The Elegant Warrior with Heather Hansen

Epizode

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  356: The Real Secret to Ultimate Charisma 09.03.2026 13min

  In today's episode, Heather shares a powerful and counterintuitive truth about charisma. It is not rooted in self confidence, body language, or perfect delivery. It begins with your belief in the people in front of you. Whether you are leading a team, persuading a jury, navigating a difficult conversation, or presenting on stage, your energy communicates what you truly believe. And people feel it. Drawing on her experience as a trial attorney and leadership coach, Heather explains why setting a high goal and expressing authentic confidence that others can achieve it is one of the most transformational communication shifts you can make. If you want to be more influential, more persuasive, and more magnetic in your leadership, this episode gives you a practical tool you can use immediately. In this episode, you will learn: Why Confidence in Others Creates Charisma How belief in your audience, jury, or team shapes your tone, energy, and results. Two Charismatic Leadership Tactics That Change Everything Why setting a high goal and communicating confidence in others builds influence. Lessons from the Courtroom How believing a jury could understand complex medical evidence transformed both delivery and outcomes. Why Doubt Is Detectable How hesitation and skepticism leak into your communication and undermine trust. The Tool of Playing with Evidence How to intentionally build belief by collecting and creating evidence. Collecting Evidence Why looking at past successes, mentors, and historical examples strengthens conviction. Creating Evidence How breaking big goals into smaller milestones builds momentum and proof. The Reciprocity Principle Why liking, trusting, and believing in people often leads them to respond in kind. Why Charisma Is Not Performance How shifting focus from yourself to others elevates your presence naturally. In this episode:   Resources and Links: 📚Learn more about Charismatic Leadership Tactics from Dr. John Antonakis 🎙️Listen to Heather's previous episode featuring Dr. Antonakis Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Follow Heather on Facebook Connect with Heather on LinkedIn Website   Watch Episodes on Youtube  Heather's TikTok ‍  heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  355: These 2 Words Help You To Be Understood 02.03.2026 16min

  In today's episode, Heather shares one of the 12 proven tools for increasing charisma and mastering difficult conversations and it comes down to just two words: it's like. While storytelling has dominated the communication world for years, Heather explains why metaphor can be even more powerful. Stories take time. Metaphors create instant clarity. By comparing something unfamiliar to something your audience already understands, you not only become more charismatic, you become unforgettable. Through courtroom examples, coaching breakthroughs, and practical exercises, Heather shows how metaphor builds connection, increases inspiration, and helps you avoid the number one fear in communication: being misunderstood. If you want to feel more confident, persuasive, and impactful in negotiations, feedback conversations, presentations, or high-stakes moments, this episode gives you a tool you can use immediately.       In this episode, you'll learn: Why Metaphor Beats Storytelling in Many Situations How stories require time and structure, but metaphors create immediate understanding. The Two Words That Increase Charisma Why saying "it's like" instantly makes your message clearer and more compelling. How Metaphor Prevents Misunderstanding Why comparing the unknown to the known helps your audience grasp complex ideas quickly. A Courtroom Example That Changed Everything How a surgeon compared knee cartilage to tire tread and helped a jury truly understand. The Coaching Breakthrough Why cleaning cabinets instead of floors perfectly illustrated client expectations and created an aha moment. Two Simple Questions to Generate Metaphors How asking "What's it like?" or "How is it like something my audience understands?" unlocks powerful comparisons. Cultural Awareness in Communication Why metaphors only work when your audience shares the reference point. Why Metaphors Make You Memorable How concise comparisons stick longer than long stories.       In this episode: [00:00] Why communication tools create real excitement [01:24] The 12 proven charisma tools and where metaphor fits [03:00] The power of "it's like" [04:00] Simple examples of everyday metaphors [06:07] The surgeon who explained knees like tire tread [08:32] The cleaning floors versus cabinets breakthrough [10:50] Two practical ways to create metaphors [12:00] Cultural awareness and testing your comparisons [13:30] Why metaphor is more memorable than story [15:17] Preview of next week's charisma tool Resources and Links: 📘 Book: I Never Metaphor I Didn't Like A playful collection of metaphors to help you see comparisons everywhere and strengthen your communication.     Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Follow Heather on Facebook Connect with Heather on LinkedIn Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  354: One Sentence to Help You Face Difficult Conversations 16.02.2026 13min

  In today's episode, Heather shares the one sentence that will get you to show up for high-stake conversations, even when you absolutely don't want to. While mindset and emotional management are powerful, some conversations - like receiving tough feedback or facing a dreaded interview - can't be thought or felt out of. Sometimes, the only answer is a simple mantra: Do it anyway. Drawing from her diverse background as a trial attorney, psychology major, and certified hypnotist, Heather explains why acting in spite of dread is the ultimate secret sauce to communication. This episode is a deep dive into the power of evidence and why "doing it anyway" is a win for your personal growth, regardless of the conversation's outcome. Together, we explore how to collect and create evidence that supports your dreams and how to prove to yourself that you are capable of far more than your feelings suggest.     In this episode, you'll learn: The Power of "Do It Anyway": Why this simple sentence is the key to breaking through the avoidance of difficult conversations. The Evidence Secret Sauce: How collecting and creating evidence makes you more persuasive, influential, and charismatic. Evidence You Can Do Hard Things: How pushing through a dreaded talk provides lasting proof of your own resilience. Why Feelings Aren't Fatal: A reminder that emotions like embarrassment, fear, or boredom are survivable and don't have to dictate your actions. The Trap of the "Soft Life": Why letting your feelings hold you back can prevent you from achieving your goals in 2026. Dismantling the "Difficult" Myth: How doing the hard thing often reveals that the conversation wasn't as difficult as you imagined.     In this episode:  00:00 Welcome & Introduction to High-Stakes Conversations 02:10 Episode Theme: The Mantra "Do It Anyway" 03:55 The Role of Evidence in Personal Growth 05:00 Evidence #1: You Can Do Hard Things 03:26 Evidence #2: Feelings Aren't Fatal 10:01 Evidence #3: It Might Not Be That Hard 11:33 Tool for Today: Use Evidence to Support Your Dreams 12:24 Preview of next week's episode       Resources and Links: 📘 Book: Advocate to Win by Heather Hansen – Master the tools of a trial lawyer to advocate for your own goals and dreams.   🎧Podcast Interview: How Heather uses the Evidence Journal to build self-belief   🎥Cindy Brady Freezes on Live Television Heather uses this as an example of how "feelings aren't fatal"-even intense embarrassment like Cindy's can be survived.   Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Follow Heather on Facebook Connect with Heather on LinkedIn Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  353: 3 Ways to Manage Your Emotions for High-Stakes Conversations 09.02.2026 15min

  Ever feel your heart race or your voice shake the moment you need to ask for a raise, set a boundary, or give tough feedback? High-stakes conversations don't have to be high-stress battles. In this episode, communication expert Heather shares three powerful tools to help you master your emotions and handle "difficult" conversations with clarity and calm. You'll learn how to shift your mindset from "combat" to "collaboration" using the BEAR technique - understanding how your beliefs lead to your energy, actions, and results. Heather breaks down how to stop viewing others as enemies and how to use a simple linguistic trick used by top athletes to stay objective under pressure. Whether you are navigating workplace confidence or strengthening personal relationships, these tools will help you advocate for yourself with charisma and ease.     ✨ In this video, you'll learn how to: Define what advocating really means. Break down your goals into actionable, strategic steps. Overcome fear and guilt about wanting more at work. Identify the right people to ask for opportunities or resources. Strengthen your confidence by following through on your commitments.     💡 Heather introduces three core tools you can use immediately: Persuade yourself to believe something different: Use the "ladder of beliefs" to shift from fear to opportunity without gaslighting yourself. Be A.G.I.L.E.: Learn to "Assume Good Intentions, Love Everyone" to change your energy and get better results. Practice Illeism: Use the psychological power of speaking about yourself in the third person to remove emotional triggers.         🕒 Chapters:  00:00 Introduction: Handling emotions in high-stakes conversations 01:23 The BEAR framework: beliefs, energy, actions, results 02:00 Tool #1: Persuade yourself to believe something different 03:05 Using a ladder of beliefs (without gaslighting yourself) 04:18 Collecting vs. creating evidence for new beliefs 05:31 Tool #2: Be agile - assume good intentions, love everyone 06:28 Seeing others as teammates, not enemies 09:39 Tool #3: Illeism - speaking about yourself in the third person 12:08 Recap: the three tools for emotional control 13:08 What's coming next + listener invitation     📝Related Resources: 📘 Book: Advocate to Win by Heather Hansen https://www.amazon.com/Advocate-Win-Tools-What-Want/dp/1642936634  🧠 Book: Chatter by Ethan Kross https://www.amazon.com/Chatter-Voice-Head-Matters-Harness/dp/0525575235 📗Book: Shift: Managing Your Emotions--So They Don't Manage You by Ethan Kross https://www.amazon.com/Shift-Managing-Your-Emotions-So-Manage/dp/B0D5YZ42FL/      💬 Join the Conversation: Which of these three tools do you need most for your next big meeting? Let us know in the comments!     👍 If this video helped you: Like it to support the channel Subscribe for more communication tips and high-stakes conversation strategies Share it with a friend who is preparing for a difficult talk     SEO Keywords: self advocacy at work, communication skills, workplace confidence, how to speak up at work, career growth, advocate for yourself, difficult conversations, negotiation skills, personal development, Heather Hansen, Elegant Warrior Podcast.       Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather  https://www.beliefbuilders.com/contact  Follow Heather on Instagram  https://www.instagram.com/anelegantwarrior/  Website  https://www.beliefbuilders.com/  Watch Episodes on Youtube https://www.youtube.com/@Beliefbuildersacademy  Heather's TikTok ‍https://www.tiktok.com/@theelegantwarrior?_t=8oq50EMkKPG&_r=1  heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  352: Three Tools for Mastering "Difficult" Conversations 02.02.2026 20min

  In today's episode of The Elegant Warrior, Heather breaks down why "difficult conversations" are only difficult if you believe they are. Whether you're giving or receiving feedback, negotiating a raise, setting a boundary, or asking for help, Heather shares three practical tools to help you prepare mentally, emotionally, and strategically. Drawing from her experience as a trial attorney, communication expert, and advocate, Heather explains how your beliefs shape your energy, your actions, and ultimately your results. You'll learn how to reframe the story you're telling yourself, calm your nervous system when fight, flight, freeze, or fawn shows up, and recognize when argument helps and when it hurts. This episode is a grounded, actionable guide to approaching high-stakes conversations with more confidence, calm, and clarity.     In this episode, you'll learn: Why "difficult" is just a story How your belief about a conversation determines your energy, behavior, and outcome. The BEAR framework How belief leads to energy, energy leads to action, and action leads to results. How to test your story Why changing the narrative in your head can immediately change how your body responds. Mothering the animal of your body How to work with your nervous system instead of fighting it when stress shows up. The three Bs for calming your nervous system Breathing, binding, and bending to signal safety and control. Fight, flight, freeze, and fawn How these instinctive responses show up in conversations like negotiations and feedback. When argument is the wrong tool Why arguing rarely works when the other person is the decision maker. A grounding mantra for high-stakes moments A simple phrase to calm your subconscious and help you choose presence over fear.     In this episode: 00:00 – Introduction & Evolution of the Podcast 04:00 – Preparing for High-Stakes Conversations 04:30 – Tool 1: Test Your Story 08:24 – Tool 2: Mothering the Animal 09:47 – The Three B's: Breathe, Bind, and Extend 14:28 – Tool 3: Know When to Argue 17:15 – Summary of the Three Tools 18:21 – Tool For Today (TT): Affirmation Mantra 20:12 – Conclusion & Closing Remarks     Resources and Links: 📘 Book: Advocate to Win by Heather HansenLearn how to persuade, influence, and communicate effectively in high-stakes situations. 🎧 Grace Smith, Clinical Hypnotherapist Learn more about hypnosis, subconscious calming techniques, and the mantra shared in these videos. Learn more about Grace Smith at her official website: gracesmith.com   Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Follow Heather on Facebook Connect with Heather on LinkedIn Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  351: Your Playlist, Your Enneagram, and Your Wisdom with Susan Drumm 19.01.2026 31min

  In this episode of The Elegant Warrior, Heather welcomes leadership expert Susan Drumm to explore how music, neuroscience, and the Enneagram can transform your leadership and your life. Susan shares her fascinating journey from Harvard Law School to consulting, television, acting, and ultimately leadership development, showing how following intuition and curiosity can lead to extraordinary growth. Together, Heather and Susan dive into practical tools for recognizing patterns, disrupting limiting behaviors, and building new mental "playlists" that support empowerment, confidence, and personal growth. Whether you're a leader, an entrepreneur, or someone looking to level up your self-awareness, this episode provides actionable strategies grounded in research, neuroscience, and Susan's decades of experience.     In this episode, you'll learn: How Susan's background in law, consulting, and acting shaped her approach to leadership development The concept of "old playlists" vs. "new playlists" and how music rewires your brain for growth How to identify your belief statements and practice being in an empowered state What the Enneagram reveals about your blind spots, superpowers, and path to growth Tools to apply both music and the Enneagram for leadership, personal development, and team success     In this episode: 00:00 Welcome and Susan's journey from Harvard Law to consulting 02:08 Why the "sweatshop" law firm model didn't fit Susan's personality 06:41 Experiences at NBC: Learning the importance of organizational culture 08:42 Pivoting to acting: Developing empathy and mastering the inner critic 11:41 Pattern recognition and the concept behind The Leader's Playlist 13:46 Neuroscience: How music rewires neural pathways and shifts mental states 17:20 Practical steps: Creating your empowered "I am" playlist 21:19 Introduction to the Enneagram: Nine leadership styles and blind spots 24:45 Why accurate assessments matter and the "Enneagram Applied" program 26:21 Breaking down Enneagram Type 3 (The Achiever) and Type 7 (The Visionary) 30:11 Free quiz: Your Leadership, Superpower, and Roadblocks       Resources and Links: 📘 The Leaders Playlist by Susan Drumm – Explore music, neuroscience, and leadership. 🎯 Free Quiz: Leadership Superpower & Roadblock Assessment🌐 Susan Drumm - Website   Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Follow Heather on Facebook Connect with Heather on LinkedIn Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com   The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  350: What is Motivational Interviewing and Why Should I Care? With Kim Bisset 12.01.2026 33min

  In today's episode, Heather sits down with Kim Bisset to explore Motivational Interviewing and why it is such a powerful tool for communication, leadership, coaching, and advocacy. Rather than relying on pressure, persuasion, or fixing, Motivational Interviewing focuses on curiosity, collaboration, and helping people uncover their own reasons for change. Drawing from Kim's expertise and Heather's background in law, coaching, and healthcare communication, this conversation breaks down what Motivational Interviewing really is, what it is not, and why it works so well in high stakes conversations. Whether you are leading a team, working with clients, parenting, coaching, or advocating for yourself, this episode shows how changing the way you ask questions can change outcomes. Together, Heather and Kim unpack how Motivational Interviewing builds trust, reduces resistance, and helps people move forward without feeling pushed or judged.     In this episode, you'll learn: What Motivational Interviewing Actually Is A clear explanation of the principles behind Motivational Interviewing and why it is more effective than telling people what to do. Why People Resist Change How resistance is often a signal of miscommunication, not stubbornness. The Power of Autonomy Why people are more likely to change when they feel heard, respected, and in control of their choices. Asking Better Questions How open ended questions invite insight, reflection, and ownership. Listening for Change Talk How to recognize the language that signals readiness for growth and how to respond to it. Motivational Interviewing in Real Life How these tools apply in leadership, healthcare, law, coaching, parenting, and everyday conversations. Why This Skill Matters More Than Ever How compassion based communication creates better outcomes in a world full of pressure and noise.     In this episode: 00:00 Introduction to Motivational Interviewing and inner wisdom 02:25 What Motivational Interviewing is and how Kim discovered it 04:15 How MI is used in real-world work with youth and communities 06:05 Why telling people what to do often shuts them down 08:20 When Motivational Interviewing works best and why it's effective 09:55 Understanding ambivalence and mixed motivations 12:10 Finding the reasons behind behavior and change 14:20 Change language, sustain language, and emotional motivation 15:55 The spirit of Motivational Interviewing: belief, compassion, and autonomy 18:20 OARS explained: Open-ended questions, Affirmations, Reflections, Summaries 21:10 Why specificity and affirmations build trust and confidence 24:10 Helping people feel seen, heard, and understood 27:45 Reflections and summaries as powerful communication tools 29:40 Is Motivational Interviewing manipulative? Addressing misconceptions 31:05 Where to find trained Motivational Interviewing practitioners 33:10 Final thoughts on conversations that empower change     Resources and Links: 📘 Motivational Interviewing Book: Helping People Change by William R. Miller and Stephen Rollnick Learn the foundational framework behind Motivational Interviewing and why it works. 🧠 Motivational Interviewing Network of Trainers (MINT) Explore training resources, research, and best practices for Motivational Interviewing. 🌐 Connect with Kim Bisset - Website  Learn more about Kim's work, training, and approach to compassionate communication. Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Follow Heather on Facebook Connect with Heather on LinkedIn Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  349: Does Thought Beat Action? Manifesting, Preparing and Acting for 2026 05.01.2026 27min

  In today's episode, Heather challenges one of the most popular beliefs in personal development: that mindset alone creates change. While visualization, manifestation, and positive thinking all have value, Heather explains why none of them work without action. Joined by frequent guest Judge Rosemarie Aquilina, Heather explores how thinking, dreaming, preparing, and acting each play a role in real transformation and why action is ultimately what creates momentum. Together, they unpack the limits of visualization and manifestation when they are not paired with effort, practice, and follow through. Drawing from personal stories of writing books, building careers, preparing for court, and navigating big life transitions, Heather and Judge Aquilina show how confidence, clarity, and growth are built through doing, not just thinking. This episode is a thoughtful and practical guide for anyone entering 2026 feeling stuck in their head, overwhelmed by goals, or unsure which next step to take. Whether you are a planner, a dreamer, or someone who thrives on action, this conversation will help you understand yourself better and move forward with intention.     In this episode, you'll learn: Why action creates the evidence that builds confidence and belief How overthinking can quietly block progress even when intentions are good The difference between dreaming as motivation and dreaming as avoidance Why preparation is an action, not just a mental exercise How the WOOP framework helps turn intention into execution Why small actions matter more than perfect plans How creativity and thinking outside the box support meaningful action What it really takes to prepare for high stakes conversations and decisions How patience, consistency, and effort compound over time     In this episode: [00:00] Why this conversation matters heading into 2026 [01:16] Action versus thinking and why it is not an either or debate [03:41] The real obstacle most people face when taking action [06:00] Visualizing outcomes versus feeling pride and confidence [07:30] Effort, talent, and the role of grit in achievement [10:42] Manifestation, karma, and why action creates results [13:09] Different paths to success and knowing what works for you [15:34] Impatience, shiny distractions, and staying committed [17:53] Why preparation builds confidence in high pressure situations [20:14] Thinking, planning, and practicing as forms of action [22:34] Using if then planning to stay grounded and consistent [24:49] Creativity in action, leadership, and problem solving [26:40] Final advice for setting goals and moving forward in 2026       Resources and Links: 📖 Book: Rethinking Positive Thinking by Gabriele Oettingen 📖 Book: Grit by Angela Duckworth 📖 Book: The War of Art by Steven Pressfield 🧠 WOOP Method 🌐 Follow Judge Rosemarie Aquilina – Website   Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Follow Heather on Facebook Connect with Heather on LinkedIn Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com  
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  348: THIS is Way More Important Than Mindset! Why Action Matters More Than Intention 29.12.2025 19min

  In today's episode, Heather challenges one of the most popular ideas in personal development: that mindset alone creates change. While visualization, manifestation, and positive thinking all have value, she explains why none of them work without action. Drawing from her own journey with weight loss, running marathons, writing books, and building a career in advocacy and communication, Heather shows how real transformation only happens when thinking turns into doing. Backed by research, neuroscience, and practical tools, this episode is a powerful reminder that intention without action keeps you stuck, while action creates momentum. Together, we explore why your subconscious rewards necessity, how overthinking can sabotage progress, and how a simple framework can help you turn goals into results.     In this episode, you'll learn: Why Action Beats Mindset Alone How visualizing success without acting can actually reduce motivation and delay progress. The Hidden Trap of Positive Thinking What research reveals about why imagining success can trick your brain into believing the work is already done. Action Creates Necessity Why the subconscious mind responds to what feels necessary, not what feels optional. The WOOP Framework How Wish, Outcome, Obstacle, and Plan help bridge the gap between intention and execution. Why Inner Obstacles Matter More Than Outer Ones How identifying your own habits and distractions gives you back control. From Thinking to Doing Why preparation, practice, and repetition are the real keys to confidence and performance. Choosing Action as a Way of Life How adopting action as a guiding principle can change the way you approach goals, work, and growth.       In this episode: [00:00] Why this is not a rerun and why action matters right now [01:12] Heather's weight loss story and why visualization alone did nothing [03:32] The danger of thinking too much and acting too little [05:57] Research on positive thinking and why it can backfire [07:30] How the subconscious rewards necessity [08:19] Introducing the WOOP method [10:36] Turning obstacles into action plans [12:48] Why communication and confidence require practice, not thought [15:16] Choosing act as a word for the year [17:33] Why 2026 is about momentum and movement [19:40] Action as the foundation of advocacy, growth, and change     Resources and Links: 📘 Book: Rethinking Positive Thinking by Gabriele OettingenExplore the research behind why positive thinking alone can hinder success and how to use mental contrasting effectively. 🧠 WOOP Method Learn more about the Wish, Outcome, Obstacle, Plan framework and how to apply it to your goals. 🎥 Heather Hansen TEDx Talk on empathy and perspectiveWatch Heather's TEDx talk on seeing situations differently and why perspective shapes action.   Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Follow Heather on Facebook Connect with Heather on LinkedIn Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  347: Unfolded - How to Believe in Yourself and Your Ability to Fly 22.12.2025 34min

  In today's episode, Heather welcomes authors, leadership consultants, and husband and wife team Dr. Linda Schubring and Brian Schubring to explore the deeper meaning of identity, transformation, and trusting your inner map. Together, they discuss their bestselling book Unfolded: Lessons in Transformation from an Origami Crane, a powerful allegory that invites readers to rediscover their inner wisdom and reshape how they show up in the world. Through stories of leadership coaching, personal reflection, and creative collaboration, Heather, Linda, and Brian unpack how uncertainty, change, and self doubt can become catalysts for growth. This conversation is a reminder that your experiences have already shaped the map you need, and that unfolding your potential is both an internal journey and a shared one.     In this episode, you'll learn: Why the Map Is Already Inside You How your past experiences hold the answers for where you are meant to go next. Transformation Is a Choice Why the shape you are in today does not have to be the shape you stay in. The Power of Community in Growth How different voices, including critical ones, help shape who we become. Reflection and Action Must Coexist Why introspection without action leads to paralysis and action without reflection leads to burnout. Creating a Practice That Is Truly Yours How journaling, meditation, and reflection work best when tailored to your own needs. Navigating Noise and Distraction Why stepping away from constant external input helps you reconnect with your inner voice. Wisdom Across Generations How mentors, inner dialogue, and lived experience guide transformation at every stage of life.     In this episode: [00:00] Introducing Dr. Linda and Brian Schubring and their book Unfolded [02:00] The origin story behind the origami crane allegory [04:18] Anchoring certainty within during times of uncertainty [06:37] Agency, reshaping identity, and choosing how you show up [08:57] The role of community, inner voices, and leadership teams [11:19] Reflection versus action and why both matter [13:40] Meditation, journaling, and intentional pauses [18:14] Listening to your inner voice amid constant noise [22:55] Wisdom, mentors, and being the owl for others [27:36] Writing together, creative process, and collaboration [33:31] A closing meditation on trust, courage, and taking flight     Resources and Links: 📘 Book: Unfolded: Lessons in Transformation from an Origami CraneDiscover a powerful allegory about identity, growth, and transformation. 🌐 Website: Leadership Vision ConsultingLearn more about Dr. Linda Schubring and Brian Schubring's leadership and organizational work.   Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Follow Heather on Facebook Connect with Heather on LinkedIn Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com   The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  346: The New Power Pose-and How to Use It to Win 11.12.2025 15min

  In today's episode, Heather invites you to rethink everything you've been taught about power poses, confidence, and presence. While the classic "hands-on-hips" stance is often linked to authority, this episode reveals a far more effective and far more compassionate power move: simply sitting down. Drawing from real experiences in leadership, advocacy, and high-stakes conversations, Heather shares how lowering yourself to someone else's level can transform interactions, build trust, and leave a lasting impact. From courtroom moments to everyday leadership lessons, you'll see why compassion, presence, and perspective are the true sources of personal power. Together, we explore why power doesn't require taking up more space, sometimes it is found in offering space to others.       In this episode, you'll learn: The Real Power in Sitting Down Why sitting communicates presence, compassion, and connection more effectively than traditional "power poses." Compassion as a Leadership Superpower How compassion strengthens advocacy, relationships, and influence, and why people feel safer when you're willing to sit with them. The Psychology of Being at Eye Level How leveling the physical playing field changes energy, reduces intimidation, and allows genuine dialogue. Lessons from the Courtroom What a malpractice case taught Heather Hansen about human connection, and why a simple act like sitting on a patient's bed moved an entire jury. A Story Heather Hansen Never Forgot The emotional impact of a colleague and how 18 minutes of presence can change a life. Empathy vs. Compassion The difference between feeling what others feel and seeing what they see, and why action is what matters most. Why Slowing Down is the New Power Move In a world obsessed with speed, volume, and "looking powerful," Heather Hansen explains why slowing down, sitting down, and connecting deeply are the traits that build true charisma.       In this episode: [00:00] Rethinking the classic power pose [01:10] Why the "stand big" approach isn't always effective [02:20] Compassion research in healthcare [03:17] A malpractice case and the power of sitting at the bedside [04:50] How sitting changes difficult conversations at work [05:39] The psychology of being on the same level [07:30] Joanne's story and the impact of presence [10:14] Compassion as the foundation of advocacy [12:40] Cognitive vs. affective empathy [14:30] Why sitting is the new power pose [15:08] How presence builds confidence and charisma       Resources and Links: 🎥 Heather Hansen TEDx Talk on empathy and perspective    Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Follow Heather on Facebook Connect with Heather on LinkedIn Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com  
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  345: How to Avoid Being Scammed by AI, Other, and Yourself 04.12.2025 24min

  In today's episode, Heather Hansen breaks down one of the most important skills we all need in a world shaped by rapid information, social media trends, artificial intelligence, and constant noise: the ability to avoid being fooled, misled, or scammed. As a trial attorney who spent decades cross-examining witnesses and uncovering the truth, Heather Hansen shares a simple but powerful four-part process you can use to stay discerning, think critically, and protect yourself from false ideas, misleading content, and even your own unexamined thoughts. Whether it is viral AI clips, trending online statistics, persuasive pitches, or the limiting beliefs in your own mind, Heather Hansen teaches you how to slow down, investigate, and choose what to believe with intention.     In this episode, you'll learn: Why We Get Fooled So Easily How speed, distraction, and overstimulation make us more vulnerable than ever to scams and misinformation. The PITS Process for Discernment Pause, Is this true, Take the other side, and Settle into how it feels. Heather explains each step in detail and how to apply it in real time. How to Consider the Source Why credentials, familiarity, and authority figures can trick you into believing something without questioning it. How to Take the Other Side The trial-lawyer technique that helps you evaluate any claim or belief by arguing the opposite and gathering evidence for both perspectives. How to Stop Scamming Yourself Why your own thoughts often fool you more than outside influences and how to challenge internal stories like "I'm too old" or "I should wait." Real Examples from Everyday Life From AI-generated TikTok videos to misleading job-loss statistics to high-profile investment fraud, Heather shows how the PITS method exposes the truth.     In this episode: [00:00] Heather Hansen on Thanksgiving, life updates, and the importance of discernment [00:55] Why avoiding scams and misinformation matters more than ever [03:17] The PITS process and how to use it [05:35] Step 1: Pause and consider the source [07:59] Step 2: Ask "Is this true" and why truth is rarely simple [08:45] Step 3: Take the other side and gather opposing evidence [10:21] A real-world example involving misleading workforce statistics [12:46] How the PITS process applies to viral AI content [15:09] Why credentials do not equal credibility [17:29] How investors could have avoided the Theranos debacle [19:53] Using the PITS process on your own thoughts and limiting beliefs [22:18] The benefits of starting before you feel ready [23:50] How discernment improves confidence, advocacy, and decision-making     Resources and Links: 📖 Book: Loving What Is by Byron KatieExplore The Work, a method for questioning stressful thoughts. 📖 Book: Compassionomics by Dr. Stephen Trzeciak and Dr. Anthony MazzarelliDiscover the science behind why compassion improves outcomes. 📖 Book: Wonder Drug by Dr. Stephen Trzeciak and Dr. Anthony MazzarelliLearn seven research-backed ways serving others benefits your health and well-being.   Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Follow Heather on Facebook Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  344: How to Show Compassion 20.11.2025 22min

  In today's episode, Heather Hansen explores one of the most powerful tools we have for connection, credibility, and healing: compassion. Drawing from research, courtroom experience, and two decades defending healthcare providers, Heather Hansen breaks down the real meaning of compassion and the specific actions that genuinely make people feel seen, heard, and supported. She also shares new insights from recent medical research on how compassion improves patient outcomes, reduces burnout for healthcare providers, and strengthens every relationship in your life. Whether you are a leader, parent, partner, clinician, or friend, these eight proven behaviors can transform the way you communicate and connect.     In this episode, you'll learn: The Real Definition of Compassion – Why it is not about suffering with others, but about recognizing their struggle and taking action to relieve it. Eight Proven Compassion Behaviors – The research-backed actions that make people feel understood, respected, and supported. Why Tone Matters – How the way you speak communicates your energy and becomes a key sign of compassion. The Power of Nonjudgment – How dropping judgment makes people more open, honest, and trusting. Gender and Race Differences in Compassion Needs – What research shows women and people of color uniquely identify as compassionate behavior. Everyday Compassion – How to apply these actions at home, at work, and in your community to create meaningful change.     In this episode: [00:00] Heather Hansen on being an Elegant Warrior and embracing life's challenges [02:00] Why compassion is one of the three pillars of credibility, compassion, and charisma [04:47] How compassion affects patient outcomes and healthcare burnout [07:10] The eight behaviors that signal compassion in medical research [09:34] Listening carefully and taking concerns seriously [11:59] Eye contact, presence, tone, and nonjudgment [14:09] Why the least judgmental people are the most trusted [16:36] Responding to opportunities to show compassion [18:30] What women uniquely perceive as compassionate [19:03] What people of color identify as signs of respect and compassion [21:26] How to create a ripple effect of compassion in your daily life     Resources and Links: 📘 Book: Compassionomics by Dr. Stephen Trzeciak and Dr. Anthony Mazzarelli 📘 Book: Wonder Drug by Dr. Stephen Trzeciak and Dr. Anthony Mazzarelli   Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Follow Heather on Facebook Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com  
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  343: Speak Up with Judge Rosemarie Aquilina 06.11.2025 28min

  In today's episode, Heather Hansen sits down with her good friend and returning guest, Judge Rosemarie Aquilina, Michigan judge, author, and trailblazer best known for presiding over the Larry Nassar USA Gymnastics case. Together, they dive into Judge Aquilina's newest book, Speak Up: Lessons in Trusting Your Instincts, and unpack what it truly means to embrace your voice, conquer fear, and stand in your self-worth. Drawing from her decades on the bench, her time in the military, and her role as a mentor for women, Rosemarie shares how we can turn fear into fuel, failure into wisdom, and change into growth.     In this episode, you'll learn: The Power of Fear – Why fear isn't something to eliminate but something to learn from. Owning Failure – How accepting your mistakes can transform them into moments of strength. The "Blue Ink" Lesson – How one lawyer turned public embarrassment into a courtroom victory. The Language of Leadership – Why small word choices (like using the instead of a) can change how people perceive your authority. Embracing Change – How preparation, adaptability, and voice help you thrive through uncertainty. Building Self-Worth – Why being your own hero is the foundation of authentic confidence.     In this episode: [00:00] Meet Judge Rosemarie Aquilina, her story from Munich to Michigan's first female JAG Corps member [02:00] Fear, failure, and the courage to show up anyway [06:30] The "blue ink" courtroom story and lessons in embarrassment [09:30] How metaphors and language shape persuasion [11:00] Embracing change, preparation, and control [15:40] Why Judge Aquilina never asks "why" [18:00] The difference between a solution and the solution [22:00] How to be an insider in your own life [26:00] Writing as a tool for self-discovery and healing       Resources & Links: 📘 Speak Up: Lessons in Trusting Your Instincts – Buy the book here 🌐 Follow Judge Rosemarie Aquilina – Website   Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Follow Heather on Facebook Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  342: The Secret Formula to Being a Successful Negotiator-Ambition + Empathy with John Lowry 30.10.2025 41min

  In today's episode, Heather sits down with John Lowry, lawyer, negotiation coach, and author of Negotiation Made Simple, to uncover what it really takes to become a confident, effective negotiator. John's experience as a professor at Pepperdine University's renowned Straus Institute for Dispute Resolution, CEO of The Lowry Group, and consultant to major organizations gives him a unique lens into the psychology and strategy behind every great deal. Together, Heather and John explore how mastering negotiation isn't just about tactics; it's about managing yourself, understanding others, and learning to balance ambition with empathy. In this episode, you'll learn: The Inner Negotiation – Why the first and most important negotiation happens inside your own mind and how managing your emotions, fears, and self-talk determines your success. Cooperation vs. Competition – How to know when to lean into collaboration and when to assert your position with strength and clarity. The Power of Patience – Why "you often pay for the time you save" and how slowing down the process helps you make better, more strategic decisions. Axelrod's Four Steps to Effective Negotiation – Start cooperatively, respond in kind, forgive, and be clear. John and Heather unpack how these steps build trust and drive results. The Ambition + Empathy Equation – What Harvard research reveals about top dealmakers and how combining drive with understanding gives you a competitive edge. Real-World Lessons – Insights from John's work with executives, mediators, and organizations on how to use negotiation to build healthier relationships and stronger outcomes. In this episode: [00:00] Meet John Lowry – Lawyer, author, and negotiation expert [02:46] The first negotiation: managing yourself [06:17] When to cooperate and when to compete [10:47] Getting comfortable with uncertainty [14:49] Why patience pays in negotiation [18:00] Recognizing signals vs. words [22:14] Forgiveness and cooperation in business [26:29] Collaboration vs. cooperation explained [31:12] Building trust through clarity [35:20] Ambition and empathy, the twin pillars of great dealmakers Resources & Links: 📘 Book: Negotiation Made Simple by John Lowry 🎙️ Podcast: Negotiation Made Simple Podcast 🌐 The Lowry Group: lowrygroup.net Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  341: Designing Your Home and Your Life. How to Use Design Principles to Get What You Want 23.10.2025 36min

  In today's episode, Heather sits down with award-winning interior designer Manuella Moreira, founder of Manuella Moreira Interiors, to talk about what it really means to advocate for yourself in business, creativity, and life. From her leap of faith leaving a stable job to launching her own design studio, to building a media presence with features in Forbes, The New York Times, and Architectural Digest, Manuella shares how trusting your intuition and showing up with courage can open the doors you've been waiting for. Together, Heather and Manuella explore how self-advocacy, boundaries, and creativity intersect and how you can design a life that feels as beautiful as it looks. In this episode, you'll learn: How to Know When It's Time to Leap – Why "ready" is a choice, not a feeling. The Art of Advocacy – How to speak up for your business, your worth, and your creative vision without feeling like you're bragging. The Client Experience – Why the best designs aren't about your style but your client's story. Media & Momentum – How Manuella built lasting relationships with top publications and became a trusted design voice. Avoiding Burnout – What moving across the country taught her about balance, intuition, and redefining success. Saying Yes Before You're Ready – How the universe meets you halfway when you take bold action. In this episode: [00:00] Heather's update on podcast consistency and introducing Manuella [03:26] Manuella's journey from firm designer to founder [06:45] The Bali trip that changed everything [10:45] Advocating for yourself as an entrepreneur [16:44] Landing her first Forbes feature and how to stand out with media [22:20] Knowing your audience and serving their needs [24:30] Collaborating with BEHR Paint for the Color of the Year reveal [25:50] Advocating for your boundaries and avoiding burnout [31:30] The power of asking and what to do when you get a "no" [33:36] Manuella's new podcast and why she believes design is for everyone Resources & Links: 🌐 Manuella Moreira Interiors: manuellamoreirainteriors.com 📸 Follow Manuella on Instagram: @manuellamoreirainteriors 🕯️ Explore Manuella's candle collection: https://manuellamoreira.com/shop/ 🎧 Listen to Manuella's podcast on design and intentional living: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/design-unscripted/id1807446750 Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  340: How to Advocate for Yourself at Work. Step 3-Master the Ask 09.10.2025 23min

  In today's episode, Heather wraps up her three-part series on how to advocate for yourself at work and this one's all about the magic moment: mastering the art of the ask. If you've ever hesitated to ask for what you want because you weren't sure how to do it gracefully, persuasively, or confidently, this episode is for you. Heather breaks down what true charisma really means (it's not about being flashy or loud!) and how you can use empathy, storytelling, and the right tone to inspire others to say yes. With powerful stories, evidence-based research, and step-by-step guidance, Heather shows you how to turn your next "ask" into a collaborative, impactful conversation that gets results. In this episode, you'll learn: What Charisma Really Is – It's not charm or popularity, it's the ability to get people to act. How to "Know Your Jury" – Why understanding your audience's pain points, needs, and goals changes everything about how you ask. The Power of Believing in Your Jury – How your energy and mindset shape the way others respond to you. Storytelling vs. Metaphors – Why the right metaphor can connect faster and hit deeper than a long story. The Role of Evidence – How to collect and create evidence to strengthen your case before you ask. Tone Over Body Language – The science behind why tone of voice carries more weight than posture or facial expressions. The "What Now?" Question – What to ask if your first request doesn't get a yes and how it helps you find your next step. Resources & Links: 📘 Free Guide: Advocate for Yourself at Work – Download Heather's companion workbook to put this three-part series into action. 🌐 The Elegant Warrior – Visit elegantwarrior.com for more resources In this episode: [00:00] Welcome to Part 3: Mastering the Art of the Ask [01:15] What "charisma" actually means [04:45] Knowing your jury and why it matters [06:40] The difference between empathy and perspective [09:10] Believing in your jury before they believe in you [11:23] Why your words matter more than your body language [13:45] Storytelling vs. metaphor: what connects faster [16:10] How to collect and create evidence [18:30] The truth about tone of voice and energy [20:50] What to do when your ask doesn't get a yes [23:00] Putting it all together: the three steps of self-advocacy 💬 Quote of the Episode "Before you worry about them believing in you, try believing in them and see what a difference that makes." Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com   The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  339: How to Advocate for Yourself at Work. Step 2-Ask for What You Want Out Loud and With Delight 08.10.2025 20min

  In this second episode of Heather's three-part series on how to advocate for yourself at work, she dives into one of the most transformative steps: asking for what you want out loud and with delight. Building on the foundation from Part 1 ("Know What You Want"), Heather explores why choice and energy are everything when it comes to advocating effectively. Asking for what you want isn't just about words—it's about how you feel when you ask. From her years as a trial attorney to her experience coaching clients, Heather reveals how shifting your beliefs can transform your results, your confidence, and your career. In this episode, you'll learn: Why Manifesting Isn't Enough – You can journal, visualize, and set intentions—but to get results, you must also advocate out loud to the person who can give you what you want. The Hidden Cost of Hinting – How implying your desires (instead of saying them) leads to resentment, and how to break that pattern. The Energy of Asking – Why your energy speaks louder than words, and how delight, curiosity, and confidence attract what you want. The BEAR Formula – How your Belief, Energy, Action, and Result connect—and how changing your belief changes everything. The Belief Triangle – A powerful framework for building unshakable confidence: believe yourself, believe in yourself, and believe you can help. Real Talk from the Courtroom – Heather's story of how asking out loud (and with delight) changed her career and her results. Resources & Links: 📘 Free Download: Companion Guidebook-How to Advocate for Yourself at Work 📚 Advocate to Win – Heather's book on mastering the art of self-advocacy 📖 The Lion Tracker's Guide to Life by Boyd Varty – as mentioned in this episode 🌐 The Elegant Warrior – Visit elegantwarrior.com for more resources In this episode: [00:00] Welcome back: Step two of self-advocacy [01:47] Why "asking out loud" is a choice—and how to make it [04:08] The difference between manifesting and advocating [06:33] Why implying what you want leads to frustration [08:55] The danger of resentment when you don't ask directly [10:31] How your energy reveals your belief [13:39] The BEAR Formula: belief → energy → action → result [16:02] Choosing beliefs that lead to confidence and delight [17:40] The Belief Triangle: building your foundation of self-trust [18:29] What's next: Step three—Mastering the Art of the Ask 💬 Quote of the Episode "Your energy is your belief made visible." Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com   The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  338: How to Advocate for Yourself at Work-the 3 Steps that Work. Step 1-Know What You Want 07.10.2025 20min

  In today's episode, Heather kicks off a special three-part series on how to advocate for yourself at work, whether you're seeking a raise, a promotion, or a new opportunity. Advocacy isn't just about asking, it's about asking in a way that makes you likely to get it. This first episode focuses on the foundation of self-advocacy: knowing what you want. Heather shares how clarity, specificity, and the courage to want what you want can completely change the way you approach your goals. Through real client stories and practical tools, she reveals why defining what you want is the key to every other step of advocacy and how small, strategic steps can lead to big wins. In this episode, you'll learn: The Three Steps of Advocacy – Why every successful ask starts with clarity, confidence, and follow-through. The Power of Specificity – How breaking your goal into smaller steps (and knowing who can give you each one) can change your results. Permission to Want What You Want – Why allowing yourself to desire something, even when it feels uncomfortable, is essential for growth. Redefining the Win – How success isn't just about getting the job or promotion, but building belief in yourself and evidence that you can do hard things. A Real-World Story – How one client went from dropping her resume on LinkedIn to securing multiple interviews and rediscovering what she truly wanted. Resources & Links: 📘 Free Download:  Companion Guidebook-How to Advocate for Yourself at Work📚 Advocate to Win – Heather's book on mastering the art of self-advocacy🌐 The Elegant Warrior – Visit elegantwarrior.com for more resources In this episode: [00:00] Welcome to the three-part series on self-advocacy [01:08] Why knowing what you want changes everything [03:30] From big dreams to actionable steps [05:52] A client's story: turning a resume drop into an opportunity [10:31] Learning to want what you want [15:17] Redefining what it means to "win" [17:40] Believing you have your own back [19:58] What's next: Step two, asking for what you want out loud and with delight 💬 Quote of the Episode "Knowing what you want is the foundation of advocating for yourself. When you allow yourself to want what you want, you've already begun to win." Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com   The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.  
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  337: Your Extraordinary Life-How to Live It with Simone Knego 02.10.2025 27min

  In today's episode, Heather speaks with Simone Knego, author of The Extraordinary Unordinary You, about what it truly takes to build confidence, embrace your story, and live fully. From adopting three children from South Korea and Ethiopia, to climbing Mount Kilimanjaro, to co-hosting a podcast with her daughter, Simone's life has been a series of extraordinary experiences that shaped her outlook on resilience, patience, and self-worth. Together, they unpack how confidence is not about being perfect, but about choosing to see yourself differently and taking small, brave steps toward growth. In this episode, you'll learn: Why Patience Builds Confidence – How parenting her son Noah taught Simone to redefine patience and see it as a strength. The Power of Choices – Why even small, bold choices can completely change your trajectory. Living Like You Have One Life – Lessons from her daughter Mili on resilience and joy despite difficult beginnings. Climbing Your Own Mountains – Simone's Kilimanjaro climb and how it inspired her to say "yes" to growth outside her comfort zone. Breaking Free from "Just" – Why removing the word just from your vocabulary transforms the way you see your value. Control-Alt-Delete for Confidence – Simone's simple mindset tool for shifting negative self-talk in the moment. Resources & Links: 📖 The Extraordinary Unordinary You: Follow Your Own Path, Discover Your Own Journey – Get Simone's book 🎙️ Her Unshakeable Confidence Podcast – Simone's podcast with her daughter 🌐 Simone Knego's Website – Learn more about her work and upcoming book Real Confidence In this episode: [00:00] Meet Simone Knego, author, speaker, and mother of six [03:45] Why patience is the foundation of confidence [10:37] Choices that shape your story – stepping out of line [12:59] Lessons from Mili: you only get one life [15:19] Climbing Kilimanjaro and finding purpose [20:06] Breaking free from "just" and claiming your value [22:26] Building unshakable confidence with her daughter [24:42] Control-Alt-Delete: a confidence reset tool [27:00] Where to find Simone and her books Connect with Heather: Schedule a call with Heather Follow Heather on Instagram Website Watch Episodes on Youtube Heather's TikTok ‍ heather@elegantwarrior.com The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user's own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.