Sit Around the Fire

Episodi

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  #061 Rest Is Not A Reward 04.08.2026 22min

  Have you ever finally had a chance to rest, only to realize you could not actually relax?Your body may be sitting still, but your mind is making lists, scanning for what needs to be done, and reminding you of all the ways you could be more productive. You are resting, but you are not at rest.In this solo episode, Ashlea explores why slowing down can feel so uncomfortable, especially for those of us who have spent years being the strong one, the dependable one, or the person who keeps everything moving. She talks about the old programming that teaches us to earn our rest, the nervous system patterns that keep us braced for the next problem, and what happens when productivity becomes part of our identity.This conversation is an invitation to look beneath the guilt and become curious about the message underneath it. Rest is not a reward for reaching the end of your list. It is not something you have to prove you deserve. It is part of being human, staying connected to yourself, and remembering that your worth was never dependent on how much you could carry.Friends, take your foot off the gas for a moment. Relax, breathe, and be curious. You are allowed to rest before you collapse.
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  #060 Resilience Can Be Learned: The 4-Part FUEL Model with Dr. Rose Aghdami 27.07.2026 51min

  What if resilience is not about being tougher, pushing harder, or pretending that difficult things do not affect you?What if resilience is actually a collection of skills that can be learned, practiced, and strengthened?In this episode of Sit Around the Fire, Ashlea sits down with Dr. Rose Aghdami, coaching psychologist, resilience specialist, and author of How to FUEL Your Resilience, to explore what it really means to become more resilient.Dr. Rose introduces her practical FUEL Your Resilience framework and explains how flexibility, the use of resources, energy, and an internal locus of control can help us respond more effectively to life’s challenges.Together, Ashlea and Dr. Rose talk about the patterns that often make resilience more difficult, including perfectionism, emotional avoidance, rigid thinking, unrealistic expectations, and the pressure to maintain control.They also discuss why accepting our emotions does not mean allowing those emotions to control us, how vulnerability can become a source of strength, and why “good enough” may be one of the most freeing phrases a high-achieving person can learn.In this episode, you will learn:• Why resilience is a learnable skill rather than a fixed personality trait• The four elements of the FUEL Your Resilience framework• How flexibility helps us navigate uncertainty and change• Why using available resources is a strength, not a weakness• How perfectionism and rigid thinking can undermine resilience• The difference between experiencing a feeling and treating it as a fact• How to develop a stronger internal locus of control• Why self-compassion and consistent practice matter• How resilient people create a fuller, calmer, and more meaningful life• Why strengthening yourself allows you to support others more effectivelyThis conversation is especially valuable for high-functioning adults, leaders, helpers, professionals, and anyone who appears capable on the outside but often feels overwhelmed, anxious, or depleted internally.You do not have to become unaffected by life to become resilient.You can learn how to recognize what you are feeling, respond with greater intention, use the resources available to you, and trust yourself to handle what comes next.ABOUT DR. ROSE AGHDAMIDr. Rose Aghdami is a coaching psychologist, resilience specialist, supervisor, trainer, international speaker, and the author of How to FUEL Your Resilience: A Practical Guide to Developing Resilience Skills for Professionals.Through her FUEL Your Resilience framework, she helps high-performing professionals develop practical resilience skills so they can respond to pressure, change, and uncertainty with greater confidence, flexibility, and self-awareness.RESOURCES AND GUEST LINKSLearn more about Dr. Rose Aghdami:https://www.drroseaghdami.comConnect with Dr. Rose on LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/roseaghdamiPurchase How to FUEL Your Resilience:https://www.amazon.com/How-FUEL-your-Resilience-Professionals/dp/1041062591
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  #059 Don’t Wait Until You’re Healed to Be in a Relationship 07.07.2026 27min

  So many people believe they need to be fully healed before they can be in a relationship.But what if that belief is actually keeping us isolated?In this episode of Sit Around the Fire, Ashlea Dillard explores why relationships are not just something we enter after healing — they are often one of the places healing actually happens.Drawing from psychodynamic theory, Jungian psychology, attachment theory, object relations theory, and humanistic psychology, Ashlea breaks down how relationships reveal unconscious patterns, activate old wounds, mirror hidden parts of ourselves, and give the nervous system new experiences of safety, repair, and connection.This episode is not about staying in unsafe or harmful relationships. It is about understanding the difference between being activated and being harmed, and recognizing that safe-enough relationships can become powerful spaces for growth, awareness, and healing.You do not have to be perfect to be loved.You are allowed to be loved while you are still learning.
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  #058 Start With Five Minutes: A Real Talk on Meditation with Mark Blacknell 30.06.2026 55min

  What does it actually take to go from survival mode to a settled nervous system? In this episode, I sit down with Mark Blacknell — who grew up navigating a tough childhood in Philadelphia, served in the Marines, and found his way to meditation and a life built around balance.This conversation is for anyone who's ever thought meditation "isn't for them," or tried it once, white-knuckled through 30 minutes, and quit. Mark breaks it all the way down: start small, build slow, and stop chasing some far-off enlightenment. Because as he puts it, enlightenment is just acting naturally.We get into Mark's story from Philly to the Marines, how nature and meditation cracked something open for him, what it looks like to bring this practice into a real community, and why balance — not perfection — is the whole point.You're not broken. You've been programmed. And practices like these are how you start living from the future forward.In this episode:Mark's childhood and military background, and what set the stage for changeHow nature and meditation became a turning pointPractical, beginner-friendly meditation techniques (no incense required)Why "balance is life, like the sun and earth"Meditation as a lifestyle — not a 30-minute choreWhat death and the present moment taught Mark about being aliveChapters:00:00 Introduction to Authentic Conversations01:41 Creating a Safe Space for Discussion03:12 Mark's Journey: From Philly to the Marines09:29 Transformation Through Nature and Meditation15:48 The Impact of Meditation on Life22:50 Bringing Meditation to the Community29:45 Understanding Meditation: A Practical Approach31:04 The Interconnection of Life and Spirituality32:48 Meditation: Starting Small and Building Up36:16 The Journey of Meditation: Expectations and Realizations38:41 Understanding Enlightenment and Authenticity41:08 Balance in Life: The Art of Meditation45:09 Life as a Continuous Practice of Meditation48:13 Appreciating the Present: Lessons from Life and DeathResources mentioned:StareAtTheWall.org → https://stareatthewall.orgZen Mind, Beginner's Mind by Shunryu Suzuki → https://www.amazon.com/dp/0804814804The Tassajara Bread Book by Edward Espe Brown → https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00A4U4V4QConnect with Mark:Website → https://stareatthewall.org🔥 Listen, subscribe, and sit around the fire with us:sitaroundthefire.orgashleadillard.com
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  #057 The Perfectionist and the People Pleaser 23.06.2026 22min

  Once upon a time, there was a girl named Ashlea. She was good at everything, she was the one who kept everyone okay, and from the outside she looked like she had it all figured out. She was also exhausted all the time and had no idea who she actually was.In this solo episode, I'm telling that story — mine, and maybe yours too — and unpacking the two survival patterns that ran my life for a long time: perfectionism and people pleasing. We're not treating these like bad habits you need more discipline to break. We're looking at them the way they actually work: as nervous system strategies your body learned to keep you safe.We get into perfectionism as a flight response — the foot-on-the-gas, plan-for-everything, control-it-all way of trying to outrun threat — and why it leaves you frozen and exhausted at the same time. Then we get into people pleasing as the fawn response: the gazelle who pours tea for the lion to make the threat go away, and the quiet, devastating cost of that — the masks, the lost preferences, the disappearing self.And then we turn toward the way out. Because here's the thing you've heard me say before, and I'll keep saying it: you're not broken. You've been programmed. And programming can be rewritten.What we coverWhy your nervous system is a prediction machine — and how the "what-ifs" are a survival system doing its jobPerfectionism as flight: control as a strategy to make the world feel safeWhy perfectionism keeps you stuck, indecisive, and exhausted with your foot on the gasWhy a small mistake can feel like an identity-level emergencyPeople pleasing as fawn: befriending the threat instead of fighting or fleeing itThe real cost of people pleasing — the loss of self, the masks, not knowing what you even likeHow these patterns get wired early, before we have language or choiceWhy we keep recreating the exact situations and relationships that reinforce themThe turn: thanking the pattern, sending your nervous system the memo, and living from the future forwardCampfire reflection for this weekWhere in your life are you still running a strategy that you don't need anymore?Tiny experiment: pick one low-stakes place this week and let it be imperfect on purpose, or let yourself have the unpopular preference. Then notice that you survived it. That's a rep.Connect & go deeperNervous system work, hypnotherapy, and coaching: ashleadillard.comMore episodes and resources: sitaroundthefire.orgShare this episode with someone who's always been "the strong one."
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  #056: Breaking the Silence: Trauma and Healing in First Responders — with Keven McNeill 16.06.2026 58min

  Most of us think the clock on trauma starts the first day on the job. Keven McNeill is here to tell you it started a long time before that.In this episode, Keven shares his journey through law enforcement, a defining 2016 incident, and the depression and PTSD that followed — and the long road back. What makes his story land isn't just the hard parts. It's the honesty about how trauma accumulates quietly, how it follows you home, and how the same hypervigilance that keeps you alive on shift can quietly take apart your life off the clock.As a former firefighter and paramedic, I've sat in a version of this. The culture, the pride, the unspoken rule that you handle it. Keven and I get into all of it — and where that culture has to change.We talk about what proactive mental health actually looks like (not the version you reach for after everything's already on fire), why leadership has to be part of the solution, and how the bravest thing a responder can do is find their voice and ask for help.In this conversation:Why trauma doesn't start with the uniform — and how childhood shapes who's drawn to this workKeven's 2016 incident and the aftermath that pulled him into a deep depressionThe toll 2020 took on first responders, and the weight of deadly-force decisionsHypervigilance — how it shows up at the dinner table, not just on duty, and why it's so hard to switch offWhere leadership fails responders, and what it looks like when leaders "act like humans"Rebuilding identity and purpose after the career, and the journey to acceptance and giving backResources mentioned:EMDR Therapy — https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/EMDRAcute Stress Adaptive Protocol (ASAP) — https://www.firstrespondercenter.com/Connect with Keven McNeil:LinkedIn — https://linkedin.com/in/kevinmcneilKeven's BooksMore from Sit Around the Fire:If this one hit home, you're not alone — and you don't have to carry it alone. For more conversations like this, the podcast, and the work I do with first responders and anyone ready to heal, head to sitaroundthefire.org and ashleadillard.com.
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  #055 The Most Important Investment You'll Ever Make 09.06.2026 20min

  We pour money, time, and energy into everything outside of ourselves — our kids, our businesses, our homes, the people who depend on us — and then we wonder why we feel so depleted. In this episode, Ashlea makes the case that investing in yourself isn't the luxury you get to once everything else is handled. It's the foundation everything else is built on.Drawing on her background in emergency services and her work as a Licensed Professional Counselor and clinical hypnotherapist, Ashlea walks through three arenas of self-investment — therapy, coaching, and physical health — and reframes each through the lens of the nervous system and the brain. You'll learn why the guilt you feel when you choose yourself is just old programming defending itself, why you are the single asset that produces every other return in your life, and how to make one concrete investment in yourself this week.This one's a permission slip and a strategy, all at once.What We CoverWhy investing in yourself feels so hard — and why the resistance isn't a stop signHow your brain runs the "path of least resistance" and why familiar isn't the same as safeTherapy as the investment in understanding where you've been — working on the rudderCoaching as the investment in where you're going — living from the future forwardPhysical health as nervous system care, not vanity — tending the vesselThe compound interest of self-investment and why waiting is the most expensive choiceThe reframe that changes everything: you are the sourceEpisode Timestamps(Adjust to final recording.)00:00 — Intro01:30 — When was the last time you invested in you?04:00 — Why this is so hard: the programming and the prediction machine08:00 — Therapy: the investment in understanding yourself (the rudder)13:00 — Coaching: the investment in where you're going18:00 — Physical health: the investment in the vessel23:00 — The investment frame: why this is the highest return27:00 — One step to take this week + how to work togetherKey TakeawayYou are the asset that produces every other return in your life. Investing in yourself doesn't take away from the people you love — it increases the value of the one source they're all depending on.Work With AshleaClinical psychotherapy and hypnotherapy (Colorado) and one-on-one coaching (available inside and outside Colorado). Start a conversation at ashleadillard.com.LinksWebsite & resources: sitaroundthefire.orgWork with Ashlea: ashleadillard.com
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  #054 From Trauma to Triumph: Packy Dempsey Shares His Journey Through the Fire 02.06.2026 40min

  This episode hits hard. Packy Dempsey, a retired law enforcement officer, takes us deep into the moment that changed everything — and how he turned that crucible into a mission of healing, not just for himself, but for first responders and military alike.We don't skip past the hard parts. Packy walks us through the four seconds that nearly ended his life, the chaos on scene, and the aftermath that no academy prepares you for: the guilt, the shame, the silent onset of addiction, and the dangerous belief that strength means carrying it alone. Then he shows us the other side — the brotherhood, the faith, the daily practices, and the radical gratitude that brought him back to life.This is a conversation about what it really costs to do this work, and what it takes to heal from it. Get ready to feel, reflect, and find the courage to face your own battles.In this episode:The life-altering four seconds that nearly took Packy's life and changed his world foreverThe raw truth behind police trauma, accountability, and the mental toll of critical incidentsHow complacency, identity, and the "Superman complex" can be deadly in high-stakes rolesThe importance of vulnerability, trust, and brotherhood among first respondersPractical tools — daily habits, training, and faith — that help Packy stay prepared and resilientThe transformative power of gratitude and community in healing from traumaA first look at Packy's upcoming book, which pairs vulnerability with authentic proof of survival and victoryA powerful call for men and women to break the silence, lean into support, and never fall aloneTimestamps:00:00 — Introduction: One of the toughest stories we've heard00:27 — Who was Packy before the moment that changed everything?02:47 — From mundane to miraculous: the story behind the four seconds04:18 — The chaos of the incident: a detailed recount of the critical moments on scene07:25 — The struggle to control the situation and the near loss of life09:40 — The mental and physical toll during and after the shooting11:29 — Understanding the psychological impact of police trauma15:10 — The real cost of high-stakes decision-making and the aftermath16:43 — How the trauma affected Packy's mental health and his journey to recovery21:06 — The role of support, vulnerability, and brotherhood in healing25:05 — The long road to mental peace: guilt, shame, and healing27:00 — How faith and community sustained Packy through his darkest days28:34 — The subtle but dangerous onset of addiction and coping mechanisms30:37 — The miraculous gift of gratitude in survival and recovery31:08 — What to do when you suspect someone is silently suffering36:52 — Behind the scenes of Packy's upcoming book and how it's a tool for healing38:32 — Training your mind: the key to readiness in emergencies39:28 — Final words of wisdom: face tomorrow with courage, not fearResources & Links:Packy Dempsey — Official Website: https://www.packydempsey.com/Crossroads of Trauma and Triumph (book coming soon — check back for release)Work with Ashlea: ashleadillard.com
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  #053 Be the Queen You Already Are 28.05.2026 12min

  Most women are waiting for permission to fully step into their power — but what if confidence isn't something you build? What if it's already inside you, ready to be claimed?In this special release episode of Sit Around the Fire, licensed professional counselor and clinical hypnotherapist Ashlea Dillard delivers a fiery, unfiltered message for every woman who's been playing small, waiting for the right moment, or surviving behind armor she no longer needs to wear.Ashlea breaks down the neuroscience behind why women hold back — how the nervous system codes growth as danger — and why courage isn't a feeling you wait for. It's a decision. A practice. A rewiring.You'll discover the powerful concept of "living from the future forward": how mental rehearsal and visualization aren't positive thinking — they're a brain-building blueprint. And you'll be introduced to the queen mindset: deep self-possession, unwavering decision, and the ability to walk into any room radiating authority — not because you've healed everything, but because you've decided who you are.This episode is for the woman who's tired of shrinking. Who's ready to stop leading from fear and start leading from love, abundance, and her own unshakeable truth.Your power is already in you. All that's left is to claim it.
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  #052 The Power of Mindfulness in Trauma Recovery: Adrianne Lind's Journey 26.05.2026 41min

  In this insightful conversation, Adrianne Lind shares her journey through trauma, healing, and the transformative power of mindfulness and yoga. Discover practical tools for managing PTSD, grief, and stress, and learn how to cultivate a resilient nervous system for a healthier, more balanced life.Topics Discussed:Trauma and PTSD recoveryThe role of yoga and mindfulness in healingNervous system regulation and resilienceAdrianne LindChapters00:00 Introduction to Healing Conversations01:24 The Message of Forgiveness06:07 Understanding the Nervous System's Role06:32 Yoga as a Healing Tool11:39 Navigating Grief and Trauma12:34 Mindfulness and Daily Life17:15 Responding vs. Reacting19:56 Incorporating Music and Meditation22:05 Mindful Walking and Nature Connection22:29 The Power of Breath and Posture25:50 Yoga and Grief Management29:30 Consistency in Mindfulness Practices33:10 Breathwork Techniques for Everyday Life35:54 Navigating Stress and Emotional Responses38:31 The Connection Between Trauma and Physical Health39:49 ClosingResourcesYoga Nidra for PTSD - https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6313445/Mindful Resilience Certification - https://yogaproject.org/mindful-resilience/Adrianne Lind's Website & Books - https://adriannelind.com/https://mybook.to/AdrianneLind
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  #051 The Real Reason Willpower Isn't Working 19.05.2026 20min

  Have you ever known exactly what you should do — and still found yourself repeating the same patterns anyway?That frustration isn't a character flaw. It's neuroscience.In this episode, Ashlea Dillard breaks down why the subconscious mind holds onto emotional patterns — even painful ones — and how modern hypnotherapy gives us a direct pathway to change them. Drawing on the foundational clinical work of Gil Boyne and the transpersonal frameworks of Matthew Brownstein, Ashlea explores how affect bridge techniques, neuroplasticity, and emotionally resonant imagery work together to create the kind of transformation that actually sticks.You'll walk away understanding:Why your subconscious is protecting you, not sabotaging you — and why that matters for healingHow neuroplasticity works and why repetition, emotion, and focused attention are the real drivers of lasting changeWhy intellectual insight alone often isn't enough — and what hypnotherapy does differentlyThe one reflection practice that can help you start identifying the stories keeping you stuckIf you've ever felt like you're trying to change but something invisible keeps pulling you back — this episode is for you.🔥 New episodes every week.Find all resources at sitaroundthefire.org and ashleadillard.com.
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  #050 Why Constant Fixing Keeps You Trapped—Shift from Doing to Being ft. Mitch Webb 14.05.2026 55min

  Are you exhausted from trying to fix yourself? More supplements, better routines, stricter discipline—and still your body feels like it's working against you. In this episode, I sit down with Mitch Webb to talk about something most healing conversations miss: the idea that your body isn't broken—it's actually doing exactly what it was designed to do. Your symptoms, your anxiety, your need to control everything? Those aren't signs of failure. They're signs of a nervous system that learned to protect you. Mitch gets raw and real about his own journey with control—how diet rules, rituals, and the relentless pursuit of perfection kept him stuck in a cycle of dysregulation. We trace how that need for certainty is rooted in early wounds, and why the path forward isn't about doing more—it's about finally learning to be. In this episode, we explore:• Why your survival responses are signs of resilience, not failure• How control becomes a safety mechanism—and what it costs you• The link between trauma, attachment, and the need for certainty• How to build a flexible nervous system by creating new experiences of safety• Why vulnerability isn't weakness—it's your greatest healing tool• Practical ways to shift from doing to being and finally feel at home in your skin This one isn't just for first responders or trauma survivors. It's for anyone exhausted by the endless chase for perfection and quick fixes. If you're ready to stop fighting your body and start trusting it, this episode is your permission slip. Connect with Mitch Webb at his website and social channels for personalized coaching and [email protected] New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you never miss one. 🎧 Listen & subscribe: sitaroundthefire.org | ashleadillard.com
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  #049 The Hidden History of Hypnosis They Don't Teach You 05.05.2026 28min

  What if everything you believe about yourself... isn't actually you?If you've ever felt stuck in the same patterns, overwhelmed by your own thoughts, or like healing is always just out of reach — this episode will change how you see your mind.In this powerful solo episode of Sit Around the Fire, we go deep into hypnosis, the subconscious mind, and emotional healing — exploring how this ancient, misunderstood practice is one of the most accessible tools for real, lasting transformation.You'll discover the surprising history of hypnosis — from ancient Egyptian sleep temples and Greek healing rituals to the revolutionary work of James Braid and Milton Erickson — and why it's always been a natural part of the human experience, not a stage trick.More importantly, you'll learn how your subconscious mind gets programmed through repetition, environment, and emotional experience — and how reprogramming those beliefs is the key to breaking free from overthinking, emotional patterns, and cycles that feel impossible to escape.You're not broken. You've been programmed. And that means you can change.✨ What you'll learn:How hypnosis works and its role in mental health and emotional healingThe ancient roots of hypnosis across Egyptian, Greek, and shamanic traditionsHow everyday trance states (driving, scrolling, daydreaming) are naturally hypnoticWhy your subconscious is shaped by repetition — not truthHow awareness becomes the first act of reprogramming and personal growth🔥 Quotable moments:"Hypnosis is a natural, universal human experience" — and you're probably already doing it."You're not broken — you've been programmed" — which means the code can be rewritten."Your inner voice is a form of hypnotic suggestion" — so what has yours been telling you?🎧 Episode chapters: 00:00 — Understanding everyday hypnosis 03:50 — The historical context of hypnosis 15:58 — Hypnosis in everyday life 25:21 — Reprogramming the mind🔑 Keywords: hypnosis for emotional healing, subconscious mind reprogramming, how hypnosis works, mental health podcast, healing podcast, subconscious beliefs, reprogramming the mind, self-healing, trauma healing, hypnotherapy, nervous system regulation, inner transformation, behavior change, mindset shift, personal growth, how to stop overthinking, hypnosis explained, neuro-hypnotism, awareness practice, trance states, ancient healing practices🌐 Resources mentioned:Ancient Egyptian sleep templesMilton Erickson FoundationJames Braid and neuro-hypnotismFranz Anton Mesmer and animal magnetismReady to rewire?If this episode hit home — share it with someone who's been stuck in the same loop. They need to hear this.And if you're ready to experience this work firsthand, visit ashleadillard.com to book a session or explore how hypnosis can help you break old patterns, shift your subconscious, and step into the life you actually want.
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  #048 From Combat to Civilian: Mental Health After the Military | Anthony Dyer 28.04.2026 43min

  What happens when the mission ends — but the war inside doesn't?In this episode, Ashlea Dillard sits down with Anthony Dyer, a former Air Force combat missions aviator, to explore one of the most underrepresented conversations in military mental health: what it truly costs to serve, and what it takes to heal.Anthony opens up about his firsthand experience with trauma, survivor's guilt, and the identity crisis that so many veterans face when they transition to civilian life. He speaks candidly about his battle with alcoholism, the stigma around seeking help in the military, and how he ultimately found healing through community, purpose, and helping others.Whether you're a veteran navigating the transition out of service, a mental health professional working with military populations, or someone who loves a service member — this episode will meet you where you are.In this episode, you'll hear:Why mental health stigma runs so deep in military culture — and how to push past itThe real impact of survivor's guilt on identity and daily lifeHow prolonged exposure therapy became a turning point in Anthony's recoveryWhy "helping is healing" — and how serving others became his path forwardThe story behind his book Moon Child and the inspiration it offers to others still fighting their own battles"It's okay not to be okay." "Helping is healing." "It's not if, it's when that hits."Anthony's journey is one of raw honesty, hard-won perseverance, and the quiet power of community. This is a conversation that needed to be had.🎧 Listen now — and share this episode with someone who needs to hear it.🔗 Link to Anthony's Book Moon Child☎️ Ready to dive into your own work? Schedule your free 30 minute consultation and explore more at ashleadillard.comKeywords: military mental health, veteran trauma, survivor's guilt, Air Force veteran, identity after military service, transition to civilian life, alcoholism recovery, healing and perseverance, veteran community support, Moon Child book Anthony Dyer
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  #047 Rewire Your Brain with Words: The Power of Self-Talk 21.04.2026 20min

  The most important conversation you'll ever have is the one happening in your own mind. And chances are, you're not paying attention to it.In this solo episode, Ashlea Dillard breaks down how the language you use every day — the phrases you repeat on autopilot, the words you say under your breath when things get hard — is literally shaping your brain. Your subconscious doesn't filter truth from repetition. It just builds around whatever you keep saying. So when you're walking around telling yourself "I'm so tired," "I can't handle this," or "I'm just an anxious person" — you're not being honest with yourself. You're giving your nervous system instructions.Ashlea walks through the most common phrases that quietly keep you stuck, shares practical language swaps rooted in neuroplasticity that shift something real (without bypassing what's true), and goes deeper into how the words you repeat every day stop being things you say — and start becoming who you believe you are. This one is going to hit. Come ready to listen differently.In this episode:— Why your brain treats repetition as reality— How repetition + emotion strengthen the neural pathways behind your beliefs— The four phrases doing the most damage (and what to say instead)— Why "I get to" instead of "I have to" creates genuine agency— How your daily language is quietly building your identity right nowResources mentioned:— Neuroplasticity and the Brain's Ability to Change: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/neuroplasticity— The Power of Positive Self-Talk by Louise Hay: https://www.amazon.com/You-Can-Heal-Your-Life/dp/0937611018— Mindset Works — Developing a Growth Mindset: https://www.mindsetworks.com/— Learn more about Ashlea: https://ashleadillard.com/mindset, self-talk, neuroplasticity, mental health, personal growth, language, identity, emotional health
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  #046 He Faced the Unsurvivable — Here's What He Found on the Other Side Ty Gipson 14.04.2026 48min

  What does it take to survive the unsurvivable — and come out the other side with purpose?In this episode of Sit Around the Fire, host Ashlea Dillard sits down with Ty Gipson — motivational speaker, organ transplant recipient, and living proof that adversity doesn't get the last word.Ty was diagnosed with juvenile diabetes at just 11 years old. For over a decade, life felt normal. Then, without warning, his kidneys began to fail. What followed was a grueling journey through organ failure, transplant surgery, and the slow, uncertain road to recovery — all while holding onto a single question that would define his life: Do I want to grow, or do I want to die?His answer changed everything.In this episode, Ty shares:What it was actually like to face kidney failure and depend on organ donation to surviveThe pivotal mindset shift that transformed his recovery — and how you can apply it todayHis 3-step framework for navigating life's hardest momentsWhy "toxic positivity" is real — and what genuine resilience actually looks likeThe role his mother, his wife, and his faith played in pulling him throughWhat his unexpected journey with Disney taught him about storytelling and communityWhy waiting is the enemy of healing, and what to do insteadTy doesn't sugarcoat the darkness. He walked through it. And what he found on the other side is the foundation of his work as a speaker, advocate, and voice for the organ donation community."On the other side of adversity are some really amazing things," he says. "You have every tool you need equipped with you right now."Whether you're facing a health crisis, a career collapse, a broken relationship, or simply a season of life that doesn't make sense — this conversation will remind you that the wall in front of you is worth the climb.Key Takeaways:Resilience isn't about feeling strong. It's about taking one small step when everything in you wants to stop.Your "why" is your anchor. Find it before the storm hits.Humor isn't avoidance — it's armor.Sharing your story doesn't just help others. It heals you.Getting 1% better every day compounds into a completely different life.Episode Chapters:00:00 — Meet Ty Gipson01:50 — Living with juvenile diabetes05:17 — When the kidneys fail: Ty's transplant story09:55 — The life-changing gift of organ donation12:42 — What adversity actually teaches you16:48 — 3 steps to overcome any challenge19:10 — Sitting with the unknowns22:15 — The real power of positive thinking25:20 — Stop waiting. Start now.29:27 — Ty's unexpected chapter at Disney37:24 — Calling out toxic positivity41:31 — Choosing to stay positive when it's hard43:57 — How to connect with Tyadversity and resilience, organ donation awareness, juvenile diabetes story, kidney transplant survivor, motivational speaker podcast, overcoming health challenges, positive mindset tips, personal growth podcast, chronic illness and mental health, Sit Around the Fire podcast
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  #045 Why You’re Tired All the Time (It’s Not Just Physical): Emotional Exhaustion & Burnout 06.04.2026 19min

  Do you feel constantly tired—even when you’re getting enough sleep, eating well, and doing “all the right things”?You’re not alone. And the truth is… your exhaustion might not be physical.In this solo episode of Sit Around the Fire, therapist and hypnotherapist Ashlea Dillard explores the deeper reasons behind chronic fatigue, emotional exhaustion, and burnout—and why so many high performers, helpers, and first responders feel drained despite doing everything “right.”Ashlea shares a real, honest reflection from her own recent experience with fatigue and breaks down how emotional load, decision fatigue, suppressed emotions, and nervous system dysregulation can silently deplete your energy.If you’ve been feeling overwhelmed, mentally drained, or stuck in a cycle of pushing through exhaustion, this episode will help you understand what your body is actually trying to tell you—and how to begin restoring your energy from the inside out.✨ You don’t need to push harder. You need to listen differently.🔑 What You’ll Learn in This Episode:Why you feel tired all the time (even when you’re doing everything “right”)The connection between emotional exhaustion and physical fatigueHow decision fatigue and overthinking drain your energyThe impact of suppressed emotions on your nervous systemWhy rest doesn’t work if your body is still in survival modeSimple ways to create space and begin restoring your energy🔥 Key Takeaways:Your exhaustion isn’t just physical—it’s emotional and neurologicalYou’re not lazy or unmotivated—your system is overloadedReal energy comes from nervous system regulation, not just restAwareness is the first step toward sustainable healing🎯 Chapters:00:00 Why You Feel Tired All the Time00:45 Personal Reflection on Fatigue03:00 The Nervous System & True Rest07:00 Hidden Energy Drains (Emotional Load & Decision Fatigue)12:00 The Deeper Truth Behind Exhaustion14:00 Shifting Out of Survival Mode17:00 Simple Integration Practice19:00 Closing Thoughts🔍 Keywords (SEO):chronic fatigue, emotional exhaustion, burnout, mental health, nervous system regulation, decision fatigue, overthinking, stress, suppressed emotions, trauma, self-care, therapy, hypnosis, fatigue recovery, high performer burnout, first responders mental health🌐 Resources & Links:🔗 Sit Around the Fire Podcast: https://sitaroundthefire.com🔗 Work with Ashlea Dillard (Therapy & Hypnosis): https://ashleadillard.com🎧 If This Resonated…Send this to someone who’s been feeling exhausted lately.And if you’re ready to stop pushing through and start understanding your energy—this is your starting point.
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  #044 The Truth About Intimacy: Self-worth, Trauma, and Communication with Pauline Ryeland 31.03.2026 49min

  What if the biggest barrier to intimacy in your relationship isn’t your partner—but your relationship with yourself?In this powerful episode of Sit Around the Fire, host Ashlea Dillard sits down with Pauline Ryeland to explore the deeper psychology of relationships, intimacy, and connection. Together, they unpack how self-worth, communication patterns, trauma, and life transitions directly impact emotional and physical intimacy.This conversation dives into the foundations of conscious relating, highlighting how disconnection often stems from unresolved stress, past experiences, and nervous system dysregulation—not just surface-level relationship issues.Pauline shares her journey into sexual education and explains why understanding sexual energy as a life force is key to reclaiming connection, confidence, and fulfillment. You’ll learn how NLP, personal growth, and self-awareness can transform not only your relationship with your partner—but with yourself.Whether you’re navigating a long-term relationship, rebuilding intimacy, or seeking deeper emotional connection, this episode offers practical tools and mindset shifts to help you reconnect, communicate, and thrive.✨ If you’ve ever felt disconnected, stuck, or unsure how to communicate your needs—this conversation is for you.relationships, intimacy, self-worth, communication in relationships, trauma and relationships, emotional connection, conscious relating, sexual energy, NLP, personal growth, relationship healing, reconnecting with partner, mental health and relationships, nervous system regulation, intimacy issuesSelf-worth and self-love are the foundation of healthy relationships and intimacyEmotional and physical intimacy start with connection to selfTrauma and stress can silently disrupt communication and connectionConscious relating requires presence, awareness, and intentionSexual energy is deeply connected to overall life force and vitalityLife transitions can shift relationship dynamics—and require recalibrationOpen, honest communication is essential for intimacy and trustPractical tools can help couples reconnect and rebuild closenessPersonal growth directly enhances relationship satisfactionNervous system regulation plays a key role in intimacy and connection00:00 Introduction to Relationships, Intimacy & Mental Health01:53 Pauline’s Journey into Sexual Education & Personal Growth04:36 How Self-Worth Impacts Intimacy and Connection07:41 Navigating Life Transitions in Relationships09:39 Reconnecting in Long-Term Relationships11:50 Addressing Intimacy Challenges Head-On15:46 Communication Skills for Deeper Connection20:01 Trauma, Stress & the Nervous System in Relationships24:37 Understanding Sexual Energy as Life Force29:53 What is Conscious Relating?34:57 Practical Tools to Rebuild Intimacy39:50 Unlocking Sexual Potential & Personal Growth44:53 Closing Thoughts & Resources
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  #043: The Hidden Cost of Always Being the Strong One: Emotional Exhaustion, Vulnerability & Healing 24.03.2026 25min

  Are you the one everyone relies on… but secretly feel exhausted, disconnected, or overwhelmed?In this solo episode of Sit Around the Fire, therapist and hypnotherapist Ashlea Dillard explores the hidden cost of always being the strong one—and why this role, while admirable, can lead to emotional exhaustion, nervous system dysregulation, and deep disconnection from yourself and others.If you’ve ever felt like you have to “hold it all together,” struggle to ask for support, or find yourself constantly pushing through despite burnout… this episode will resonate deeply.Ashlea breaks down how the “strong one” identity is often learned and adaptive, rooted in past experiences where vulnerability didn’t feel safe. She shares how this pattern can show up in your daily life—and more importantly, how to begin releasing emotional suppression, embracing vulnerability, and allowing support back in.This episode also includes a guided hypnosis-style integration to help you gently let go of what you’ve been carrying and reconnect with a sense of internal safety and support.✨ You don’t have to do life alone. And you don’t have to earn rest.🔑 What You’ll Learn in This Episode:The emotional toll of always being the strong oneSigns of emotional repression, burnout, and nervous system exhaustionHow hyper-independence keeps you stuck and disconnectedWhy vulnerability is essential for healing and personal growthPractical reflection prompts to help you shift patternsA guided integration to release pressure and reconnect with support🔥 Key Takeaways:You don’t have to earn rest or supportStrength isn’t just holding it all together—it’s allowing yourself to be seenAwareness is the first step toward real healing and change🎯 Chapters:00:00 Introduction to Healing Conversations00:57 The Burden of Being the Strong One04:53 Understanding the Strong One's Identity06:48 The Impact of Learned Behaviors07:32 The Hidden Costs of Emotional Suppression15:04 Redefining Strength and Vulnerability18:34 Guided Integration for Mindfulness20:43 Embracing the Present Moment20:49 Embracing Softness and Awareness23:48 Releasing Burdens and Finding Supportmental health, emotional exhaustion, vulnerability, support, personal growth, self-care, resilience, healing, nervous system regulation, emotional repression, burnout recovery, trauma healing, therapy, hypnosis, first responders mental health🌐 Resources & Links:🔗 Sit Around the Fire Podcast: https://sitaroundthefire.com🔗 Work with Ashlea Dillard (Therapy & Hypnosis): https://ashleadillard.com🎧 If This Resonated…Share this episode with someone who’s always been the strong one.And if you’re ready to start your own healing journey—support is available.
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  #042 First Responder Families: How to Heal, Communicate, and Thrive Under Pressure with TJ & Sarah 19.03.2026 44min

  In this powerful episode of Sit Around the Fire, host Ashlea Dillard sits down with Sarah Joy Prieur and TJ to explore the real-life challenges of first responder families—and what it actually takes to move from survival mode into true, sustainable thriving.Together, they unpack the mental health impact of first responder life, including chronic stress, emotional suppression, and the often unspoken normalization of suffering within the culture. Through raw honesty and lived experience, Sarah and TJ share how they transformed their relationship, mindset, and daily systems using mindfulness, intentional communication, and structured personal growth practices.This conversation dives deep into:How trauma and high-stress careers affect relationships and family dynamicsWhy many first responder families feel stuck—and how to break the cycleThe role of nervous system regulation, gratitude, and daily structure in healingHow to rebuild connection, clarity, and purpose in the midst of chaosThrough their work with Real Elevation, Sarah and TJ are helping others cultivate resilience, discipline, and authentic alignment—proving that no matter how intense the environment, healing and transformation are always possible.If you or someone you love is in a first responder role, this episode is a must-listen for learning how to communicate better, reconnect deeply, and create a life that feels grounded, intentional, and fulfilling.You don’t have to just survive this life—you can learn to thrive in it.00:00 – Understanding First Responder Family Dynamics00:19 – Mental Health, Mindfulness, and Emotional Regulation04:29 – Turning Trauma into Growth and Purpose08:52 – Breaking the Culture of Normalized Suffering16:15 – Communication Strategies That Actually Work22:03 – Mindfulness, Spirituality, and Self-Awareness29:54 – Building Resilience Through Real ElevationIf this episode resonated with you, share it with a first responder family who needs this message.✨ Follow, rate, and review Sit Around the Fire to help us continue bringing powerful conversations like this to life.And remember:Heal. Transform. Impact.first responder mental health, first responder families, firefighter family stress, police family life, trauma recovery, mindfulness for anxiety, communication in relationships, nervous system regulation, mental health for first responders, resilience training, personal growth, emotional healing, gratitude practice, structured routines, stress management, marriage in high-stress careers, first responder spouse support