measuring your life against everyone else’s.All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more)Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  Are You Doing Too Much in Your Relationships? 29.09.2026 45min

  Who keeps track of everything that needs to get done in your relationship? Ilana sits down with InvisiBILL – Anxiety Receipts founder Lisa Virginia Anderson to talk about mental load, invisible labor, and what happens when one person becomes the project manager of the relationship. They discuss why “just tell me what you need” isn't always as helpful as it sounds, how resentment builds when one person feels responsible for everything, and the signs to look for while dating that someone will actually be an equal partner.www.getinvisibill.com All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more)Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeopleGet $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  When You Know They’re Not Your Person But Can’t Let Go 28.09.2026 46min

  Ilana and Jake are coming to you from a rainy weekend in the Hamptons with lots to catch up on: Ilana officially understands football, someone finally offered her a subway seat at six and a half months pregnant, she took her glucose test, and they toured their first daycare. Then, they get into your listener questions about how to stop internalizing rejection as proof that you weren’t “enough,” whether you can really stay close friends with someone who rejected you, wedding etiquette when your ideal date is close to a family member’s wedding, and what to do when you’ve spent three years in a situationship, know he’s not your person, but still can’t bring yourself to let him go.All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more)Head to LolaBlankets.com and use code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE to get 40% OFF your order. Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  Rejection Doesn’t Mean You Weren’t Enough 24.09.2026 50min

  Rejection can make you question everything about yourself. Was I too much? Not enough? Did I do something wrong? And why did they choose someone else instead of me? In this solo episode, I’m talking about why someone not choosing you doesn’t mean you weren’t good enough, how to stop looking to everyone else for answers, and what rejection actually does and doesn’t say about you. Plus, I’m answering your questions about compatibility, self-trust, comparison, and learning when to take feedback to heart versus when to let it go.All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more)Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  Are You Dating for the Relationship You Actually Want? 22.09.2026 38min

  Stefanos Sifandos, relationship coach, speaker, and author of Tuned In and Turned On, joins Seeing Other People to talk about what happens after you find the right person. We dive into why a relationship isn’t the finish line, how healthy relationships can bring unresolved patterns to the surface, and how to tell the difference between something you need to work through and something your partner needs to change.We also talk about knowing yourself before dating, finding alignment in values instead of relying on a checklist, and why sometimes the best thing you can do for your dating life is pause dating altogether. Stefanos shares how to navigate conflict, communicate your needs, move through a fear of being alone, and stay connected through major life transitions. Plus, he shares the relationship advice that has stuck with him most: don’t contort yourself to impress someone else. Find Stefanos at tunedinandturnedonbook.com, stefanossifandos.com and @stefanossifandosAll links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more)Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  Stop Wishing Away the Single Chapter of Your Life 21.09.2026 48min

  This week, we’re talking daycare waitlists, baby registry decisions, why Ilana is becoming a baby product expert, and the realities of figuring out taxes when you’re self-employed. Then we answer your questions: Is the second date too soon to say you’re serious about having kids? How do you stop finding love from becoming the one thing you can’t stop thinking about? And should you write someone off for sending a low-effort like on a dating app? Plus, our advice for making your dating profile actually give people something to respond to. All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more)Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  When Your Parents Don’t Support Your Relationship Choices 17.09.2026 48min

  An anonymous guest joins the podcast to talk about navigating a long-term relationship in a big city — from taking their first trip together just two months into dating, to moving in together before getting engaged, to ultimately buying a home together.We talk about the pressure of the “relationship escalator,” making major decisions on your own timeline, navigating family members who don’t understand your choices, and how communication, trust, and knowing when something feels right can matter more than doing things in the “right” order.All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more)Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  Getting Unstuck: How to Rewrite the Story You Tell Yourself 15.09.2026 43min

  Jane Garnett, former Hollywood producer turned psychotherapist and author of This Time With Feeling, joins the podcast to talk about how to get unstuck — from old emotional patterns, the stories we tell ourselves, and the idea that our lives are supposed to look a certain way. We talk about why understanding our patterns doesn’t always stop us from repeating them, how disappointment can become a gateway to the next chapter, and why getting back in touch with our bodies, intuition, and curiosity can help us move forward.Plus, Jane shares how to rewrite the stories we’ve created about ourselves, stop waiting for life to begin, become the protagonist of our own stories, and why sometimes we need to explore rather than nix when it comes to relationships.Get Jane’s memoir, This Time With Feeling: This Time With Feeling Website: janegarnett.com Instagram: @thebananajane See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  How We’d Date If We Had to Start Over & Dating Your Ex’s Friend 14.09.2026 50min

  Ilana and Jake catch up on baby prep, their first stroller arrival, Ilana’s newfound obsession with baby clothes, Jake’s thoughts on being married to a content creator, and why apparently having a twin bed until age 26 builds character. Then, they get into your listener questions. If they were single today, how would they actually go about finding their person? They talk dating apps, singles events, meeting people organically, getting set up by friends, and why going out with the sole mission of meeting someone might actually make dating harder. Plus, they weigh in on a messy Hinge situation: is your ex’s friend fair game?Shop Joolz strollers at www.joolz.com and check out our Joolz Aer² lightweight stroller!All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more)Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLEStock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeopleGet $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  You Can Miss Someone and Still Know You Shouldn’t Be Together 10.09.2026 50min

  Missing someone after a breakup can make you question everything. Did you make a mistake? Does still loving them mean you should try again? And if nobody else compares, does that mean they were actually your person? In this solo episode, I’m talking about why missing someone doesn’t mean you should be together, how nostalgia can make us forget why things ended, and how to tell the difference between genuinely wanting someone back and simply missing what you had. Plus, I’m answering your questions about exes, second chances, and moving on when you still care.Mentioned in this episode:Juice Glasses with Lid & Glasses without lidAll links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more)Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  Finding Love, Getting Married, and Figuring Out What Comes Next 08.09.2026 48min

  Erica Shea is back on Seeing Other People, and this time she’s married. After years of dating, heartbreak, situationships, and wondering if she was ever going to find her person, Erica is now on the other side of the story—and realizing that finding your person is only the beginning. We talk about what it feels like to finally have the life you spent so much time hoping for, why she wishes she could tell her younger self that she wasn’t as behind as she felt, and how all those moments that felt like setbacks eventually led somewhere she never could have planned. We also get into getting fired and finding the happiest place she’s ever been in her career, moving to Denver, trusting the next chapter even when it’s scary, and what marriage actually looks like once the wedding is over. Erica opens up about navigating two families, holidays, the pressure around having kids, and the ways our brains—and social media—can convince us that everything is going wrong. Plus, we revisit the dating advice that helped her find her husband: sometimes you really should go on one more date. Follow Erica Shea: @ericasheaaa on InstagramAll links here (submit a Q, pitch yourself to the pod, dating coaching & more)Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  Preparing for Baby, Eating Our Way Through NYC & Football Season 07.09.2026 42min

  This week, we’re catching up on life lately. We talk baby registry overwhelm, the stroller we think we’re getting, football season, the best things we ate this week, and how different our lives will look this time next year. Plus, Ilana’s newest obsession, getting ahead before maternity leave, and what we’ve been watching and reading.Chapters:00:00 UPPAbaby vs. Bugaboo02:40 Life lately04:30 Gratitudes07:00 Ilana learns the Jets12:00 Our week of eating around NYC17:00 Torrisi and Jake’s dress code scare22:00 Ilana’s newest obsession25:30 Baby registry overwhelm28:30 Thinking about life with a baby30:00 Pregnancy, work, and slowing down35:00 Preparing for maternity leave37:00 What we’re watching and readingAll links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more)Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  Everyone Around Me Is Getting Married or Having Kids and I'm Still on The Apps 03.09.2026 53min

  Harry is back for his fourth appearance on Seeing Other People, and this time he's on camera for the first time. He just turned 35, his younger brother got engaged, and the feeling that everyone around you is hitting milestones while you're still out here going on first dates? We get into all of it. How do you make peace with being on a completely different timeline than your friends, your siblings, even your parents? How do you keep showing up when things keep falling apart, and why stopping is never really the answer? Harry also took a stand-up comedy class and based his entire set on his dating life, which taught him how to look at his experience through a different lens.All links here (submit a Q, pitch yourself to the pod, dating coaching & more)Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  The One Who Broke You Can't Heal You 01.09.2026 44min

  Najwa Zebian, author of The One Who Broke You Can’t Heal You, joins the podcast for a conversation about heartbreak, healing, and what it really means to move on when someone has hurt you. We talk about why the person who broke you can’t be the one to heal you, why closure is a myth, and how waiting for an apology, an explanation, or someone’s regret can keep you stuck. Najwa shares what it looks like to take your healing back, stop making excuses for people who hurt you, and rebuild a version of yourself that knows what you deserve.We also get into trauma bonds, why people stay in toxic relationships, how gaslighting can make you question your own judgment, and how to support someone who knows they should leave but isn’t ready yet. Plus, Najwa shares the dating advice that changed the way she looks at relationships: date someone who is kind by nature — not someone you have to convince to treat you well.Get The One Who Broke You Can’t Heal You wherever you buy books, or listen to the audiobook narrated by Najwa herself.Follow Najwa:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/najwazebianWebsite: https://najwazebian.com/All links here (submit a Q, pitch yourself to the pod, dating coaching & more)Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeopleGet $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  Exes Coming Back, Bad Dating Patterns & “I’m Not Ready for a Relationship” 31.08.2026 48min

  Jake spent the weekend hosting a fantasy football draft while Barkley lived his best boys day and paid for it later, and Ilana went to her first pregnancy brand event and is currently dealing with back pain that she describes as someone stabbing her. Also: Ilana read two books in a week, including Hayden Panettiere's memoir and Michelle Obama's Becoming, and somehow still can't remember Garrett Wilson's name. Three listener questions this week: should you hear out an ex who went eight months no contact before reaching out, can you actually change your type if it keeps not working out for you, and four great dates followed by "I'm not ready for a relationship" followed by him being in one two weeks later. How do you not take that personally?All links here (submit a Q, share your story on the pod, dating coaching & more)Get FREE full sized Mascara on your first purchase at Jonesroadbeauty.com with code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  Different Timelines, Rejection Texts & The Most Unhinged Relationship Advice 27.08.2026 53min

  What do you do when you and your partner have different ideal timelines 3 years into your relationship? How to be less anxious after a great date? I’m answering your questions about relationship timelines, rejection texts, dating anxiety vs. chemistry, and surviving the first trimester. Plus, I’m reacting to the most unhinged marriage advice you’ve ever received and sharing why I’m seriously missing marathon training right now.All links here (submit a Q, pitch yourself to the pod, dating coaching & more)Head to LolaBlankets.com and use code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE to get 40% OFF your order. Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLEThe best deals go fast on Whatnot, so don’t wait. Download Whatnot today and get freeshipping on your first order. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  The Love of Your Life Would Want to Date You 25.08.2026 45min

  Serena Kerrigan, founder of Let’s Fucking Date and author of Let’s Fcking Date*, joins the podcast for a long-overdue reunion — five years after she was one of the first guests on Seeing Other People. We talk about why modern dating needs a new rulebook, how to stop dating from a place of scarcity, why rejection doesn’t mean something is wrong with you, and what it looks like to actually trust yourself and move on when someone isn’t giving you what you want. Plus, Serena shares what she’s learned about repeating dating patterns, raising your standards without becoming too picky, being open-minded about who your person might be, and why the right person won’t be scared off by you saying you want something serious. We also get into healthy relationships, maintaining independence, handling conflict, social media comparison, feeling like you’re running out of time, and knowing when choosing yourself means walking away. Get Serena’s book: Let’s Fcking Date* — letsfuckingdate.com See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  What Maternity Leave Looks Like When You’re Self-Employed 24.08.2026 40min

  We’re back with a LOT to catch up on after another Jonas Brothers concert. We’re sharing what went down at MSG, why our entire section was rooting for us, and how we felt when it didn’t happen. Then, I’m sharing a big update about the future of Seeing Other People, what “maternity leave” looks like when you work for yourself, and what changes you can expect to see in the SOP world. Plus, I’m officially showing, back pain has entered the chat, and I have some feelings about people touching my belly. Then we’re answering your questions about dealing with wedding planning decision fatigue and how to stop spiraling between dates when the next one isn’t on the calendar.All links here (submit a Q, pitch yourself to the pod, dating coaching & more)Head to LolaBlankets.com and use code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE to get 40% OFF your order. Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLEThe best deals go fast on Whatnot, so don’t wait. Download Whatnot today and get free shipping on your first order. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  Why Having a Timeline for Love Can Keep You From Finding It 20.08.2026 48min

  Isabelle Surielow, PhD candidate, matchmaker, and relationship consultant, joins the podcast to unpack what it really means to find love — and why sometimes the search for a relationship is actually a search for ourselves. We talk about dating with intention, why knowing what you want matters, the difference between standards and preferences, and how focusing on how you want to feel in a relationship can completely change the way you approach dating. We also get into the idea of “spark” vs. stability, what we can learn from relationships that don’t work out, why you shouldn’t sacrifice your peace for the wrong relationship, the pressure to meet marriage and relationship timelines, and whether there really is such a thing as a soulmate. Plus, Isabelle shares some seriously rom-com-worthy stories about meeting people through synchronicity, why you can’t force love, and how staying open to the unexpected might be the best dating strategy of all. Find Isabelle: @izzysurielowALL links here (submit a Q, pitch yourself to the pod, dating coaching & more)Head to LolaBlankets.com and use code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE to get 40% OFF your order. Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLEThe best deals go fast on Whatnot, so don’t wait. Download Whatnot today and get freeshipping on your first order. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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  The Part of Relationships Nobody Teaches You Until You’re Already in One 18.08.2026 47min

  Mika Ross, therapist and relationship coach, joins the podcast to talk about the parts of relationships nobody teaches you until you’re already in one. We talk about what it actually takes to build a healthy relationship beyond chemistry and compatibility, why communication is so much more complicated than “just talk about it,” and how to navigate conflict without letting resentment build.Mika also shares practical advice for handling big feelings, setting boundaries, maintaining your individuality while being part of a partnership, and communicating when you and your partner seem to speak completely different emotional languages. Plus, we get into the realities of long-term relationships, how relationships evolve as life changes, why healthy relationships can still be messy and imperfect, and the skills we all have to learn while we’re in the relationship. Find Mika on Instagram: @mikaross.therapist and explore her relationship resources at mikaross.comALL links here (submit a Q, pitch yourself to the pod, dating coaching & more)Head to LolaBlankets.com and use code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLE to get 40% OFF your order. Stock up on the best elevated essentials + get free shipping & 365 day returns at Quince.com/seeingotherpeople Get $10 off your Nutrafol subscription at nutrafol.com promo code SEEINGOTHERPEOPLEThe best deals go fast on Whatnot, so don’t wait. Download Whatnot today and get freeshipping on your first order. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.