Normalize therapy.

Normalize therapy.

Caleb & Verlynda Simonyi-Gindele
Country USA
Language EN-US
Episodes 340
Latest 17.08.2026

Formerly known as The Marriage Podcast for Smart People, this show is co-hosted by married couple Caleb and Verlynda Simonyi-Gindele, both experienced counselors. They own Therapevo Counselling Inc., providing therapy to clients across North America via Zoom. The podcast aims to normalize therapy and discuss relationship topics from a professional perspective.

Episodes

  • What Does My Husband's Porn Type Say About Me? Healing the Body-Image Wound of Betrayal 17.08.2026 25m
    For the betrayed partner who saw exactly what kind of porn their husband was watching, and hasn't felt at home in their own body since. Caleb and Verlynda explain why his porn type reflects conditioning rather than a verdict on you, what to do with the impossible comparison, and how to heal the body-image wound of betrayal trauma without carrying his recovery. https://therapevo.com/healing-for-the-betrayed/?utm_source=podcast
  • Meeting the Needs Porn Was Meeting: How to Rebuild Real Connection in Recovery 17.08.2026 21m
    If you know why you watch porn but your needs still feel unmet, this episode is the "now what." Caleb and Verlynda walk through how to actually meet the connection, comfort, and validation needs porn was faking, with a concrete roadmap for rebuilding real relationships over time. For the person who's tired of white-knuckling recovery and wants the long game that lasts. https://therapevo.com/porn-addiction/?utm_source=podcast
  • Why Does Porn Escalate? Tolerance, Arousal Templates, and the Way Back Down 10.08.2026 28m
    If your porn tastes have intensified over time, even into content that disturbs you, this episode explains the mechanism behind the drift: tolerance, novelty, and your arousal template. Certified sex addiction therapist Caleb Simonyi-Gindele unpacks why the gap between what you watch and what you'd want in real life is so common, why the shame compounds, and how the drift can be reversed at the right level of intervention. Free consultation: https://therapevo.com/porn-addiction/?utm_source=podcast
  • Intrusive Images During Sex After Betrayal: How to Stay Present Instead of Powering Through 06.08.2026 26m
    If trauma images interrupt intimacy since the betrayal, this episode is for you. Verlynda explains why the freeze, lost arousal, and dissociation are your body's protection, and walks through five somatic pacing tools for staying present on your own timeline, plus a direct word for the partner who betrayed. Support from a betrayal trauma specialist: https://therapevo.com/healing-for-the-betrayed/?utm_source=podcast
  • A Relapse Is Not a Reset: Why Counting Days Sets You Up to Binge 03.08.2026 20m
    If one slip keeps turning into a three-day binge, the problem may not be your willpower. It may be your day counter. This episode is for anyone in porn addiction recovery who has stared at the "reset to Day 0" button: we cover why a relapse cannot erase your brain's progress, the researched reason broken streaks trigger binges, and the three moves that turn a relapse into fuel for more resilient sobriety. https://therapevo.com/porn-addiction/?utm_source=podcast
  • Surviving Infidelity When Your Partner Won't Do the Recovery Work 27.07.2026 25m
    You have waited one year, or three, or seven, and the person who broke your trust still isn't really doing the recovery work. This episode is a discernment framework for the betrayed partner: how to tell real recovery from performed recovery on a calendar, what the research says about kids and high-conflict homes, and how to build the power to choose when finances keep you stuck. Get support at https://therapevo.com/healing-for-the-betrayed/?utm_source=podcast
  • How to Stop Thinking About Porn: The White Bear Effect and Urge Surfing 20.07.2026 26m
    If trying not to think about porn has only made the urges louder, this episode is for you. Caleb, a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, explains why willpower fails by design, what actually happens in your brain during the 27 minutes an average urge lasts, and the four-move urge surfing skill that works instead. By the end you'll know exactly what to do the next time a wave hits. https://therapevo.com/porn-addiction/?utm_source=podcast
  • The Repair Most Couples Skip: How to Reconnect After a Fight 16.07.2026 20m
    If your fights technically end but the distance lingers for hours or days, this episode is for you. Caleb and Verlynda unpack why repair, not the absence of conflict, is what actually keeps a marriage close, how to calm a flooded nervous system before you talk, and what a real apology sounds like versus the hollow "you're right, I'm sorry." Start here: https://therapevo.com/couples-counseling/?utm_source=podcast
  • Should I Stay or Leave After an Affair? Why You Don't Have to Decide Yet 13.07.2026 28m
    If you just found out about an affair and everyone is asking you whether you'll stay or go, this episode is the permission you may not know you need. Caleb and Verlynda explain why a decision made in the first raw weeks is unreliable, what a structured pause actually looks like, and the full range of options that live between staying exactly as you were and ending it today. This is not a push to stay or to leave, but a way to protect your right to choose well. Learn more at https://therapevo.com/infidelity-recovery-for-couples/?utm_source=podcast
  • Why Am I Attracted to Certain Porn? Reading the Wound Underneath 09.07.2026 26m
    If you have ever wondered why one specific kind of porn pulls you in when you scroll past everything else, this episode is for you. Caleb and Verlynda unpack the idea of your arousal template, why porn so often becomes a way to medicate an old wound rather than a simple matter of sex drive, and why understanding the why does more than white-knuckling ever will. There is also a direct, compassionate word for betrayed partners. Whether you are a man or a woman, this one is worth your time. https://therapevo.com/porn-addiction/?utm_source=podcast
  • Hysterical Bonding: Why You Want Him More After Betrayal 06.07.2026 24m
    If you discovered a betrayal and found yourself wanting your partner more instead of less, this episode is for you. We unpack what hysterical bonding is, why your nervous system reaches for the very person who hurt you, and the crash in desire that often follows months later, so you can stop treating your own response as the problem. Start here for support: https://therapevo.com/healing-for-the-betrayed/?utm_source=podcast
  • Why Discovering Betrayal Feels Like You're Going Crazy 02.07.2026 31m
    In the first days after discovering a partner's betrayal, the disorientation can feel like losing your mind, and your nervous system has a clinical reason for doing exactly what it's doing. Caleb and Verlynda walk through what reality rupture is, why every past memory is suddenly suspect, and four practical conditions that help your nervous system reorient against the truth. https://therapevo.com/healing-for-the-betrayed/?utm_source=podcast
  • The Year-Two Wall in Betrayal Trauma Recovery: Why You Still Feel Dead Inside 29.06.2026 35m
    Eighteen months in, your partner is sober, transparent, and doing the work. And you still feel like a stranger in your own life. In this episode we name what we call the year-two wall in betrayal trauma recovery, why your nervous system is on its own timeline regardless of your partner's behavior, and the two reasons most partners get stuck at this phase, which is almost always both at once. Practical, clinically grounded, and the conversation almost nobody else is having. https://therapevo.com/contact-us/?utm_source=podcast
  • Restitution After Betrayal: The Repair Work an Apology Cannot Do 27.06.2026 34m
    You apologized. You meant it every time. And it still isn't reaching your partner. In this episode, we walk through restitution after betrayal: the named clinical work that creates the conditions for repair, structured around three components and an honest look at the multi-year arc. For the partner who caused the harm and wants to do the work seriously, the prescription is here. https://therapevo.com/help-for-the-betrayer/?utm_source=podcast
  • Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction (PIED): Recovery Beyond Abstinence 27.06.2026 34m
    You quit porn three months ago and you still can't function with your wife. In this episode, Caleb and Verlynda walk through what's actually happening in your brain, what the flatline is, and the recovery pathway most men in the abstinence-only forums never hear about. https://therapevo.com/contact-us/?utm_source=podcast
  • Is Your Spouse Using Therapy Language to Gaslight You? The Five Patterns of Weaponized Therapy Speak 15.06.2026 39m
    Three to nine months into your spouse's recovery, the language of healing can start to sound like a weapon. He says he is dysregulated. He talks about boundaries. And every conversation about what he did ends with you being the one who needs to do more work. In this episode, we walk through the five most common patterns of weaponized therapy speak, why DARVO with a clinical vocabulary is harder to name than ordinary gaslighting, and what to actually do when you hear it. https://therapevo.com/healing-for-the-betrayed/?utm_source=podcast
  • Why You Hate Your Porn Use But Still Can't Stop 08.06.2026 29m
    If you have promised yourself again and again that this would be the last time and ended up back in the same place, this episode is for you. Caleb walks through why hating your porn use is not the same as being able to stop, why self-disgust often fuels the cycle rather than interrupting it, and what actually starts to make the loop lose its grip. For more on this and to book a free 20-minute consult, visit https://therapevo.com/porn-addiction/?utm_source=podcast.
  • Why the Betrayer Keeps Hurting Their Partner During Recovery 01.06.2026 30m
    If you've stopped acting out, started doing the repair work, and your partner still ends up hurt by the conversations you thought you handled well, this episode names what's actually going on. Caleb and Verlynda walk through the empathic stress paradox, the three shame patterns that re-injure your partner during active recovery, and why individual therapy on shame is often the missing piece. https://therapevo.com/help-for-the-betrayer/?utm_source=podcast
  • Trickle Truth and Why Recovery Keeps Restarting 25.05.2026 28m
    If you've been wondering why your betrayal trauma recovery seems to restart every time your partner discloses something new, your nervous system isn't broken. It's reading new evidence of past deception as a current threat, exactly as it's built to. In this episode we walk through what's actually happening in your body, why more information doesn't bring the calm it seems like it should, and what complete honesty actually means in this season. https://therapevo.com/healing-for-the-betrayed/?utm_source=podcast
  • My Spouse Won't Go to Couples Therapy: What to Do When Only One of You Is Ready 21.05.2026 32m
    When one partner wants couples therapy and the other won't come, most advice says wait. Clinically, that's a mistake. Caleb and Verlynda walk through what individual work toward a marriage actually looks like when only one of you is ready, why it isn't a venting subscription about your spouse, and what happens when your spouse finally walks in. Learn more at https://therapevo.com/couples-counseling/?utm_source=podcast

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