You, Me and the Family Tree - A Family Constellation Podcast — подкаст

Meeting Unexpected Death - A Family Constellation Perspective with Suzi Tucker 15.07.2026 54хв

Episode 20: Meeting Unexpected Death — A Family Constellation Perspective with Suzi TuckerHow do we meet death when it arrives unexpectedly?This conversation was inspired by the recent loss of my dear friend, a beloved member of my community, whose life, wisdom, and presence continue to touch many people.In this conversation, Suzi Tucker and I explore grief, loss, and the questions that emerge when someone we love dies sooner than we imagined.Drawing from a Family Constellation perspective, we talk about the shock of loss, the future we imagined with those we love, the role of ancestors, and the ways people continue to influence us even after they are gone.An idea that stayed with me after our conversation ended is that those who die move from standing in front of us as teachers and guides to standing behind us as part of our life force.Together we explore:• Unexpected death and the shock of loss• The space grief needs• Ancestors, life force, and legacy• Losing someone recently versus carrying a loss from many years ago• How death can awaken us to what truly matters• "I Will Show You the World" — continuing on while carrying those we have lostWhether you are grieving someone you love, supporting others through loss, or reflecting on your own relationship with life and death, I hope this conversation offers companionship, perspective, and reflection.Warmly,Iris

Please Just Hold Me - A Conversation on Family Constellations and Healing with Shavasti 30.06.2026 49хв

Episode 19: Please Just Hold Me — A Conversation on Family Constellations and Healing with ShavastiWhat do clients really want?Beneath the stories, symptoms, and questions people bring to a session, is there a deeper longing?In this conversation, Shavasti shares his view that beneath many of the concerns clients bring lives a deeper request:"Please just hold me."Together we explore what it means to be held—not fixed or changed, but deeply met in our humanity.We talk about healing sentences, love as an invitation, the role of the facilitator, and what becomes possible when we no longer have to hold everything alone.Two powerful images stayed with me long after our conversation ended: being held and falling on the sword of truth—allowing life as it is to touch and open the heart.I hope you enjoy the conversation.© 2026 You, Me & the Family Tree Podcast. All rights reserved.

Episode 18: Working with Large Groups in Family Constellation Work — with Bertold Ulsamer 17.06.2026 34хв

Episode 18: Working with Large Groups in Family Constellation Work — with Bertold UlsamerWhat changes when we move from working with individuals or small groups to facilitating a room full of people?In this conversation, Bertold Ulsamer shares reflections and practical wisdom from decades of facilitating Family Constellations in groups ranging from intimate circles to audiences of hundreds and even thousands.Together, we explore:• Preparing yourself before entering a large group• Working with nervousness and performance anxiety• Creating connection and engagement in larger groups• Working with difficult participants and strong group dynamics• The role of silence and spaciousness in facilitation• Respecting your own limits as a facilitator• The difference between seeking approval and serving the work• Why large groups may awaken old dynamics around attention, being seen, and our relationship with the motherOne idea I especially appreciated was Bertold's suggestion that what we need as facilitators can be offered to the group. If we need a moment to slow down, reconnect, or breathe, inviting the group into that experience can create connection for everyone.Whether you facilitate Family Constellations, teach, coach, lead workshops, or simply find yourself speaking in front of groups, I hope you'll find something valuable in this conversation.Website: irisconstellations.comEmail: Iris@irisconstellations.com© 2026 You, Me & the Family Tree Podcast. All rights reserved.

Adolescence — Standing Behind Our Children as They Grow with Suzi Tucker 03.06.2026 50хв

Episode 17: Adolescence — Standing Behind Our Children as They Growwith Suzi TuckerWhat does it mean to support our children without holding them back?In this conversation, Suzi Tucker and I explore adolescence as a bridge between childhood and adulthood—a time of experimentation, uncertainty, belonging, and becoming.We talk about growth as a messy and often "sloppy" process, the challenge of allowing our children to discover their own strengths and capacities, the search for belonging, and why we don't need to fully understand our adolescents in order to love them.As a mother of three teenagers, I really appreciate this conversation.Not easy to apply, but who said life is easy.I especially value the reminder that we don't need to fully understand our children in order to love them, trust them, and stand behind them as they grow.Connect with Suzi Tucker:www.suzitucker.comConnect with Iris Shaham:www.irisconstellations.com© 2026 You, Me & the Family Tree. All rights reserved.

Menopause - A Movement Toward Freedom with Suzi Tucker 20.05.2026 45хв

Episode 16: Menopause — A Movement Toward Freedomwith Suzi TuckerMenopause is a subject very close to my heart.As a woman in my fifties, I find myself living the questions that menopause brings—through the body, emotions, relationships, identity, and the changing sense of self that can emerge during this stage of life.In this conversation, I’m joined again by the wonderful Suzi Tucker—an international Family Constellations teacher, writer, and public speaker .Together, we explore menopause, a change in life.We speak about:– Menopause as a threshold and a “change of life”– Aging, visibility, beauty, and the female body– Symptoms, hot flashes, mood changes, and the nervous system– Freedom, creativity, and contribution later in life– The idea of “befriending” our symptoms rather than fighting them– Lineage and generations in Family Constellations workToward the end of the conversation, I ask Suzi:What is a good sentence for a woman in this stage of life to say to herself while looking in the mirror?Her answer:“I am grateful that I am here.”Connect with Suzi Tucker:https://www.suzitucker.comConnect with Iris Shaham:https://www.irisconstellations.com© 2026 You, Me & the Family Tree. All rights reserved.

Sitting by the River — On Time and Timing with Suzi Tucker 06.05.2026 51хв

Episode 15: Sitting by the River — On Time and Timing with Suzi TuckerTo be in accord with time—what does it mean?In this spacious conversation with Suzi Tucker—a teacher, writer, and long-time voice in the field of Family Constellations—we explore the concept of time and timing.We speak about:– The feeling of not enough time vs. the possibility of plenty– Letting time hold us, instead of trying to hold it– Timing as attunement—especially in working with others– The importance, in constellation work, of establishing with the client a sense that we have all the time in the worldSynchronicity also comes in—a quiet mystery I don’t fully understand, but trust.What is your relationship with time?Do you feel in accord with it—or is there not enough… or maybe plenty?Connect with Suzi Tucker:https://www.suzitucker.comConnect with Iris Shaham:https://www.irisconstellations.com© 2025 You, Me & the Family Tree. All rights reserved.

Supervision in Constellation Work with Bill Mannle 22.04.2026 48хв

Episode 14: Supervision in Constellation Work — with Bill MannleWhat happens when, as facilitators, we don’t know what to do?In this conversation, I’m sitting with Bill Mannle—a psychotherapist and international Family Constellations facilitator who integrates Gestalt, Family Constellations, and attachment theory in his work.We explore supervision—not as correction, but as a place where the facilitator is held.Bill shares how he came into constellation work, who he learned from, and how his path unfolded. We speak about what supervision means to him, how he offers it, and what he listens for.We also touch on the language of the body, and how much can be seen when we learn to pay attention.For me, this is a really important topic. Unlike other methods where supervision is required, here we choose it—and I believe it is crucial.We speak about:– Not knowing– The inner world of the facilitator– Blind spots– Doing our own workA question I’m still sitting with:What is it that we are really asking for when we come to supervision?You, Me & the Family Tree — A Family Constellation Podcast by Iris ShahamTo join a group or work with me:iris@irisconstellations.comConnect with Bill Mannle:https://www.billmannle.com© 2026 You, Me & the Family Tree. All rights reserved.

Rituals in Family Constellations with Bill Mannle 08.04.2026 44хв

Episode 13: Rituals in Family Constellations with Bill MannleWhat is a ritual—and when does it actually help in Family Constellation work?In this conversation, I’m joined by Bill Mannle.Bill is a psychotherapist and international Family Constellations facilitator. He integrates Gestalt, attachment theory, and systemic work in a grounded and experiential way.We begin with a simple question—what is a ritual?—and from there, something deeper unfolds.We speak about the difference between ritual and habit, how rituals help settle the body and bring people into the room, and why they can be especially supportive when working with trauma.We also explore the role of structure—beginning, middle, and end—and how this can create safety, while keeping the client in charge of their own process.Bill shares examples from his work, including the interrupted reaching movement, a “coming home” process with the younger self, and how he approaches work when there is deep trauma.This is a grounded conversation about presence, discernment, and the subtle ways we support what unfolds.I’m curious what you notice as you listen.Connect with Bill Mannle:https://www.billmannle.comConnect with Iris Shaham:https://www.irisconstellations.com© 2025 You, Me & the Family Tree. All rights reserved.

The Art of Evocative Questions with Suzi Tucker 25.03.2026 50хв

Episode 12: The Art of Evocative Questions with Suzi TuckerWhat if a question is not meant to give an answer—but to open a door?In this conversation with Suzi Tucker, we explore the art of evocative questions and the power of a good question.Suzi is a teacher, writer, and long-time voice in the field of Family Constellations, and she shares how she approaches her work as a collaboration, where the client is the guide.We speak about listening, timing, and what it means to ask from what is already present rather than from assumption or interpretation.We also touch on some of the unique questions Suzi brings into her work, like: Who sits with you at the kitchen table?, one word for your mother or father, and how old are you?—questions that don’t push for answers, but open something.Toward the end, we bring this into everyday life —how we ask our children about their day, and what helps a real connection happen.After our conversation, Suzi shared this quote from her upcoming book, Take Every Step: A Work in Progress (coming this summer), which feels very connected to what we explore here:“In the universe,there are things that are known,and things that are unknown,and in between there are doors.”— William BlakeConnect with Suzi Tucker:https://www.suzitucker.comConnect with Iris Shaham:https://www.irisconstellations.com© 2025 You, Me & the Family Tree. All rights reserved.This content may not be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted without permission.

Primary and Secondary Emotions with Suzi Tucker 11.03.2026 46хв

Episode 11: Primary and Secondary Emotions with Suzi TuckerSuzi Tucker reminds us that we are complex human beings, yet emotions are often simplified, judged, or silenced. In this episode, she explores primary emotions—those that naturally flow through us—and secondary emotions, the patterns that get stuck, circle back, or weigh us down. We also touch on the importance of letting children express their feelings, emotions in women’s cycles, and the appearance of depression.This conversation invites awareness, reflection, and holding space for yourself and others. When emotions keep repeating, it’s often a secondary feeling inviting attention.Such an important conversation! Feel free to share what came up in you.Connect with Suzi Tucker: https://www.suzitucker.comConnect with Iris Shaham: https://www.irisconstellations.com© 2025 You, Me, and the Family Tree#PrimaryEmotions #SecondaryEmotions #EmotionalAwareness #FamilyConstellations #SuziTucker #PersonalGrowth #IrisShaham #Depression

The Knowing Field with Bertold Ulsamer 25.02.2026 39хв

Episode 10: The Knowing Fieldwith Bertold UlsamerWhat is the Knowing Field — and how do we stay grounded in the presence of something we cannot fully understand?In this final episode of our five-part series with Bertold Ulsamer—author, teacher, and direct student of Bert Hellinger—we explore one of the most intriguing aspects of constellation work.Bertold reflects on why he still calls it a mystery, as Bert Hellinger did, and how the term “Knowing Field,” later introduced by Albrecht Mahr, gives language to something many facilitators experience but cannot fully explain.We dive into questions like: Is this field inside us or outside us? Do we use it—or does it use us? Toward the end, Bertold shares a powerful reflection on searching and longing: when we search for answers, teachers, or even gurus, what are we really seeking? Knowledge—or it is actually deeper longing, connected to our parents?This conversation is for therapists, facilitators, and anyone curious about what moves beyond the personal in constellation work. I hope you find it meaningful and supportive.Guest: Bertold UlsamerHost: Iris Shaham🔗 Links & ResourcesBertold UlsamerWebsite: https://www.ulsamer.com/startseite/Email: bertold.ulsamer@t-online.deDigital CourseIntegrated Trauma Therapy (facilitated by Bertold Ulsamer)https://iris-savir.systeme.io/integrated-truma-therapyBooks by Bertold UlsamerHow to Heal Old Wounds and Draw New Strengthhttps://www.amazon.com/Heal-Wounds-Draw-Strength-Constellations-ebook/dp/B0DMSNFZLVMake Peace with Your Parentshttps://www.amazon.com/Make-Peace-Your-Parents-Reconciliation/dp/B08FP9R4TKHost – Iris ShahamWebsite & Podcasts: https://www.irisconstellations.com/podcastsEmail: iris@irisconstellations.com© 2026 You, Me, and the Family Tree. All rights reserved.#FamilyConstellations#KnowingField#BertoldUlsamer#BertHellinger#SystemicConstellations#SystemicTherapy#FacilitatorDevelopment#TransgenerationalHealing#TherapeuticPresence#SearchingAndLonging

When the Facilitator Feels Lonely with Bertold Ulsamer 11.02.2026 45хв

Episode 9: When the Facilitator Feels Lonelywith Bertold UlsamerPart four of a special five-part series with Bertold Ulsamer—author, teacher, and elder in the field of Family Constellations, and a direct student of Bert Hellinger.This episode speaks to anyone who holds space for others—therapists, facilitators, teachers, guides, and helping professionals. Together, we explore the loneliness that can arise from the role, the risk of burnout, and what supports us in staying grounded, human, and present in the work.Bertold and I reflect on the inner life of the facilitator, the roots of these challenges, and how doing our own work helps us stay resilient while holding space for others.This is one of my favorite conversations, and I warmly recommend it to anyone engaged in relational, therapeutic, or facilitation work.Guest: Bertold UlsamerHost: Iris ShahamBertold UlsamerWebsite: https://www.ulsamer.com/startseite/Email: bertold.ulsamer@t-online.de2026 International Seminar (Bucharest)Men and Women – Love and Strugglehttps://bertold-ulsamer.ro/Digital CourseIntegrated Trauma Therapy (facilitated by Bertold Ulsamer)https://iris-savir.systeme.io/integrated-trma-therapyBooks by Bertold UlsamerHow to Heal Old Wounds and Draw New Strengthhttps://www.amazon.com/Heal-Wounds-Draw-Strength-Constellations-ebook/dp/B0DMSNFZLVMake Peace with Your Parentshttps://www.amazon.com/Make-Peace-Your-Parents-Reconciliation/dp/B08FP9R4TKYou, Me, and the Family TreeHost: Iris ShahamPodcast & Website: https://www.irisconstellations.com/podcastsEmail: iris@irisconstellations.com© 2025 All rights reserved.

Professional Success, Money & the Family Tree with Bertold Ulsamer 28.01.2026 43хв

Episode 8: Professional Success, Money & the Family Treewith Bertold UlsamerHave you ever wondered how much of your professional success—and your relationship with money—comes from your family system?In this episode, I’m joined by Bertold Ulsamer, author, teacher, elder in the field of Family Constellations, and a direct student of Bert Hellinger, for part three of our five-part series.We begin with professional success and allow the conversation to unfold into money, family roots, inner conflict, responsibility, and becoming an adult. Together, we explore why success can feel blocked or unconsciously sabotaged, and how constellation work supports the movement from victimhood into adulthood.You’ll also experience a guided exercise for integrating two inner voices in conflict, along with reflections on Bertold’s own professional journey.If you’re curious about the deeper systemic roots of success and money, this episode is for you.Bertold UlsamerWebsite: https://www.ulsamer.com/startseite/Email: bertold.ulsamer@t-online.de2026 International Seminar (Bucharest)Men and Women – Love and Strugglehttps://bertold-ulsamer.ro/Digital CourseIntegrated Trauma Therapy (facilitated by Bertold Ulsamer)✨ Special January discount available — reach out to me to receive the coupon codehttps://iris-savir.systeme.io/integrated-truma-therapyBooks by Bertold UlsamerProfessional Success and the Family Rootshttps://www.amazon.com/Professional-Success-Family-Roots-Constellations/dp/B085RS9N63Make Peace with Your Parentshttps://www.amazon.com/Make-Peace-Your-Parents-Reconciliation/dp/B08FP9R4TKHost – Iris ShahamPodcast & Website: https://www.irisconstellations.com/podcastsEmail: iris@irisconstellations.com

When Love Carries More Than two People with Bertold Ulsamer 14.01.2026 40хв

Episode 7: When Love Carries More Than Two People with Bertold UlsamerPart two of a special five-part series with Bertold Ulsamer, author, teacher, and elder in the field of Family Constellations, and a direct student of Bert Hellinger. In this episode, we talk about couples and relationships—what we carry from our original families, what matters when working with couples, the role of timing, different pacing between partners, relationships today and a beautiful short meditation at the end.I hope you’ll find this conversation meaningful and beneficial.Guest: Bertold UlsamerHost: Iris Shaham🔗 Links & ResourcesBertold UlsamerWebsite: https://www.ulsamer.com/startseite/Email: bertold.ulsamer@t-online.de2026 International Seminar (Bucharest)Men and Women – Love and Struggle https://bertold-ulsamer.ro/Digital Course Integrated Trauma Therapy (facilitated by Bertold Ulsamer)Special January discount availablehttps://iris-savir.systeme.io/integrated-truma-therapyBook The Art and Practice of Family Constellations:Leading Family Constellations as Developed by Bert Hellingerhttps://a.co/d/fy5GLRVHost – Iris ShahamPodcast & Website: https://www.irisconstellations.com/podcastsEmail: iris@irisconstellations.com© 2025 You, Me, and the Family Tree. All rights reserved.#FamilyConstellations#BertoldUlsamer#Couples#Relationships#SystemicTherapy#AncestralHealing#LoveAndRelationships#IrisShaham

Meeting Dr. Bertold Ulsamer 31.12.2025 39хв

Episode 6: This episode opens a special 5-part series with Bertold Ulsamer — author, teacher, and elder in the field of Family Constellations. A direct student of Bert Hellinger, Bertold is a world-renowned scholar and practitioner whose work has helped shape the field internationally.In this opening episode, I had the pleasure of sitting down with Bertold for an open conversation about stations of his life journey and how he was found by constellation work, as he himself describes it. We speak about the experiences through which the work entered his life, how it began to guide him, and what has continued to orient his path over the years.I truly hope you’ll find this conversation meaningful and beneficial.Contact & ResourcesBertold Ulsamer Email: bertold.ulsamer@t-online.deWebsite: https://www.ulsamer.com/startseite/2026 International Seminar (Bucharest)Men and Women – Love and Struggle: https://bertold-ulsamer.ro/Digital Course: Integrated Trauma Therapy (facilitated by Bertold Ulsamer): https://iris-savir.systeme.io/integrated-truma-therapyBook The Art and Practice of Family Constellations:Leading Family Constellations as Developed by Bert Hellinger: https://a.co/d/fy5GLRVHost: Iris ShahamWebsite: https://www.irisconstellations.com/Email: iris@irisconstellations.com© 2025 You, Me, and the Family Tree. All rights reserved.

HOME with Suzi Tucker 17.12.2025 57хв

Episode 5: HOME with Suzi Tucker.Welcome to the fifth episode of our special 5-part series with Suzi Tucker, author, teacher, and one of the most influential voices in the world of Family Constellations.In our fifth and final conversation for this round, we explore the theme of home — not just as a place, but as a deep sense of belonging. What does it mean to come home to ourselves, to others, and to life itself?Enjoy listening — I would love to hear from you, what is home for you, where do you feel at home, and anything else you would like to share.Connect with Suzi Tucker:https://www.suzitucker.comConnect with Iris Shaham:https://www.irisconstellations.com© 2025 You, Me, and the Family Tree. All rights reserved.

Language with Suzi Tucker 03.12.2025 51хв

Welcome to the fourth episode of our special 5-part series with Suzi Tucker, author, teacher, and one of the most influential voices in the world of Family Constellations. Today we dive into the profound role of language — how we speak, how we listen, and how our words shape what unfolds in the constellation field.This episode is especially valuable for:• Family Constellation facilitators• Therapists and counselors• Group leaders of any kind• Anyone curious about deepening their presence and clarity.Suzi shares practical insights on:Hosting groups and working without judgment You’ll also hear a lovely short story about Suzi’s contribution to one of Bert Hellinger’s books.Enjoy listening — and I’d love for you to share your own family phrase — that special saying or line that’s unique to your family.Connect with Suzi Tucker:https://www.suzitucker.comMessengers of Healing book: https://www.amazon.com/Messengers-Hea...Connect with Iris Shaham:https://www.irisconstellations.com© 2025 You, Me, and the Family Tree. All rights reserved.

The Five Elements That Appear in Every Life Story 19.11.2025 1год 1хв

This is a special 5 episodes' series with Suzi Tucker, author, teacher, and a true pioneer in Family Constellations.In this third episode, I sit down with Suzi to explore the five elements that appear in our lives.This is one of my favorite episodes — we explore the elements, core fears, and I share a personal story from growing up in a kibbutz.This episode is an invitation to reflect on your own life story and notice what resonates with you. Feel welcomed to share.Don’t forget to watch Episodes 1 and 2 if you missed them.Contact Suzi Tucker:⁠Suzi Website⁠⁠Contact Iris Shaham:⁠Iris Website© 2025 You, Me, and the Family Tree. All rights reserved.

Acknowledge What Is with Suzi Tucker 12.11.2025 54хв

This is a special 5-episode series with Suzi Tucker, author, teacher, and a true pioneer in Family Constellations.In this second episode, we explore what it truly means to acknowledge what is — not to fix, not to escape, but to meet reality exactly as it is. This is one of the more challenging conversations in our series, a profound dialogue that invites you to slow down, breathe, and listen fully.Before diving into the heart of the topic, Suzi shares the story of how she met Bert Hellinger, founder of Family Constellations.A gentle exploration of mindfulness, awareness, and the quiet strength of seeing things as they are. This episode is deep and thought-provoking, best listened to when you have time to sit with it fully.Enjoy!© 2025 You, Me, and the Family Tree. All rights reserved.Contact Suzi Tucker:⁠Suzi Website⁠The Gather Enough Fireflies BookContact Iris Shaham:⁠Iris Website

Decision Making with Suzi Tucker 26.10.2025 42хв

This is a special 5 episodes' series with Suzi Tucker, author, teacher, and a true pioneer in Family Constellations.In this opening episode, I sit down with Suzi to explore the intricate process of decision making through the lens of family systems. Together, we reflect on how our choices are often shaped by unseen loyalties, inherited patterns, and the deep connections that bind us to our family stories.This conversation is an invitation to pause and ask yourself: What part of your decision-making truly belongs to you — and what might you be carrying for someone else?I truly hope you’ll find it meaningful and beneficial!© 2025 You, Me, and the Family Tree. All rights reserved.Contact Suzi Tucker:Suzi WebsiteThe Gather Enough Fireflies BookI recommend you to hear this beautiful exercise with Suzi: Finding Context for Your IssueContact Iris Shaham:Iris Website